Have UK banks learned nothing ?

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Posted: Sun Jun 20, 2010 6:28 pm

I'm sorry but this scam mail gave me a coffee/keyboard moment. Laughing

Quote:

THE EXECUTIVE GOVERNOR OF YORKSHIER BANK OF NIGERIA (Y.B.N)
HEAD OFFICE LAGOS NIGERIA GARIKI PHASE 2.
LAGOS NIGERIA FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA

Not a lot to say to that except maybe 'EKKY THUMP' (and that isn't a Lad's name).

LOL_sign

He could have got the spelling right at least.

Posted: Sun Jun 20, 2010 8:27 pm

Yorkshire. Gravestone engraver approched to put 'She were Thine' on a gravestone, but in his haste put 'She were thin'. The client comes along, notices and says 'You forgot the "e"'. Engraver goes back to work, client returns to see gravestone "Eeeee, she were thin"

Posted: Sun Jun 20, 2010 9:12 pm

Four Yorkshiremen Sketch

Four well-dressed men sitting together at a vacation resort

Michael Palin: Ahh.. Very passable, this, very passable.

Graham Chapman: Nothing like a good glass of Chateau de Chassilet, ay Josiah?

Terry Gilliam: You're right there Obadiah.

Eric Idle: Who'd a thought thirty years ago we'd all be sittin' here drinking Chateau de Chassilet?

MP: Aye. In them days, we'd a' been glad to have the price of a cup o' tea.

GC: A cup ' COLD tea.

EI: Without milk or sugar.

TG: OR tea!

MP: In a cracked cup an'all.

EI: We never used to have a cup. We used to have to drink out of a rolled up newspaper.

GC: The best WE could manage was to suck on a piece of damp cloth.

TG: But you know, we were happy in those days, though we were poor.

MP: BECAUSE we were poor. My old Dad used to say to me, "Money doesn't buy you happiness."

EI: 'E was right. I was happier then and I had NOTHIN'. We used to live in this tiny old house, with great big holes in the roof.

GC: House? You were lucky to have a HOUSE! We used to live in one room, all hundred and twenty-six of us, no furniture. Half the floor was missing; we were all huddled together in one corner for fear of FALLING!

TG: You were lucky to have a ROOM! WE used to have to live in a corridor!

MP: We used to DREAM of livin' in corridor! Woulda' been a palace to us. We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We got woken up every morning by having a load of rotting fish dumped all over us! House!? Hmph.

EI: Well when I say "house" it was only a hole in the ground covered by a piece of tarpaulin, but it was a house to US.

GC: We were evicted from our hole in the ground; we had to go and live in a lake!

TG: You were lucky to have a LAKE! There were a hundred and sixty of us living in shoebox in the middle o' road.

MP: Cardboard box?

TG: Aye.

MP: You were lucky. We lived for three months in a brown paper bag in a septic tank. We used to have to get up at six o'clock in the morning, clean the bag, eat a crust of stale bread, go to work down mill for fourteen hours a day week in-week out. When we got home, out Dad would thrash us to sleep with his belt!

GC: Luxury. We used to have to get out of the lake at three o'clock in the morning, clean the lake, eat a handful of hot gravel, go to work at the mill every day for tuppence a month, come home, and Dad would beat us around the head and neck with a broken bottle, if we were LUCKY!

TG: Well we had it tough. We used to have to get up out of the shoebox at twelve o'clock at night, and LICK the road clean wit' tongue. We had half a handful of cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at the mill for fourpence every six years, and when we got home, our Dad would slice us in two with a bread knife.

EI: Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night, half an hour before I went to bed, drink a cup of sulphuric acid, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad and our Mum would kill us, and dance about on our graves singing "Hallelujah."

MP: But you try and tell the young people today that... and they won't believe ya'.

ALL: No they won't!

Posted: Mon Jun 21, 2010 3:32 pm

^^^^^^

By 'eck, that were one of their best. Very Happy

Posted: Mon Jun 21, 2010 3:39 pm

Monty Python Hijack .. this and the Roman with the speech impediment in Life of Brian.

Quote:

Welease Woddewick

Posted: Mon Jun 21, 2010 5:34 pm

One more Python quote and this gets renamed and moved to GC.

Besides, It's a simple question of weight ratios - a five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut.

Posted: Mon Jun 21, 2010 5:59 pm

"NI!!"

Posted: Wed Jun 23, 2010 7:45 am

about as dumb as the CANADAINA lottery. I don't know what they were going for there, I can only surmise a hybrid word of China and Canada.

I'm perplexed, dazed and confused...

"CANADAINA LOTTERY" <[email protected]>

And y'all thought I was kidding. it's only worth a crummy pittance of 1 million. I know, for those of you used to offers of 12, 15, 35 million and more this is feed for a chicken. pffft, I spit on your offer of 1 million.

Anybody want to ASEM -addy included, have at 'em. Oh, a name
Mr. Paul Seaman Wait a minute they gave me a website to KILL.
I killed a bank acct. (B of A) this morn. and a sacrificial lamb website tonight in the same day. Even had a quick note from Alan. Stand back folks, Brainiac is going for a Maple Leaf flag in the sig.

Posted: Wed Jun 23, 2010 8:41 am

^ Go for it, Brainiac! There's nothing like the smell of 404 in the morning Very Happy

Eta: You know you can start a new topic on the fake site section here, right? http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewforum.php?f=57

Not quite a Newb Joined: 27 Aug 2004 Posts: 23

llamedos wrote:

"NI!!"

Are you saying Ni to that old mugu?

Oh, what sad times are these when passing ruffians such as llamedos can say Ni at will to old mugu's. There is a pestilence upon this land, nothing is sacred. Even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under considerable economic stress in this period in history.

Posted: Wed Jun 23, 2010 5:15 pm

No we've decided we are now the baiters who say "Ekke Ekke Ekke Ekke Ptang Zoo Boing Zow Zing" instead .. oh they've gone ..

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