S. Larry Massbait - "YOU WILL DIE BY HAKUNA MATATA"

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Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2014 7:28 am

Another of my characters gets contacted by him.

Brenda wrote:

HOW DO I GET MONEY BACK???

Agent Larry wrote:

DEAR,BRENDA ,,ALL YOU NEED DO ,NOW ,BEFORE YOUR LOST FUNDS AND THE COMPENSATIONS WILL,BE TRANSFER TO YOUR ACCOUNT,YOU NEED TO PAY THE SUM,OF 1000,USD,BEFORE FUNDS CAN BE REALEASED TO YOU,HERE ARE THE DETAILS FOR YOU TO SEND THE FEES TO,THROUGH WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER , (snip) ,PLEASE ,SEND THE FEE,AND LET ME KNOW NOW.STAY BLESSED...

Not even bothering with the format now. Gomer will be so disappointed. Rolling Eyes

Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2014 11:16 am

Quote:

thanks for the format you send to us,please we have some difficulties here,if any client wants to come up with payments ,please you will help us pick funds and send our percent to us here in naija,that is you will send me informations to send to the client where they can send funds to

@Bort - please let us know when you have provided him with the fake mule, Darline is ready to pay.

Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2014 11:22 am

^ Big X has kindly agreed to play the mule. Gomer will email Larry with the good news very soon.

Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2014 12:09 pm

Gomer, feeling considerate, wrote:

BRODA

DIS CAN BI DONE. USUALLY MY FREELANCE GUYS PREFER TO USE DERE OWN PEOPLE FOR DIS BUT IS NO PROBLEM TO PROVIDE DIS FOR U

I HAVE MAN IN AMERICA NAME VIRGIL HILTS. HE WAS MAGA FOR SOME TIME N DEN WE GOT HIM WORKING FOR US TO PICK WU PAYMENT N BANK TRANSFER. HE IS RELIABLE FOR DIS KIND OF WORK BUT WHEN U SPEAK WIT HIM MAKE SURE U MAKE IT CLEAR DAT U R DI BOSS NOT HIM OKAY? HE IS KIND OF HUMAN THAT TRY TO WALK OVER DEM HE SEES AS WEAKER SO IS IMPORTANT U ALWAYS APPEAR STRONGER

U CAN REACH HIM AT DIS MAIL (snip)

HE WIL GIVE U HIS INFORMATION FOR PICKING FUND N DEN SEND TO U. U SEND ME MY CUT AND DEN I PAY HIM OUT OF DAT OKAY? HE GETS NO CUT OF INTIAL PAYMENT ALL OF DAT MUST GO TO U. THAT IS THE PECKING ORDER. IT GOES HIM, DEN U, DEN ME AT DI TOP.

HOW IS JOB GOING? HOW MANY MAGA? ANY CLOSE TO PAYOUT YET?

ONE LUV

Anyone familiar with the Ozzy bait will know that the arrival of Mr. Virgil Hilts does not bode well for Larry's financial future at all...

Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2014 12:58 pm

To Gomer, Larry wrote:

dear,mr gomer thanks for the response,am very happy for,that well ,i have a close payout but the ,problem is that i have not receieve any funds from them,ever since i sent them informations,am still waiting for the best okay,but am so worried here because am really broke here no funds at all ,thanks once more,i will do that once i get payout ,stay blessed.........................

To Katie, Agent Larry wrote:

HELLO,KATELYN ,HOW ARE YOU DOING?THANKS FOR THE REPLY,I WILL BE WAITING TO ,RECIEVE THE FEE FROM YOU,ONCE YOU SEND THE FUNDS TO THE ,DETAILS I SENT YOU,AM WAITING (you'll be waiting a while) ,FOR YOUR FRIEND WE WILL TAKE CARE OF THAT ONCE SHE COMPLY WITH THE RULES GOVERINING THE PROCEDURES ,AND ITS REALLY CONFIRMED FROM OUR,COMPUTER SYSTEMS,NO PROBLEM,OKAY ,STAY BLESSED...........

Katie wrote:

Thanks for that she'll probbably email you soon. her name is Poppy (snip) if you dont hear from her you can reach her at (snip)

Ive got the money now. It was a total fuckaround though I got there around 3pm like they told me and noone was there just some chicks that looked like crackheads or hookers or both. then FINALLY around 4 30pm these sleazy russian dudes turned up. Big guys and I mean in muscle (though one was mainly just fat). They gave me the thousand dollaars and said i gotta pay it back plus $100 interest in two weeks. Will I get my compensation in that amount of time? Cause those guys were fucking scary and i dont think its a great idea for me to be in debt to them...
'
But if i will definitely get my compo before two weeks (they said the 14th of may.. or the 15th... i was pretty nervous its kind of a blur!) then ill wire you it to you right away. The western union place was closed by the time i got back to the cbd but Ive already looked up the bus timetables for tomorrow and I can get there by about 8:30 am tommorow maybe 9pm at the latest

Thanks for everything. its such a weight off my shoulders to know all this shit will finally be over. I still cant beleieve how STUPID i was to get robbed like that.

regards
Katie

Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2014 2:00 pm

I've been having a tough time motivating this lad--he has trouble with very basic concepts. He failed to recognize a basic "other lad chop" when I gave him a standard "I sent everything as per Mr. XXXXX's instructions, so where is my money?" reply. He simply re-asked for payment. So my character asked him why he is not doing his job and then the lad cussed me out (It was a nice, albeit short rant, but golly, why would he be so stupid with a hooked victim?).

Anyway, I have a suggestion:

Since he has not been bringing in monies, have mr> G---r tell him that he has given his mailing list and format to another lad (with a specific alias). Then a bunch of us should start indicateing that Mr. Alias has given us complete instructions, been very helpful and attentive and that we have sent the many fees to him.

Eventually Mr. G can let lazylarry know that the other lad is doing very well and getting a bonus whereas LL needs to step up his game. He has been given a golden format and a fat list of sure-win mugius. He needs to get his ass in gear.

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Mar 2012 Posts: 5380

This idiot went from original fomat to this:

Quote:

dear p,we will send you your,lost funds and the compensation ,once you send the fee,okay,please am waiting for you to send the fee okay,send the fee through this information through western money union transfer okay,here are the details,....FIRST NAME=>snipped< .OKAY AM WAITING NOW.

He never gave an amount, lazy lazy lad! Although his format should include a few more 'okay's.

Posted: Tue Apr 01, 2014 1:37 am

Lehigh Guy wrote:

Since he has not been bringing in monies, have mr> G---r tell him that he has given his mailing list and format to another lad (with a specific alias). Then a bunch of us should start indicateing that Mr. Alias has given us complete instructions, been very helpful and attentive and that we have sent the many fees to him.

Eventually Mr. G can let lazylarry know that the other lad is doing very well and getting a bonus whereas LL needs to step up his game. He has been given a golden format and a fat list of sure-win mugius. He needs to get his ass in gear.

Right now, I want Larry to trust and rely on Gomer. Eventually G will chop him, of course, but for now I think its very important for Larry to see him as an ally, not someone working against him.

But the new mule Virgil Hilts, on the other hand - I suspect he may be responsible for some chops soon.

Posted: Tue Apr 01, 2014 1:43 am

@Ginger Lee: If I've learnt one thing from Larry, its that you can never have too many okays.

Agent Larry wrote:

DEAR,KATELYN ITS OKAY,BY ME,ONCE YOU SEND THE FEE ,WE ,WILL WORK ON THAT,TO SEND YOU YOUR LOST FUNDS AND THE COMPENSATIONS,WILL BE SENT TO YOUR ACCOUNTS OKAY ,I WILL BE WAITING FOR YOU TO SEND THE FEE TOMOROW MORNING,AS SOON AS POSSIBLE OKAY,WAITING FOR YOUR REPLY,FOR YOUR FRIENDS LET HER MAIL ME FIRST BEFORE WE CAN WORK ON THAT OKAY,STAY BLESSED............

Katie wrote:

Thank you so much. I will go in on the first bus tomorrow to wire the fee.

Posted: Tue Apr 01, 2014 2:06 am

Katie wrote:

Dear Agent Larry

Ive just return home from sending the $1000 fee. I managed to catch the earlest bus and arrived in the city cbd just before 8 25 am! hows that for good time! Wasnt too bad of a line this early in the morn so i was in and out of there in about 15 mins and already sitting on the bus home at 9am

i put the scanned transfer slip in the attachment. How soon till i get my compensation funds?

Thanks for everything once again
katie

Posted: Tue Apr 01, 2014 2:50 pm

I'm going to hazard a guess he wasn't successful in receiving the money Katie sent.

Larry, a little angry, wrote:

HELLO, MR GOMER,YOU ARE A BIGG FOOL,YOU AND YOUR FUCKING CREW GOD WILL SURELY PUNISH FOR ALL YOUR WRONGS DOINGS TO ME,FUNNY ENOUGH,I DON,T KNOW WHAT YOU STAND TO GAIN IN THIS YOUR TRIKISH WAYS OF DOING THINGS WITH ME,WHATS YOUR PROBLEM ,MOTHERFUCKER ,YOU AND YOUR FUCKING LIAR CREW ,OGUN WILL KILL ALL YOU ALL,I WILL SWEAR FOR YOU ,YOU THINK I DON,T KNOW WAHT YOU ARE DOING,BASTARDS ,YOU ARE ALL DEVIL SENT RIGHT ,GOD PUNISH YOU ,YOU BLOODY LIRAS,DON,T YOU EVER MAIL ME AGAIN IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE ,BECAUSE IF YOU DO,I WILL MAKE SURE I PUT AN END TO THIS,BECAUSE I DON,T KNOW WHERE I WRONG YOU IDIOTS,JUST WATCH AND SEE,IT SHALL NOT BE WELL WITH YOU ALL.MOTHERFUCKERS................

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Mar 2012 Posts: 5380

I just got:

Quote:

send your asshole to whom ever you want idiot ,you people are just fooling yourselfs not me okay,bloody liars,i wonder what you stand to gain in all this rubbish you are saying bunch of idiots................god will punish you all okay.

He isn't mad enough, only 2 okays. And nothing about Ogun killing me.
My character doesn't know what he's on about.

Quote:

What the hell are you on about?
I ask you a simple question, how much?
You don't tell me so I offer $1.00 since you won't tell me how much.
what is wrong with you!
How dare you insult me in such a manner!
I will talk to your boss at the FBI about this!
You should never be allowed to talk to people with your terrible manners!

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Mar 2012 Posts: 5380

Quote:

all you need do now is to send me the 2,500 usd fee,before your lost funds and the compensations will be sent to you ,sent it to the above address i sent you before now,and once its confirmed we will send you ,your lost funds and the compensations okay,am waiting to read back from you soon,take care and stay blessed.............................

Only one okay, he can't be serious.

419Eater is my life Joined: 28 Jun 2013 Posts: 274

Hahaha. Great rant. He is only mildly peeved at me.

Quote:

dear xxxxxxxx,send the fee and stop wasting my time here okay,i don,t have time for this okay,am a buisness man ,send the fee and get back to me now ,now no fucking around with me okay ...............

I got three okays and one f-word, which isn't too bad of a catch. G---er certainly wins, though.

I attempted to mollify him:

Quote:

YOU ARE THE ONE WASTING TIME!!!

It has been more than a week since I asked you about the status of the man who scammed me. Has he been arrested? Or are you too incompetent to catch him?

I have asked and asked and asked. But you have wasted my time by ignoring this important question.

As an FBI employee, you are NOT a business man. You are a public servant. You work for me. Now get to work and do your job.

After you do this, I will send the money.

Posted: Tue Apr 01, 2014 5:08 pm

Quote:

you are a motherfucker asshole,you pun,kd fuck off

With any luck he will start twigging like this on potential victims. Lad pain=everyone's gain.

Posted: Tue Apr 01, 2014 10:30 pm

that's no way to treat a customer! top rants!

Posted: Tue Apr 01, 2014 10:46 pm

Larry hasn't even bothered to contact Mr Hilts either. What a lazy git.

Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 4:07 am

To Katie, Agent Larry wrote:

hello,you just monkey yourself not me,hope you know that ,just enjoy okay,sometimes i wonder what you stand to gain in all this (amusement, mostly),motherfucker,you are all bloody liars god will surely punish you all you hear me,ogun go kill all of una ok,were people na una bi make una en

Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 7:14 am

Katie wrote:

WTF??? WHAT are you talking about!? I dont understand ANY of this

Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 3:27 pm

I kept poking and prodding because I wanted a rant too Very Happy

My character wrote:

i sent the money like u said and now i havent heard back from u, what do i need to do now?

Insane lad wrote:

DEAR ,ROXY WHAT MONEY DID YOU SEND ,YOU FOOL,WHERE IS THE MONEY SLIP THAT YOU CLAIM YOU SEND YOU FAKEASSHOLE GET A FUCK OUT OF MY SIDE OKAY,YOU JUST FOOLING YOURSELF,GOD WILL PUNISH YOU,BASTARD.............

My character wrote:

wow dude, chill out!! i said i sent the money to the person u said, u never said anything about a payment slip, do u always treat people this way???? who is ur boss, i want to file a complaint

He's funny!

Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 3:44 pm

I'm starting to have serious concerns about this lad's mental health.

To Katie, Agent Larry wrote:

DEAR,KATELYN MCDONALD ,I CAN NOT PICK UP THE UNDS BECAUSE THE CONTROL NUMBER IS NOT COMPLETE,ITS MISS WITH ONE DIGIT NUMBER,SO THERE I COULD,NT PICK THE FUNDS YOU SENT ME,PLEASE CHECK OUT THE MTCN NUMBER AND SEND ME THE COMPLETE MTCN NUMBER,TO ENABLE ME PICK UP THE FUNDS THAT IS ,THE CONTROL NUMBER,THAT IS ,THE MISSING NUMBER THERE THERE IS ONE NUM,THAT IS NOT COMPLETE NOW,SEND IT TO ME NOW,SO I CAN PICK UP FUNDS AND SEND YOU YOUR,LOST FUNDS AND THE COMPENSATIONS NOW,AM WAITING NOW.......................BECAUSE THERE IS A MISSING CONTROL NUM, THERE ,JUST DO WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO FOR YOUR OWN BENEFIT ,OKAY,GET BACK TO ME AND SEND ME THE CORRECT DETAILS,BE CAUSE ME AND MY CO WORKER ARE SO WORRIED HERE ,ITS ALL FOR YOUR GOOD,FOR YOU TO PICK YOUR FUNDS OKAY,AM WAITING TO READ BACK FROM YOU SOON,AND STAY BLESSED.................

Everyone get all of that? Laughing

Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 4:09 pm

^^^^ Yeah, he is showing signs of true falkiness.

I just got this one from him. Apparently he is sure I am a nother guyman messing with him--but not so sure that he won't stop demanding payment- also--Death by Hakuna Matata? He has to know what that means, right? -- anyone know what the bottom part of the rant means?

Quote:

PLEASE ,SEND ME THE FUNDS AND STOP,BULSHITING WITH ME NOW,OR ELSE YOU WILL LEAVE TO REGRET YOUR LIFE ,YOU KNOW WHY?I WILL MAKE SURE I PUNISH YOU FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE,YOU WILL DIE BY HAKUNA MATATA,IF YOU ARE BEEN CUNNING WITH ME AM AN OGUN PRIEST ,SO,HELP YOURSELF NOW ,BEFORE YOU REGRET YOUR LIFE,OSHOMAKORIBBO,RATATA,SKIBIYA,...EMELE TEE,STRIMAYAMA................BELEDDOODO............

Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 4:11 pm

^ I have no idea, but I'm going to guess something along the lines of "god purnish your generation".

Quote:

YOU WILL DIE BY HAKUNA MATATA

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Mar 2012 Posts: 5380

Quote:

DEAR ,PRISSY ,HAKUNAMAMTA,WILL BEFORE YOU IF YOU AND YOUR BLOODY LIARS CREW,YOU DON,T KNOW ME ,I WILL DEAL WITH YOU,IF YOU DON,T SEND ME THAT MONEY NOW,PLS FOR YOUR OWN SAKE SEND ME THAT FUNDS OR ELSE YOU WILL DIE SOON,BECAUSE AM SPIRITUAL,SINCE YOU AND YOUR BLOODY LIARS CREW FELT YOU CAN MAKE FOOL OF ME,THERE YOU ALL GO WRONG ,WATCH WHAT WILL HAPPEN NOW,IF YOU DONT SEND THAT MONEY TO NIGERIA,I WILL MAKE YOU RUN MAD IN STREET IF YOU DOUBT ME ,DONT SEND THE MONEY,YOU THINK I DON,T KNOW YOU ALL ARE PLAYING GAME WITH ME,AFRICAN MAN LIKE ME,I WILL USE UDONBEYE FOR YOU ,SEND THAT MONEY,BEFORE YOUR LIFE BECOME MISERABLE,IF YOU THINK AM JOKING JUST MAKE FOOL OF THIS AND NEXT YOU WILL BECOME MAD,NOW AND FOREVER ,YOU ND YOUR PEOPLE WILL DIE A MISERABLE DEATH NOW,WATCH AND SEE,BETTER SEND ME THAT MONEY YOU CLAIM,BECAUSE YOU FELT YOU ,CAN MAKE FOOL ME,YOUR LIFE IS IN DANGER ,EXCEPT YOU SEND ME MY FUNDS NOW,EBERESHIAMACIN VUOAMEN EGBEE U YUO,AYE OR IAHA,.................

Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2014 5:29 pm

^^^ Wow.

I think he has stumbled upon a new format: Magic Hitlman. Shocked

It might be worth baiting. Perhaps you should reply that his curse has affected you--you read his email and then your cat died!

Now you want it removed. You will pay to have it removed but he must prove he has the power to remove it as well as place it. You are so scared that you are afraid to leave the house (too bad you can't go to WU while so terrified).

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