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 Hangout Lad and Alzheimer’s Vic

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loualsindor
Evil attorney in for the long haul


Joined: 23 Mar 2012
Posts: 1870
Location: A little rock in a big ocean


PostPosted: Tue Oct 03, 2017 6:32 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

A short adventure where a google hangout lad (the only form of life that is close to a hitlad in total brain matter) runs into an old man with dementia who asks lots of questions and then forgets the answers. I’m hoping he comes back but the first few days of silliness are worth sharing. Enjoy!

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Lad: Car!ing Christie
How are you doing Today?

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Me: hello
do i know you?

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Lad: Am David XXXXX From DHL Company and am here for your transfer

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Me: what do you mean?

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Lad: Am here to transfer your fund in your Account

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Me: what fund? i'm sorry but i don't know what this is about

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Lad: Your compassion funds worth $5.2million

(The source of the fund seems to elude his autocorrect a couple times. Ah, the confusion.)

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Me: WHAT?!!

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Lad: And if I may ask, do you have credit card or Walmart credit card?

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Me: is this some kind of joke?

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Lad: Listen to me my dear friend am not here to joke with you OK
Listen to me again
Do you have credit card?

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Me: no, i don't. i don't really have a way to use one
not in my condition
why do you ask?

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Lad: Because that's where we can transfer it easy
And you will receive it easy

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Me: i wish i did!
this is all quite a surprise
how did this happen?

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Lad: I'll transfer it to the credit card

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Me: like i said, i don't have one

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Lad: And what of Walmart card

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Me: walmart? we don't have that here, sorry. it's a really small place

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Lad: Okay

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Me: so where did all this money come from?

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Lad: Which country are you?

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Me: usa
in hawaii

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Lad: You are in USA in Hawaii and you didn't have Walmart office there?

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Me: not on this island, no
and like i said, i dont have credit cards anyway

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Lad: I didn't understand
What did you said?

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Me: i said i don't have a credit card, regardless of where it came from.
walmart or the bank or whatever

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Lad: Walmart credit card

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Me: and there's no walmart here anyway so that doesn't matter

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Lad: Okay

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Me: i didn't even know walmart HAD a credit card

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Lad: What of money gram or western union office?

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Me: i doubt it but i can ask my nurse to check when he gets back on monday
why?
you can't send that kind of money that way!
and you still didn't answer my question, why am i getting so much money out of nowhere?????

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Lad: This is competition fund from Benin Republic government

(Thank you again, autocorrect.)

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Me: what kind of competition?

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Lad: And they are doing it to everyone

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Me: everyone? what does that mean?

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Lad: My dear friend I have said my own and that is all I have to say

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Me: you said everyone is getting the money, i don't get it

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Lad: What else do you want me to say

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Me: you said there was a competition in benin
what kind of competition? that doesn't make sense
did i win something?

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Lad: Compensation fund

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Me: oh, that's different. compensation for what? i've never been to benin. that's in africa, right?

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Lad: Wast Africa

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Me: so why i am getting money from there?

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Lad: Not in real Africa

(?)

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Me: oh, i didn't know there was a difference between those. sorry

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Lad: Like I said this is from government

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Me: you never said why
i just want to be sure this isn't going to get me in trouble
i'm too old for that kind of thing

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Lad: No no no my friend this is not getting you in to any trouble OK
But if I may ask, How old are you now?

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Me: 93
how old are you?

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Lad: Okay, Am 52

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Me: lol, i don't even remember that long ago!

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Lad: So my brother
I'll need your full bank account information for the transition OK

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Me: i don't know about that, you know that's not safe, right? we're in google and i am NOT going to let THEM see that!
you can mail me a cashier's check, that would work

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Lad: I should email you

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Me: okay

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Lad: But if I may ask
Where can you pick up the money once is transferred?

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Me: if you send a cashier's check in the mail i can just have someone deposit it for me

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Lad: Transfer is all we do OK

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Me: then i'll need to create a new account or something

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Lad: Yes

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Me: maybe off shore, that's safer

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Lad: That's why I said that we need the Walmart card or any credit card
So that we can transfer the money to the credit card.

00000

(Time to push him toward the old lad loaded-ATM-card bit, just to add another change of direction.)

Me: i don't think it works like that but why don't you put it on a card and just send it to me? like a cash card or atm thing? won't that work?

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Lad: I think that will work but credit card is all the best

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Me: let me know because i can't get a credit card right away. i don't think they'd give me one anyway, i don't have a job. i retired a long time ago!

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Lad: Okay
Look around OK

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Me: they're going to take the computer away in ten minutes and i won't be online until monday so don't get worried if i drop off the line
look around where?

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Lad: For the credit card

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Me: that's funny
the only place i look is around this room
i'm in a hospital bed you know

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Lad: Ooh...
I don't know my dear

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Me: it's okay, i've accepted things. i have cancer and am in hospice here.

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Lad: Ooh...

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Me: they say i'll live maybe 6 months, maybe longer

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Lad: Am sorry for that OK

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Me: thanks

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Lad: You are welcome dear

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Me: but all that money would sure make my last days interesting
move to a nice place with a view of the ocean
and lots of beautiful nurses!
instead of the guy i have now. he's nice but a young girl with big tits would be better
Smile

00000

Lad: Okay
You said something about ATM card?

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Me: yes, can't you put money onto an atm card and send it to me? you can load money onto all sorts of cards these days, right?

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Lad: Okay

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Me: then you can just mail it to me, that's easy

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Lad: Should we send the ATM card or will you bring the credit card?

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Me: like i told you, i don't have a credit card
i have to get off the computer now, can we finish our arrangements on monday?

00000

Lad: Okay

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Me: okay, see you then

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(And then I was gone.)

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Lad: But the ATM card will cast you some little money
Are you there?

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(Monday arrives and the lad is back. Unfortunately for him, our poor old guy has a REALLY short memory. It eventually seems to get on the poor little pet’s nerves.)

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Lad: Hello Dear Brother
How are you doing today?

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Me: hi

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Lad: How was your day going

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Me: same as always
thats how hospice is

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Lad: Good

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Me: not really

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Lad: I know you are getting better right now right?

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Me: nope, just getting older
this is my last stop

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Lad: Ok
So how did you go about the credit card that we talked about?

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Me: what do you mean?

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Lad: We are talking about credit card before with ATM card.

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Me: i dont remember so well at my age, im sorry
remind me, okay?

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Lad: Ok
When are you getting on the credit card or should we send the ATM card to you?

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Me: getting what?
i dont understand

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Lad: I said that we want to transfer your fund in to an credit card so if you have the credit card you can get back to us with the information so that we will transfer your money on there.

00000

Me: credit card? i dont have a credit card

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Lad: Or should we send you the ATM card

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Me: what kind of atm card?

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Lad: The ATM card what you know

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Me: im sorry but i dont remember

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Lad: Or should we send an credit card?

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Me: send it for what exactly? i dont need a credit card, there's nothing for me to buy from this hospital bed

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Lad: How old are you?

(I guess he’s a bit forgetful too.)

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Me: 93

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Lad: Ok
Congratulations for that

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Me: probably won't get to 94
i had a good life

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Lad: So are you telling me that you didn't want your fund or what?

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Me: what fund?

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Lad: I didn't understand you again
Why are you keep on asking me some stupid questions

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Me: im sorry, im an old man and i dont remember things, please try to understand
i need you to help by explaining things
i'll write them down this time so i won't forget

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Lad: I told you about your compassion funds worth some millions Dollars

00000

Me: how much millions? that's very exciting

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Lad: You told me that you are going to weekend last week and coming back this week and all you do is to ask me stupid questions.
Please if you are not ready for your funds just let me know and stop insulting me OK.

00000

Me: they arent stupid, i just don't remember so well. wait until you get old and have to deal with alzheimer's
its very frustrating to me and no, im not insulting you
like i said, please explain what you said to me and i will write it down this time so i can remind myself

00000

Lad: I said that you have some fund with us worth some millions dollars

00000

Me: from where? that's awesome!

00000

Lad: Your compassion funds worth some millions dollars and we want to transfer it to you.

00000

Me: is that what the atm card is for?

00000

Lad: Yes

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Me: i see now, so are you going to mail it to me?
and how does it work?

00000

Lad: We can transfer it into the ATM card and send it to you immediately OK.

00000

Me: and then I can just use it?

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Lad: Yes

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Me: wow!
how much money is it?

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Lad: You mean how much it will cost you?

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Me: no, how much is going to be on the arm card?

00000

Lad: $5.2millions

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Me: that's crazy!
i love it
when can you send it?

00000

Lad: When you are ready to receive it

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Me: sooner the better, i'm not getting any younger
How will you send it?

00000

Lad: Okay
I'll transfer the money on it then send it through the dhl company and they will send it to you immediately OK

00000

Me: that's amazing
let me look and see if dhl delivers here, its a really small place
can you send it in the mail? dhl doesn't deliver here

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lad: Ok, I'll like to hear your voice so that we can talk better OK

00000

Me: im sorry but i don't have a phone. i don't think i could hear the stupid thing anyway, im pretty much deaf at my age
thats why i like the computer to talk to people

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Lad: Okay
But I don't think you can receive the ATM card through mail

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Me: why not? you just put it in an envelope don't you?

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Lad: Because if you received it through mail that means you are not going to use it.
Ok

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Me: what do you mean by that?
of course i'll use it, it doesn't matter how it gets here

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Lad: If is envelope that will be better

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Me: that will work in the mail

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Lad: Okay yeah, So when is it going to be because is going to cost you some little fees and I hope you know that?

(I’ve been running him around in circles for days and it finally occurs to him that his job is really to soak me for some cash.)


00000

Me: what do you mean?

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Lad: It will cost you some little money

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Me: for what?

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Lad: Before you receive it

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Me: right, but what is it for

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Lad: Since you didn't have the credit card! We want to transfer the money through the ATM card and you will start using it.

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Me: but what is the fee you mentioned

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(And now he starts rushing and his auto-correct makes life even more frustrating for him.)

Lad: You will use it to widows your money everyday by day

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Me: im sorry, what do you mean by widows? that didnt make sense

00000

Lad: The fee is the transfer fee ofcuse
Listen to me Car!ing Christie

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Me: i am

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Lad: If you are not ready for your funds just let me know and stop insulting me

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Me: im not insulting you, you said " You will use it to widows your money everyday by day"
what does that mean?
and of course i want the money

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Lad: So are you Weller to sand the money or not?

(That was a good one…)

00000

Me: now you typed "weller to sand" and that makes no sense at all. are you using your phone so that it changes the words?

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Lad: I didn't understand

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Me: look at what you sent, i think the words got changed "weller to sand" makes no sense
was it "willing to send"?

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Lad: Ooh...

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Me: pretty funny
what did you mean about the money every day by day?
hello? are you there?
where are you? please don't ignore me, i want to get this done so i can get the card
please come back!
was this all just some sort of mean joke?

00000

He bolted but, if he’s a typical hangout lad, he’ll be back in a few days. I fear that our poor Car1ing won’t have “written everything down” correctly.
Hehehe.

_________________
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Padme
#1 Moderator


Joined: 27 May 2005
Posts: 4968
Location: The Rebel Base


PostPosted: Tue Oct 03, 2017 7:23 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

That's funny, you should do one where your character is lucid, but forgets everything when they go to sleep, so the lad has to try and rush them through the con to the payment stage before they go to bed, otherwise they have to begin again from zero in the morning. Maybe some days let them get really close, like you're about to drive to the bank, but you have a glass of wine and fall asleep....

_________________
"Your knife will surely cut off your head trust me. Useless man zombie."
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loualsindor
Evil attorney in for the long haul


Joined: 23 Mar 2012
Posts: 1870
Location: A little rock in a big ocean


PostPosted: Tue Oct 03, 2017 7:29 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Snicker...oh yes, a world of possibilities! I think I'm about to have some trouble reading my own handwriting this time around...

_________________
Closed lad accounts - 223

Easter Egg 2013

Sand Timer X 6
Sand Timer Sand Timer X 5

Safari Budapest/Fiji - 22,500 miles
Safari Save, Collines, Benin/Victoria Island, Nigeria - 448 miles on a bus
Safari Save, Collines, Benin/Accra, Ghana - 700 miles on a bus

Evil Attorney epics - 22

- Why do you give shit about who i scammed you have to stop sticking ur nose on my shoes. Because it doesn't fit your noses

- Please bring me back before i hit my brain on a pan.

- This business is not like selling shoes and clothes in the market sir.

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