Epic Safari Time! (The Three Unwise Men)

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Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2012 1:24 am

Three unwise Ogas and 7 foolish Lads will each celebrate this Christmas with a bitter taste in their mouths and massive dents in their bank accounts.

Since February this year, The Monsignor and yours have been operating a shuttle service for UK pilgrims between London and Plymouth. We have now 9 lads who ended up in front of our beloved Rame Head Chapel!

This is one of them:
http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=221996

However, The Christmas saga needs to be epic, so Dr Mike joined the bait to inflict maximum lad damage.

Little did we know, we ended up with 7 greedy lads traveling from London to the Chapel at the same day Mr. Green

In fact two of Mike's lads slept in the train and landed in Pembroke, Wales!
They're back now to Plymouth and stranded in a hotel till tomorrow.

Let me start with the appetizers. Dr Mike and The Monsignor will serve the main course!!

Here is Dr Hilary, a leftover from this thread:
http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=1779150#1779150

He wants to give me zillions of the UN dollars. For some odd reasons, he replied to that ASEM after one year?

After a few emails, he sent this:

Quote:

Attention: G. James,
Below is the contact person whom i have successfully made arrangement with to come and see you tomorrow morning.
NAME: MR. KANE ******
TELEPHONE: +44783*******
EMAIL: ***********
Call me immediately you get my mail and also call him.
I wait to hear from you
Sincerely,
Dr Hilary B**
3 Whitehall Court
London, United Kingdom
SW1A 2EL
United Nations (UN)
Tel: +4477********

Nothing better than three greedy lads and their oga!

Kane and his two guymen have landed safely :
https://soundcloud.com/epic-safari-time/kane-is-lost

Things turn bad, and the idiots didn't like the Chapel.

Here is the oga's email:

Quote:

Dear Monsignor,
I am not happy at all about the move of this transaction. My representatives were at the chapel today and he keep calling you but to no avail. Now, you were telling me that there are so many chapels there. how do you mean. Was that the arrangement. Do you realise that money , time and life is involved here. How do you mean to disappoint this arrangement.
Now i want you to know that i am only but doing all my best possible and working in the favour of G. James as he has explained to me about his health situation and that is the reason why i am doing my best and working so hard that he get his fund transferred into his account by Monday next week. Now you say he should come back to meet with you again by tomorrow, this is not possible at all.
I need G. James's to call me from the hospital as immediately as possible for discussion so we can conclude this immediately.
Tell G.James to call me and you can also call me on my direct line below.
Acknowledge my mail as i wait to hear from you for further update.
Sincerely,

Dr Hilary B****
3 Whitehall Court
London,United Kingdom
SW1A 2EL
United Nations (UN)
Tel: +4477****

This is the call:
https://soundcloud.com/mr-pricky/hilary-ben-to-monsignor-15-dec Laughing

Edit: Christmas version!!

Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2012 6:55 am

Quote:

It stressful:

Yes, most safari's are Laughing

Lad should not have fell asleep on the train. Other wise he may have collected. Cool

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 21 Nov 2012 Posts: 619

Looks like fun, can't wait for the updates.

Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2012 8:21 am

Quote:

All is not lost. Send him back next week.

Quote:

Send your man back tomorrow

Quote:

It's stressful!

Poor laddy - oga gonna make him sleep in the barn with the goats after falling asleep on the train & missing the mugu gold.

(unless that's a priviledge)

Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2012 12:10 pm

Where to start this thread...perhaps by saying that yesterday was one of the most rewarding days in my baiting career, and a huge thanks to The Monsignor for the effort he put in to helping me and Dharma, THANK YOU.

There are or where three set of lads, the ones that Dharma posted earlier is the first set of lads to arrive, and according to themselves there where three of them. These clowns was not the ones i baited so i will not elaborate any further than Dharma already has.

The second set of lads (two of them) was a gang of trunk box lads, they have been with me for two years and are connected with this lad that recently traveled to Abidjan to meet Toilet bike Mike. And when i say connected, i mean that they tried to chop that lad. And now at last they both got the same reward, a nice safari. They where going to the chapel from London, but allegedly all the way from Nigeria to collect some 8,750€.

The third set of lads (also tow) are gold lads that went to the chapel to collect a whopping 210,000$ and as a consequence they are hugely motivated.
But lest us take them in order.

The trunk box lad's oga from Nigeria and they sent a bloke called Peter Smith. He came to the chapel by car and by the time they arrived i assume that they whether was rather foul, at lest judging by their reaction. Cause he told me that was seeing the antenna, then i heard him go outside the car as the wind picked up. Then he walked for some time and then he saw the chapel, then he started to cry.

"I cant go there, i can't go there"

Sadly this was an in call and there is no recording. But they then left the chapel. And to explain to you the tremendous stupidity of this, they went all the way from London, an four hour car ride (they did claim that they went all the way from Nigeria so that is what i will use when with the oga.), and when they are in sight of the destination only 500 meters away, they turn away. I called them 10 minutes later and if you think that their tone was scared, that is nothing to what they sounded like on the parking lot.

http://www.4shared.com/mp3/hDyC5km_/Alois_speaks_to_travelling_lad.html?

I later spoke to the oga revealing my huge disappointment to him and then i wrote him an angry letter.

Quote:

Hello Mr Obi. I have no words for how disappointed i am in the men you chose to send to meet me.
They went from Nigeria to London, and then onwards towards Plymouth and the chapel where i was to meet them. This i assume they where paid to do. And when they after going all the way from Nigeria came to the parking lot outside the chapel some 500 meters away from it they refused to go any further. I spoke to Peter Smith and he said "I cant go there". This strike me as very odd and very unprofessional. Why would they refuse to do this when they are paid to do it. When i then spoke to Mr Goldsmith he told me that he said to him that he had could not find the place, something that was a lie.

So have to ask you Mr Obi what kind of persons i am dealing with here. I thought you ran a professional team of men here. But what happened here today made me wonder. Are you capable of delivering my consignment box if i pay the money, or will the person delivering that turn away outside my door too?

Another thing that bothered me was the fact that Goldsmith told me that the deal was for me to come to London. Why would he say that, the deal was never for me to come to London, and Goldsmith should have known that.

Now i want to ask where this is going. Goldsmith asked me if i wanted the consignment delivered to Sweden, and i would want that. But you also need to understand one thing. My opinion have always been that i will not pay anything upfront, not a single dollar and your men's behavior this day have made me more sure than ever that this is needed.
So if Goldsmith want to send someone to Sweden he need to make very sure that he send someone there to pick up the fee too. The actions of today have made me quite upset. I came from Sweden to meet your men and they went away at the door to where i was. I saw them from the window. And you and Mr Goldsmith can tell me all you want that i have to meet them at the parking lot, but i do not do 8000€ deals in a fucking parking lot, Neither do i have very much sympathy for men that are to lazy to climb a hill.

The third safari, which is still ongoing, will be updated some time later today, But i can tell you that that one was the most entertaining by far. A saga of stupidity that ends with the lads going to the wrong country. Those of you who know UK geography know that it takes quite a lo(s)t to go from London to Plymouth and end up in Wales.

To be continuted...

Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2012 6:54 pm

I was lucky enough to listen to this as it was unfolding and it was incredible. The lad who fell asleep on the train is guaranteed a kicking from his boss which is all to the good. The pangs of conscience in the chapel car park are a thing of wonder, maybe doing a fraud in a church was a bit much or perhaps it just looked like an impossibly dangerous climb. In any case, a really good day on the tools, well done to all Very Happy

Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2012 9:24 pm

Update time.
When the third lad was approaching Plymouth he came by train instead of by car. Before he left he seemed a bit slow at start. This was annoying but i still felt that he would come. He said that he was supposed to come with the 12:09 train from Paddington in London. All well and good. But he never arrived with the train that was supposed to arrive at 15:06, at least he never called. This was due to the train being late, something which is apparently common in the UK. This made us somewhat disappointed as we planned to have him put in a taxi and speak to the driver to confirm the safari this way. Some time after the train had arrived we got a call from the lad, this was a desperate call and he said that he had missed the station due to the fact that he was sleeping. This was of course hilarious and we told him to exit the next stop stay there till we can solve this. Next stop away from Plymouth is Liskeard. Then the lad went quiet for half an hour and we thought that the lad never traveled or dead or something.
And as all the other lads was on their way home by this time we thought that the third safari was a dud, so only i was online when i got a call from Steven where he said "i am totally lost.

I told him to take it easy and to find out the place he was in and text me, and this is what i got back.

Quote:

Am in pembroke am lost.Pls call me

And to show you the magnitude of his fuck up let me show you this map.

In face he was 10 kilometers closer when he was still in London compared to Pembroke, not to mention he ended up in the wrong frakkin country. Smile

Not only did they fall asleep on the train, they fell asleep on the WRONG train. And i did some checkup. The train from Paddington to Plymouth departed from platform 9 at 12:09. And the train to Pembroke departed at 12:46 from the same platform. So what i think happened was that the Plymouth train ran late and they was told this. But the departure platform was also changed so not to interfere with the Pembroke train departure. This little detailed was missed by the lads and thus they saw a train arrive at platform 9 and they boarded it without questions. An epic fail.

In this call TM told the oga about this tremendous fuckup. This was before we knew that he was in Wales, but only knew that he had missed his stop. The oga's response when it dawned on him the magnitude of his lads mistake is a classic

Quote:

...onbelievable

https://soundcloud.com/mr-pricky/peter-lamtey-to-monsignor-15

This was even more hilarious and i got to speak to a taxi driver in Pembroke that confirmed the location. This was to good to be true. The lad still had a 210,000$ motivation though so he simply took a UK taxi some 390 kilometers, i have no idea what price for that was, but i assume hundreds of pounds. But i did made sure that he had money to pay, i would hate a taxi driver be stiffed on a journey like that, and he wasn't. A huge congrats to that driver that got to make quite a few £'s yesterday.

Some three and a half hours later he finally arrived. That is when TM called him, and once again we asked to get to speak to a Taxi driver and send him directions to his doom, and also to get more confirmation on his location. This is the call.

http://www.4shared.com/mp3/bpuVD4ay/TM_speaks_to_taxt_in_PLY_10_13.html?

Off to Liskeard, and do not when TM made sure to make it a single trip. Once in Liskeard he was told to wait for TM's character Sterling. And so he did or rather they did, as they said we at one point and it turned out there were two of them. And they waited for some time and then they got on a taxi to Plymouth again. They called me at Liskeard and i told them to wait a bit longer. But when looking at the time line form when they left Plymouth to when they came back and seeing that the taxi ride took 20 minutes it is highly unlikely that they waited for more than 10 minutes

Some time later TM called the oga Mr Lamptey and TM's statement at the four minute mark really says it all.

Quote:

They got the wrong train and they fell asleep. That gives you an idea of what sort of men they are

http://www.4shared.com/mp3/7Bt-DOey/TM_speaks_to_Laptey_11_26_PM_S.html?

At the exact same time that TM was speaking with the oga i spoke with the lads. And they asked me if they should go back to London or if they should find a hotel in Plymouth. Needless to say, i opted for the latter.

The lads stayed the night.

Later they where told that Sterling had service until 12 the next day, church goes first. When we called them this afternoon that were still at the hotel. Sadly enough they refused to go anywhere without knowing where, so we never got to tell the taxi to take them further down Cornwall. Instead the lad got pissed and shouted at the Sterling. And moreover, they told us that they had the 10 kilos of gold i intended to buy. But this was a lie, we asked the oga where to gold was and he said that it is still in London. The poor fuckers couldn't even keep their stores straight. They made every mistake in the book.

-Took the wrong train.
-Fell asleep on said wrong train.
-Ended up in the wrong country
-Waited for only 10 minutes when they finally made it to the right place.
-Lied to the victim.
-Got caught with said lie.
-Refused to meet the victim the next day.

You all know that we pin everything that go wrong on the lads. Well in this case we were right in doing so. These lads where truly morons and i cant think that the oga is very pleased with their performance.
We fully intend to blame this disaster on the lads. Just like i did with the second set of lads on this safari.

And in that case it actually worked. This morning i got a call from Mr Obi and he said that he fired the lads that turned around at the chapel parking lot. He now want me to meet one of his guymen in Switzerland. This could be fun.

Three safaris on one day between Me Dharma and The Monsignor is a good days work. And this day gave me number 25 & 26. Halfway to the magic 50

Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2012 9:43 pm

This is incredible baiting. I love how you don't even have to slap the lads for their mistakes, because the oga will do it for you. Very Happy

Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2012 3:12 am

Big X wrote:

This is incredible baiting. I love how you don't even have to slap the lads for their mistakes, because the oga will do it for you. Very Happy

Absolutely. Any time you can get them in-fighting is a WONDERFUL day for us. And for the victims.

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 21 Nov 2012 Posts: 619

How are you confirming the first two safaris? It sounds from the phone calls that they aren't lying about their surferings...but then they are lads.

Switzerland sounds nice Very Happy

Nice work all.

Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2012 10:42 am

Those were confirmed in a similar way, when at the chapel we had them pass the phone to a person in the coast watch station that are situated next to the parking lot. But those were in calls so they where not recorded.

And i also got this letter from Mr Obi, the second lad's oga. And he is putting the blame for this debacle solely on the lads.

Quote:

Your message confirms how furious you are because of the unprofessional character the diplomats exhibited over the release of your consignment to you. I am not happy too and I have reported to the head of the diplomats here in Nigeria. I even gave them the copy of your mail and the director of the diplomats is not happy over their attitude to you. He further apologized and confirmed that he will immediately ask them to come back to Nigeria. And now we are using another company that can be able to handle the delivery perfectly. I want you to know that the officers that came and attend to you fail to remember the money they use for expenses belongs to the company.

For this reason, the director in charge have already suspend them and give sack letter to them as well, we hard a long time meeting with the new company today and every arrangement has been properly put in one accord, because of all those character that’s why we did not allow the diplomat to know the content of the consignment.

I want you to know that the new company that’s in charge have appoint another new officers that will be coming to Europe to attend to you this new week, and the will be coming to Zuries Swaziland (he means Zurich, Switzerland), and they will arrive on Tuesday being 18th to arrive on 19th, I will let you to know that they company mentioned their requirement delivery charges that you will use to come to Zuries Swaziland for the clearing process, now you will go along with the sum of 14,900 €(he clearly want me to pay for his guymens trip to Plymouth or the new guymen want more cash). you will use the stated amount to come along to meet with them one on one, I want to show you that I am difference than others for you to know that you are dealing with an honest man, I hereby attach a copy of my id card to you to proved to you that I am innocent in this aspect, please do not blame any person for what happen okay.

All I want you to understand is that those people work with another organization, please let us move ahead for this new development so that you can confirm the consignment and show me appreciation of what you told me earlier on, I have pass your information to them, they will call you as soon as they arrive Swaziland, I am promising you everything will be perfectly done by special grace of God

It was not my intention that things will go this way (i know, but it was mine), but as a man who knows what he want, you have to accept everything in good faith knowing fully well that good things does not come easily.

THANKS

And this is this nice letter came from Steven, the lad that spent the night in Plymouth with his aggressive friend.

Quote:

bob
i have taken the fotos, but am finding it very hard to use the computer in my hotel room so i will look for an internet cafe around the area and will ask them to do it for me but the buyers in plymouth are thiefs and i believe they have plan to take the goods off me they did not have the decency to even come to my hotel in plymouth knowing that i ve come all the way from africa to london and then to plymouth. i will show the goods to your man tomorrow if i meet him.
greetings
steven

He is still hurting. Very Happy

Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2012 11:48 am

Great stuff, Excellent.

Actually there may well be a town in Swaziland called Zuries Wink

Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2012 12:47 pm

Yes, but i spoke to him asking, and he confirmed that it was Switzerland, not Swaziland. e have tried for the Swiss angle before but his guymen backed out. I hope that doesn't happen now.

Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2012 5:49 pm

^ I know some wonderful places in Switzerland, if you need any help please let me know.

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2012 1:57 pm

All I feel I can usefully add to this Thread is some recognition. On the day, 3 separate lots of Lads (7 in total) in 3 separate Baits were all Safari’d to the same area. Is this a record? It may well be.

A combined total of well over £1000 GBP will have been spent by the 3 Ogas and their 7 lads. They got HURT that day.

One group of Lads didn’t actually reach the Chapel, as they got the wrong train from London and ended up in the wrong country! (Wales). They did eventually make it to SW England, where they were sent on a long and tiresome nocturnal wild goose chase.

This was a stupendous, amazing joint effort by Dharma and Dr Mike. The time, dedication, skills, and efforts required to achieve 3 individual Safaris to the same area on the same day are immense. I am proud to have played a modest part in a day’s Baiting that I will never forget.

Extraordinary. Simply extraordinary. bow_down

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2012 3:12 pm

this is really beautiful work. Having been to the chapel in question myself (NOT safaried by the authors of this thread, I must emphasize) I can hardly think of a better destination for lads.

And the side journey to Wales, what a fantastic combination of circumstances. That is just really astounding and gives you all sorts of leverage.

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2012 3:22 pm

Thanks for the praise, but to be fair, we had some help and also one set of lads was actually set on going two days earlier but didn't make it that day.

Now when the lads are home safe and sound some of them still try to get their money.
Steven and his aggressive friend, the ones that went to Wales sent me some photos of the gold with my name on it once they got back to London.

They did this to prove that they had the gold with them in Plymouth. And as i said, this they did while in London, don't ask cause i cannot see how they could prove the gold was in Plymouth by sending a photo from taken in London. But anyways here it is.

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2012 5:40 pm

^ I take it that you are now a total believer?
That looks 100% risky free gold to me.

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2012 5:58 pm

Whats with the curtains with the Latin inscription. Looks like extract from the bible. Is this taken in the back of some holy Jeans shop? (holy jeans, get it )

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2012 6:23 pm

I think they sell them in Dunelm and similar inexpensive shops. This, the boxes piled up and the almost-a-wardrobe lead me to believe he is not living the guyman dream just yet. Given his performance at the weekend I feel it will be a long time coming. Good luck selling your bag of sand Very Happy

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2012 6:26 pm

He claim that the photo is taken at his friend's apartment.

I am a 100% believer in him now...not. And sadly the oga seems to have taken the side of the smallboyz, apparently it doesn't matter if he sent a bunch of incompetent fools to collect the money, it is still me that is taking the blame for this shit in his book. Odd really when you think about what they did.

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2012 2:42 am

Dr Hilary (the oga of the three stooges) was a bit tempered when he was explaining his guymen's agony in the Chapel.

I accused the Monsignor of this disaster and demanded another meeting. This time I will be in the train station myself. He got really pissed off and hung up .
https://soundcloud.com/epic-safari-time/dr-hilary-is-angry

He thought I will call him back or send him an email, but I let him stew for a while.

As expected, the smell of cash got the best of him and he crawled back like a good pet Laughing

After a few calls, he sent this:

Quote:

Attention: G. James,

I have made another arrangement I need you to reconfirm to me the direct telephone for which my representative will call you with. Now go ahead and get a mobile phone today and get back to me with the mobile number but meanwhile you shall be called by me and my representative with your hospital room number 442******* (it's not a hospital number, it's a UK landline from Skype!) . You are to go ahead today and withdraw the 11,000 pounds and by tomorrow you shall meet with him in person at the train station.

Call me immediately you get my mail.

I wait to hear from you

Dr Hilary **

Another fool in the move Thumbs up

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2012 7:23 am

LOL He is going to go ballistic when nobody turns up. Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 10 Oct 2003 Posts: 4747

Thanks for your and everyone else’s work on this safari, this is right at the top of my list.

These guys are lucky, not only do they get to visit a foreign country they get to check out religious architecture. Checking out churches should be at the top of every “Christians” list.

You’re making everyone happy!

I am responding so I can keep track of this.

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 21 Nov 2012 Posts: 619

"that's ... that's ... that's ... bullshit!"
-Dr. Hilary

nice work, you can hear some genuine lad pain in there.

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