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 "Peace be unto you!"

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 31, 2004 1:07 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Here follows my communcation with the cancer-stricken, partially paralysed and recently widowed Mrs Luz Stella.

----- Original Message -----
From: <[email protected]>
To: <undisclosed-recipients:>
Sent: Tuesday, August 31, 2004 11:04 AM

Dear Sir/Madam,

From Mrs.Luz Stella,

I am Mrs.Luz Stella Castillo Taborda. person from Colombia undergoing
treatment. I am married to Dr. Castillo Tarboda who worked with Malaysia
embassy in South Africa for nine years before he died in the year 2000.We
were married for eleven years without a child.He died after a brief illness
that lasted for only four days. Before his death we were both born again
Christians. Since his death I decided not to re-marry or get a child outside
my matrimonial home which the Bible is against.When my late husband was
alive he deposited the sum of$15.7.Million (Fifteen Million six hundred
thousand U.S.Dollars) with one finance/security company in EUROPE.

Presently,this money is still with the Security Company.Recently,my Doctor
told me that I would not last for the next three months due to cancer
what disturbs me most is my partial paralysis. Having known my condition
I decided to donate this fund to a church/mosque or better still a
individual that will utilize this money the way I am going to instruct here

I want a church/Mosque or individual that will use this to fund
and widows propagating the word of God and to ensure that the house of God
is maintained. They said blessed is the hand that giveth. I took this
because I don't have any child that will inherit this money and my husband's
relatives are not Christians and I don't want my husband's hard earned money
to be mis-used by unbelievers.

I don't want a situation where this money will be used in an ungodly
the reason for taking this bold decision. I am not afraid of death hence
I know where I am going. I know that I am going to be in the bossom.If you
will be of assistance, I will surely appreciate and thank you for your
in giving me this help. Waiting for your urgent response.

Thank you and God bless.

Note:PLease reply me at this email address:[email protected]

Yours sincerely,
Mrs.Luz Stella Castillo Taborda.

Dear Mrs Luz Stella

Peace be unto you, in your rightful journey to the bossom. I myself have
been searching with a yearning heart since hearing the divine echo for the bossoms of Christ. Your message gives me hope, that they exist, just as
welcoming and ample as my visions had promised.

Furthermore, His sweet mercy has allowed you in your difficult time the use
of your typing finger, despite the partial paralysis of which you complain.
In this, we can take succour from a deliberate act of God: He in His wisdom
has reserved for you the power to fund his worldly work before you are drawn
finally into the folds of his blessed cleavage.Your prayers/fasting were/was
not in vain, and your recognition that getting a child outside your
matrimonial home, which the church is against, doubtlessly merited a special
entry in His Holy ledger of righteous actions. In fact, getting children
outside of the matrimonial home, or within it, is often a secular offence to
boot - an oversight which has more than once cost me a degree of liberty.

You have done well to find me, concealed as I am behind a veil of
impropriety. Does the Saviour not counsel us to climb every mountain, in
disguise? Better to test my piety, I have taken to moving among the unsaved,
the more to do His work. I have been recently employed as a female
impersonator in Soho, where, due to difficulties in ping-pong ball
projection, my cover had been almost blown. With the Lord's help, I have
overcome this problem, as in a vision I beheld his Son in all his glory
propelling them from his fundament. Taking inspiration from this, I have
even begun to inscribe brief psalms on my projectiles, whose receipt and
digestion has proven a big hit with the assorted gentlemen clientele in
whose souls I have so much earnest interest.

Occasionally I compose my own sermons, taken from the words of modern day
prophets of the Word. The Lord's wisdom is boundless, his fingers touch all
things, in all can his design be found. Making use of the loudhailer I have
procured as a result of an ecclesiastical fracas in Oxford Street, I have
begun to address the Unsaved directly from the upper deck of a London tour
bus. The balls I save for the night - they are sermons shot from my inmost
self. Yet my bus-bound homilies have thus far escaped the prying hands of
the Law, and I am yet free to spread the word of Saints Icke and Manson, as
well as morsels swept from the overflowing feast table of Brother LaVey, God
roast him. The kingdom is within us, as Saint luke remarked to his
catamites, and on this rock I have built my church. Only last night I was
praying to the Lord for some means to realise my latest vision - a tasteful
burlesque of the Visitation of Saint Theresa with a nautical theme. Now I
have my answer. Praised be His name!

Your donation would be kindly recieved, as I am in urgent need of vestments,
a church building, and a fresh supply of perfectly smooth table tennis
balls. Also, I feel a gurney - the ones they use in maternity wards - would
be indispensable to my work, but they don't come cheap. Perhaps a million
pounds would secure one from the impecunious brethren who toil daily in our
collapsing hospitals? By the way, I would like to know which proffessional
website directed you to my unique services - if it was through my hallowed
portal, perhaps I could refund your considerable credit card bill, along
with a few tastefully executed colour photographs for your private
enjoyment. For my peace of mind to be satsified, I ask only that you return
to me a photgraph of yourself, holding in your good hand a small white ball
inscribed with, say, a passage from the Sermon on the Mount. I often like
myself to consider the lilies as I inscribe the orbs of the Lamb in the line
of my mission.

I look forward to recieving the bounty of your goodwill, secure in the hope
that I will finally be able to erect the most hallowed Church/Mosque this
side of Jerusalem. Look out for me on TV -

Yours in breathless ecstasy,

Mother Money-Shott

(Harold Catheter)
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