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 Diesel Smoke, Dangerous Curves and Dakar

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oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 6080
Location: All out of Bubble Gum!


PostPosted: Fri May 03, 2013 11:18 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

So I get the usual 'Age and Colour and Distance doesn't matter' type message and decide to Hitch up my Britches and see what comes of it if you get my 99? Let's start a few messages in:

Quote:
Hey there Alice,

You sure a looker I tell ya! Wow I am a new man after looking at that picture. Now I was looking for a new O.L. but I think maybe I can help you out.

You send me some of those Certificates and some more Pretty Pictures and we'll put the hammer down.



Quote:
Hi Dear,

Thanks for your reply, you make too much request. Well i appreciate your wiliness to assist me on my money transfer, and I'm very happy the way you made up your mind on my transaction and i believe we will archive our target on this my transaction and investment. I will visit the bank manager office this morning to secure more information of the transaction; i will also introduce you official to the bank manager as my foreign partner whom will receive my money on my behalf.

I will get back to you as soon as possible i return from the bank manager office to let you know what will be the next action on the transaction, I really want us to commence on the transaction immediately so that we see if the bank finish the transaction before next weekend. Please you should remember to keep the confidential of this my transaction for now to avoid the evil people; we don't need to let anybody know about the money until you receive all the money in your account. Take care of yourself. Bye


Good to see Alice is a patient one! The Wine I mean Swine should be flowing soon:

Quote:
Hey there little Missy Alice,

Don't go worrying and fussing about me making too many requests as I 'm an old
Trucker so I've seen and heard things that most others ain't never heard
tell of. Hope you don't mind I'm 48 years young? There might some Snow on
the Roof Baby but there's plenty of Fire Hose left in the Wiener
Wagon little Darling! So why don't we put the Hammer down cause I could
use a new Seat Cover if you're catching my drift. I'm sure enough getting tired of
those Lot Lizards anyways.

You got any more pictures for me? I always like to knows what I'm getting into if you catch my 99! Well I gotta go now as My Dinner is up at the Park and Puke then I'm clear off to Hog Town!

I got my Ears on Missy,

John


Any imaginary Trucker Talk would be appreciated if you catch my Charlie
Forty Roger!

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
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oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 6080
Location: All out of Bubble Gum!


PostPosted: Sat May 04, 2013 8:34 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
Hi Dear,

I’m happy to let you know that I have visited the bank manager's office like i told you on my last message just to get more information of the transaction to avoid any mistake from my side. After introducing you to the bank as my partner the bank manager requested that you my partner will only need to contact his office for introduction before they can proceed to next step of our money transfer process. Please i want us to follow instruction from the bank manager; you can open your attachment to see my father's statement of account document of the money.

The bank manager advised me to forward you his office contact information for you to contact his office for introduction so that he can start the process of transferring my money to your bank account. Please you should contact the bank manager immediately for introduction and you forward him the statement of account document while contacting him by email. Forwarding my father's statement of account document to the manager office will make them believe that you are the right person to claim my money on my behalf because they have a copy of the statement of account document in their bank. Please ask the manager the details of your bank account which you will forward him for to him for my money transfer to your position.

Remember the amount involve is $2million, here is the contact information's of the bank manager office.

"GBA" Account Department Office
Manager Office,
Tel: +Blah
Email: [email protected]
Contact Person: Mr. Abudul Sall.

Please contact the bank manager and introduce yourself to him as my nominated foreign partner whom will receive my money on my behalf as it transfer out of their custody. Remember to forward them the statement of account document by e-mail so that it will make them believe that i really nominate you to stand on my behalf. I want you to know that i depend on your able on this transaction because i didn't have any investment experience at all, so you keep me updated as you start your communication with the bank manager to enable me know when my money transferred to your account. I wait to hear from you as soon as you contact the bank manager. I did have personal connection yet, maybe we chat when i secure my personal connection OK. Bye


Lucky for me the Radio is tuned to a Country station for inspiration:

Quote:
Hey there Little Missy,

I thinks I can follow all that stuff you are saying if you get my 20? As soon as I drop this Sow Belly off in Chi Town I think we can get all this straightened out real soon like too! As I told you I am getting kinda tired of the Pickle Parks any how's about you being my New O.L.? I knows that's quick but that's just the kind of Guy I am; straight up and honest. So how bout it?

Now this Banker Feller is he some sort of Foreigner or something? I don't mind there little darling but I like keeping my Money in the Good old US of A if you catch my Forty Roger.

You gots any more of them Pretty pictures for me? I Spilled a bit of Special Sauce on the ones you sent me and its a long way to the Quichee Copy. You understands perfectly don't Ya Alice?

Keep yer ears on,

John

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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Capone
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Joined: 16 Feb 2013
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PostPosted: Sun May 05, 2013 8:38 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Turn your CB on if you need more info on your 20.

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oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 6080
Location: All out of Bubble Gum!


PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 11:37 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

If I don't Post these things as a running Bait then I all gets kinda confusing like that Cloverleaf down near Wichita you get my Forty?

Quote:
Alice my sweat heart ,

Done contacted that feller about helping us so the Balls in his court now. You got any more of them nice photos for your man? I'm looking forward to hearing and seeing all of you Darling.


Alice seems somewhat thrilled at John's due diligence:

Quote:
Hi Sweetheart,

I received your message and I'm very happy with you, thanks for contacting the bank manager and i wait to hear from you again once you receive reply from the bank manager so that i can be following up the process to know when my money transfer to your bank account.

I love your effort so much my dear and i can't wait to meet you in your country immediately my money transfers to your account OK. Take care of yourself. Bye


Sadly John just ain't understanding what that Banker Feller is talking Bout:

Quote:
Hi there Little Missy,

I heard back from that Banker Feller and now he says we need us a Lawyer from Senegal. This is getting real complicated like Darling so maybe you could help me out? I'd like to have you on the seat next me real soon like!

I got my ears on,


So I guess Alice was expecting me to do something. Shucks I thought she was taking care of Bidness while I provided Comic Relief:

Quote:
Hi Dear,

I received your message and I’m very happy with your effort. Please I want you to forward me the message you received from the bank manager office so that I can also read the message by myself to know the exactly what they need from us OK. I’m waiting to receive the bank reply from you as soon as possble. Take care of yourself and have a nice sleep tonight. Bye


So I simply sent the Bankers Blah Blah Blah to Alice for her input and ignored anything else cause my Suppers up at the Ralph N Ride. MMM Liver and Onions!

Quote:
Good Morning My Little Asphalt Angel,

I like seeing your pretty pictures and hearing your nice words specially when I'm clear out of Broken Arrow with the Hammer down. I'll keep this short cause I really need to Drain the Hog so I've attached what that Banker Feller sent us.

Forty Roger there Little Missy,



So after ignoring her for a day or so I get this:

Quote:
Hi John,

I was expecting you to keep me update based on your communication with the bank manager so that i can follow up the whole procedures on my transaction. I want to know if you have you receive any reply from the bank manager? Please forward me the reply you received from the bank so that i can know when they transfer my money to your account. I will send you picture tomorrow. I look forward to receive your reply. Bye


And reply I do:

Quote:
Hey there Little Darling,

I am so sorry I thought you was taking care of this. Was I wrong cause I thought you said you'd look into that Feller's Message and splained proper like what the Long Plate Special he was talking of. What you need me to do there my Little road Pizza? I got my Ears on and wants this more than a Bean Popper needs a Fix you get my Teddy Bear?

Gotta put the Pedal to Metal and get clear of this Big slab so so gets back in on my Charlie Forty Roger when's you can,

John


For some reason I forgot the title of a Red Sovine song today and that just won't do! I nearly worked it into my Bait with Alice but Googled it because things just didn't seem right. Mind you 'Phantom 419' does has a nice ring to it!

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 6080
Location: All out of Bubble Gum!


PostPosted: Fri May 10, 2013 12:21 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Playing two or more Truckers is becoming very taxing. Lucky for me these Senegalese are rather impatient:

Quote:
Hi John,

I just contacted the bank manager this afternoon and he told me they received your message and they have replied your message, so why can't you check your email box carefully to see if the bank reply arrived in your box. We should try our best to avoid this long delaying, though i told the bank manager to resend the message to you and he promised to resend it later in the day. Please keep me update as you hear from him OK. I have no pictures yet. Thanks

Alice.


Long delays from a Long Haul Trucker? Not on my Watch Little Missy! So I didn't respond to my Little Seat Cushion but got right down to Business with that Lawyer Feller:

Quote:
Hey there can you help me and Alice out here? I guess according to this Banker feller we need you as our Lawyer. Can you tell me what we needs to do.

I'm on the road now but will try to respond whens I can. 10-4 there Good Buddy,


The response actually made me laugh out loud. You gotta love a Lad with this much gumption:

Quote:
Mr. John,

Please, you can forward me the information you received from the banker feller to enable me know exactly what you need from my chamber. Meanwhile, I have no idea of the person you describe as banker feller, so let this not be childish play because I’m a very busy man. Thanks

Barrister Adam.


Crap I'm always having trouble Splaining myself. Oh well I thinks I can make it right:

Quote:
Aww I'm sorry there Good Buddy,

Here's what he sent me the other day. He seems like he knows you so I just figured you two Fellers were Friends.

I got my Ears on,


With any luck John's Rig will have a few Hogs in it before too long.

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

Jack Boot Mortar Closed lad accounts Tattoo Sand Timer Vcamera Safari Easter 2015 Easter Egg 2013 Whip Whip
View user's profileSend private messageSend e-mailSkype Name
oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 6080
Location: All out of Bubble Gum!


PostPosted: Fri May 10, 2013 11:46 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Alice and the rest of her crew might just have had enough of John:

Quote:
Please get back to me once you hear from the bank manager OK. Thanks


Absolutely nothing from either of the Banker or Lawyer Feller! Dang:

Quote:
Hey there Little Missy,

That Banker wanted me to get in touch with a Lawyer Feller so I sent a message to him yesterday. He seems kinda like he had Peanut Butter in the ears but I smoothed it all over just like I always do. I'm hoping he'll tell us what we needs to do in plain old English cause sometimes they use all these big High Falooting words that just don't make any Copy to me at all. You can help me with all of that though can't you My Little Hose Nozzle?

Well I'd best put the Rig into the Hammer Lane and try not to feed the Bears cause I gotta get a load of Monkey Pickles clear out of Shaky Town. I got my ears on!

John

PS - You ever find any of those pictures for me? I sure would like to see more of my new O.L.

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

Jack Boot Mortar Closed lad accounts Tattoo Sand Timer Vcamera Safari Easter 2015 Easter Egg 2013 Whip Whip
View user's profileSend private messageSend e-mailSkype Name
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