Star Wars Safari--Day 13. Sick, tired, broke.

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Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 1:53 pm

@Leon: DR Congo!! Worst place in Africa, or so they say.

insults and more · Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 2:03 pm

The Dane: Notice the telephone number on the first receipt. It's different than the one listed. No area code either. If it listed a 77 area code, at least we could be sure the number, whatever it was, was in 8auchi.

It's also completely different than the number he gave us as the receptionist.

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 2:05 pm

I noticed that. All the numbers are different. However, as Psychicbait pointed out to me on the chat, it doesn't have to mean anything. Smalltime hotels may still use old forms after they got a new phone no. - and we're talking Africa here. So I don't know if it means anything.

insults and more · Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 2:07 pm

^^^ You're right. All it means is that I hate him a little bit more.

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 2:20 pm

^^^ Yeah, just when you thought that wasn't possible....

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 2:43 pm

They seem genuine. Spelling errors (eg, 'cahier') are quite common in such places.

Not to say that he hasn't had the hotel staff artificially inflate the totals.

insults and more · Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 2:55 pm

^^^ That's not the concern right now. The bastard has been reticent about giving us any kind of verification that he is actually in 8auchi.

All his emails resolve to Lagos at most, the phone numbers he has given us are not 8auchi landlines but mobiles, and he's stalled us on giving photos.

Right now, we want proof that he's not been pulling our legs the entire time. We know he's in Nigeria, but we can't prove he went further than Lagos.

He's been sent a tracking email, but I don't think it's given us verification yet.

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 3:04 pm

The Monsignor wrote:

They seem genuine. Spelling errors (eg, 'cahier') are quite common in such places.

Not to say that he hasn't had the hotel staff artificially inflate the totals.

I've checked the italic font with "What the font": Almost certainly it is ancient and has never been transformed into a digital font. That means there is a set of lead letters in a print shop and there is no way to photoshop the receipt.

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 3:05 pm

^^^Not so fast, Chewie.
I think Monsignor has given ammnition for further emails from Lance.
How can he confide in a pastor who pads the hotel bill? Cool

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 3:54 pm

@Leonsumbitches: Siberia! That would certainly be deserving of a Golden Pith!

For my part, I believe he is in B4uchi. And I believe he is pretty well stredded, AND continuing to rack up debts for every thing he does there.

Great job by The Dane for staying firm with the Pastor and getting these receipts. Now to dodge this WU transfer.

Pastor emailed me this morning with a photo of the map that Luke sent, and asked me if I would look it over and tell him if it is the right location.

We need to get him moving again. Not sure how he is going to do that if he owes the hotel for 7 nights.

EDITED TO SAY: 33000 Naira = 217 USD, roughly.

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 4:19 pm

I will stall him until the weekend, and cut him off the MTCN during that. By Monday, his only option will be the box.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 12 Dec 2009 Posts: 13

Why not have the battery run out now? Then have him dig blindly!

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 6:56 pm

^^^ Well, because for now, he seems more interested in getting the MTCN than to start digging. We need his focus back on the GPS before we can let it run out of battery. Wink

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 9:50 pm

Ladies and gentlemen - I present to you... one frustrated lad:

First, Lanc3 called him, after letting him cook for hours:
http://www.mediafire.com/?87882u6fhv47h9a

DoraTheExplorer then posed as a WU Employee, and had an important message for him:
http://www.mediafire.com/?v36nvn287kie3a7

Now, Lanc3 called him again to let him now he did his part - listen to his woe:
http://www.mediafire.com/?rydbd5j1tbdt7yp

Some interest things - his reaction to Dora's little surprise towards the end, and the fact that he wants Luk3 and H4ns to go to Accra... I'm back to not knowing what to make of it all. :/

And to Dora: One helluva job! I'm in love. Very Happy

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 10:21 pm

IMHO: we have one really really screwed stredded lad. I think at this point he is worried about saving his own neck. If he doesn't get out of Bauchi he is going to be arrested.

Not only does he owe the hotel for 7 nights, but he borrowed money from the receptionist to open a bank account, and hired a digger for a day that he was supposed to pay.

My gut tells me he was hoping to get out of town and get the money and maybe go back and settle his debts (that part I doubt). But now that the money is restricted to paying out in Bauchi he has to hide himself for 48 hours from all the people he owes money to.

I'd say we have a pretty good chance of getting this lad arrested.

PS: Thanks for the call Dora! It was a great help!

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 10:28 pm

I think you're right. Voiced a smiliar opinion elsewehere as well - my problem is, that I'm only 98% convinced.

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 11:36 pm

Y'all are welcome. Anything to help. Wink

And congrats on your safari and one very frustrated lad! 'OH MY GOD! Laughing

Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 11:54 pm

Anyone with doubts, keep in mind that the lads aren't all that creative. He's not making this up as he goes, he's relaying his version of the activities that are transpiring.

This lad is in trouble.

Posted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 12:07 am

^^^ I think you're right. The bills are the real thing, and he's there.

IF he got bois in Bauchi to get blank recepits from the real hotel,
they have to be the most efficient bois in Africa. Because the time frame from when I gave him instructions about the scans and I received them is only 11 hours, out of which most of them was during curfew. In the remaining time - we're talking between 10 PM and 9 AM MINUS curfew time - they have to had to make the decision, get the instructions to his bois in Bauchi, negociate with the hotel clerk to give them blank bills, fill the bills, scan then and send them to me. I somehow don't think they're that decisive and that their machinery would be that oiled. And I think we can rule out a photochop as well.

I'm back siding with NWM. He's there - but he's homesick now.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 07 Jul 2010 Posts: 15

Is it intentional that he's in Bauchi in a starwars bait?

Anyway, great stuff guys. Maybe you can get Bob Baffet going after him at some point.

Posted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 1:37 am

@Alexi:

We tried to get him to Alderaan, but found out that it had been obliterated by the Death Star. Too bad, that. Would've earned us a Golden Pith. Intergalactic Lad Safari.

Posted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 2:06 am

Ok Luke came out of hiding out at his lakehouse to run into town for some porkskins and budweiser necessities ya know. He called up Clet to see what was going on.

All this time we were worried about the money in the ground turns out Clet has had around the clock security guarding the loot. Also seems like he has some buds in Jos. Which apparently he needs to go shack up with since he has outstayed his welcome in Bauchi.

http://callrec.me/DVQHZLUR

Posted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 8:09 am

Well, this is interesting.

I called up the number that was on the hotel receipt that The Dane so superbly extracted from our lad.

As you may know, there have been some differences in opinion as to whether or not The Pastor ever actually made it to Bauchi.

Here is the call. I'm not sure which is worse--the connection, or my accent. You'll have to put on your detective hats and listen to this call closely.

http://www.4shared.com/audio/P49EXquf/terminus.html

That settles it for me. Pastor was there, and took off in the night just like he told us.

Posted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 8:50 am

I've just arrived home from seeing out the Christmas season.
The mountain elves seemed to have hidden the keyhole to my flat, but I managed to get in eventually.

@Dora- Superb work. Unique. Utterly believable. clapping

"How do I pay my hotel bills?"
Wonderful. Location limited WUxfer. Awesome.

@theDane-Fascintating third call.
He talks of not having anywhere to sleep, yet has family in the area? This can be exploited later, I think.

@Bravo- lovely call. He wants Luke or Hans to meet him in Ghana and go with them to B@uchi.
Perhaps something along those lines could be arranged.
Sounds a great idea.
"I'm gonna shave that bastrd". Oh Chewie. I still believe in you. Really I do.
LOL at how he's built Chewie into the villian of the piece.
He doesn't know what evil is, yet.

insults and more · Posted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 9:15 am

NWM: now that is confirmation!

Psychicbait: Chewie accomplishes through incompetence and malfeasance what a normal villain would have to accomplish through skill and the possession of a goatee.

It can be argued that Chewie is all goatee. God forbid he ever goes sober and uses the full range of his potential.

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