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 Working on an album, need help with lyrics

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BookReader
Master Baiter


Joined: 17 Mar 2011
Posts: 198


PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 3:31 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Right, here's the first one ... This is a rap I wrote called Hitlad. I don't really write rap, so I hope everybody likes it.

Checkin' the spam folder and what do I see?
A guy who's threatening to kill me.
His script is in caps and written poorly
And goes into detail about the stuff he'll do to me.
I respond and say "Hey let's be sensible about this, would you accept some money?"
He writes back and says "oky dorky."
He says Western Union is the way to go
I say that of this place, I do not know.
"It's a money transfer thing."
"Oh yes, a bell that does ring."
"Send me the money in four hours or you're dead."
Being a baiter, I use my head
And send him a form.
He writes back with it filled out - this is not the norm.
I write back and reality begins to sink
In he filled it out with the wrong bloody ink.
This goes on and on
He keeps talking about his boss named Ron.
Then finally the game's done,
His email is dead and gone.
Then one day I get something from the same guy
To that old hit bait a reply:
"You go to hell.
[Signed] Sincerely, Dave Chappelle"


NOTE: My adding of well-known comic's name Dave Chappelle does not represent any lad I have ever baited, nor have encountered. (I felt like I should just let that be known.)

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crotcheecher
Agent 003-1/2


Joined: 26 Jul 2009
Posts: 421
Location: Skullcrusher Mountain


PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 3:54 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I'm not used to rap, can't stand the genre personally, so I may be off on this. The pacing seems a little dodgy though. However, a bit of RATM or Run DMC type beats and I think we can make this work. I especially love the part about the wrong bloody ink XD

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BookReader
Master Baiter


Joined: 17 Mar 2011
Posts: 198


PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 4:03 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Haha, actually I hate rap too. Wink I was just having trouble writing stuff earlier, so I thought I'd try it. Yeah, you are right about the pacing.

Are parodies of other songs okay, as long as they're about baiting? I'm more used to parodies, so that's a bit more up my alley.

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"I can see you are an illetrate, can you tell your mother to fill the form for you?"

"we really need to be talking on phone 24/7 to get this done"

"Please stop speaking like someone who is not matured here."

"am from Bristol London a professional Haired Killer."

"We are in similar age and we need to buy an holiday home once business go smooth."

"I WILL SPARE YOUR LIFE BECAUSE IT SHOWS THAT YOU ARE TRULY
INNOCENT AND TRANSPARENT"
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crotcheecher
Agent 003-1/2


Joined: 26 Jul 2009
Posts: 421
Location: Skullcrusher Mountain


PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 4:07 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I'm willing to do parodies, but I can't release them as part of the official album (legalities, you know)

But you know, those epic rap battels of history I actually enjoy a lot. The music in them is usaslly quite good and the "rapping" isn't annoying at all! So naturally, I would like to see a scambaiter vs a scammer Twisted Evil I think we know who would win.

But if you wanna make it a duel rap like that, I got a rapper on hand....

BTW, let me try to fix the pacing a bit...

Checkin' the spam folder and what do I see?
A guy who's threatening to kill me.
His script is in caps and written so poorly
And goes into detail about what he'll do to me.
I respond and say "Would you accept some money?"
He writes back and says "Well, okay"
He says Western Union is the only way to go
I say that of this place, I really don't know.
"It's a money transfer thing."
Then a bell starts to ring,
How silly of me to forget such a thing!
"Send me the money in four hours or you're dead."
Being a baiter, I start to use my head
And I send him a form, fifty pages long.
He writes back with it filled out - it's all wrong.
I write back and reality begins to sink
In he filled it out with the wrong bloody ink.
This goes on and on and on
He keeps talking about his boss named Ron.
Then finally I realize that the game is done,
His email is dead and the lad is long gone.
Then one day I get something from the same guy
To that old hit bait a reply:
"You can go to hell.
[Signed] Dave Chappelle"

Whatcha think, a bit better? Try it with a run-DMC meets DEVO twist...

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BookReader
Master Baiter


Joined: 17 Mar 2011
Posts: 198


PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 4:13 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Right - that's what I thought. I'll work on some writing (parody, rap, and song) in the coming days and post it.

Those are epic rap battles are pretty good! Einstein v. Stephen Hawking is a favorite of mine. There's a great economics one out there between F.A. Hayek and Keynes.

I love that idea! Perhaps we'll have to think about a rap battle ...

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Closed lad accounts x4

"I can see you are an illetrate, can you tell your mother to fill the form for you?"

"we really need to be talking on phone 24/7 to get this done"

"Please stop speaking like someone who is not matured here."

"am from Bristol London a professional Haired Killer."

"We are in similar age and we need to buy an holiday home once business go smooth."

"I WILL SPARE YOUR LIFE BECAUSE IT SHOWS THAT YOU ARE TRULY
INNOCENT AND TRANSPARENT"
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crotcheecher
Agent 003-1/2


Joined: 26 Jul 2009
Posts: 421
Location: Skullcrusher Mountain


PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 4:15 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Hawking vs Einstein is MY favorite one! But I'm a total nerd...

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Phil Yerboots
Elite Baiter


Joined: 29 Oct 2009
Posts: 1342
Location: Back in Asena's sandbox


PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 9:17 am Reply with quoteBack to top

RATM, Pixies and Devo?

Now those are my kind of influences. Sounds like you have your guy already on the case but I'll write something today and post it up for everyone to point at!

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Phil Yerboots
Elite Baiter


Joined: 29 Oct 2009
Posts: 1342
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 1:21 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Just this so far. Not sure whether it's useful or useable but you might be able to pick a bit of meat off the bones. Definitely needs some serious chugg.

I am the Eater
I have the power of ten
Thousand
Women and men
Eyes that see the evil in your black and twisted hearts
I am the sum of all your fears
And the sum of many parts

You want my ID?
Well my ID is shopped!
You want my dolla?
Well my dolla is chopped!
You want my bank account, my telephone, my passport, my address?
You think that I’m a mugu?
I’m a baiter – I confess.

My money transfer’s phoney and my credit card won’t swipe
While you’re dialling long distance I am talking on the Skype
You think that you are fooling me?
You think that you can’t lose?
Well look again my scammer friend
At twenty thousand views

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crotcheecher
Agent 003-1/2


Joined: 26 Jul 2009
Posts: 421
Location: Skullcrusher Mountain


PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 5:26 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

That's seems to have Dave Mustaine written all over. Which is good, I love Megadeth Very Happy I'm thinking of going with something similar to "Addicted to Chaos" or "Blood of Heroes" for those lyrics, and I'll have to mold the lyrics a bit, but I think it will work!

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Not Totally Ignorant


Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Posts: 21168


PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 5:44 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Throw some "Dime Bag" in there. The man could play.

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crotcheecher
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 6:12 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Aw come on! Mix Megadeth with Dimebag? That's a deadly combination, man. I think everyones' heads would asplode.

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Not Totally Ignorant


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 6:27 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Mugu's from hell could go Gold!

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crotcheecher
Agent 003-1/2


Joined: 26 Jul 2009
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 6:28 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Gold? GOLD? How dare you! I will not settle for anything less than myrrh!!!

BTW, extra credit if you get the reference.

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Not Totally Ignorant


Joined: 27 Mar 2011
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 6:36 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

At this time of the year, I'm going to have to say that may be an unfair play on the field. I hope the refs banish you to the walk though the Cemetery Gates!

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crotcheecher
Agent 003-1/2


Joined: 26 Jul 2009
Posts: 421
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2011 6:38 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Meh, the cemetery gates have been locked ever since those cowboys showed up.

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Brainiac
Elite Baiter


Joined: 15 Feb 2010
Posts: 1338
Location: On the side of a volcano


PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 4:15 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Hello crotcheecher, Phil, next vic, and Bookreader,

Morgain Le Fay told me about this thread. Can I get in on this ??

I haven't done too much baiting this year but I've been an Eater alumnus
since Feb. of 2010.

But more relevant, I'm a professional musician. That's all I do. Can I be
in the Eater band? Let's discuss. Phil, those were great lyrics. They did have
a Megadeth vibe. Anyway, I will send crotcheech my contact details via PM.

Also, as far as lyrics writing I suck more than a Kirby vacuum cleaner.

But I play multiple instruments. And I found a lyricist in Aus. Jan. of this year.

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I am Christian and not a heathen as you mentioned
I am an FBI Agent and I work 24hours of the day.
You are playing with my intelligence.
You are making a fool of me. I am not here for joke. ---------(FBI agent Fred Owen)

You are so stupid...are you kidding yourself or are you insane? -----(hitlad "Dirty" Sanchez)
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bearkat419
Baiting Guru


Joined: 25 Jun 2007
Posts: 3516
Location: Houston, Texas


PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 4:45 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
I had a lad translating AC/DC's Highway To Hell into Igbo language
Someone owes me a new keyboard for that. I just spewed beer all over this one Laughing

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crotcheecher
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Joined: 26 Jul 2009
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 7:18 am Reply with quoteBack to top

@Brainiac: The more the merrier! I replied to your PM. My apologies on the delay, my buddies' birthday is today and his car gave him a busted valve stem for a present Razz

@Bearkat419: I've sent you a new keyboard, but it's stuck in customs.... Twisted Evil Other than that, yes, having a lad translate AC/DC to Igbo was quite entertaining. I might have to record that, but I'm a horrible singer. So lets make a lad do it for us Very Happy

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Brainiac
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 05, 2012 6:11 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Merry New Year crocheecher and everybody !!! Very Happy

It's 2012 now and we've been in contact re: the Eater band and the Lad-song.

Just trying to revive interest in this thread in the new year.

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United Kingdom Nigeria


I am Christian and not a heathen as you mentioned
I am an FBI Agent and I work 24hours of the day.
You are playing with my intelligence.
You are making a fool of me. I am not here for joke. ---------(FBI agent Fred Owen)

You are so stupid...are you kidding yourself or are you insane? -----(hitlad "Dirty" Sanchez)
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Brainiac
Elite Baiter


Joined: 15 Feb 2010
Posts: 1338
Location: On the side of a volcano


PostPosted: Fri Jan 06, 2012 11:36 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Well, I've recorded the song using music from crocheecher and the lyrics
by Phil Yerboots, which, cosmically fit exactly to the music though he had
never heard it.

Getting ready to send to croche by e-mail. We will review and I'm sure
he might want to post it up at the file-sharing site, mediafire. The place
where I grabbed the chord progression from.

^^ To BookReader, I couldn't use your "Hitlad" lyrics, but maybe the next one.
If I can get another tune from croch, I could use your words.

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Closed lad accounts x19 (in a year) Closed lad accounts x18 (Tsunami tscammers in 4-days)
United Kingdom Nigeria


I am Christian and not a heathen as you mentioned
I am an FBI Agent and I work 24hours of the day.
You are playing with my intelligence.
You are making a fool of me. I am not here for joke. ---------(FBI agent Fred Owen)

You are so stupid...are you kidding yourself or are you insane? -----(hitlad "Dirty" Sanchez)
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crotcheecher
Agent 003-1/2


Joined: 26 Jul 2009
Posts: 421
Location: Skullcrusher Mountain


PostPosted: Sat Jan 07, 2012 2:13 am Reply with quoteBack to top

First listen of the song sounds great. The vocals are a bit muffled, but the music part turned out absolutely BEAUTIFUL. It has a bit of a Dweezil Zappa sound to them. Anyway, I'll be uploading them to mediafire and posting a link soon.

And we'll start working on the next song shortly Very Happy

Thanks, Braniac! Thumbs up

Edit: Here's teh demo of the first song! Clicky here!!!

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Cougar
Elite Baiter


Joined: 16 Apr 2009
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Location: Curled up on the doctor's chair.


PostPosted: Sat Jan 07, 2012 9:31 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Ok, so apparently this is what my brain comes up with at 4.30am when I've had no sleep and experience a sugar-rush from eating too many Smarties. Laughing Could be useful, could be inane rambling. I'll let you decide. Wink (Did finally get some sleep, hence the delay in posting...)

LOVE LIES

You came out of nowhere, a stranger on the line
A couple of emails and you want to be mine.
You say you want to love me, and together we'll grow old
But all you'll ever really want is cold hard gold.
You say colour doesn't matter, that our true love is blind
Guyman I gotta tell you, I know what's on your mind.
Your poisoned tongue, your empty words, I knew right from the start
You had no qualms or fears about ripping out my heart.

Love lies bleeding, love lies dead
Our true romance is in your head.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust
Your little game just turned to rust.

So tell me of your problems, now you think I'm yours
Of how you can't escape, trapped by your wretched shores.
Your family are poor, feel pity for your plight!
And just one simple payment will make it all come right.
Our lives are bound together,marriage is on the cards
Except you can't afford to pay the visa charge.
Our love is strong, our love is true
but no MTCN is making you blue.

Love lies bleeding, love lies dead
Our true romance is in your head.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust
In this game there is no trust.

Your payment hasn't come, so you up your little game,
Questioning our love, claiming I'm to blame.
I tell you that I'm sorry, I tell you I repent
when for the 15th time to the Westy you've been sent.
Your bank accounts are closed, you're chopped by Mr Gomer
Face the truth 'my love', your fraud attempt is over.
An SSC safari makes you stredded offline
Justice is sweet, revenge is mine.
Your empty heart, your shallow soul,
is mourning your nefarious goal
to tear asunder all I had - you'll never win, and of that, I'm glad.

Love lies bleeding. love lies dead
Our true romance has been put to bed.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust
Your game is up. You're done, dead, crushed.

Embarassed

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crotcheecher
Agent 003-1/2


Joined: 26 Jul 2009
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 07, 2012 6:51 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I like! Very poetic and smooth. Cougar, do us all a favor and eat more Smarties, while staying up till 4:30 AM!

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Cougar
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Joined: 16 Apr 2009
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 07, 2012 8:07 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Christ no, my body couldn't take it! Not to mention my cat being annoyed cause I kept waking her up. Laughing

Glad/relieved you like it. Feel free to mess with it as needed.

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Big Al
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Joined: 13 Dec 2011
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 07, 2012 10:07 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I'm shamed by talent beyond mine......(Big Al)
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