The adventures of a German farmer - Ongoing

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Posted: Thu Mar 05, 2015 6:55 pm

Vass? He haff allus der monie vit him in ein farmhauss, but nein gettin der cashen to der diplo-heir? Vhy das ist der big schitzenstormer, est os ein U-betcha!

This is a fun bait.

Posted: Thu Mar 05, 2015 7:13 pm

The lad wanted someone that could speak English. Well, the neighbor *does* speak English, doesn't she?

Posted: Thu Mar 05, 2015 10:05 pm

Indeed. I got a kick out of the lad asking for someone who can read , write and understnad English. That is a fairly common jab my characters toss that at lads when they reply to questions with scripts.

Posted: Fri Mar 06, 2015 2:33 am

Here come the lad lies.....

Da dada daaaaaaaaa!!!!

Diplomatic Nestor Newman wrote:

To: Grizelda Schmidt
From: Diplomatic Nestor Newman
Subject: Re: Peter
Body:
Dear Grizelda Schmidt/Peter
I told him that I am at diplomatic lodge of the United Nation and I have other consignments delivery to the owners. Please there is proceed to sending the money either through local Western Union or Money Gram, late me know the best one he will like to use so that I collect name with information from the airport officer here and send to him so that he use it to send the clearance money.

Tell him to confirm his address and local airport since you can write english.
I am waiting.
Regards,
Mr. Nestor Newman

---------------------

Posted: Fri Mar 06, 2015 1:03 pm

Grizelda Schmidt wrote:

To: Diplomatic Nestor Newman
From: Grizelda Schmidt
Subject: Re: Peter
Body:
Hallo diplomatic Newman,

Peter say he try Westurn Union. He think it not werk but try anyway. We looking now for scammer. Peter no have scammer and I no have scammer. I think burgermeister have scammer and we scam receite and send you. Peter ask why you keep asking his address? He send you many times. Why you keep loose his address? His farm hard to find. But I know where is because I his neighbor. Also, his address is Hauptstraße 13, 84337 Schönau. You have now? Write on paper so you no loose it.
We go to burgermeister house and scam receite now.

Grizelda Schmidt (neighbor from Peter)

---------------------

Diplomatic Nestor Newman wrote:

To: Grizelda Schmidt
From: Diplomatic Nestor Newman
Subject: Re: Peter
Body:
Dear Grizelda Schmidt,
I ask him his address because he was not writing it in English. When you made the payment what I need is the control number,name of the sender, address of the sender and amount send.

Grizelda Schmidt send me your phone number.
Newman.

---------------------

Posted: Fri Mar 06, 2015 7:23 pm

Burgermeister Strassgeschwandter wrote:

To: Diplomatic Nestor Newman
From: Burgermeister Strassgeschwandter
Subject: Westurn Unian
Body:
Hallo?

Diplomatic Nestor,

Here is Grizelda . I send email from the burgermeister his house. He has scammer so we can scam the receite. It is attached to email for you. We have hard time to find burgermeister. He was in gasthaus drinking bier. So, now you have money. You have address from Peter. Peter want know when you coming to farm.
We go now.

Grizelda Schmidt (neighbor from Peter)

Attachment:

---------------------

Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2015 12:44 pm

Oops!

That's not the file I wanted to attach. Oh well. The lad sees that it was not a WU receipt, even though it is not readable. So what's he do? He sends an email back to Grizelda to try to straighten this out. Laughing

Diplomatic Nestor Newman wrote:

To: Grizelda Schmidt
From: Diplomatic Nestor Newman
Subject: Re: Peter
Body:
Attn: Grizelda Schmidt,
I tried to open the attached file and find out that it was passport not western union. However what I need from the western union is the control number and the name of the sender and city where you send it from.
In which person name do you send it? because I know that i have not send any name to you for you to send the money. Please be truthful.
Newman.

---------------------

In the mean time, back at the farm, Peter, who is unaware of Grizelda's email, is hot to trot to get his consignment or whatever is supposed to be at the airport.

Peter Holubner wrote:

To: Diplomatic Nestor Newman
From: Peter Holubner
Subject: Re: Peter
Body:
Dear Herr Diplomatic Nestor Newman,

Did Uns receive das Moneys Ich sent Uns? Ve had to use Burgermeisters computer und blitzmachine. Ich do not haben ein und mein neighbor do not haben ein. That ist vy ve find das Burgermeister. Ich knov he haben ein. So vat time Uns come to das farm today? Ich vork here all day today, ja?

Your Freund,
Peter Holubner

---------------------

Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2015 2:24 pm

Grizelda finally got around to checking her email. Oh no! She has to fix this right away.

Grizelda Schmidt wrote:

To: Diplomatic Nestor Newman
From: Grizelda Schmidt
Subject: Re: Peter
Body:
Hallo Diplomatic Newman,

I look my email and see attachment. So sorry. I choose wrong file from burgermeister his computer. I go find Peter and tell him. Then we go find burgermeister and send right file. Peter went to Westurn Union and put informations you give him. You tell him your name, ja? You tell him you in diplomat lodge in Frankfurt, ja? You know this informations already.

Also, I go find Peter and then we go find burgermeister.

Grizelda Schmidt (neighbor from Peter)

---------------------

Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2015 7:08 pm

Oh the lad does not like all this complexity! He sends this email while Peter and Grizelda are out looking for the burgermeister.

Diplomatic Nestor Newman wrote:

To: Grizelda Schmidt
From: Diplomatic Nestor Newman
Subject: Re: Peter
Body:
Grizelda Schmidt,
Sorry you got it wrong because I have never give him name to send money, what I told him is that if he is ready that he should let me know so that I collect information from someone here.

However I am not seeing truth on him again and I wish to let him know that I will leave by tomorrow because I have over stayed.

Regards,Newman.

---------------------

When they finally get to the burgermeister's house, Grizelda sees the email!

Grizelda Schmidt wrote:

To: Diplomatic Nestor Newman
From: Grizelda Schmidt
Subject: Re: Peter
Body:
Diplomatic Newman,

We are here at burgermeister house again. We had to find him. He was at gasthaus again drinking bier.

First, I see your email. Please! Do not leave. We send you receite. Peter proof he not lying. He really go to Westurn Union and pay moneys to you. I not read his emails from you. I only know what he tell me. I see receite. We scam it in scammer and send you.

Peter say you are in Frankfurt. He lye to me or is that true? He say you have big box of moneys for him. He lye or is that true? This what he told me. Banker man tell him you come to Frankfurt with big box of moneys for him. You come to Frankfurt with box. Airport not let you take box out because of zoll. You tell Peter how much zoll is. You tell Peter your name and you need moneys to get box out of airport. You tell Peter you stay at diplomat lodge in Frankfurt. Is all this lye? You tell me truth and I tell Peter.

Also, I make the right receite on email this time. Now you have moneys. You get box out of airport. Tell me when you come to Peter his farm and I say to him. Okay?

Grizelda Schmidt

Attachment:

---------------------

Will the lad twig on this????

Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2015 1:08 pm

Well let's try something else.

Grizelda told Peter that Newman is leaving today. Peter gets worried and shoots emails to Newman AND Joe David. (of course they're the same lad, but it looks good)

Peter Holubner wrote:

To: Diplomatic Nestor Newman
From: Peter Holubner
Subject: Was?
Body:
Honoured Freund Herr Diplomatic Nestor Newman,

My neighbor tells Mir Uns are leaving today. Does she make ein joke mit Mir? You did not bring mein boxes yet. Vat ist happening? Ich pay Moneys und Uns leave nov? Vy did Uns not bring mein boxes?

Your business Partner,
Peter Holubner

---------------------

Peter Holubner wrote:

To: MR. Joe David
From: Peter Holubner
Subject: Help!
Body:
Mein Gute Freund Herr MR. Joe David,

You must help Mir. Your diplomat take mein Moneys und nov vants to leave Deutschland. Ich think he take all das Moneys im boxes from das airport for himself. Maybe Uns do not see him ever again. Maybe Ich can call polizei und they stop him at das airport. Ich think Uns should knov about this.

Varmest regards,
Peter Holubner

---------------------

Let's see if this breaks the lad's silence.....

Master Baiter Joined: 14 Feb 2015 Posts: 125

From a newbee perspective, this bait is funny AND instructive! Thumbs up

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