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 Ocean of Emotions

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oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 5884
Location: Learning FF's Pick-up Techniques


PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2013 6:57 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Every morning I wake to four,count em, four messages from my Vlad Lena. Lena never replies to any of my messages but just keeps sending me some rather amusing (although confusing messages). One message usually has three to four photos of a very attractive young woman in a variety of poses and situations. None of these have ever produced a hit from TinEye but I keep looking.

Anyhow here is one message of many:



Quote:
Greetings my love ! I should tell to you, that I have ocean of
emotions
which I had no before. I feel a little lost, when I have no
opportunity to use a computer to read your letter. In my soul I feel
satisfaction and pleasure when I think of you. I never in the life
tried to begin attitudes with the person who is from me far on the
other continent. I also believe, that people which like each other,
should share the ideas, feelings. I hope that you understand, that I
have in view of because it is very difficult for me to transfer you
all that I feel through a computer. I cannot explain why the woman
lasts to the man or the man to the woman. It occurs at a subconscious
level. I feel heat and care in your letters, it forces to beat my
heart faster. With each letter I understand that we become more close
to each other. I want to tell to you that my feelings and words
concerning you always were sincerely. I want that between us there was
not simply a friendship. I want to tell to you that I feel. I have
understood that I love you!!! It is uneasy to me to speak it because I
spoke nobody of it. I LOVE YOU!!! I LOVE YOU!!! I LOVE YOU!!! I LOVE
YOU!!! I LOVE YOU!!! I am ready to speak you these words again and
again!!! And now I understand that it is true love. It I searched for
all life. So to be bad far from you. I want to be near to you. I would
like that you have strong embraced me and have kissed. I want that you
have told that you love me, I cannot live without you. I have
understood that my searches of the man are finished, anybody because I
have you is not necessary for me. I want to begin a life where there
is no place to a deceit. I want to see the world where there are only
you and I and we are happy because we together. Our happiness in our
hands and is very important to estimate it. I shall make all that it
was good you, I shall surround you with care and love. To me it was
necessary to tell to you, I cannot live more than one, I LOVE YOU!!! I
very much want to be near to you!!! To look in your eyes... To
kiss your lips... And silently to whisper: I LOVE YOU!!! I shall wait
for your letter with impatience.
P.S...I have made these photos only for you, I hope that very much
will be pleasant to you.


I have been responding with very generic notes saying things like 'Yeah I feel the same way too!" Resulting in this type of schlock:



Quote:
You - remarkable male! With such male as you, I would agree to
lead all life I know, that it is possible to rely on you, I completely
trust you and I know that such male as you, never me deceive. The
deceit is the most bad character trait of the person, it at all does
not decorate the person! Probably it is interesting to you, why I in
general began to correspond with you? I can tell you only one.
Understand me I can not find male in Russia, which loved me and
respected. As one wise man has told " when we live we are in search,
in search that who can go with you on vital ways, because to one to go
very much and very much Difficultly. " I think what you agree with me?

I wait for your letters and I can tell that they became for me more
than simply e-mail It much greater. I think of you very often and I
recollect all letters which you wrote to me. In them I see many warmth
and kindness. I want to hope, that I am not indifferent to you too. Please
write to me as much as possible, I like reading your letters and
communication with you makes me very happy and I look forward to it. I
shall wait for your answer. Kisses.


Ditto Baby! But wait there's more (much more actually):



Quote:
How you today? Than be engaged? How at you an affair? Has decided to
write to you one more letter. You have received photos which were in
letters? Inform me as to you my photos? They have liked you? To me like
to read your letters. I want that you wrote to me every day even if you
do not have time for it even find to write to me though 2 words that at
you all well and to inform that you write to me letters later. Otherwise
I start to worry.


I respond with my typical 'Guaranteed to melt the panties off the Russian Bride' Speak:

Quote:
God Darnit Lena, you use your tongue prettier than a twenty dollar whore!


With apologies to Slim Pickens for stealing/paraphrasing one of my favourite lines.

I have absolutely no idea what to make of this but it is rather enjoyable. Lena is hinting that she needs to move away from Russia and I am sure this will turn out to be Piles of fun! If I only knew what the heck I was doing....

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ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
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coffinsurfer
Master of Master Baiters


Joined: 03 Apr 2012
Posts: 661
Location: Collinsport


PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2013 7:07 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Have you tried Google's image search? They usually come up with hits for me that tineye doesn't.

_________________
Closed lad accounts x 52 Easter Egg 2013
Sand Timer Joseph (2 years and counting)



Honey I believe you and I trust you sorry if you think am doubting you I never did that bank manager is only just a pissing of crash - Bryan
bcos you for ever in my heart cherished and adored as a priceless pearl among the rear germs - General William Miller
I can't tell of how mush i miss you,this feeling is all over me,i just want you to know that i miss you so mush. - Brian
but my heart is biting so fast for you and i cant hid it - Howard
i pray that God will put smell on ur face someday - Matt Ryan

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oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 5884
Location: Learning FF's Pick-up Techniques


PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2013 1:08 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^I keep forgetting about that.

My sweet words seemed to have worked:

Quote:
to me
Hello my love!! As is glad to see your letters, so it was
pleasant for me to read your letter. How are you? I love you! I see
your smile and it makes me so by a happy internal part! I like to
dream of us with you. I am a person of dreams. I live on dreams. I
dream about The future with you. My sun raises also sets on dreams.
Dreams - all I Have left for lifes. I live during the future. The
future of miracles and pleasures! I hope, that I can live to your
expectations, I - only the person. I always shall be kind and gentle,
But I - only the person who loves you!!! You - the most fine, that are
at me in life. I have found the happiness, and more than nothing it is
necessary for me. I love you!!! I love you!!! I love you!!!

Yours Elena

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 5884
Location: Learning FF's Pick-up Techniques


PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2013 2:45 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I forgot to mention that my Lena invited me to her friend's birthday party but I had to decline. She however has asked my advice on her choice of gifts:

Quote:
to me
Again I write you the letter, I have some minutes before to leave
work. When I worked, as thought, what gift to me to buy to my
girlfriend Anna. I wish to consult to you because you now my second
half and is not present from you any secrets. Can buy to it a kitchen
set is better, she very much likes to cook food, what it will be very
pleasant to it to receive a kitchen set how you think???? I want, that
this gift was from us a two


This just keeps getting stranger and stranger....

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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Not Totally Ignorant


Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Posts: 21168


PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2013 2:58 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

You got a winner Oscar!

_________________
Closed lad accounts 291+ x 78+ http://yahoonews01.zxq.net/
500 in 6 - 36 pink 11 black
Safari Chairman's Xmas Parti 2012
Sand Timer Hana, Flip It, G spot, Rosy, Cynthia
Cellphone - web store
Just read the posting on Eater. You are one sick motherf****r! Smile-Alan
"The skull with bunny ears was a good enough warning" - Nailgunner
mentors- http://forum.419eater.com/forum/cherrie_mentor_program.php
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oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 5884
Location: Learning FF's Pick-up Techniques


PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 9:57 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
Hi my love John! I am glad again to speak with you! By the way,
yesterday I have very well carried out time to day a birth at my
girlfriend. It so liked my gift, that she was very very glad to this.
First we had the good supper and some glasses of champagne, then
played balling also danced. Impressions have remained good, only when
I saw , as some my girlfriends danced With the husband - I had small
envy to them. I thought of you and represented for itself, what you
beside. That you too embrace me and whisper to me on an ear gentle
words. And you , when see around the in love pairs people, -
that recollect me? I would like to ask you, you frequently go the to
friends per day a birth or go for holidays?? I can not live without
you and on this want to ask you: whether you Want mine love that I to
arrive to you. That I was Ms that we two had one bed that at us
the general pleasures and general to mountain that we were the best
pair in the world that all people looked at us and were surprised to
that we the happiest pair in the world full with love and trust! That
your friends looked at us and envied, to that what at you the
remarkable wife that my girlfriends looked at you and envied that at
me the best and beautiful husband all over the world! There can be I
have hurried it conclusions, whether we need to meet and we then we
will solve we wish to be together. But I love you and wished to be
with you. When we will meet, if you refuse me I will back come back in
Russia. If you have possibilities to arrive to Russia I would be glad
to meet you, I could acquaint you with the parents. I of you ask to
think of it as it is possible more seriously, but I think, that these
feelings at us are mutual also we like each other. On it I shall
finish the letter, and very much I wait for your answer, it is
necessary for me to know your opinion of that I have told you.
I shall wait from you for the answer.


In the next three messages Lena decides to visit John in the Yukon:

Quote:
Hello My Lovely Man !!!!! I will soon go to my chief, I will ask
for leave from work that to me have given holiday for some months. I miss you my favourite and I shall love only you.. My lovely prince favourite . I wish
to be yours and to be with you beside..I want you so to inform that I
will go tomorrow morning to tourist agency to learn about trips your
country. I will speak to you about it tomorrow when I will know. I
will wait from you for the answer and I hope that we will meet soon. I
very strong kiss you and I embrace.


Best tidy up the Cabin!

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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Not Totally Ignorant


Joined: 27 Mar 2011
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 10:11 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Maybe we can double date one night while our Vlads are here!

_________________
Closed lad accounts 291+ x 78+ http://yahoonews01.zxq.net/
500 in 6 - 36 pink 11 black
Safari Chairman's Xmas Parti 2012
Sand Timer Hana, Flip It, G spot, Rosy, Cynthia
Cellphone - web store
Just read the posting on Eater. You are one sick motherf****r! Smile-Alan
"The skull with bunny ears was a good enough warning" - Nailgunner
mentors- http://forum.419eater.com/forum/cherrie_mentor_program.php
This Derick moral monster! From http:/ /scamnewss.wordpress.com/2011/10/14/derrick-ratt-scammer-beware/ Vlad blog
http://tinyurl.com/btf7872 - Toolbox
View user's profileSend private messageSkype Name
oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 5884
Location: Learning FF's Pick-up Techniques


PostPosted: Mon Feb 11, 2013 10:37 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^The venue could be changed if it is more convenient for you. I'm sure my In-Laws in Edmund would be okay with it....

@coffinsurfer - Google produced no hits on my Lena either. It's bugging me as she looks so familiar.

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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View user's profileSend private messageSend e-mailSkype Name
oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 5884
Location: Learning FF's Pick-up Techniques


PostPosted: Tue Feb 12, 2013 10:52 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

My Lena looks serious about her visit to wherever the heck I live:

Quote:
I ask about time of performance and they said that there is many
people who wants to make documents and leave the country but if I'll
make the application now, and pay for it now, they will make all
documents not more than 2 weeks, and if I'll not make the application,
documents will be prepared not earlier than two or three months
because there are many people who wants to do it. So that I have put
in the statement at once. I was told that I can go to you when I issue
all documents. My love for trip to you and registrations of the
visa and the passport for travel abroad I need in the following
documents:

1 - The passport for travel abroad.
2 - Medical test.
3 - Consular gathering is paid in addition.
4 -Two photos (5x5).
5 - The insurance.
6 - The information from a place the works.
7 - Documents about the real estate. (a maximum of docks).
8 - The certificate of birth.
9. Consultation before submission of documents in embassy and before
interview.
10 - After submission of documents by us - interview.

Yes, so much I need to prepare documents for my trip for you. I have
been simply surprised in it, but I for our meeting, I will try to
prepare as soon as possible. Tomorrow I will ask for leave from work
that I have had time to make for one day to prepare documents and
after tomorrow to go in tourist firm, to give the documents for a
trip. I hope that you have received this info and you know now that is
necessary for a trip. I will wait from you for the answer.


Betcha that will be expensive.

If you haven't noticed, Lena always says that she will wait for an answer from her loving Prince. She doesn't wait mind you but it is a nice sentiment.

Quote:
My dear
You're always lighting up my heart with the things you do and say. I
feel so happy just being with you this way. You're my my love, and
will forever be my my love. You will always be the love of my life,
and please never give up, always have faith in yourself and you will
gain the greatest gift of all, the gift of hope and love you
righteously deserve. Every time I think of you my heart misses a beat.
You're my theme for a dream! Every moment we share together we grow
closer. I'm simply hanging by a moment, waiting to see you again so
you can hold me so tight that all else fades, I thought after you left
you would fade away from my mind, but still everyday I wake up
dreaming of our time together. I will never forget you. I hope you
still think of me too. I love you with all that I am, all that I was
and all that I will ever be. Please know that my love and I are
inseparable and I would want it no other way and if time could express
my love for you then it's forever and a day, I can't wait to be with
you, see your smile, look in your eyes, feel your sweet touch, hear
your perfect words and kiss your perfect lips. The way I feel about
you some people call it crazy, some call it insane, but I call it true
love
. I so have got tired today that it is necessary for me rest. I
will finish on it this letter and I will wait tomorrow for day. So,
tomorrow I will have very difficult day that I will need to make so
much for my trip.


^My Lena I call it Stalking or complete Batshittery but that is me I suppose....

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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coffinsurfer
Master of Master Baiters


Joined: 03 Apr 2012
Posts: 661
Location: Collinsport


PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2013 7:40 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^^ You just added a new word to my vocabulary...batshittery...love it! Laughing

_________________
Closed lad accounts x 52 Easter Egg 2013
Sand Timer Joseph (2 years and counting)



Honey I believe you and I trust you sorry if you think am doubting you I never did that bank manager is only just a pissing of crash - Bryan
bcos you for ever in my heart cherished and adored as a priceless pearl among the rear germs - General William Miller
I can't tell of how mush i miss you,this feeling is all over me,i just want you to know that i miss you so mush. - Brian
but my heart is biting so fast for you and i cant hid it - Howard
i pray that God will put smell on ur face someday - Matt Ryan

Click here to support 419Eater.com
View user's profileSend private messageSend e-mail
oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 5884
Location: Learning FF's Pick-up Techniques


PostPosted: Thu Feb 14, 2013 1:02 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Nothing much to report today but then again I can't say there has been much to report all along.

I am starting to figure out what My Lena is saying but that could be my Ukrainian Heritage and not Evil Genius:

Quote:
Hi my love John ! I am glad to your message and thanks, that you
understand me.

You are, one of those few people in which I can find understanding.
How has passed your day dear? I shall be happy to pass these days with
you, I want, that to me these pleasant sensations were remembered. I
with such pleasure have woken up today, I think that for me will be
today in very successful afternoon. You are always in my thoughts and
in my heart. I never knew that love could be so wonderful until I met
you. You have given me a new perspective on so many things. I will
always treasure our love and keep it safe. I love you. You are always
in my thoughts and in my heart. I never knew that love could be so
wonderful until I met you. You have given me a new perspective on so
many things. I will always treasure our love and keep it safe. Know
time to me has come to go to do documents for my visa. I probably will
not have time till the evening, probably I will be capable to write to
you only in the evening, after when at me it will be ready documents
for the visa. Therefore, the agent tourist agency has told, that I
came tomorrow and have given all necessary documents. I so am happy
that I can soon see you. I wish to ask you, what mood at you now
when I am going to visit you????? How you think???? I need to know
your feeling to me, your opinion??? I hope tonight to see from you the
answer.


But wait there's more (so much more):

Quote:
Hello, I have just come not for a long time home. That so it is tired
and it is very strongly tired. I so much affairs much have made today
that I do not have forces more. I have had time to make all documents
for my visa are necessary that now I only need to descend tomorrow in
tourist agency and to give full of info to the agent. I very much wait
tomorrow because tomorrow all to be solved. From time to time you ask
me why I chose you? What is so special about you? Well, the reason is
simple. I chose you because you are YOU!!! I have never had anyone
treat me the way you do. I have never had anyone just look at me and
make me feel beautiful. You do that to me! You make me feel special
and wanted. As liberal as I can be, I would never do anything to hurt
you. You mean more to me than you realize. I am hoping that one day I
can prove all of this to you! I want you for you! Well my love. I
shall finish this letter and I shall write to you tomorrow the full
information, that I have learned from tourist agency. I strong kiss
you and I embrace.



I'm pretty sure my next female character is going to be Russian. I can copy and paste until my inner Pushkin is satisfied....

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

Jack Boot Mortar Closed lad accounts Tattoo Sand Timer Vcamera Safari Easter 2015 Easter Egg 2013 Whip Whip
View user's profileSend private messageSend e-mailSkype Name
oscarpiles
Custard Kitty Cat


Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Posts: 5884
Location: Learning FF's Pick-up Techniques


PostPosted: Thu Feb 14, 2013 11:40 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

There comes a time in a relationship where the topic of money rears its ugly head:

Quote:
Elena
to me
I am glad to have again an opportunity to write to you. Yes my dear
it would be very remarkable to visit you soon, and then we could
move after a while to my city if you want it. I from your letter have
understood, that our meeting with you soon to happen. I am very glad
to this. Dream last night has dreamed me, that I shall see you. I
already went in travelling agency. This small bureau, as at us small
city. But it is travelling agency has communications with the basic
travelling agencies in the nearest big cities so it is reliable and
safe. I signed with them the contract. In conformity with the
contract, the agency will prepare me for all documents for travel. I
have received all necessary information, and now I want to inform it
to you under the order, for what I need to pay:

1) The passport for travel abroad is required to pay is 165 American
dollars / 3960 roubles.

2) The visa will cost is 165 American dollars / 3480 roubles.

3) Medical inspection is 80 American dollars / 1920 roubles.

4) Services of our travel agency is 110 American dollars / 2640 roubles.

5) I had at myself of a few money, I have already paid this money for
other documents is 100 American dollars.

I can arrive to you when I shall make payment for the visa and in 10
days I receive the visa and I can arrive to you. I have been very
surprised by the prices of my trip to you, I did not travel for a long
time already so far from the city. But I was not frightened from it
because I am assured that I can visit you that for me there will be no
problem, many say to me that very strong woman. Tonight I will go at
home and I will look, how many for me still is available money to pay
for these documents. I will inform you tonight.


Well that was easier than I thought. It looks like My Lena has everything in hand. Wait a minute you don't have all the money? But, but...

Quote:
My love, it I again write you the letter. I have for you very bad
news. I do not know as you it is all explain, I thought that I will
have money for my documents but when I have come home that I have only
150 american dollars, but I should pay this money for the Internet and
as will go on products, my wages will be not soon. I today asked on
work in loans of money that I could pay, but to me have told cannot
give. That to me will not allow. At me very small salary that I have
no additional money I thought that could pay and so to borrow money,
but it has appeared very bad It's make me little suppressed and
disappointed I don't have so much money. I was make application but I
must pay for it. I asked my mother about our savings she said that the
money should not be a barrier between two people which love each
other
. I asked my friends about helping me and they said that have not
at the present moment. I asked the advice my mother and she said that
maybe you can help me because you loves me???
? I have overlooked to
inform you, that it is necessary for me to make payment is 520
american dollars. I do not want to speak it, but I want to ask you,
whether you can help me, can pay in agency of 520 american dollars???


My new Mother-In-Law is special ain't she?

So Lena has the 'Agency' get in touch with John but unfortunately it ends up in his Spam Folder. Lena doesn't know this Tidbit as of yet but I'm sure she will find out in a while. I might as well leak it to the Gentle reader:

Quote:
Hello Mr. John
Our travel agency "suntur" welcomes you
We want to acquaint you with the present contract made between ours
tourist agency "suntur" on behalf of General director Vasilev Genadiy
Petrovich and our client Elena Davydova.
We also want to inform cost of service for official registration of papers necessary for travel to you:

That our client Elena Davydova could arrive to you to it it is necessary there will be some documents:
1. The questionnaire - 5 $
2. The passport for travel abroad - 200 $??
3. A x-copy of all pages of Russian passport 5 $
4.2 Color photos 3,5 * 4,5 - 20 $
5. The information on the firm form from a place of work (with the
instruction of essential elements, addresses, phones, and also a post
and the salary, signed by the general director or the chief accountant) - 240 $
6 consular gathering - 50
Now we want will inform that the total cost of service to cost 520 $
We want to ask to ask you you are going to help our client Elena Davydova with documents?
Inform us concerning the help that we knew what to do further

We work with people many years
Our agency reliable and safe

Phones of office
+7 Blah
+7 Blah

Our address of e-mail: [email protected]

Operating time:

Everyday lives: 10:00 - 19:00
Saturday: 11:00 - 16:00
Sunday: 11:00 - 16:00


I have been reading the above as 'Everybody Lives' until I highlighted it. Oh well....

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oscarpiles
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 16, 2013 2:29 am Reply with quoteBack to top

For the first time My Lena sent one message and no photos:

Quote:
Hello my dear and loved!
I am very glad to receive from you the letter. How are you doing? Thanks
for that that you have answered me the letter. I want to inform that I
need in money for the visa in 520 $? You inform me can help me with the
visa 520 $ whether or not?? I should know it. Also I want to inform that
I already started process by the visa and from all documents. Also I
want to inform that I all over again should make necessarily the visa
and then only to think about the ticket. You understand me be relative
it? Concerning cost and I for the present do not know the ticket. I
should make the visa all over again. Whether I want to tell that inform
me as soon as possible you can help with the visa whether or not? I
finish on it the letter and I shall wait from you for the letter. I wait
from you for the letter as soon as possible. Your Elena.


Good old John realizes that something is awry:

Quote:
My Lena,

I just found the message from the agency in my Spam folder. I'll read it over in my spare time. Hope you are having a great weekend.


If I were a betting Man/Woman I would take Lena in the Buff for a Hundred Bucks.

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 18, 2013 1:01 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Lena keeps pecking away at John:

Quote:
Hello my love!
I am very glad to receive from you the letter. My love I very much that
you speak me that want to help. But I also would like to learn more in
detail when you can help me with money? Which number can send money for
the visa? I simply want to know how many to us with you still it will be
necessary to wait
. I very strongly love you therefore I want to be with
you as soon as possible. Write to me please the answer to my question. I
shall wait it from you. Your Elena.


Same here Baby! So the 'Agency' appears to be on the scene:

Quote:
Hello Mr. John
Our travel agency "suntur" welcomes you
We have received from you the letter. You informed us in the letter that
you wish to help our client Elena Davydova. we to you we want to inform
that you should send money for our client Elena Davydova for its name
through the western union. I send you the information how to send money
to our client through the western union. This information:

Name: Elena
Surname: Davydova
Country: Russia
City: Orel

You should send money 520 $ through the western union addressed to our
client Elena Davydova. when you will send in the western union to you
there should inform concerning 10 confidential figures (MTCN.) that our
client Elena Davydova she could receive from you money should know all
this. Also she should know your full him and your full address. I hope
you of us have understood? If you will have to us questions write to us
the letter and we shall try to help necessarily.


Naturally John has all sorts of questions but the 'Agency' answers them all:

Quote:
Hello Mr. John
Our travel agency "suntur" welcomes you. we have received from you the
letter and have decided to answer you at once.
We want to inform you that the Western union the fastest and most
reliable way of transfer of money. I hope you of me have understood???
We in the last letter have briefly and clearly written all to you as to
send through the western union


Now who could argue with that?

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 18, 2013 11:27 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Good luck with this one. I can't describe it so here you go:

Quote:


Yours the Girl!!!!

I want To fall asleep in your hands to wake up from your warm breath.
To sit, having drawn in under themselves legs and to look, how you prepare.
To look film, having put a chin to you at a breast.
To inhale your smell, such fresh and warm, was absorbed in your neck.
To take you arm, leaving on street.
To fall asleep, having put a head to you on knees and feeling as you of
fingers drive to me on a back.
To go with you along the street, a hand in a hand, sometimes compressing
fingers that you to me have warmed them.
As the cat to compress cams, sticking nails in to not scratch you.
To examine your smile in dream, a silhouette your such children's the
person, your such correct nose and kind eyes with long eyelashes.
To approach and embrace you, having felt as you kiss my hair.
Costing beside to feel, how you will strong - strong be pressed to me
because it is tired, and all complexities to us are easier for passing
together.
To nestle a cheek on your cheek.
To feed you with an orange from hands.
To listen, as you are squeezed breathe to me in an ear.
To blow at you that you have turned and has kissed me.
To lay under your hand, choking, but not daring to be stirred to not wake you.
To wake up from your kiss, such gentle, warm and morning.
Recollecting you to feel, how grow cold the end of fingers.
To know, that under your vest there is a secret known only to you and me.
To be confident that between us never there will be another.
It be simple cannot. I know.
To fall asleep in your vest, feeling your smell.
To die from tenderness, falling in your embraces.
I want. That. So. Was. Always.
Yours the girl!!!!!!!!!


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* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 12:03 am Reply with quoteBack to top

"To fall asleep in your vest"?
Is there room?
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next victim
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 1:03 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I think I'm in love with your poet!

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 10:45 am Reply with quoteBack to top

To lay under your hand, choking..." I was fine until I read that. Ahh, the visions...

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 11:29 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I guess we could describe this as the day the poetry died. My Lena probably couldn't find anything in her vocabulary to rhyme with 'Money':

Quote:
Hello my love!
I am very pleased to your letter
I am simple in the seventh sky with happiness, that you speak me about the help with the visa
I want to inform you that money for the visa 520 $ you should send through the western union for
my name Elena Davydova.
I send you the information how to send money through the western union for my name.
This information:

Name: Elena
Surname: Davydova
Country: Russia
City: Orel

I to you have already told that money 520 $ for my visa you should send for my name Elena
Davydova through the western union
When you will send money in the western union there to you, should inform concerning 10
confidential numbers (MTCN).
That I could receive from you money, I should know these 10 confidential numbers MTCN.
You should send it to me in the letter.
Also that I could receive from you money I also should know your full name and your full address
I hope that you have well understood me.
The western union very fast and easy way of transfer of money
I finish on it the letter and I shall wait from you for the letter.
Write to me as soon as possible. I strong whole and very strong embrace you. Your Elena.

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 12:45 am Reply with quoteBack to top

As luck would have it, my Muse has returned with some much needed Verse:

Quote:
I love you, indefinitely, madly!
Where you were, what you did, let my love stores you...
Thanks you for you!!!
For your force, your wisdom, your beauty!
For that, due to you I believe that there are in the world Present men!
For that with you you feel the Present woman!
For that up to you I did not know, that such the Present love.
Your smile as mad happiness, I cannot present, if you have presented me all attention, my heart
likely simply would not sustain from an overabundance of feelings!
You - as a cloud of happiness which is unattainable which is simple above you and do not leave
you even in a sunny day.
My heart did not know still so strong, bright and improbable feelings.
I - would like to be your breath. I - would like to be a beam of the sun which rushes into your
room
I thank you that has presented me wings of love, happiness!


Okay so not exactly Iambic Pentameter but better than I've been getting:

Quote:
My love I also wanted to ask you concerning the help with the visa. You
to me have told that will help. I also wanted to learn when you can help
inform me please???? When you can send money for my visa?


Oh yeah the money. I always forget something:

Quote:
My love I want to inform you that money it is necessary to send through
the western union!! You understand me?? My love you know the information
how to send money through the western union. I to you sent all to the
information how to send.


Best look for some Fine Russian Bacon I suppose:

Quote:
My Lena,

Are you sure that is the only option? I have never used such a service and hear that they can be used by unscrupulous elements like Hippies and Scotsmen! If you could find in your enlarged heart to give me your Banking information, I am sure this will come to a pleasant climax.

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2013 11:04 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Obviously my kind words had some sort of effect on My Lena. Please don't ask me to explain this:

Quote:
hello my love!
The love is a drug
Today having woken up in the morning, I have understood, that "drug" has taken upwards, and that
it is more without a small portion in day, at one o'clock, per minute, I simply shall not live.
This that feeling when in elements of pleasure and if not you constantly are required to be, I
never would test this not clear to me a condition. In the beginning of ours with you of
attitudes I very much would like to glance to you inside, to learn what you?

But the more deeply I learnt you, the more strongly to me wanted to shout, shout for fear, to
shout with happiness, to shout and call to the aid from a magnificent condition in which being
immersed, I could not see myself, hear myself, but only unconsciously to understand that to me
very well, and that I test that is impossible to describe words is it is possible to feel only.
All this, I have named love.

In fact the love is a drug. Firstly I had euphoria, ease, feeling of full dissolution. Next day
I want still. For that moment I have not had time to be involved yet, but the sensation was
pleasant to me, I was sure, that at any moment I can do without these fine feelings.

I thought of you two minutes and overlooked at three o'clock. But gradually began to get used to
you and has got in full dependence on you. And then I thought of you three hours and overlooked
for two minutes. If you were not a number I tested the same, that the addict, the deprived next
portion of a potion.

And such minutes as the addict who for the sake of a doze is capable to go of a robbery, on
murder and on any humiliations, I am ready on all for the sake of love. I did not stop and I
shall stop before what and who cannot overpersuade me to go back.

If the person though time tried an elixir of love to not get rid any more of it, it remain in
blood. And that I do all, I shall do, all reminds me of the first drop of love which has got in
my blood together with you. Pursues me everywhere, follows me, until then while I do not feel
completely devastated and helpless. And only then I turn around back and I understand how many
tortures mixed with pleasure I could go through. Therefore I so strongly LOVE you


I just read this again and now I have a Roxy Music song going through my head. Oh well better than anything by Vanilla Ice I suppose...Wait a minute...Crap!!!!

_________________
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I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 7:49 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Go on please , I am having a good laugh over here Very Happy
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 22, 2013 11:58 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^I'll do my best but Lena is getting a bit more 'Business' oriented:

Quote:
My love I understand about what you to me speak in the letter. But I to
you once again want to tell that money it is necessary to send through
the western union. The agency does not accept any bank translations! You
understand me. Money it is strictly necessary to send through the
western union. Do not worry concerning safety that the western union
also safe. My love I want to tell that you did not worry concerning
safety all it will be good. Do not experience about it. Do not worry
about money and if will send money I to you I promise that I can receive
your money quickly and without problems. My love tell to me when you
will send money for the visa?? I want to know it? Inform me please
number when you will send money that then I could tell in agency him
when you will send it. I finish on it the letter and I shall wait from
you for the following letter. I strong whole and very strongly embrace
you. Write to me as soon as possible. Your Elena


For those keeping track at home, My Lena only mentioned Western Union three times. The word money wins out with five appearances....

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 3:24 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Yeah l'm back with the Dreaded Double Post! Say it ain't so? Sadly it is true but My Lena has something to say:

Quote:
My love! Would like to name you my prince, whether I can name
so??? My Prince
, I love you more with each day Yesterday I saw
fantastic dream about us with you. I think that you would like to hear
it: I had a wonderful dream of us together. We were walking in the
gentle waves of the water at the beach. Walking hand in hand kicking
sprays of water on each other. We walked for a long way and then you
lay to my down on a soft blanket away from the waves. I began to kiss
you very gently on your lips, then I kissed every exposed part of your
lovely body. Then we slowly undressed each other and began to explore
each others bodies with our hands and mouths. The moon was shining
brightly and you soft skin glowed from the moistness of my kisses. Our
skin was on fire for each other and we made passionate love for hours.
We lay on the blanket and looked at the stars as we held each other in
a warm embrace. We saw a shooting star and made a wish together. Our
wish must have come true because we once again gave in to our feelings
for each other and began to make slow and wonderful love to each other
again . When we finally were so tired from all of the wonderful love
we had made we noticed the sun was beginning to rise above the water.
We watched the sun rise from the darkness until it beamed all of its
wonderous light upon our still unclothed bodies. I slowly put your
clothes back on you and then dressed myself , you then picked to my up
and carried to our room. We both fell to the bed from exhaustion. I
hope you enjoyed my dream as much as i did. When I woke from sleep I
wanted so badly to hold you in my arms for real and I was upset very
much that it dream. I shall wait your letter I love you
I love
I love
I love
I love
I love
I love
I love
I love YOU!!!
Your Elena


So what have we learned here? Well let me tell you: OP will no longer be known as the three minute man! Spread that rumour around please????

Actually this Dream would have been so much better if Lena made her Prince a Sandwich!

_________________
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
I do not want to be associated with occult and blood sucking organization,i was told that you are not a man of God but an occult leader with 666 sign. - Elvis
Until thy kingdom hell of stupidity thy come!!! - Sarah
I AM GOING CRAZYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Bobby/Jenny/Jugs/moneyp**
ufffffffffffffffffffffffff - Outlander
F*ck you ass all – Jerry Asshat
i am a good lad i have told u that many times - Kevin the Idiot
You need home training lol - Brian LaLadyBits

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Joined: 20 Feb 2013
Posts: 13
Location: flying around on my broom.


PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 6:04 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Laughing well , ask her if she into the sandwich-thing or .....you did have a dream aswell ........
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