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 Thanks for wasting my time

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loualsindor
Elite Baiter


Joined: 23 Mar 2012
Posts: 1985
Location: A little rock in a big ocean


PostPosted: Fri Dec 01, 2017 8:49 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Another google hangout lad, I’ve been getting a bunch of ‘em. Never a genius in the bunch.
This is after a couple days of blather, we’ll skip to the good stuff.

PART ONE – THE TRANSACTION IS ILLEGAL

00000

Lad: From our investigation we find out that you sent money to one Mrs R0se J0hnson, (this lad: http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=288976)

(Methinks one lad is in another lad’s email…)

00000

Me: i've been trying to but she never reads my messages

00000

Lad: So the transaction was Illegal

00000

Me: WHAT?!?!
what do you mean?

00000

Lad: We found out that she is a fraudster and have been taken so much money from you since

00000

Me: well she's not very good at it, i haven't sent her any money at all because she's too damn stupid to read any of my emails.
lucky for me!
she's a crook?
how do you know?

00000

Lad: Your email is on our hard disc.

00000

Me: i wish she would read my emails, i'm surely going to give her a piece of my mind,
the bitch

00000

Lad: How much have you paid out to them now

00000

Me: nothing, like i said she never read my emails
she kept telling me to send money with moneygram and we don't have that here
the thieving little bitch.
are you going to arrest her?

00000

Lad: Yes after some investigation

00000

Me: i can send you all the emails she sent me if you want. what's your address?
there's a shitload of them

00000

(I bombed him with a pile of ‘em, pretending not to see his reply.)

Lad: Okay you don't need to the emails she sent to you

00000

Lad: Okay you don't need to the emails she sent to you. Because before we start any of our investigation or the release of your fund we will need your email password, I know is your privacy but we need it here to enable us proceed with investigation and make sure you receive your fund without any delay okay

00000

Me: i would never give my password to someone on the internet
that's ridiculous
and i think this is just Mr. Ray again, isn't it?

(Just a wrinkle to add another layer later.)

00000

Lad: Who is Mr. Ray

00000

Me: someone else who asked for my password. he didn't get it and neither will you

00000

Lad: Okay
Don't worry it is not good to give out password
We will carry out the investigation here in our okay
Since you don't give it out to someone we don't force people to do what they do not like

00000

Lad: good, that would be dangerous
the nurse is coming to take the computer, will you be on line tomorrow so i can talk about the money?

00000

Lad: Okay

00000

Me: Here's information for your investigation, it has here phone number in it

(A new day dawns and I slam him with a huge pile of emails from the “fraudster”.)

00000

Lad: Okay

00000

Me: what's going on?

00000

Lad: Everything is fine let talk on you can receive your fund okay

00000

Me: okay, that's very exciting

00000

Lad: Like I said yesterday I met your file
at the security strong room with every other transactions relevant documents
without the International Fund Release Clearance Permit Certificate.

00000

Me: amazing
so how are you going to send it to me?
and when?

00000

PART 2 – TIME FOR SOME STRAIGHT BAITING

Lad: Security Order: the amount registered in your favor is $18, 800,000,00 dollars
which you have to secure the below documents to enable our appointed agents in
Washington Field 00000 601 5th Street NW to release your funds according to
international government protocols or I will submit your file for legal
prosecution if you refuse to procure the needed certificate which will only
cost you only $786 dollars through independent corrupt practices commission
(ICPC). to secure the International Fund Release Clearance Permit Certificate
okay.

00000

Me: okay, then just take it out of the money and then we're done, nice and simple

00000

Lad: Is not possible because if it is possible we would have not let you know about the fee okay

00000

Me: oh, okay, that makes sense

00000

Lad: So I want to try and see what you can do to send the $786 so that I will secure the International Fund Release Clearance Permit Certificate okay.

00000

Me: okay, where should i mail a check?

00000

Lad: I will like you to send it Via bank to bank transfer okay

00000

Me: okay, that will work. i've done that before

00000

Lad: Like how long will it take you from now to transfer the money

00000

Me: i can have my nurse help me, probably today

00000

(He gets a little spooked at the thought of someone else getting involved.)

Lad: Who is the nurse

00000

Me: his name is robert, he helps me here in the hospice
at my age it's not easy to do things for myself

00000

Lad: Can you give his email address

00000

Me” i'll ask him for it when i see him after lunch
what's your email? i can give that to him

00000

Lad: And his phone number

00000

Me: okay

00000

Lad: How long from now as there is no time to waste

00000

Me: i have to get off the computer and go to lunch now so i will probably see him there

00000

Lad: okay

00000

Me: i'll be back on the computer in a few hours and will talk to you then

00000

(Four days later, after the Thanksgiving holiday weekend.)

Lad: Hello Carling Christie how are you and what bis going on I did not hear from you since I hope all fine

00000

Me: hello
what happened? i never got the account

00000

Lad: I told to give me the number and email of the nurse

00000

Me: he's gone because of the holiday, if you give it to me i can find someone to help

00000

Lad: Can you give me his email

00000

Me: [email protected]
but he's gone right now
if you send it to me i can get someone else to help

00000

Lad: YES

00000

is it a US account?
that's the easiest

00000

Lad: Am still concerned c

00000

Me: about what?

00000

Lad: about Robert

00000

Me: ???

00000

Lad: I need to know more about him
Why would you trust him

00000

Me: what?
he's not here, i'm going to take care of it myself
you're not making sense

00000

Lad: You can't trust someone to help you in this kind of situation

00000

Me: then i'll try to do it myself i guess

00000

(Another day passes.)

Me: where are you

00000

Lad: Since you going to send it your self
Send it MG Money Gram or western union

00000

Me: i don't think we have those but will find out for you and get back to you tomorrow
i have to get off the computer now

00000

Lad: Okay

00000

(Yet another day goes by.)

Lad: Hello
How are you doing today.

00000

Me: we don't have western union or moneygram here. i'm not surprised, it's a really small place
i think the account might be the only way

00000

Lad: Okay

00000

Me: sorry, like i said it's a really small place. we don't have much here

00000

Lad: How long will it take you from now to transfer the money

00000

Me: a day i suppose, i have to find a way to get to the bank

00000

Lad: or is robert going to help you

00000

Me: he;s on vacation still

00000

Lad: okay I will give you the account soon
now

00000

Me: okay

00000

Lad: Hello sorry for the delay.

00000

Me: hello

00000

Lad: Here is the bank account details to send the fee of $786 and get back to me
immediately with payment slip after you made the transfer with this bank account
information to receive your funds to you successful without any delay Ok.

(An account with so many misspellings that it would never work, the name of the town didn’t exist at all. Many thanks to the mods that handle such things.)

00000

Me: okay, i'll do what i can to send it today

00000

Lad: okay don't keep me waiting for along time
I waiting okay

okay

Me: i have to go to lunch, will contact you later

00000

Lad: Today or tomorrow?

00000

Me: not sure yet, i'll let you know

00000

Lad: Am waiting

00000

(The next day.)

Me: i went to the bank and they said there's so such place as ynon ny
what the hell?

00000

Lad: Hello am sorry I made a very big mistake in that bank account info

00000

Me: i was embarassed at my bank, it made me look like in idiot

00000

Lad: Am sorry are you still at the bank

00000

Me: no, that was yesterday

00000

Lad: Okay I will send you the correct bank account info now am sorry
Will you be able to make the transfer today

00000

Me: i'll try

00000

Lad: Here is the bank account details to send the fee of $786 and get back to me
immediately with payment slip after you made the transfer with this bank account
information to receive your funds to you successful without any delay Ok.

(Oink. A good one this time.)

Get back to me with the payment slip as soon as you make the transfer okay.

00000

Me: i'll try

00000


PART 3 – THE SEX OFFENDER AND THE SECOND PIGGIE

(So here’s where things get fun. The account holder’s name was a unique one so I googled it and found him in the registered sex offenders database. They don’t give a house number but the street address matched so I knew I had his guy. A really solid citizen, raped a 14-year-old girl and spent a couple decades in jail. Too bad for the lad that I have some religious issues with that…)


Me, the next day: is this person someone you know very well?

00000

Lad: yes

Me: then why are you having me send money to a criminal?
https://nysexoffenders.com/offender/xxxxxxxxxxx
he raped a little girl...what the hell?!

00000

Lad: If you are able to make the transfer today in less than 12 working hours you will receive your fund okay

00000

Me: Answer my question, what the hell is the fbi doing working with a convicted rapist?

00000

Lad: Every thing is alright now

00000

Me: he's a registered sex offender, that is NOT all right
i refuse to have anything to do with a monster like that

00000

Lad: Listen you are not doing any thing with him

00000

Me: i am a god-fearing man and i will NOT do ANY business with someone who attacks little girls. my soul would go straight to hell
surely you must see that

00000

Lad: He is only responsible in receiving the money

00000

Me: not from he isn't
i would rather give up my money than send anything to a pedophile
if we're going to make this work you'll need to have me send it to someone else

00000

Lad: He is not the person to deliver your fund but if you can not send the fee to the account I will give you an other account

00000

(Let the pig wrestling begin.)

Me: please do, i will NOT send it to him
i can probably go back to the bank today if you send it

00000

Lad: Will you be able to make a deposit in Citi bank north America

00000

Me: i don't see why not

00000

Lad: Did you have any of there citi bank branch near you

00000

Me: no, we only have a small satellite office of the local bank
but i can send to citi bank, no problem
sending to US banks is easy

00000

Lad: I just called my director he said you should go ahead and send the fee to xxxxxxxxxxx

00000

Me: NO
i'm not selling my soul for that pedophile animal
i'd rather not get the money at all than do business with someone who raped a 14 year old girl
he should be in jail until he rots
god will strike him down

00000

Lad: The account I have now is not a use account

00000

Me: if it's not a US account there may be a hold on the money for a few days, i known that can happen

00000

Lad: Then you have to send it to xxxxxx

00000

Me: I told you NO
what country is the other account in

00000

Lad: He can be able to get the money as soon as you send today

00000

Me: NO
like i said, what country is the other account

00000

Lad: Nigeria

00000

Me: in africa? what is the fbi doing with africa?
i don't understand

00000

Lad: We Have a representative offices in some Africa countries okay

00000

Me: i never knew that
why?

00000

Lad: You have noting to worry about

00000

Me:

when i go to the bank i'll find out if there will be a hold, i'll tell them it's for the fbi, that will probably help (A setup for coming back and saying that the bank wouldn’t do it because it’s a scam.)

00000

Lad: Due to our various investigations we have to set up a representative office in some countries to make our work easier for us okay

00000

(This ended up being really funny, who knew that one wisecrack could be so entertaining?)

Me: my tax dollars at work

00000

Lad: What did you mean

00000

Me: just making a joke, i pay taxes so the government can do things
like have an fbi office in africa

00000

Lad: What tax did you pay

00000

Me: i paid taxes all my life, that's the way it works

00000

Lad: I don't understand you

00000

Me: don't you pay income tax?
when you get a paycheck?

00000

Lad: Yes I do
But

00000

Me: that's pretty funny, your paycheck comes from taxpayers so you're sort of paying yourself
😄

00000

Lad: I don't understand you anymore

00000

Me: i'm just making a joke
about taxes
do you have the account so i can get to the bank

00000

Lad: Listen
I don't joke with any serious issue
I hate jokes
Are interested in this transaction or not

00000

Me: of course i am, don't be mad
i guess fbi agents don't have much of a sense of humor

00000

Lad: I gave you an account instead of sending the fee you told me he is a rapist

00000

Me: that's because he is, did you not look at the sex offender link i sent? i was serious
it even has the street name on it, so i know that it's him
the scumbag
read the page, it says 1 Conviction
Sexual Abuse 1st Degree:Contact By Forcible Compulsion
Sexual Intercourse, Deviate Sexual Intercourse, Sexual Contact
Victim
Female, 14 Years
that's terrible
14 year old girl
forcible = rape and i will NOT do business with that man
ever
you said you had another account in nigeria

00000

Lad: That is non of your business

00000

Me: are you not paying attention? i told you that i would rather not get my money at all than do business with a rapist

00000

Lad: And now am trying to get you another account

00000

Me: okay

00000

Lad: All that is requested from you is to send the fee to him, you are not doing any business with him

00000

Me: I told you no and that is final, i made myself very clear

00000

Lad: Am trying to get another account

00000

Me: good

00000

Lad: But you are joking with me

00000

Me: i was just making a joke, that's all
you're too serious
forget it

00000

Lad: I think you are not ready

00000

Me: what is that supposed to mean
taxes suck, i was just trying to be funny about it

00000

Lad: I don't joke when am working and don't try to be funny with this transaction

Me: okay, sorry
i have to leave in a few minutes, do you have the account

00000

Lad: I don't need any excuses from you anymore

00000

i'm not making any excuses
i'm trying to make this work just like you

00000

Lad: Really

00000

Me: of course

00000

Lad: I don't think so
You are just making things complicated here

00000

Me: what do you mean? i already went to the bank once and will again
what's the problem?

00000

Lad: You are suppose to send the money to xxxxxxx but you said no

00000

Me: that's right, god will strike that monster down and i will NOT sell my soul
i explained that to you already, he is pure evil and i will send him nothing'

00000

Lad; Note: you are not sending it to him but to our office

00000

Me: no, you gave me HIS account and i will NOT send anything to him and dirty my hands with his filth]
so stop asking
i would rather get nothing than to have anything to do with him

00000

Lad: I will send you a bank account details now

00000

Me: okay
i have to leave soon but will be back later in the day

00000

Lad: Just go to the bank and make the transfer okay

00000

Me: i will
if you send it now, i can but i have to leave in 5 minutes

00000

(Oink #2, that was a lot or work but at least I was entertained.)

00000

Me: okay
i will contact you when i get back

00000

Lad: Get back to me the payment slip okay

00000

(A day goes by.)

PART 4 – BANK CONFUSION

Lad: Hello what is the update now

00000

Me: sorry i missed you
we have a problem that we need to discuss

00000

Lad: Hello what is the problem

00000

(The poor lad…)

Me: the bank manager wouldn’t do the transfer
he said it’s a scam and you're not with the fbi
why would he do that?

00000

Lad: What did you mean
You said you will go to the bank and do the transfer

00000

Me: i told him i was sending the money to the fbi and he send that you were scamming me

00000

Lad: This is a story
I don't have much time to waste anymore

00000

Me: i'm not sure what to do, i don't know if this is all real or not

00000

Lad: Why the hell will I scam an old man like you
I am fighting against scam and you are c

00000

Me: i don't know, but i'm worried
do you have proof that this is real?

00000

Lad: I told you that there is no need to worry
I have many prove but I don't think i still have time for this transaction you have wasted a lot of my time

(Yup, and I’m not quite done yet.)

00000

Me: i have done no such thing, what are you talking about
i have done everything you asked

00000

Lad: Thanks for time I hate it when people talk about scam in a transaction am doing.

00000

Me: i'm not happy about it either, i need you to help me here
i want to go back to the bank and prove that you are honest

00000

Lad: You have wasted a lot of my time and you are talking about scam
I hate myself for this

00000

Me: the bank manager is the one who said it, we need to work together to show him it's not.
there's no need to hate yourself, we just need to help each other

00000

Lad: Just go to the bank tell them to send the money for you

00000

Me: i did that but i need to show the manager that this is all okay

00000

Lad: This has nothing to do with the bank manager just tell the cashier to do it for you.

00000

Me: well now that he knows about it, we need to do something to convince him it's okay

00000

Lad: What did you need to show

00000

Me: i don't know, is there a form or something?

00000

Lad: I don't think i have any confidence with you again in this delivery. The way and manner you are behaving is somehow unaccepted. What is going on?

00000

Me: hey, this isn't my fault so don't blame me. i'm doing everything you told me to do. i just need you to help now

00000

Lad: I don't have time to give any form now

00000

Me: so when can you send me some proof so i can take it to the bank? then i can make the transfer

00000

Lad: Tell them if they don't believe you then forget about this transaction

00000

Me: forget about it? because of something this simple? that's ridiculous
why would you do that to me?

00000

Lad: I can't continue I hate any thing funny

00000

Me: this is NOT funny, what are you talking about?

00000

Lad: Am a very busy Man

00000

Me: too busy to help me get my millions of dollars? how is that possible

00000

Lad: I need you to delete everything concerning this transaction from you system

00000

Me: what are you talking about?

00000

Lad: I have tried my best

00000

Me: don't you dare abandon me, why would you do that? you have my money

00000

Lad: I can only help you now if you can send the fee via western union or money gram

00000

Me: you already know we don't have that here, why are you doing this?

00000

Lad: Then find someone to help you and send it

00000

Me: this is an island, damn it. you know that
why don't you want to help me get my money

00000

Lad: It will only take some time

00000

Me: this is getting very suspicious now
you're not going to help me?

00000

Lad: Am done with you
You have two options

00000

Me: why are you doing this? all i need is something to convince the manager and you refuse to help
and then you say you're done with me]

00000

Lad: Go to the bank tell ll them if they don't believe you then forget about this transaction

00000

Me: forget about it? why would i do that?
we're talking about millions of dollars here and you're going to keep it?

00000

Lad: I have to go now you have two bank account details

00000

Me: and i just need your help to make the transfer. don't you understand what I'm saying?
this is very simple
why won't you help?

00000

Lad: Send it to any of them and get back to me
If they don't believe you send it to xxxxxxxxxx
If not
Then

00000

Me: i can't without your help, how many times do i have to tell you that? it doesn't matter which account i send it to, i still need to prove this is okay
then i can do it immediately
please help me so i can get my money, i can;t do it without you

00000

Lad: If you can't then please I need you to delete everything concerning this transaction from you system

00000

Me: delete everything? what does that mean?

00000

Lad: Then find someone to help you and send it

00000

Me: robert will be back on monday, maybe he can do it, the bank manager won't know what he's doing
that might work

00000

Lad: Who is Robert

00000

Me: my nurse, he's on vacation'

00000

Lad: What is his full name

00000

Me: robert xxxxxx i told you about him

00000

Lad: His name is among the scam artist we have here in our office
Now

00000

Me: what the hell are you talking about? he's just a nurse here in hawaii
i've known him for years

00000

Lad: Then who ray

00000

Me: who?
you mean the guy who tried to steal my email? he's just a phishing scumbag

00000

Lad: I told you I am seeing everything you are doing online here in our office

00000

Me: then you know i'm being honest with you
and stop spying on me unless you have a warrant
that's illegal

00000

Lad: This Robert you are talking about was working with Ray

00000

Me: what do you mean

00000

Lad: How much have you paid to Ray

00000

Me: i didn't pay him anything, he tried to steal my email

00000

Lad: For your information Ray have been arrested last week

00000

Me: for stealing email passwords?
wow

00000

Lad: He said he is working with you

00000

Me: that was all a lie

00000

Lad: Like I told you earlier delete everything concerning this transaction from you system
And stop contacting me

00000

Me: first he lied to me and now you're lying to me too?
why are you doing this to me

00000

Lad: I can't help u

00000

Me: just because i need proof for the bank? that's insane

00000

Lad: Since you said am trying to lie to you that is why I hate my self

00000

Me: well are you? i don't understand what's going on

00000

Lad: Good bye

00000

Me: what the hell? was there ever any real money or was that not true?

00000

Lad: Thanks for wasting my time

(You’re very welcome.)

00000

Me: wasting YOUR time? what the hell are you talking about? I've tried to do EVERYTHING you said and we're almost done
are you keeping the money for yourself?
what is going on

00000

Lad: I don't believe you

00000

Me: what do you mean

00000

Lad: Sorry I think I have contacted the wrong person

00000

Me: WHAT?! you said you had my email on your hard disc and you know me
you've seen everything i do on line, you know who i am
why are you trying to steal my money

00000

Lad: That's better than to waste more of my time

00000

Me: i haven't wasted any of your time, i have done what you said and went to the bank.
i just need your help so we can finish this and you're not helping
why?

00000

Lad: I don't believe you

00000

Me: why would i lie about the bank manager?
that makes no sense at all

00000

Lad: Better
You just have to confuse me to believe you again

00000

Me: what do you mean

00000

PART 5 – A CLEAN GETAWAY

Lad: I need your email password if not please forget about this transaction okay

00000

Me: WHAT THE HELL

00000

Lad: I don't need any word from you
If you can't give it to me

00000

Me: after all this you try to get my email?
YOU REALLY ARE A GODDAMN SCAMMER
you wasted DAYS of my time you criminal

00000

Lad: Okay good
Good bye

00000

Me: why would you do such an evil thing to an old man?
you should be ashamed of yourself

00000

Lad: Please stop contacting me

00000

Me: i'm going to give your information to the police you thieving bastard
you were trying to steal my money, weren't you?

00000

Lad: I am going to have you arrested

00000

Me: good luck with that, you're lying again just like you did all along

00000

Lad: It' will only take me a call
Good bye

00000

Me: bullshit
liar
you're not the fbi and we both know it now
you're just a terrible person trying to steal from an innocent old man
pathetic

00000

Lad: I don't believe you and you don't believe me

00000

Me: go get a real job before god punishes you

00000

Lad: So I can't help you

00000

Me: why would i believe you? you tried to steal from me

00000

Lad: Stop

00000

Me: god will strike you down, you animal
i'm already praying for your pain, you'll get what you deserve

00000

Lad: Okay

00000

Me: why can't you do honest work? why do you steal for a living

00000

Lad: Okay
Good

00000

Me: answer me

00000

Lad: For your information I have a good job

00000

Me: then why are you trying to steal from me

00000

Lad: I am an FBI AGENT

00000

Me: of course you're not, we both know you're just a scammer
i bet you CAN'T get a job, can you?

00000

Lad: I AM not trying to steal from you just that I don't believe you

00000

Me: don't believe what?

00000

Lad: I don't believe you
That's the only problem here

00000

Me: you tried to steal my email and now i know you lied about being with the fbi so THAT means you're a scammer and the bank manager was right
you're just a sad little man with no life

00000

Lad: I have every documents to prove that this %1000 real

00000

Me: your mother must be ashamed of you for being dishonest
if you had documents you would have sent them but you refused

00000

Lad: I don't believe you that is
The problem

00000

Me: what dont you believe
you make no sense

00000

Lad: I can't deliver this amount of money to someone I don't believe

00000

Me: what don't you believe

00000

Lad: I have to tell my director that we have to get the fund transfer into government account as unclaimed fund
Please am sorry
I can't help you

00000

Me: i don't think there is any fund, you've never prove anything and then you tried to steal my email, the fbi wouldn't do that

00000

Lad: I just so you will not believe me again and never contact me again concerning this transaction

00000

Me: SCAMMING BASTARD, I HOPE YOU DIE
you lied to me for DAYS

00000

Lad: Okay
Good bye

00000

Me: FUCK YOU

00000

And then he tried a couple video calls and blocked me after that. Perfect ninja exit, he never knew he was being baited and I got away clean. Good fun.

_________________
Closed lad accounts - 227

Easter Egg 2013

Sand Timer X 6
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Safari Save, Collines, Benin/Accra, Ghana - 700 miles on a bus

Evil Attorney epics - 22

- Why do you give shit about who i scammed you have to stop sticking ur nose on my shoes. Because it doesn't fit your noses
- Please bring me back before i hit my brain on a pan.
- This business is not like selling shoes and clothes in the market sir.

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Lake Amour
419Eater is my life


Joined: 17 Mar 2017
Posts: 446
Location: The Orphanage


PostPosted: Sat Dec 02, 2017 3:36 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Very nice read!

Quote:
Lad: Sorry I think I have contacted the wrong person


Laughing

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Mr Hump Here's Audio Book Collection
"Some of my co workers are beginning to say that you are making a fool of me but I strongly believe you" - Mr Hump Here
"You and your orphanage has destroyed my perfect life" - Mr Hump Here
"Also beside the rear entry as a quicker way to get Fellatio, is there any other thing you need?" - Mr Hump Here
"EAT SHIT AND FUCK YOURSELF WITH RUBBISH." - Tom Sawyer

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Yastreb
Common Street Thawth Vergabon


Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 15945
Location: Leading my wolf pack


PostPosted: Sat Dec 02, 2017 11:06 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^That can be especially hilarious coming after the "reconfirming" phase has been gone through and all has been declared satisfactory.

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I will heed the advice of a polite horse for it is written that more flies are caught with honey than vinegar... although assault carbines and monstrous wolves are still fun.

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