The Art of Felching

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Posted: Tue Sep 13, 2011 3:11 pm

I've got a lad with the usual "box full of cash waiting to be transferred to your account" scam. I've decided to take him on and rather than waste time, get right down to the business of asking for a trophy. If he comes up with the goods, I'll take it from there, if not, my effort has been minimal.
I have to acknowledge Shiver Metimbers as the author of the basic outline of this opening email...it was taken from his "Edith has a Fetish" bait as I couldn't think of a way to get the trophy request right in at the start. I hope he doesn't mind. I've modified it hugely though to give it the slant I wanted...you can see where this one's going, can't you!

Dear Mr Lucas,

My apologies for taking so long to reply to you. I did not notice your email as it was unfortunately addressed to my mother who recently passed away. My name is Roger Jiml@d and I run a business buying and selling the work of aspiring 0oung artists that specialise in the depiction of felching: A long lost agricultural skill concerning the hand-tying of hay bales which was common in the British Isles until the advent of the Industrial Revolution around 1820. I am interested in your proposal, as my Company has been in something of a decline recently as my mother had diminishing capacity as she faded into decrepitude and I’m afraid the old girl ran the firm into the ground...in short, I could do with the money so I consider your approach to me most timely. However, since we cannot meet in person at the moment I will have to ask you for some sort of proof of your identity as there are many scams around these days and I would not wish to put myself, or what is left of my Company, at risk. I am afraid that a passport or other official identification will not be suitable as such things are easily forged. I am sure you understand, as a businessman yourself Mr Lucas, that I cannot take chances.
I suggest that we chose a distinctive phrase, and then you have a photograph taken of yourself holding a sign with that phrase written on it? That way I can be sure that the person in the picture is indeed you.
I am afraid that without this proof of identity I would be unable to proceed. Do not send any photograph, however, until I have decided upon an apposite phrase that reflects the nature of my business.

Kindest Regards,

R0ger Jiml@d
Managing Director
The Art of Felching
76 Trombones Avenue
London EC4 7AH

Baiting Guru Joined: 27 Mar 2011 Posts: 21158

I lost one of my lads going for it right out of the gate, but I wish you luck on getting yours.

419Eater is my life Joined: 29 Dec 2006 Posts: 370

I tried and tried to get a lad photo holding a "I Love to Felch" sign but it just never happened.... believe it or not it was easier having them get tattoos. Very Happy

Posted: Tue Sep 13, 2011 4:41 pm

If this works I'm going for a tattoo on my next bait!

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 06 Sep 2011 Posts: 5

Any update on this yet mate? I'm eager to see if he complies or not Very Happy

Posted: Wed Sep 14, 2011 4:18 pm

PHRASE:

"Always say excuse me after you have felched"

Posted: Fri Sep 30, 2011 7:11 pm

I got a trophy several years ago with a lad holding a sign that says "I love fluffing"....(if you don't know what a fluffer is, look it up...the answer will be NSFW).

I look forward to your (hopefully) trophy.