Worst format?

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Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2010 4:30 pm

I've actually received worse than this, but this model of textual economy, arrived just now, is pretty well up there with the most dismal efforts I've ever seen. Can any of your lads beat it?

Quote:

From: [email protected]

Subject: REQUEST FOR ASISTANCE

Goodday Sir/Madam

I am writing this mail to you with tears and sorrow from myNAMES
CONTACT ADDRESS
CELL PHONE NUMBER
HOME NUMBER
OCCUPATION
COPY OF ID

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2010 4:55 pm

It's obvious the lad is suffering terribly with tears in his eyes so you can't expect him to follow all script standards. You can imagine all those horrid experiences he has gone through. He may have met cruel people like someone from Eater. His magas may have refused to send him all their monies. A bad guyman maybe chopped his dollaz. Etc. Etc. Crying or Very sad

Treat him with special care. Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2010 5:21 pm

Maybe

The First Timer (Originus tohellicum): Lad who sends out scripts that are so pointless and incomplete they can only have been a trail effort by a n00b scammer.

Note the template stuff he left in Smile

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2010 5:26 pm

This one is pretty short :

http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=185552

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2010 6:30 pm

It's got to be replied to, so that he thinks it is a jolly good format, and keeps sending it out!

'Hi, I'm kinda upset, so please send me your passport.'

Yeah, that'll work.

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2010 6:50 pm

Yes, let's give the laddo lots of replies. That is a really GOOD puke

script. Thanks for pimping the addy

edit: my reply-I can help.

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2010 6:59 pm

Pretty lame alright...

I got one the other day where the only thing to the email was a subject line that read, "Dear Friend,". No text in the body of the email whatsoever. AND... he sent it several times. Rolling Eyes

Guess he couldn't figure out how to make bcc work or something.

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2010 8:38 pm

MoutonBlanc wrote:

This one is pretty short : http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=185552

Yes, it's short, but it isn't just plain crap. It doesn't really show complete cluelessness on the part of the lad sending it, like the one above, where the mugu clearly thought he could just lop whole paragraphs from an established format without impacting the message content at all. That's admirable, I think. It's that type of innovation, that brand of breathtaking stupidity we're after. Like the ones where a halfwit lad thinks he's being inventive and original. Those are often real beauties.

Anyway yes, please bait him and remember to mention how interested you were by his message. Praise its directness, and tell him how it inspired you were by it to reply. He should always use it.

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2010 9:53 pm

I've got his starter kit (refugee ID, crappy deposit slip). Also, I'm already his Daddy.

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2010 11:40 pm

^^

Incidentally, here's the whole format for anyone who hasn't seen it. This one came from [email protected].

Quote:

Dearest ,

I am writing this mail to you with tears and sorrow from my heart.With due respect trust and humanity, i appeal to you to exercise a little patience and read through my letter i feel quite safe dealing with you in this important business having gone through your remarkable profile, honestly i am writing this email to you with pains, tears and sorrow from my heart, i will really like to have a good relationship with you and i have a special reason why i decided to contact you, i decided to contact you due to the urgency of my situation,My name is Miss. Hope Kipkalya Kones, 25yrs old female and I held from Kenya in West Africa. My father was the former Kenyan road Minister.

He and Assistant Minister of Home Affairs Lorna Laboso had been on board the Cessna 210, which was headed to Kericho and crashed in a remote area called Kajong'a, in western Kenya. The plane crashed on the Tuesday 10th, June,2008. You can read more about the crash through the below site:http://edition.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/africa/06/10/kenya.crash/index.html After the burial of my father, my stepmother and uncle conspired and sold my father's property to an italian Expertrate which the shared the money among themselves and live nothing for me.

One faithful morning, I opened my father's briefcase and found out the documents which he have deposited huge amount of money in one bank in Burkina Faso with my name as the next of kin. I travelled to Burkina Faso to withdraw the money for a better life so that I can take care of myself and start a new life, on my arrival, the Bank Director whom I met in person told me that my father's instuction to the bank is that the money would only be release to me when I am married or present a trustee who will help me and invest the money overseas. I am in search of an honest and reliable person who will help me and stand as my trustee so that I will present him to the Bank for transfer of the money to his bank account overseas.

I have chosen to contact you after my prayers and I believe that you will not betray my trust. But rather take me as your own sister. Though you may wonder why I am so soon revealing myself to you without knowing you, well I will say that my mind convinc ed me that you may be the true person to help me. Moreso, I will like to disclose much to you if you can help me to relocate to your country because my stepmother have threaten to assinate me..

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 4:52 am

I am happy. Very Happy

"Daviv wrote back quickly so I praised him for the short memo. Realised he didn't have a lot of computer-time at the camp.
The reply format-letter was the long version. 2nd canned response.

Cell / mobil phone..............1-904-241-1080 (former "Whistling Pickle")
and my k7 206 for answer machine.
He's my WORRIED SON. yep, that was the sign-off. Told him I had
"heavy tears" in my eyes. Off we go then with this camp-tramp.....

I wonder if he has bumped into Miss Hope Kones. (I hope she has some nice cones but I get a visual in my mind of Madonna's cone-bra) < < Cool

thanks for the pimp-post of Miss Hope's e-addy. Another pen pal for me.
hope-kip-kalya002

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 7:07 am

Raga Man wrote:

Pretty lame alright...

I got one the other day where the only thing to the email was a subject line that read, "Dear Friend,". No text in the body of the email whatsoever. AND... he sent it several times. Rolling Eyes

Guess he couldn't figure out how to make bcc work or something.

Ragaman don't think we've got that species yet.

The Subjector (Incompletia tohellicum): Lad who sends e-mails with Subject line only and no content.

Also from PsycheDelia_Smith

The Immigrant (Migrantia desperandii): Hapless orphan scammer who wants you to help them relocate to your country.

I'll make a bed up for them now shall I?

Quote:

help me to relocate to your country

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 7:32 am

DAVIV. (Nope, not David) responded in 14 hrs. to my ASEM.

@wowwow, if you ever need help with the genus and species, possibly
'hybrids' and named varieities. I learned approx. 3,000 plant names in my 35 years in Landscape profession. Architecture in the last 7 years.
Just offering my help, tho' you are very good with the Latin/Greek names.

I expect to have some real fun with Daviv the "camp-tramp". (I hijacked that expression from psychicbait) gotta give credit

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 7:57 am

For anyone who needs a few live lad addies, I've uploaded a list of the latest ones to hit my catcher account here:

http://www.mediafire.com/?ly0dnzgkifw

These were all active within the last 7 days.

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 12:24 pm

I've started my refugee son Daviv with the training to be a gynecologist.

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 12:57 pm

Brainiac wrote:

@wowwow, if you ever need help with the genus and species, possibly
'hybrids' and named varieities. I learned approx. 3,000 plant names in my 35 years in Landscape profession. Architecture in the last 7 years.
Just offering my help, tho' you are very good with the Latin/Greek names.

Appreciate the offer of help, most of them could do with reviewing as most are a kind of jokey/pun.
Pop over to my Post with your suggestions.

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 1:20 pm

Mmmm.
Camp-tramp.
I have a special subset of 'my' ASEM for camp tramps.
My record is two accounts from one of them.

Maybe this one won´t abandon me when I´m thrown into jail on <snipped> charges.
I can always hope.

Edited-
While I fed the camp tramp into the ASEM, another answered and is even now reading response 2cc, variant 2.
And how bad my memory is getting- the record is not 2 but 3.

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 3:16 pm

@wowwow - If I might... I'd like to offer a suggestion for my new species: Formatinterruptus ragamania.
This would be in keeping with the taxonomic tradition of naming the new species after the discoverer. Very Happy

@Brainiac - I tried the Whistling Pickle number a bunch of times over the past several days and it is always busy now. Crying or Very sad

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2010 3:42 pm

Raga Man wrote:

@wowwow - If I might... I'd like to offer a suggestion for my new species: Formatinterruptus ragamania.
This would be in keeping with the taxonomic tradition of naming the new species after the discoverer. Very Happy

Ragaman ... for you .. it's done Smile

The Subjector (Formatinterruptus ragamania): Lad who sends e-mails with Subject line only and no content.
... and for Braniac
The Whistler (Eardrumus cellicum): Phone lad subjected to the whistling pickle.

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2010 10:06 am

bohigal wrote:

I've started my refugee son Daviv with the training to be a gynecologist.

How do you rate his potential as baiting material? Possible safaris, westie hikes and so on? I'm not baiting him myself, my hands are full. He seems like a good knockabout lad though.

Posted: Thu Jun 17, 2010 7:56 pm

Update on Daviv: I think he's eminently baitable, and good material for mentors/mentees. One bank official and the first lawyer have already been fired. He thinks there's $50 earnest money waiting for him at WU, thanks to Deuzer's original WU forms. He's made 2 trips to the WU and is about to experience Sectrans. Next, the Vault. Here is one of the 5 urgent emails he's sent me today:

Smelling the money, dunce-lad wrote:

Daddy

I received your message, please can you change the name to the James Oghale so the barrister can pick-up the funds for me .

I cannot pick-up the funds because they wont accept refugee ID card .

Please call western union to change it from my name Daviv thunbraye to James Oghale so i can have the funds in my possession tomorrow morning..

Daddy this $50 will really help me as i will eat good food with it and i thank you so much for your loving kindness .

i am waiting for the informations be changed daddy .

your worried son,
daviv

He will soon get the gynaecological exam (I mean test questions, not an actual physical exam). Evil or Very Mad

Not quite a Newb Joined: 09 Jun 2010 Posts: 53

Just got this today

Quote:

From: David Moreno Ortiz

Date: Wed, 16 Jun 2010 14:43:51 -0700

Subject: Your Email ID Was Awarded 1,000,000.00GBP In The Tobacco Online Promo.Send Your:

Names....Address....Tel.....

Couldn't even bother writing the whole message in the body, had to spread it between subject and body haha.

I've been experimenting with replying in weird ways to scammers, especially when they're obnoxious to start with (e.g. typing in all caps, ALL THE TIME JUST LIKE THIS).

Posted: Fri Jun 18, 2010 12:29 pm

^^ I'm a great believer in replying to all-caps in kind. It was discussed here once some time ago, psychologists call this 'mirroring', it's something we subconciously do when forming relationships.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mirroring_%28psychology%29

Since this is an important stage in any bait, it has to be beneficial, and even if it's not, it makes us feel better to annoy him as much as he's annoyed us. You can't lose.

Posted: Fri Jun 18, 2010 1:07 pm

PsycheDelia_Smith

I must be missing something here. What on earth makes you think that this is a scam? It seems so legit to me.

Posted: Fri Jun 18, 2010 5:06 pm

You're clearly out of practise. Where you been? The skeleton coast?