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 Do your baiting techniques ever spill into your real life?

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Jammy
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2009 9:06 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

A little background:

As part of my job, I recently had to communicate with a person who does ordering for our company. This is a very annoying person who is generally regarded as an officious, overbearing busybody. For example, she is prone to canceling, changing and questioning orders that she has no actual authority to question/change/cancel, etc. Pretty much everybody hates having to deal with her.

Anyway, in my latest exchange with her, I found myself feigning misunderstanding, questioning trivial points, asking her to elaborate on pretty much everything she wrote, asking her to resend forms, instructions. Most people might call my behavior passive aggressive. But I was genuinely surprised (and kind of delighted) to realize that I was using baiting techniques on her, to control the situation, to make her the annoyed one rather than myself. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have done this before I started baiting.

So, it has me wondering: Have any of you experienced cases where you find yourself using your baiting techniques in real life? Was this a conscious choice, or did you just slip into it?
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devil_woman
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2009 9:12 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^ WOW what a good idea I can think of a few people whow ould 'enjoy' baiter tactics. Laughing

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Branwen
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2009 9:23 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Yes. 'I am trying my best, and it is your fault that I am not succeeding.'

Context: every sticky situation dealing with officialdom.

Conscious choice!

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Nanny Ogg
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2009 9:30 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

My hubby and I have been known to say
" it sounds 100% risky free" when we're dubious about something

Maybe hanging around here has made me over cautious.
I had a phone call the other day saying they were the fraud dept of one of my credit cards, asking did I have the card, what was the number on the back,what was my security question.
So being aware of phising/ fraud/ id theft I said the card wasnt to hand.
Then phoned back through customer services to double check



It was genuine and my card had been cloned, the big clue to the card company was that I hadnt used the card for nearly 6 months.
They'd blocked the payment already (for designer trainers- again big clue. my sons have BIG feet so can't trainers from bog standard online stores )

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Eliza_Doolittle
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2009 9:32 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I teach at a college and begin EVERY lesson by writing little notes on the side of the chalkboard...

Chapter we are currently on

What assignments are posted online for them to do
Due dates for assignments

Upcoming assignments that will be given and day they will be given.

Upcoming exam
What chapters exam covers

So, one Tuesday I was really sick and had to call in. The exam was scheduled for the Thursday. I posted online - blackboad, google mail that they have access to, and a big note on the front of the door saying the exam was rescheduled for the following Tuesday.

So on Wednesday some dumbass calls the office over and over and over stating that they have no idea when the exam for my class will be and that I do not give my students notice about anything - they are all lost and would appreciate me informing them about what's going on Rolling Eyes

Student calls EVERY hour all day.

I was busy and never checked my voicemail until 1 a.m. so I never returned the call from the secretary telling me this student was calling.

Next class = Thursday - - I come in with a stack of papers. (Dumbass student had not left her name when she called) I said "Ok everyone clear your desks. "

They were like - WTF??

I said - it's exam day - don't you remember?

THey were like - NO NO NO NO - you said it will be postponed until Tuesday - - I said... I don't remember that? You guys are just trying to pull a fast one on me - get out your pencils and clear your desks. They were like - NO you posted it in email and blackboard and a big note on the door - why are you now saying it's today?

I said - Did ANYONE not get the notice? DId ANYONE here not know when the exam is going to be? Who here did NOT get a notice that the exam is Tuesday?

NO one raised their hand.

I said - so everyone of you mean to tell me you got a message that the exam is Tuesday? Everyone is like - yes....

I said - so who is the dumbass who called the office yesterday every single hour saying that they would appreciate it if I would let people know what's going on and communicate with students so they didn't just have to guess what's going on in this class?

They were like - NO way - no one did that - - I said - one of you did..

LMAO.

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Jammy
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2009 9:57 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^Eliza, how brilliant and devious!

I hope the non-dumbass students in your class appreciated your ruse once you explained it to them! I also hope your office has caller id, so you could identify the dumbass (now lying dumbass) in question!
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Ima Baeder
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2009 10:05 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^ I find it rather unprofessional, actually. Confused

My baiting has spilled into my real life in the fact that I forget that I don't have to use a fake name and email account for everything in life. My husband put a family picture up on facebook and I almost freaked out. Laughing

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NickTheCop
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 14, 2009 10:08 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I answer wrong numbers with, "Yes, I'm Mr [name]".

Absolutely not a conscious choice. It's even more awkward when it's a first name. Apparently non-lads aren't terrible impressed with "Mr Joe" or "Mr David". Confused

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Carlos Dominquez
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 12:06 am Reply with quoteBack to top

When ever I am filling in a document I have a habit of putting a baiter address I use. Just the other day I put a baiter address for a contact and I put my US registered number too! - Online used for baiting.

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PostPosted: Sun Nov 15, 2009 1:56 am Reply with quoteBack to top

It's not a baiting technique, but I've learned a few things here that I am finding useful in RL.

I'm on the organizing committee for a new charitable foundation, and at our meeting today I suggested we at least need an email address, even before we get a website. One of the other people there suggested [email protected], and I said that we could get a domain of xxxfoundation.org and use it just for emails until we can get the funds to get a real website at that domain. They hadn't known you could have a domain just for emails, and I said, "Lads do it all the time." Of course, then I had to explain who "lads" are. Laughing

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 16, 2009 3:15 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Great story, Eliza! Laughing
I've played the "good cop-bad cop" routine with co-workers to get difficult customers to believe the truth about what the other person has said. Depending on how the first person interacted the first time, the other co-worker would play the opposite. Worked like a charm. We had the solution to their problem, it was just a way of convincing them that they should trust the judgment of the other, and the unsaid, "stop wasting our time." Laughing

I have been baited by innumerable people on this very forum in real life! (who shall go unnamed-you know who you are.) And I was even recently baited by Rover, to renew my Premium Membership! Laughing

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Nelsonsbattle
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 7:36 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I use the word "modality" a lot.

I had a customer the other day who explaining about a special engineering tool and he was blindsided when I asked, "What special modality do you want to use with this tool?

Then I suggested to our purchasing department, who cancel orders which still have outstanding deliveries on them, that they "should reconsider their purchase order maintenance modality".

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Ghost
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 7:55 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I know in the past a few people had to "quit" eater and baiting because their personality changed and not for the better. Dealing with lads 24/7 can have that effect. Especially when you think baiting equals slapping. It can also be frustrating not to mention very insulting when every lad is trying to steal your money by telling you some of the dumbest stuff you have every heard and is putting in zero effort. Then it's disconcerting when you realize it actually works on some people.

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FrumpyBB
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 10:18 am Reply with quoteBack to top

You learn somehow how to manipulate people - the analogy is there. You have a goal to achieve in mind and you try to motivate people again and again, varying the "a bigger reward will wait for you afterwards"-idea. I believe that´s a good thing because it works everywhere in real life.

The "bad" thing is that baiting means lying. This burns many people out soon. What builds my baiting spirits up again and again and again is reading through scamwarners.com (seeing that the scammers really deserve everything you can do with them!) and the exchange with other baiters from/on Eater. This way it has been working very fine for me.

The rest has all been said - the little techie things that are indeed useful for real life (Skype numbers, using mass mail templates, understanding the scam anatomy, educating people about that). I think this hobby has many positive aspects.

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 10:56 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I find myself better at phone when I have administrative or equivalent problems.
The last one was about an undued electricity bill.
I obtained what I want, but before baiting I would have lost my nerves and sent them to hell Very Happy
The same with telemarketers.
I also seem to be better when arguing with my fiancee Laughing
This is the good side.

On another hand I get pretty paranoid.
For example, I received last month a warning letter from my credit card provider.
My card number was among a database that was hacked, so my card had to be cancelled and I would receive a new one for free (maybe some Europeans of you guys received the same letter).
I had to give a call to a free phone number, give my card number and a code that was given in the letter.
I imagined someone found my card number and address, sent me this fake letter and was trying to get my PIN.
It was 100% genuine, but still I surfed the whole interweb half an hour and gave 2 phone calls to my banker to be sure it was effectively not a fake...

Still, as Frumpy and others already mentionned it, I was already careful about my informations on the net, but it's really better now, which is one of the good things to take from baiting to RL.

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 11:28 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I find the tinfoil hat comes in handy in RL.

A resort on another continent wanted my cc details to make a booking, the wife was amazed to watch me get Ip adresses and a Whois lookup on their website before I'd do anything so rash. How did I know they were who they said they were? - they could've been lads with a cloned website.

Even then I ended up faxing them my cc details rather than email it to a potentially insecure mailbox.

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Jammy
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 19, 2009 10:51 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Ghost wrote:
I know in the past a few people had to "quit" eater and baiting because their personality changed and not for the better. .


That's a scary thought, but it makes a lot of sense. It's like a cop who develops a really cynical and bitter outlook on life from his constant encounters with the worst of society.

As for me, if I have to "quit" eater and baiting it will be because it's so addictive, and can be such a time drain. If I ever find myself checking my baiter email accounts first thing in the morning, before my actual real life email account, that will be a warning sign! Laughing

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soylent green
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 20, 2009 1:51 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Having hung out with a bunch of "ex-baiters" I can vouch for the fact that some of the baiters change their personalities for the worse.

It is like doing drugs - some people are inherently weak, and cannot handle the strains that come with playing another persona on the net. It gets to them, they treat their fellow baiters as they do the scammers and eventually they retire battle scarred for life.

So - if you find baiting techniques taking over your life it might be the time to step away from it all while you still can ...

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PostPosted: Fri Nov 20, 2009 3:04 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I don't think this really answers your question, but I do find myself, when
on a website that insists on your personal info, registering as

Angus MacTavish
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Lagos, Nigeria

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PostPosted: Fri Nov 20, 2009 5:11 am Reply with quoteBack to top

@Jammy:
Quote:
As for me, if I have to "quit" eater and baiting it will be because it's so addictive, and can be such a time drain. If I ever find myself checking my baiter email accounts first thing in the morning, before my actual real life email account, that will be a warning sign! Laughing
Ut-oh Embarassed

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Why is it so difficult to receive money from you.I am having a hunch that you are delibrately making it difficult for me.I want you to remember all the problems you have put me through from your first bank transfer to the second one to our London account to this very western Union that you sent more than a week ago. You are putting me through all kind of stress just to receive money from you.

kindly please for God sake re-send it again in a proper way

you are making things so complicated for me...i can no longer condole all this stress you are making me pass through

Your are so honest i like the way you act.

you are playing games with me, but I still want to beleive in you because I have no much choices right now.
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Jammy
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 20, 2009 5:44 am Reply with quoteBack to top

^Knotty Pine. Yeah, I know. I chose that example because it's so true Embarassed

soylent green wrote:
if you find baiting techniques taking over your life it might be the time to step away from it all while you still can ...


In my example above, I only thought of it as a positive effect. It let me take control of a RL situation that would otherwise have aggravated me. However, what you say is definitely food for thought! I guess if I ever find myself doing it when it's not warranted, or with a friend or loved one, I'll step quietly away from the keyboard.

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PostPosted: Fri Nov 20, 2009 11:28 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
It's like a cop who develops a really cynical and bitter outlook on life from his constant encounters with the worst of society.


Embarassed I'm very cynical about everything and anything, means I don't tend to enjoy things I should
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 20, 2009 3:23 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

If someone annoys me I can find myself muttering a mordant "REMAIN BLESS" under my breath, while really hoping the sky falls down on their head.

Nothing unusual there you might think, except the "REMAIN BLESS" bit is in caps lock when I think it. Shocked Wink

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2009 2:13 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

All interesting observations... Cool

Not too long after joining Eater, I read a piece of advice our very own Gomer Pyle offered a new member who had come to a standstill with his lad. It always stuck with me. Smile

"You're learning to bargain from a position of weakness and eventually take control. It's a good life skill to learn."

Jammy wrote:

Quote:
Have any of you experienced cases where you find yourself using your baiting techniques in real life?


Did the turnaround technique work with her....did she finally get it?

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 21, 2009 4:15 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

@Elisa DL. I hope you were just kidding about your test. Reprisals and mass punishments have no place in education. Announcing something and doing another is false teaching.

@Ghost. I now know why you are a mod. I've had to alter my baiting and do not slap anymore. I could actually feel what it was doing to my blood pressure and it carried into my RL. Now I ignore my lads until they plead with me. My biggest slap is "It appears that the Evangelism Committee did not approve of your submissions.".

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