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 How to scrounge up some cash. --- Safari time?

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Dr Mike
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 6:43 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

We all know how difficult it can be to get cash when we really want to make that big break and benefit from some dead "relative" or whatever.

After i got my lad to "pay" for the first fee of some £5500, i of course went ahead and spent all my money.

But surprise surprise, there where more fees to pay.

Well I explained that i was very low on cash and i asked him for some advise. Well he did actually give me some advise.

Quote:
1. If you have any valuable property you can sale to come with this fee, i would advice you to sale it. Of course you shall have more than enough money to acquire them back as soon as the transfer is completed.


2. You can also seek a loan from your bank, i believe that they would grant you this loan.


Well i believe that my lad have a very twisted idea of why banks are actually granting loans. New house, yes. New car, maybe. Prostitutes, probably not. Sending it of to Nigeria, not a chance.

And i can't really see anything in my characters home worth selling either, perhaps the old food processor from Apfelstrudel will be worth a few euros but not enough to cover the fee of £3740.

No i think that it is time to involve the church. Luckily my church are about to send away a large consignment with cash and other relief stuff. If i give him some of the church's money he can use that to pay for the fee. And since i will be paying it back when i get my money it wont be stealing, will it?

Of course i have to make it clear to him that he can't touch the rest of the stuff, which by the way is very valuable. The service is being provided by a reliable company called GP5 3-Tr4ck.

This could be fun.
Laughing

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Last edited by Dr Mike on Fri Jan 14, 2011 12:20 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Happy_Slacker
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 7:42 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Why not go for some more drastic measures? Begin by offering your blood for cash, and then maybe an organ or two? Very Happy

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Dr Mike
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 8:10 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Blood won't get me much cash, only a cool t-shirt. But i do like the organ idea. I can tell the lad that i might sell my kidney.

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leonsumbitches
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 8:13 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^ I'm sure I saw some organ lads in the Surplus forum.

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 10:24 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Cammy/Eliza has twice sold her body for cash, and it wasn't pleasant. In both cases the Lads were initially mildly reluctant to let her, but were happy to receive the money gained thereby.

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 10:47 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I offered to let my wife go to my pervert neighbour who had offered money lots of times. Lad refused and never brought that one up again. I think he was a young newbie.
Doesn't talk to me now though. Sad

Edit: I'm sure that you can always get a loan.

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Dr Mike
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:44 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

If a lad isn't willing to pimp out his victims it is just because he isn't committed enough.
And lads who are really willing to go that extra mile will not think twice before they tell little girls to sell their bodies.

However i doubt that my old reverend would get much money for his body. Laughing

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 04, 2011 11:48 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Hmmm... organ donations.... how much could you get for your genitals?

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 05, 2011 1:54 am Reply with quoteBack to top

^^ just small change Embarassed

The other day I sent my lad a loan lad script telling him I was going to apply for a loan from this guy is it ok if I put you down as a reference? He told me it was a scam..

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Dr Mike
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 05, 2011 9:48 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I went ahead and did like Bravo. And just like his lad my lad told me that it was a scam. No surprises there.

However he did say something that put me of a little.

Quote:
Since you work in a congregation, i mean in the church,is there no means you can raise the fee from your church so that as soon as to make the payment. As soon as you have received the fund from the bank you can then refund the money back to the church.

I see this as a better idea, all you have to do is to give it a try.


He got some nerves to try to make me steal from the church. But as you know i was gonna suggest this very action myself, but now i don't have to. And as he did it himself he will think of it as his idea and is therefore less likely to be suspicious.

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 05, 2011 9:54 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

How dare him suggest you pillage the orphan fund to pay his fees! I guess they will be fine skipping a couple meals for now knowing soon the church will have enough money to buy the orphans x-boxes to play with.

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 05, 2011 10:19 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Which fund to borrow from?

The renovation fund would be fine, as no-one bothers to monitor it... damn, but it's not even half the amount needed.

The relief fund would be more than enough, if it weren't for the fact that it's too carefully audited. Wait, when is the next audit due? Could you get the money away and sent and then pay it back before that?

(And then there's a surprise audit just before you send it, so you have to put the money back quickly.)

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 05, 2011 11:28 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Try the priest's discretionary fund as it can be used for anything -- providing there are sufficient funds in it. A priest has carte blanche for using discretionary funds and they are not monitored or audited.

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Dr Mike
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 05, 2011 11:30 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

All good ideas. I am inclined to use the relief fund. But that of course means that i will have to with the relief transfer. And that is not going by WU or the Bank. No that is going by GP5 3-Tr4ck which of course means that he will have to pick it up himself. And it isn't going to Lagos but to Cotonou.

To spice up the offer i tell him that his money will be transferred with more cash and laptops to schools in Parakou which he have to promise not to touch.

I hope this works out as i would love a pith in my siggy line.

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Dr Mike
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 10, 2011 10:49 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I have had a few mails from my lad. One that was from his old addy which he said to ignore so i did. Especially as he claimed that he hadn't heard from me in two weeks. Either hes confused by all his addys of he have been hacked. Well never mind. I said that i might get him the money but it wold not be possible to send it to Lagos.

I also introduced the wondrous concept of GP5 3-Tr4ck to him. And i got a promising response.

Quote:
Dear Rev. Alois Schickelgruber,


Sir,
I am delighted to know that you have come up with a better plan on how to send the money across to me. But i will like to know the contents in the consignment, of course i shall take only the 3750 and leave the rest, but were are the rest of the goods going to?


In view of this and because of my busy time schedule , i shall send one of my representative to pick up the money in Cotonou. Below is the name of my representative, you are to use his name and send the consignment.


Receiver Name: S0LA AJ1BOLA S4MUEL


Please also send me the gp5 3-tr4ck of the consignment and also a copy of the receipt my email.


I shall be waiting to hear from you,


I'm perhaps getting my hopes up here but i can't help myself. This could be fun.

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 10, 2011 11:56 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Dr Mike wrote:
If a lad isn't willing to pimp out his victims it is just because he isn't committed enough.
And lads who are really willing to go that extra mile will not think twice before they tell little girls to sell their bodies.

However i doubt that my old reverend would get much money for his body. Laughing


sell your uncle's car

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roland685
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 4:24 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Sell your car.

I would love to see how this one turns out...
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ChoppaOfDolla
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 6:30 am Reply with quoteBack to top

You know, you could always try a bank loan. Be sure to tell the bank exactly what the money is for. Twisted Evil

I always use the "need the money for my daughter's chemo" line. See if he's willing to let you spend it.[/i]

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Rowenar
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 5:30 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Good luck with this!
If you need money...can't really suggest much better than the ones already here.
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Dr Mike
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 6:21 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Thanks for the suggestions but the dear Reverend was unable to scrounge up the cash so he decided to "loan" it from his church like the lad suggested. The money will soon (hopefully) be on route to Cotonou for him to pick up. All he have to do is to cross the border from Nigeria to get there. Twisted Evil

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 7:56 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I'll give you 5 x 1000 Indian Rupees for the Apfelstrudel food processor.

Will include a free Gandhi with every note.
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Happy_Slacker
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 9:26 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Organs is one thing, how about selling your soul to the almighty dark lord (Hail Satan! Twisted Evil ) for a few bucks to cover the lad's required fees? Since these lads are so superstitious and religious, would they still want to do business with someone who has pledged themselves to Satan? Very Happy

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 10:22 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Dr Mike, Go for the safari to Cotonou. Tell him he will have to pick up the consignment himself. You can't trust anyone else to pick it up except him. You can't trust someone else won't steal the whole thing. If he can't pick it up personally you will have to figure a different way to to get his £3740.

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Dr Mike
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 10:32 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

To late i've already told him that the parcel is in Samuels name. But in the end i don't think it will matter as they are one and the same. And besides i can't bother the chief of Bank of Nigeria to got to Benin now can i?

And i now believe that he isn't my original scammer but a dolla chopper. I still get mails from his old addy which he told me was hacked. But i cant risk answering as it might be him that try to get me to fuck up, that and the fact that he told me not to answer.

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Dr Mike
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 14, 2011 12:19 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

My lads still had some more questions and requests.

Quote:
Sir,
I am glad to know that everything has being planned well. Nevertheless i understand all that you have written to me. On a more serious note, i want you to give me the names that will be on each of the package which are are about to send, this is to avoid Samuel not to pick up the wrong item(or so that he knows what to steal), therefore it is very important that you send me the names that will be on each of the packages.

Again, when you are to send the receipt, you are to also forward a copy of the receipt to S0la Ajibo1a Samue1 to his email address: ----snipped----. He shall be expecting to receive your mail any time.

As for the gps-3tr4ck, i sign up and they were requiting for the tracking code of the item which you are about to send, please can you send me the tracking code?

I shall be exepecting to read from you,
Regards,


Well, as he believes the good Reverend so gullible that he gives all the parcels and their content away, i will of course do just that. So i sent him a nice list so that he knows what parcels within consignment to take apart from his own.

I have a good feeling about this and i firmly think that he will do the trip. The trip is to take place on Monday.

The funny thing is that my only goal with this lad was to get rid of him as he wasn't that fun. But then i got the idea that i might try for a safari and started to work for that. Compared to other baiters i might have more of a ad hoc style when i bait. Make things up as i go along.

BTW, this is the same lad that wanted me to sent the money for my daughters cancer treatment to him.

I have also got a mail from his alter ego Samuel who is the one who is going to do the trip. He seems to be looking forward to it too.

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