Craziest/Stupidest thing you've ever written to a lad

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Posted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 8:52 am

Makes my mom laugh everytime I say the line "Now I have to type with a hotdog in my mouth".

I'm looking for the original emails, I'll post them as soon as I dig them out.

Edit: Here's a variation on the them that I had forgotten about. Love lad.

me wrote:

Vivian,

I'm sorry to say, but the pictures didn't come through. Could you resend them? I hope they have some skin!

The weather here is bubbly. Seriously, it's so hot that I want to run monkey through the streets! Simply unbearable!

The local beaches are shut down too, due to a jellyfish invasion. They're washing up on shore and turning the beaches to snot.

I'm very excited to see pictures of you, so please try sending them again. The beaches are a major part here, so I hope you're
comfortable wearing a bikini. It's the main outfit of females your age around these parts.

Anyway, get back to me Vivian my vixen.

Didn't hear anything for a while, so i sent this:

me wrote:

Vivian, My dear,

I haven't heard from you in some time, my love. I do look forward to seeing your or the bazongas with you. I do hope you are okay,
like a snugly wrapped burrito in a porcelain alter.

I am doing alright but I recently survived a terrorist pterodactyl attack. It cost me 3 arm, and I currently have to type with a hot dog in my mouth.

The jelly fish attack is being driven off the beaches, that are now covered in snot.

I managed to get two tickets to my favorite band, the Sauerkraut Yodel Spankers. I got the extra one for you. I hope you'll go with my to the concert.

Waiting with custard in my eyes for your reply

Apparently Vivian didn't like me talking about my problems.

Vivian wrote:

THIS IS ALL ABOUT ME
My Dearest
How are you today and your environment Hope all is well with you
Mine is a little bit hot over here in Dakar Senegal.In this camp we are only allowed to go out only on Mondays and Fridays of the week it's just like one staying in the prison and i hope by Gods grace i will come out here soon.

Selfish little biatch, ain't she?

It's a theme I like to use a lot, but I need to cut down on my characters. sorting through 15 accounts sucks XD

Posted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 11:51 am

I've sent some weird shit to lads - but the weirdest is probably this bait...

Posted: Fri Mar 09, 2012 6:52 pm

Benjamin_Franklin wrote:

Last year I was in a weird mood so I wrote to a lad while acting as if I were inside a bomb shelter, something like the vaults in the video game Fallout 3, and were under the impression that nuclear war had broken out.

That would be an awesome mass bait to try. Total panic all over the lads. Maybe.

I think the craziest thing I've sent (recently) is that I'm in a cult requiring a puppy sacrifice. The bait is still going, and the lad doesn't seem to mind...

Baiting Guru Joined: 10 Oct 2010 Posts: 3877

reminds me of the zombie massbait

people from all over the world wrote to the lad, starting with straight baits. then, they reported about accidents in laboratories, creating zombies. these zombies spreaded, till every character had experienced zombies.

Posted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 1:55 am

I had a hit lad once, he wanted $$ to save my life. I said I didn't have it, because my beloved dog was suffering from third ear disease, and I needed to find a surgeon who could help remove the third ear. The dog was very dear to me, and I had $$$$ to spend on the dog, but if the hit lad killed me, well.

Instant love lad. Good times. Laughing

Not quite a Newb Joined: 19 Nov 2010 Posts: 69

Nothing too bazaar, but right now I'm in the middle of having my character get turned into a robot by an evil mad scientist for the government. Half the messages I put out are in binary.

Quote:

Greetings. Information received. 01001001 00100000 01010011 01000101 01001110 01010100 00100000 01010100 01001000 01000101 00100000 01001101 01001111 01001110 01000101 01011001 00101110 00100000 01010111 01001111 01010101 01001100 01000100 00100000 01011001 01001111 01010101 00100000 01001100 01001001 01001011 01000101 00100000 01010100 01001000 01000101 00100000 01001101 01010100 01000011 01001110 00100000 01011011 01011001 00101111 01001110 01011101 00111111

Not quite a Newb Joined: 24 Jan 2012 Posts: 72

The funniest I've seen so far was written by Jose_Cuervo..seriously it amazes me that the lads could actually fall for this lol

http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=83468&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=0

Lads milking?!?!?! a bull? Wow. This is the sort of story that makes me wish we could get an update from the lad a month or so after the bait so we could know what happened to them afterwards. After all the head lad who convinced his friends to participate in this must have had a hard time afterwards..

Posted: Sat Mar 10, 2012 1:35 pm

I'm currently baiting several Senagal refugees as Gozzalgub the Annihilator, an alien emperor whose spaceship is currently en route to landing on and invading Earth.

Quote:

GREETINGS HUMAN FEMALE

OH HOW MY LOVE FOR YOU GROWS EVER PLENTIFUL AS I READ YOUR ELECTRONIC MESSAGES.

IT MAKES ME SO VERY MOURNFUL TO READ OF YOUR PLIGHT. I ASSURE YOU, WHEN THE ZORGAS EMPIRE HAS TAKEN CONTROL OF YOUR TINY, DEFENSELESS PLANET, YOU SHALL LIVE LIKE A QUEEN.

HOWEVER I CANNOT ASSIST YOU IN THIS IF WE ARE NOT JOINED IN A PAIR BONDING. IT IS A SIMPLE PROCEDURE, VERY SIMILAR TO WHAT YOU HUMANS REFER TO AS MARRIAGE. IF YOU WERE TO BE PAIR BONDED WITH ME, MY LOVE, THE ENTIRE EARTH SHALL BE YOURS FOR THE TAKING.

FROM YOUR FUTURE MASTER,
GOZZALGUB THE ANNIHILATOR, EMPEROR OF THE PLANET ZORGAS 6B AND THE PITIFUL ROCK EARTH

Master Baiter Joined: 04 May 2007 Posts: 187

I just responded to a "confirm you are dead" scam by confirming I am, in fact, dead and communicating via mediums. He may have dropped me, though; in which case I'll try again until a lad goes for it.

Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2012 7:39 pm

Inspired

Elite Baiter Joined: 19 Jun 2011 Posts: 1066

I once baited a gold lad as an alien who desperately needed to consume mass quantities of gold and convert it to fuel before returning to his home planet.

Of course, after reading crotcheecher's example, I'm feeling downright normal.

Baiting Guru Joined: 10 Oct 2010 Posts: 3877

Flippy wrote:

Nothing too bazaar, but right now I'm in the middle of having my character get turned into a robot by an evil mad scientist for the government. Half the messages I put out are in binary.

Quote:

Greetings. Information received. 01001001 00100000 01010011 01000101 01001110 01010100 00100000 01010100 01001000 01000101 00100000 01001101 01001111 01001110 01000101 01011001 00101110 00100000 01010111 01001111 01010101 01001100 01000100 00100000 01011001 01001111 01010101 00100000 01001100 01001001 01001011 01000101 00100000 01010100 01001000 01000101 00100000 01001101 01010100 01000011 01001110 00100000 01011011 01011001 00101111 01001110 01011101 00111111

is your message just numbers, or is there actually a meaning. you could tell him, that every block resembles one letter. you could write the message to him with a normal text editor, and via search and replace you could form the message. maybe there is a translator available too. then laddy has to spend a lot of time deciphering your mails.

Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2012 10:53 pm

01011110 01001001 01110100 00100000 01101001 01110011 01101101 01100101 01100001 01101110 01101001 01101110 01100110 01110101 01101100 00101110

Flippy, did you type in all caps intentionally?

Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2012 11:52 pm

I once told a lad who wanted my phone number that I lived in a cabin on a mountaintop in Arkansas with no phone or running water. I told him the nearest phone was at the general store at the bottom of the mountain. He could call them and leave a message for Buren von Messerschmidt the store clerk to go across the street the post office and ask the postmistress Bernice Wapsipinicon to pass me a message on her next mail run. I got two messages in my Google Voice account of the lad stumbling over those names before he dropped me.

Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 3:08 am

TheDane's bait from the space ship he posted above is probably my favorite. Of course lads milking bulls is funny and odd as hell too.

Most of everything is absurd in the Shorty bait but we get away with a lot since he has been baited so long. Two things stand out though. One was while on the phone with Shorty a Bishop was trying to perform an exorcist on Lucy and then he jumps out the window comiting suicide all the while I was narrating for Shorty on the phone as a recording done by Bo's husband played. I couldn't believe Shorty bought it. The other was when Bo's charecter was rescuing Lucy by flying to the hidden location on a jetpack.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 24 Jan 2012 Posts: 72

Still can't believe you convinced several adults to milk bulls of all things and they not only did it but took lots of pics too because they weren't humiliated enough. I have a 5 year old daughter who buys less shit from me lol.

I haven't found the "shorty" bait yet but if its as good as the bull milkers then its worth a read.

Has anyone done a ghost bait?

Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 1:50 pm

@Bravo: The Bishop was a "Level 65 Cleric", no less. What gets me is Shorty doesn't think those two events merit inclusion in his movie script. Mad

Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 2:31 pm

vonpaso xlura wrote:

I thought it was a mountain or a bird at first, but it's a sentence! ¿Qué tal, Pepe, toca te algo?

I know "etxea" means "the house" and "maite" means "dear"; what's the rest?

Aitor, Maite and Beñat are First names (Maite means dear and Aitor is the equivalent of spanish Víctor, i.e. "Vanquisher").
I don't really know what do these surnames mean, they are either from friends of mine or from basque politicians.

Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 1:05 pm

I like to insert random words into some of my responses:

Quote:

Listen to what I am saying. I have been twice so no I will not go back. The receipt is attached again. Your staff make a mistake. Go get your fee then send my darn clown money. You go to get it and we done after sending my money.

Quote:

Thank you sir. I acknowledge your moo receipt of my email. When will the transfer of my money take place

And so on....
This is obviously done after afew emails have taken place and is simply for my amusement. No lad has noticed yet.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 27 Jan 2010 Posts: 36

DeProfundisClamoAdTeDomin wrote:

The http://www.upsidedowntext.com/ and http://speaklolcat.com/ have opened up a whole new world of torture for me and my poor lads Cool

TY for that!

Damn skippy! Twisted Evil

Not quite a Newb Joined: 27 Jan 2010 Posts: 36

Robert Heinrich der 1. wrote:

It better be strawberry! Twisted Evil

Not quite a Newb Joined: 27 Jan 2010 Posts: 36

[quote="Kariko"]

Benjamin_Franklin wrote:

I think the craziest thing I've sent (recently) is that I'm in a cult requiring a puppy sacrifice. The bait is still going, and the lad doesn't seem to mind...

Please tell me there have not been any puppies sacrificed for this one! Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2012 1:06 pm

I sent this as part of a reason I needed documents from my lad. I honestly thought he would twig. He didn't.

Quote:

Without proper documentation we would go to jail. We would go directly to jail. We would not pass go. We would not collect our money.

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 01 Feb 2010 Posts: 90

Called the lad a monkey once he knew that I was baiting him. Smile

Posted: Mon Apr 02, 2012 1:06 pm

My Chinese Robot baits Very Happy

http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=170709

http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=183931

http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=182560

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