My coming out as a baiter - drrrrrty

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Posted: Wed Mar 31, 2010 1:26 pm

This was pretty much my first bait. Unfortunately our relationship didn't last long enough to meet one another privately, seeing the lad's email address became invalid from one day to the next.

Just to not get you guys confused:

lad
me

So here we go:

Quote:

You can now email me at: [email protected]

Hello Dear,

I am Mr Remy an Accountant with Continental Bank Cotonou, Republic of Benin (WA)

- Mr Remy Fachonou

OMG, it seems we have a gay guyman, or do we? Let's give it a try.

Quote:

Hello Dear,

What was our relationship again?

- Mr Falk Yamuda

He replies! How sweet of him:

Quote:

Hello Dear Mr Falk Yamuda ,

I am MR.Fachonou Remy an Accountant with Continental Bank Cotonou, Republic of Benin. A customer of ours Mrs Rebecca Raoul who happens to be the wife of a late politician intimated me on her intention to invest the sum of US$75M (SEVENTY-FIVE Million U.S. Dollars) in a foreign country, being money left for her family by her late husband who died March 14th 2006 before this new government that took over on April 6th 2006.

I advised her to have patience as I will source for a reliable and trust-worthy investor who can receive,manage and invest the money very well for her.I am soliciting on her behalf for you to help her manage the money properly in your country. You are required to furnish me with your Phone number and address for more clearification.
Thank you my Regards to you and your family
Mr Fachonou Remy
Continental Bank Benin (WA)
Carre 854 ST. Michael Atlantique
Cotonou Republic Du Benin

I'm so excited I get the phone and fax thingy mixed up in my following reply. I attached a picture of Freddie Mercury for his trophy collection.

Quote:

Hello my dearest Fachonou,

I still don't see what our relationship was. How did you come to write me an email? Were my services recommended to you by somebody? I indeed am a business man in the most pleasent branch of all industries. At night I am a drag queen, so I am very busy making loads of money hand over fist.

As a fellow she-male advised me once, you can never have enough money though, so I am very excited in working on you. My work would be worth every single cent and I would do some really fancy work for that amount of money. You and your friend Mrs. Raoul will definitely be very satisfied investing the money in my business, since my motto at all times is: "Keep the customer satisfied". I never fail at that.

But why do you need a fax number? That is so 1980's. It's out of fashion since you can attach any documents you want to an email.

Just so I know whom I am dealing with, I would like you to send me a photo of you and perhaps Mrs. Raoul, too. Before I start working on my partners I want to at least take a close look at them. I attached a photo of me, so you can see how I look like, too. Then you and Mrs. Raoul can decide whether you would like to occupy my services or not. Since she lost her dear husband I feel obliged to render any kind of extra service to her. As I was privileged with the gift of love my whole life it is only fair to share my love with the grieving.

Just keep in touch with me and say hi to Mrs. Raoul, okay?

Please reply soon,
Falk

Sure enough, I receive two random trophy photos representin Mrs. Raoul and him with some other dude in what seems to be the latest of the local tradtional fashion. Use your immagination and think of your random lad, as I am too lazy to load them up on the net (chances are, they're both on Eater somewhere). Now, back to the smut:

Quote:

Hello Dear Mr Falk Yamuda

Many thanks for your interest question, regards to your question that made me to send my picture and Mrs Rebecca Raoul to you and I am one on suit with magazine.

I want to know when you are travelling to Belguim to take delivery of the consignment, l told you that the funds 75 MILLION Dollars was shipped out of Benin to Belguim as A DIPLOMATIC CONSIGNMENT.
As soon as you are ready to travell to Belguim, l will give you the contact of the diplomat so that both of you will arrange on how and when to meet in Belguim.
I want to assure you that whatever you will spend in the course of this transaction will be deducted first as soon as you take delivery before even your 20% commission for your assistance.

This transaction is RISK FREE and also you will not invest the money in a RISKY BUSINESS, NO MATTER THE PROFIT.
If you have any question;please call me +229 95 96 79 54.
Thanks for your understanding and cooperation, while waiting for your urgent mail.
Yours Faithfully,
Mr.Fachonou Remy

Time to get serious:

Quote:

Hi Fachonou.

First of all thanks for the photos. Mrs. Raoul looks really beautiful and you are sure as hell one of the most good-looking men I've ever seen. My compliments, you must be a real gentleman. Therefore I can hardly wait to get down to the nitty-gritty with you, oh yeah.

I am quite surprised to hear the money is being delivered to Belgium. You actually did not inform me about that before, but I'm glad you had your coming out on this issue, before it would have been too late. May I make a different proposal to you though? I will be on a business journey to the Netherlands from Saturday, Aug. 5 to Saturday, Aug. 12. I like doing business with the Dutch, for many of them live a so happily and gay. So maybe you can tell your diplomat friend to come over to Maastricht on Monday, Aug. 7 for talking business with me. I would gladly love to get in touch with his diplomat. Could you please arrange this meeting? Please understand though that I can not grant your diplomat friend any extra service, since diplomats make enough money. So he will have to be comfortable with the basic service which will satisfy him anyway. And, if I may add this, he'll surely have the most satisfying time in his life after spending an hour or two with me.

But you have to always remember we professionals only grant full access after payment, so he better wave a bundle of money. Sorry for sounding demanding here, but it's the way Westerners do business. I think you will understand, right?

Until then, adios hot stud.

Desperately waiting for your mail,
Falk Yamuda

p.s.: What position do you prefer? Let me know and I will gladly satisfy you all.

He just doesn't get the point. What a moron. Anyways:

Quote:

Dear FALK,
Thanks for your mail and the contents well noted.
You have to contact the diplomat so that both of you will arrange if he will bring the consignment to holland or not.
If i am to say, l will advice that you travell to Belguim to take delivery of the consignment.
I want to assure you that whaterver you will spend in the course of this transaction will be deducted first as soon as you take delivery of the consignment before even your commission for your assistance.
i am waiting for your urgent responses so that l will know your position in this matter.
Thanks for your understanding and cooperation
Yours faithfully,
Fachonou.

How should I know that my next adios would actually be for real? Where art thou, my dear Fachonou?????

Quote:

Hi Fachonou,

Well, I'd really suggest your diplomat meet me in Maastricht though, because I have a tight schedule to stick to, seeing ours is not the only business I do. I also have my other customers I am visiting on a monthly basis. I can't afford to displease them, as they pay me well also, but surely not as much as you guys on a long shot. Anyway, please provide me with an email address I can contact your colleague so I can arrange a little private meeting with him. Just tell him he will not regret meeting me in Maastricht and tell him to bring some money along too, since it is my business to do some hot professional business with him.

My position on this business is the one you, your friend or Mrs. Raoul prefer most, since I want to make sure you are satisfied to the absolute climax with my services. Just tell me what the position should be and let me handle the rest. Just one more question: Are you as excited as I am about all this? I just can't wait to meet your friend and get in touch with his diplomat.

Adios hot stud,
Falk

From that point on the MAILER DAEMON would pop up!!!! This could have been serious business, damn it!

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