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 I'm in trouble now...

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Elite Baiter

Joined: 19 Apr 2008
Posts: 1224

PostPosted: Fri Jul 29, 2011 3:47 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Make sure that Mr Mueller delivers whatever he is charging for in person. It is amazing how much time the head of the FBI/Homeland Security has to act as a glorified errand boy.

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Dr Mike
Baiting Guru

Joined: 14 Jun 2010
Posts: 3260
Location: Due north

PostPosted: Mon Aug 01, 2011 11:25 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I can see it played out before me:

Gimli swung his axe and downed yet another orc. As blood gushed from the wound in the orcs throat Gimli could see Legolas in the corner of his eye, and he knew that he would have to work hard with his axe to keep up with the elf's skill with a bow. 24 thus far, this was tiring work, and even though some of the orcs were easier to dispatch of then the Easterlings and Southrons it was still not easy. Especially when they came at you together. He ducked from another spear and knocked the orcs face in with the butt of his axe, not a lethal kill, unless you had a spike there. This Orc was done as well, 25.
That’s when he first noticed it, the great creature. High as a tree and with tusks that it could sweep away the brave riders of Rohan at will. The Pellenor suns reflected rays gleaming on the iron spears wielded by the men on its back. This was a challenge worthy the son of Gloin.
And if he could get one of these he could argue to the elf that this one was worth at least 10 men or orcs, and that is not counting the men on its back. This was his chance to get in the lead. As Gimli swept the right leg of an orc he started to move towards the beast. 26?, yes that one would have to count as well. It was not like he was going to do much fighting with one leg lying on the ground, he couldn’t very well start biting at peoples feet now could he? Gimli ducked from an orc swinging his sword at him and ran forward, leave the orcs for the elf and the men of the north; he had bigger pray on his mind.
When coming closer Gimli realized that he had a bit of a problem. The beast was truly enormous and with his short statue and axe he could do as much damage to it as a one legged orc lying on the ground. But just as he thought that, the solution came to him. It was so easy that he smiled to himself; he would win this silly game with the elf now. He was sure of it. Gimli was almost close enough now, just a few more meters and he could… he suddenly fell on his knees and he felt an excruciating pain radiating from his back. A spear? Arrow? No he had been shot before, this was something entirely different. He could no longer control himself now and he fell further and rolled over on his back, arched it and screamed for the top of his lungs. Praying to the Valar that no one would see in the degrading way he was slain. He could also hear a voice speaking.”I got him Agent Johnson, I tased his fat ass, he is down. Hogtie him and we can bring him out of this mess. Mr Mueller will be pleased with this catch. He’s been thwarting us long enough.”
Suddenly the pain stopped and Gimli made a move for his axe which he had dropped on the ground beside him. But even though the pain was gone he could barely move. Hus muscles would not obey him. He could not reach the axe beside him, not to speak of grab it get to his feet and use it on these men clad in black. He was rolled over on his belly and his hands and feet where fettered together. A black cap was put over his head and everything went dark. The last thing he heard before he was unceremoniously dumped in some kind compartment was one of the men speaking again.
"Money laundering and now this. He must have killed over 20 people over there"
"25, I counted"
"Well this will be the end of his spree, he will fry for his heinous crimes."
Then Gimli heard some kind of metallic noise and everything went quiet.

This will make the arrest of King Arthur seem like a amateurish game in comparison.

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