Firing lawyers

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Posted: Thu Jul 19, 2012 1:00 pm

Am I the only one that regularly fires several lawyers through the course of my bait? I'm currently on lawyer number 2 with my current bait and he's already treading on thin ice. Here's how his predecessor was relieved of his duties -

Quote:

Dear Barrister Fox,

Good news...well, for me at least - you're fired!

Barrister Fox, never in my life have I had to deal with such an incompetent, useless moron of a Barrister. Time and time again I have emailed you asking for advice and time and time again, you've tried to spoonfeed me bullsh*t so that you didn't have to do any work. Well , not any more.

I mean "YOU SEND YOU ID TO THE BANK"? Seriously? Is that the standard of grammar I should expect from a top flight Barrister? Honestly, I have a friend who works at the zoo here in London and he could teach a monkey to spell better than that. Is that the case, Barrister Fox? Are you more stupid than a monkey? I demand an answer! Perhaps you should consider changing your name to John Chimp, it'd be more fitting to your personality. Actually, that would be a slur on chimps.

Now, you can go and ruin other peoples business deals but I have asked Mrs Sachon - who, in case you've forgotten is dying with cancer - to find a new lawyer. Failing that, I will get my own lawyer involved and have him sort out your mess, you utter dipstick.

I hope your office soon goes out of business, but I'm sure you're more than capable of sorting that out for yourself.

Good riddance, you muppet.

I'm going to try and reach ten over the course of this bait. I'm only 3 weeks in and already they're way off script to the extent that the dying widow has made a miraculous recovery from terminal cancer in order to have to act as a referee between me and the lawyer.[/quote]

Posted: Thu Jul 19, 2012 1:18 pm

Gaz wrote:

Good riddance, you muppet.

Thanks... spit my coffee on my cat

Maybe you should hire these muppets instead:

I'm gonna be laughing all day long when I think of that...