Your baiting characters' unfortunate happenings

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Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 5:19 pm

The forum is full of all the crap we put lads through. I'm curious as to our baiting characters, though.

What horrible things have you put them through?

I'll start with this: I almost feel sorry for my main baiting character. In one bait, he shot and killed his banker for meddling in the transaction and conspiring with the lad.

He then freaked out and went on the run, traveling from the US to Seoul, Cairo (where he stole a car, prompting the quote in my sig), Khartoum, and finally Douala. A safari attempt there failed hopelessly.

In Douala he shacked up with some frat boys and ended up taking an African psychedelic drug and tripping out of his mind. Almost a hundred incoherent emails to the lad followed.

Two weeks later, he woke up in an alley in Berlin with some pretty selective amnesia.

Even though it may not be successful, it's such fun to make up crazy twists like this! So I'd like to hear about all your characters' misfortunes, and how your lads reacted.

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 5:31 pm

Romoval of my testicle.

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 5:57 pm

I got fired from my job and in trouble with the police after I stole money from my colleagues to raise the funds he required - my boss saw me and reported me to the police. Very Happy

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 6:03 pm

I have one where my main character completely forgot the millions and wanted the girl instead - The lad played along and my character went to "her" rescue and ended up getting robbed, stabbed and beaten - He died last Sunday morning due to his severe injuries - Poor fellow Crying or Very sad

The lad still tries to get money out of my character's company - That's a bit sickening Evil or Very Mad

I'll publish that one when it's completed.

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 6:04 pm

One of my characters has been burned in a Hummer accident, imprisoned in a vault against her will where she was forced to take drugs and eat cold gourmet meals, and escaped in part by poisoning her captor with a tampon. Lad still taking the credit for 'rescuing' me by telling me what day of week it was. Rolling Eyes

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 6:11 pm

Well, 10 year old Agnes Slapper had a few problems while trying to pay a hitlad.
1) Her pa beat her for taking his credit card.
2) She was arrested while trying to send the hitlad $50.
3) She fell asleep on the train travelling to another courier in the next town, and overshot her destination by 500 miles.

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 6:17 pm

Oh, that one testicle male character loved to have sex with his sister. Razz

Master Baiter Joined: 24 Jul 2009 Posts: 137

Was arrested and jailed by the Secret Service for throwing my own excrement at Hillary Clinton during a parade.

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 7:15 pm

Oneofmycharactershastroublewithhiskeyboard.Thespacebardoesn'twork. Laughing

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 7:36 pm

One of my characters was attacked by demons, who first possessed him then killed him....

Another character spent several days driving around London with the corpse of his recently deceased (murdered) wife in the trunk, looking for a place to drop the body where none of those London spy cameras would spot it (he eventually crated the body up and mailed it to the mugu in Lagos, but it was intercepted by the authorities, whose only clue to the identity of the murderer was an address in Lagos....)

Another character (one that I use repeatedly) suffers from recurring attacks of Lycanthropy, which happen at the most inconvenient moments.

Bruin

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 7:41 pm

Bohigal wrote:

poisoning her captor with a tampon

sorry, but I don't think anything can beat that.

Lad wanted me to send him a package of mobile phones. I agreed, but told him under no circumstances should he open the red packet - that would be collected by another contact. The consignment was intercepted at the airport - the red packet contained cocaine destined for my 'cousin' in Lagos. My character was then murdered by his own brother for losing the cocaine. Lad was passed through 2 other characters who were both murdered by the drug gang.

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 13 Aug 2010 Posts: 15

conga22 wrote:

Oneofmycharactershastroublewithhiskeyboard.Thespacebardoesn'twork. Laughing

I really shouldn't laugh. My old computer had a keyboard with faulty Space key

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 9:38 pm

Well, I'm still early in my first baits, so it isn't very spectacular.
This bait targets a recovery scammer.
My character's background (slowly revealed to the lad):

She was involved in a NOK scam before. WU transfers always went wrong. MTCN errors and dolla chops. The barrister dropped here after the typical lad insults. She went to complain to WU. Got laughed at and later thrown out of the WU office. She's scared to hell of WU now. If a lad wants her to go the WU office, he'll have to drag her there kicking and screaming.

In the mean time she got involved with another made-up scammer in Ghana. He was very understanding about her WU troubles and immediately gave her a bank account number. She transferred sums of money to that bank account and the scammer is very happy about that. She's now about to transfer another $60,000 to this made-up scammer.

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 9:43 pm

One of mine was flying from New York to Los Angeles but due to bad weather had to divert to Beijing.

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 10:36 pm

Sigh. My main character is a little old lady whose biggest adventure in recent weeks was to get drunk and fall up the steps of a city pub, laughing all the way Rolling Eyes

Well she does have asthma, mobility problems, recurrent amnesia and arthritis so it was pretty major stuff for her. Particularly as the grocery shop no longer offered a Western Union service and she needed urgent reviving.

I promise to bait more adventurously soon. I nearly had a great time with one character whose husband had run off with her best friend and she was left with nothing but the three houses, five sports cars and the house in Malibu. Her language was terrible. I was quite shocked. And then the lad's email address died Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 11:08 pm

One of my female characters is young and nieve and does not have any money at all.
So she has to borrow it from a neighbour who is a pervert and will only give her the cash if she allows him to shag her.

She often asks the lad for advice on how to please a man, seeing as she has never done it before.

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 11:09 pm

Captain Mal's had some bad luck.

He's had his leg badly fractured in a car crash more than once.
Thanks to that fracture he was struck down by DVT on an intercontinental flight.
That leg's become infected; once it led to amputation.
His inner ear damage from an IED explosion in Fallujah has become infected too; once this caused drastic balance problems and a fall down stairs that left him with a broken collarbone.
He was detained at Heathrow, and arrested at the airport at Abuja and sent to Kuje prison, where he got dysentery.

Cammy's had less in the way of traumas, though twice she sold herself to a rich playboy with perverted tastes and had to endure anal sex, just to oay Lad fees.

Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 11:10 pm

In order to get the needed funds,my vic decided to rip off his former drug dealer employer.Bad luck,in the ensuing gunfight the drug dealer's wife and children were killed,but he survived.This required my vic to leave the country in a hurry with a lot of cash,but somehow he never made it to Nigeria with all that cash for Dr. Soludo.

Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 12:23 am

What I find amazing is the complete apathy shown by the lads when you explain your characters various adventures afterwards - which usually results in nothing more than 'OK but you need to send money quick' or similar.

Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 12:49 am

My favorite wild character was a (married) church secretary who happened to be psychotic. She fell in love with the lad and started talking with him about killing her husband so she could be with the lad. She was wildly delusional and the lad got frightened. Then she killed her husband and was soon arrested. Another church official sent the lad news clippings about it, which implicated her African lover/partner. The fun part was that I traced his IP to a specific computer center so I worked into another news clip. The lad needed new underwear after that.

Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 12:55 am

My character's sister has died a few times... From an Infected Madagascar!

Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 1:29 am

I was invited into a Scamorama member's bait as his character's abusive and racist father, who ended up in Cuba, a suspect in a triple homicide hate crime, having fled Mexico after shooting two bounty hunters disguised as FBI agents.

Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 1:29 am

Wow, Corona, never saw our twisted side. My fav character has been murdered, robbed, mugged, cursed by demons, helicopter crash, snowmobile crash, sued by investors, and most recently travelling West Africa on business Shocked

.

Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 2:02 am

Well--in El Sorcho's Nutty Professor thread my character was brutally murdered by the Gomer Boyz. Mutilated and murdered. Certain body parts removed and shoved down my throat.

Most recently with one lad of mine (I've had for a few months), I suffered a major heart attack after I attacked the Money Gram clerk for robbing me. I'm awaiting a heart transplant. And thanks to my co-baiters, we have driven a car into the WU office and it's only open now twice a week as they are under repairs.

Since I need a delay with him for payment I am going to help co-baiters (one is a "reverend") with the circumcision of kosher elephants at the zoo by the rabbi. I don't think the elephants are going to like it too much...

That's about it for me. I have a few others, but they're the ones where you have to be there to understand it.

Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 5:19 am

My current bait is probably my most interesting.

The original main character Eva K0konen from Helsinki, Finland was a CEO of a "Party Planning" company and was planning on expanding to Italy and then into Africa. While she was in Italy, she had her receptionist Anna Ibanoba Okawa (replace the "b" with "v" and replace the "k" to "g") take over for her while she was away. My lad expected Miss Eva to still contact her while she was there for 2 weeks on business and got angry that wasn't replying. Then when she got home from Italy, she fired Anna for a misunderstanding (which leads to her being deported to America and she heads back to Japan to be with family) with the lad and for causing a co-worker (who's significance will become important later on). Anna begged for the lad's forgiveness and then I had these two characters talk smack about the other and the lad responded appropriately. Eventually, Eva's "gmail" account is "hacked" by Joanne (the former co-worker who left without a trace and sent the lad quite the threatening email). Eventually, Joanne's assistant "Giovanni" sends the lad an email explaining that the two character's have the "fountain of youth" bloodline trait and that they need it for "everlasting youth" and so the ninjas and mafia search for Eva and Eva flees to Sweden but is then murdered by Miss Ratter jee (Played by Psychicbait) who was hired by Joanne to search and destroy Anna as well.
Anna then finds a trip to Africa Safari at an Aoyama café in Tokyo and decides to take part in the Safari. She was hired as a Japanese-English-Russian interpreter via the Sxmba Safari Camp. Where she interpreted and made lots of money. After a while she was kidnapped and taken to Ghana by Joanne's brother (who is competing against Joanne). Anna is then rapped by Joanne's brother and two Ghanaians and was left in a windowless hotel room. She escaped and headed back to the camp to grab her stuff and leave (without telling the camp that she was leaving).
She flies back to Japan where she ends up pregnant and working 12 hour shifts to get the lad his money. The Sxmba Safari Camp is going to sue her and slap her with a huge fine if she does not come back and interpret for the Russian and Japanese tourists. She finds out that the "pregnancy" is really just two "tape worms" that found their way into the food she ate while captive.

The story will continue... Twisted Evil

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