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Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 8:30 am

I was gonna edit in her reply, until I actually GOT it! In all caps (and two Yahoo thumbs up smileys), I get this:

Quote:

HEY I JUST NEED TO GET THE MONEY PERIOD IF NOT STOP SINCE HE IS DIED NO HELP
ANY MORE

I'm definatley going for that piggy, Chris DIED for you biatch! Albert send her the confirmation she's been waiting for:

Quote:

Dear Ms Scamalot,

After my meeting with my superiors this afternoon, it has been decided that if you agree to follow the Photographic evidence article I sent you this morning, your brother's bank account will be acceptable. For your benefit, here is the article again:

http://yahoonews.mailnew.com/

As I have mentioned in my earlier email I will need a photograph of yourself holding a sign saying . That way, we will not only know that you are who you say you are, but it also shows that you are complying with our firm's requests. This will aid us to expedite your transfers.

I look forward to receiving your photo.

Albert

I need a new Avatar Wink

Posted: Tue May 10, 2011 7:43 am

So, I get two emails from scamette. One claims to have a photo of her brother (but doesn't have an attachment), the other has this:

Quote:

i can see u want to black mail me well byeee i dont need your money ok byeeeeeeeeeeee how can i give you my accout nop way am nothaving whills i have not see ur face ok byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee dont contact me the man i was inlove with you said he is died so live me alone please ok have a nice day
scammers

dont write me any more OK
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
till dirth

The bottom part in a MUCH larger font. Albert is of course happy to send her a serious slap:

Quote:

Dear Ms Scamette,

I have received your emails and read them with great interest. You 1st email says you have sent a photo of your brother, yet there is no attachment on this email. If you wish to play games Ms scamette, then I suggest you buy an Xbox. This is a law firm Ms Scamette, please remember that in our dealings.

Perhaps I should make myself clearer on this matter, Ms Scamette. I am trying to help you in this matter, yet you continue to throw hurdles at me. It is not in my interest to "Blackmail" you (as you put it). I have the money, it is my JOB to get it to you, you seem uninterested.

It is disheartening that you believe the firm to be internet scammers when in fact we are just trying to prevent you from being scammed yourself. I would point point out that it is YOU who requested the money be sent to a different Bank Account and not us. We are simply trying to make sure this money goes to the right person. We use signs here at all the time, in fact I was holding one wishing you the best in the photo I sent you. You did read the Yahoo article I sent you, didn't you? I send the link again for your edification:

http://yahoonews.mailnew.com/

You say that you have not seen my face yet AS REQUESTED BY YOU, I have sent a recent photo of myself to your email address! Did you not open the attachment? I cannot be held responsible if the equipment you are using to access the internet is substandard. I have sent the attachment to my friends,, and not one of them had a problem opening it. You ARE using a Macintosh aren't you...

As I mentioned earlier, it is my job to get this to you as mentioned in the late last will and testimony and I will continue to perform my duties to the best of my abilities. Please setlle down and stop acting churlish. I have worked very hard to curtow to your requests Ms Scamette, and hopefully this matter will be settled soon. After all, I am due to retire soon, so I can spend more time with my family

Albert

Posted: Sun May 15, 2011 4:49 am

Okies, I get a pic (presumably of our lad), with the following. No sign of a sign though, I suspect a slap is in order:

Quote:

thanx for your help
ok
here is my brothers pic ok that is all ok am waiting

Will edit in a reply later. And here it is:

Quote:

Dear Ms Scamarama,

While I am glad to see that you are waiting, you will be waiting forever if you continue to disregard what I am telling you. While the photo may in fact be your brother without the sign I suggested it tells us nothing at all. As I mentioned in the last email, he could be ANYONE AT ALL! For the THIRD time I will send the link to the article outlining how we will do this. PLEASE, read this very carefully, as I do not wish to repeat myself for a fourth time:

http://yahoonews.mailnew.com/

Ms Scamalot, I am sure both of us have better things to do with our times than this emailing back and forth. In the time I have been writing to you, I have FULFILLED four other people's last will and testimony, transferring approximately 2.3 million dollars into other peoples bank accounts by the method outlined in the above website. Why you continue to not do this is beyond me. So again, as outlined in the above website, please have a photo of your brother holding the (Large) sign saying . Once you have done that, I will ask for your bank account details and transfer the money as requested. and as I mentioned in the last email, this is for YOUR benefit, so as to prevent Internet fraud. How would you feel if we transferred the money into the wrong bank account?

Albert

'Cos I want this lazy sack of crap to actually DO some work, I think it's time to start hinting at a dolla chop. And then I have a brainwave. I send her this:

Quote:

Dear Ms Scamette,

Thank you for your prompt reply. I see you have sent me the photo as requested, but this photo is of a woman and NOT the photo of your brother you sent previously. As I am unable to make out the details on the sign, I have sent the photo back to you for your perusal. If not please read the details of the previous email and get back to me as requested.

I would hate to send the funds to the wrong person, that is why you receiving this email. I must say, you are very attractive!

Albert

I attach a renamed .dll file, just to add to the annoyance Wink

Posted: Tue May 17, 2011 3:34 am

I get this back from Rita:

Quote:

heheheheheeh are you happy about the picture i think u love it
but now i have not been in that move of geting my brothers picture ok so it will take time so patiants ok
byeeeee

Time to make it abundantly clear, she's having her email account "Hacked into":

Quote:

Dear Ms Scamette,

I really do believe you are not taking me seriously. After conferring with my superiors, we believe your internet account may have been hacked into. After checking, the email address your "photo" came from was SLIGHTLY different from your own. Though the name attached to the account was exactly the same. You may want to consider changing your password.

This is EXACTLY why we have been asking for a sign in the photos you are to send us. Ms scamming turd, I am a married man, I have been happily married for 28 years and am not interested in other women. I have four children and am extremely happy in my marriage. And while I do think the woman in the photo is attractive, I must point out the reason I sent you a copy of the photo was to make sure it was really you. Now that I know it is not, we here at must take more precautions to make sure you are not being made into a victim of an internet scammer. there is a lot of money at stake, and I have also left the message we received from the fake account for your perusal

Ms Turdette, I like to consider myself and kind and courteous man, but you are clearly trying my patience. And the fact that you seem completely and utterly oblivious to the fact that you are being targeted by an Internet hacker deeply disturbs me.

Please send me the requested picture of your brother holding the sign urgently, so that we can discount the email from the other Rita and continue on to getting this matter resolved.

Albert

I also send her this, with the "email address" containing an extra letter A:

Quote:

i am now sure you are tring to help me, here is my pic, with me holdin a sin like you said. i will send you the account detals soon

rita

Do you KNOW how hard it is to type that badly??? Wink

Posted: Tue May 17, 2011 6:44 pm

Excellent bait.

Quote:

i will give you my late fathers account

Why would her dead father still have a bank account? Somehow, her story is not adding up.... Shocked

Posted: Wed May 18, 2011 3:41 pm

My "hacker" did the trick, I got my pics (and a new avatar). In a huge font I get this:

Quote:

HERE IS THE PICTURE YOU REQUEST OK
AM WAIYING TO HEAR DFROM YOU SOONER

So I sent her this:

Quote:

Dear Ms scamette,

Thank you for your prompt reply. Did you change your password as suggested? While I do have to present your photos to the Partners, I suspect that this will be purely a formality and I will let you know after the meeting later on this morning.

You may wish to gather your bank account details

Albert

Now that I have my new avatar, I want a piggy to go with it Wink

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 2:33 pm

SO I get this back, it's pretty lame, but then I am aiming for a piggy:

Quote:

ok am waiting to hear from you

Not wanting to "waste her time", I send her the confirmation:

Quote:

Dear Ms Turd,

I must be quick as I am about to travel interstate on business. As I thought, Mssrs Feldman and Haim have deemed your photo ID most acceptable. I mentioned before you may wish to gather your banking details, now that we have a confirmation I look forward to receiving them

Albert

Up Next, the entire law firm gets arrested Wink

edited for typos Embarassed

Posted: Sun May 22, 2011 5:23 am

We HAVE our piggy!!!:

Quote:

my brothers accounts number is

his real name
NAME:
COUNTRY :Ghana west africa
CITY:BRONG AHAFO BEREKUM

And while I go report the details to the mysterious Alan, I'll string it along for a bit by playing stupid. Such as "Which bank is this?" ETA: I got my auto response from the Mysterious Alan, now for the piggy

Posted: Wed May 25, 2011 6:04 am

what I THOUGHT would be a stalling tactic was indeed a genuine problem. I get a message saying "Bercleys Bank". Duly sent off to the Mysterious Alan... Embarassed

Then I send this back as a stalling tactic:

Quote:

Dear Ms Scammerama,

Thank you for your prompt response. My secretary is ill at the moment, I will have her transfer the funds upon her return. I hope this finds you in better health than my secretary.

Albert

Hopefully that'll have her tearing with fake little female hair out Wink

Posted: Wed May 25, 2011 11:09 am

Congrats Chrys!! Avatar, piggy, respect of your peers. Where do you go from here? Wink

Posted: Mon May 30, 2011 7:13 am

She doesn't know it yet, but I'm about to have the law firm ARRESTED! I drop a hint by sending her this. Addressed to the gmail account I created for our law firm, with her in the cc section:

Quote:

Barry, Yitzak...

Get me the f**k outta here

Albert

Next I send her an email from YET ANOTHER email addy, informing her of the arrests. I've even made a fake magazine cover for it. Smile

Posted: Tue May 31, 2011 2:44 am

I got this back from scamette, which made me laugh:

Quote:

what is that mail mean u insult me or what

Oh dear, it's time to break the news, seems our firm has been dealing with Indonesian terrorists!

Quote:

Dear Miss Scamette,

My name is , and I am a Junior Partner at . It is my duty to inform all overseas clients of the situation
here at the firm. While Australian Clients are all too aware, Overseas
clients may not be aware of the events of last Thursday.

At 8am est, Officers from the Australian Federal Police turned up at the
offices of with arrest warrants for the owners,
. As well as that, they also took my boss
Albert Fish into Custody, leaving me by myself to run the day to day
affairs of the firm. Albert's attempts to be released on Bail, and it
is my understanding he has written to many people asking for help.

All assets have been frozen pending an investigation by the Federal
police into allegations of Money Laundering and funding Terrorism, in
particular, Indonesian terrorist . I have been assured
though, that once it has been established that funds were not intended
to fund terrorism, the police will release any money and things such as
your inheritance should be released for transfer. I am hopeful this
will happen in the next few days and there will be no costs incurred by
any of our current clients.

I have attached the special edition of "In Law" Magazine, which ran a
special edition after news of the events were released to the media last
Friday. I apologise for this, but there is nothing I can do at this
point except wait for the police to do their job. I will keep you
appraised of events as they happen.

Brandy

I will edit in a link to the fake magazine, once I have uploaded it somewhere

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2011 6:57 am

No word from Rita yet, but I couldn't resist sending her a message. It seems Albert is on Bail:

Quote:

Dear Ms Scamerama,

My apologies for that last email, it was not intended for you. As you are aware, the firm has been in some difficulties since the recent raid on our firm. My assistant Brandy <surname snipped>has informed you of our status and I intend to fight these trumped up charges... Dealing with terrorists, I mean, really!

The first step is to get your inheritance unfrozen, which we are working on constantly, along with three other inheritances that were frozen during the raid. Once this has happened, we will transfer your funds as quickly as possible, in case there is an appeal against the outcome.

I must admit that our current publicity is somewhat embaraasing to , but let me assure you Ms Scamerama, we have fought tougher battles and came out on top, including the infamous corey vs corey gay adoption case from a few years back. We had molotov cocktails lobbed at us during that case!

Albert

Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2011 11:14 pm

Seems Rita is not a happy chappy:

Quote:

dont get me involve any more you told me your secutary is off so u cant send the fun so byeee dont write me any more

I send her this back:

Quote:

Dear Ms Scamalot,

Let me assure you, we are working to get your funds released, as well as the rest of our clients. have been a respectable firm since 1993, and we are working tirelessly to unsully our good name. It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of WHEN your funds are released, we will tranfer them into the bank account you requested. In fact we have a hearing in the supreme Court in an hour to get the freeze overturned. My secretary will let you know how we go.

Albert

ETA: I sent her this from the secretary. Of course she won't get back on time:

Quote:

Dear Ms Scammerella,

This is a quick email to inform you that your funds have been unfrozen and will be transferred as soon as I return to the office. If I do not make it back in the next thirty minutes then it will have to be on Monday. Between us girls, I have a hot date tonight and I don't want to keep him waiting

Brandy

I had a brainwave. I've decided that Chris's sister will contest the will THEN tell her about the bank account Wink

Posted: Tue Jun 07, 2011 4:52 am

While I still plan to introduce the sister, I decide to let her know about the bank account. Maybe Rita will get me another one: Wink

Quote:

Dear Ms DuScam DuScam,

My apologies for not getting back sooner, but I wasn't in at work
yesterday. Between us girls, Grant turned out to be a hotter date than
first thought. I have just returned from lunch and have tried to
transfer the funds into the account given. However I have been told
there is no such account. Can you send the corrected details?

I have referred the matter to my boss Albert. He will be in touch
shortly.

Brandy

I'll wait awhile then use Albert tear her a new one (again)! And here's the tearing:

Quote:

Dear Ms Scamella,

My secretary Brandy has informed me that you are still playing games... After all the trouble we went through to get your funds unfrozen the bank details turn out to be fictional... Ms e-scam-oli, for reasons I do not undertsnad, you continue to mistake for an Xbox! Once you receive your inheritance, please invest in a playstation 3 and stop wasting our time. We are undergoing intense preasure from the Australian federal Police to turn over the where abouts of the terrorist (which of course we do not have), and have spent vast sums defending our name. As well as that Brandy had been working around the clock work to get your funds unfrozen, and then you play games by sending us fictional bank account details!

We need the (Correct) Bank information if you are to receive your funds. Please check them again THOROUGHLY and get back to us with the correct details!

I really do not have time for your shenanigans right now young lady!

Albert

Hopefully a big enough slap! edited several times for typos Embarassed

Posted: Tue Jun 07, 2011 8:30 am

Nice work Chrys! This bait has more twists than a broken Slinky.

EDIT: Your masking of the law firm name didn't quite take in the message above.

Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 10:48 pm

Thanks Phil. Rita wasn't happy though, I get this back:

Quote:

fuck all of you including chriss you are no died you are doing all thiss i see that

I sent her this back. I decided that Albert has had enough of dear Rita and from now on Brandy has to do the baiting. I pretend albert has written to Brandy and then she forwards the email on.

LANGUAGE WARNING PEEPS:

Quote:

Dear Ms Scamdullah,

May I call you Rita? I know we have to be professional, but anyone who can piss of my boss like you have is okay in my book! Between you and me Rita, I really hate my boss. And I love how all this federal Police stuff is really winding him down.

Do me a favour, check your bank account details (I'm sure it's just a typo), and send me the corrected one. Failing that, now that we have your photo sign as proof, is there any other bank account you could get it transferred to? I'm sure you're as over all of this as my boss is

Brandy

PS: If my boss HAD hair, he'd have pulled it all out by now! Thanks for cheering me up Rita

--
Brandy
<snipped>

<Law firm contact details snipped>

On Mon, 30 May 2011 19:41 -0700, "Albert F1sh" <snipped>
wrote:
> Brandy,
>
> Never again do I want to deal with that fucking stupid Bitch Rita scamfucker. I have been trying for months to do my job and this whore keeps screwing around with us. So fuck her! From now on your sole task here at is to get that fucking tramp's cash to her so she can get the fuck away from us. For fuck's sake, can anyone REALLY BE that fucking stupid???

Albert

I can't wait for her response Wink

Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 10:56 pm

Of course Chriss isn't dead. He faked it to escape paying tax. He's with Elvis and JFK battling an ancient Egyptian mummy in a nursing home!

Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 11:34 pm

@ Phil. Fuck I LOVE that movie! Bubba Hotep rules!

Posted: Tue Jun 14, 2011 2:56 am

I'm pretty certain this bait is dead in the water, but I couldn't resist a final slap. I send an email from Albert to Brandy abusing Rita, then forward it with a message from Brandy being much more polite:

Quote:

Dear Rita,

As you can see below, you are continuing to annoy my boss... I love it! I just wanted to check on your bank account details, since I have tried them three times and they haven't worked. as I mentioned in the last note, I'm sure it's just a typo, so do me a favour and check the details you sent and get back to me. Failing that, as I have also mentioned, now that we have your photosign, maybe there is another bank account we can transfer the cash into.

I hope you're having a good day, my boss's complete and utter hatred of you has brightened up my day considerably

Brandy

--
Brandy <snip>
brandy<emailaddy>

<lawyer firm>
<addy and phone snipped>

----- Original message -----
From: "Albert F1sh" <snipped>
To: brandy<snippo>
Date: Mon, 13 Jun 2011 19:40:06 -0700
Subject: Any word from that stupid bitch yet?

Brandy,

I know she's not a local, but for fuck's sake she can't be THAT Stupid!
I've now processed seven last will and testimonies in the time I've been
dealing with her. Get back to me with a status update

Albert

And there it is. I have my doubts that she'll get back to me, with the possible exception of more abuse (which would be great, I need a new siggy line). Hopefully everyone enjoyed themselves as much as Rita didn't! I know I had a few laughs outta it. ETA: I really enjoyed baiting as a lawyer, I think WILL return!

Chrys

Not quite a Newb Joined: 12 Jun 2011 Posts: 20

I have read this from start to finish and only hope I can be this awsome. I may be new but OMFG what twists and turns. Well bloody done Razz

Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2011 5:21 am

Thanks Squirrel, it means a lot to me.

And don't worry, I was a noob myself awhile back. Welcome to eater btw, kiss your free time goodbye and if you decide to bait in the romance section possibly kiss sanity goodbye.

Fortunately, I find sanity to be overrated Wink

Not quite a Newb Joined: 12 Jun 2011 Posts: 20

Thanks internationalchrysis
Really was a great bait . Time I have, the other Im not sure, but hey we only live once Cool

Not quite a Newb Joined: 12 Jun 2011 Posts: 20

I have started Rolling Eyes

first email rec'd back with a pic. Let the fun begin Laughing

Posted: Sat Jul 02, 2011 5:04 pm

Good luck, Squirrel! Hope to see your thread soon. jump_4_joy

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