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 Safari hat trick-Lad still in Abuja, needs to get moving!

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Wurzgnubbel
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PostPosted: Mon Oct 26, 2009 7:37 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

This is wonderful! There were about 10 lads lads year waiting for a shuttlebus to SSC from the hotel who spent a lot of money staying at the hotel, or so the receptionist has told our lad!

Splendid baiting, y'all! The receptionist should really be thankful for all the lads sent there.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:45 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Laughing That call was so sweet, Jane. I live for moments like this. Very Happy
I like the way he started out a few days ago.."We drove and drove for 4 days..." And in this call, "We drove for 5 days, 6 days, 7 days..." Laughing
It just gets worse and worse. But, if he has a room, at least he will get his bath. Tomorrow may be a different story. Another 200 miles to go. I hope he has enough cash for the trip left. Wink Very Happy

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 3:49 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Jane and I woke up H3ctor tonight, 3:30AM his time.
I played [email protected] Rh0d3s, Bernie's wife. There is a slight change of plans regarding the shuttle bus from what is reported in the 55c thread. OOPS!
We are going to send him a map, and hopefully talk him into hiring a taxi.
The road starts 2km from Burkina border, and is about 50 miles to the end of the road. This road does in fact exist, and I sure hope we can get him to take it. 55C is 10 miles upriver from there. Smile

The map we are emailing is here:
http://www.4shared.com/file/143957702/ef45319c/konkobiri02.html

Here is tonight's phonecall. I was playing myghanaradio.com in the background. I know the lad heard it, as Jane could hear it, but it didn't come out on this recording.
http://www.4shared.com/file/143957078/459e58c0/hectorparakou10-27-3am.html
Enjoy! Very Happy

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 6:55 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I always wonder what the good citizens of Parakou think every time another travel-stained and broke mugu wanders into town asking about SSC. Hopefully they can see the funny side and go "great - another idiot!" as they double their prices for water, hotels, taxis etc.

Top baiting and congratulations on the safari!

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 8:30 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Nice call, the music is there in the background, on my left hand speaker behind the lady's voices.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:53 am Reply with quoteBack to top

The JJ call with him is great Very Happy at last a lad who can express himself and share safari stories - HONESTLY, 9 hours! Laughing we drove and drove and drove. And all those receptionists, they have no clue about Mister B3rnie at all (#shakes head#).
Wow, he can talk...he does not stop. Imagine being there with him in RL Surprised

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 12:07 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I can't believe this. He is staying again in Parakou with hope that the shuttle box - which he knows is broken - is coming to get him today. More complaints in the mail.

Quote:
1rina,
I must tell you i am highly and completely disappointed with the way Mr. and Mrs. B3rnie treted me.
They knew i was coming; i gave them an earlier notice of my arrival,why will they come up with the excuses that shuttle bus is bad and under repair or somewhere else.
This is unfair and highly unacceptable to me, this same man gave us a wrong map nd address in Nigeria and we drove for 6good days without any luck to locate your whereabout in camp in Nigeria, he has started again here in Benin.What kind of joke is that?.
Does thses peopel have human feeling at all?.
Do you realize i left Cotonou city yesterday 6.00AM and go here at 2.00PM on schedule?
Remember is same excuses that Mr. Berne gave me when we were in Gombe, Nigeria.
I am not happy with all this and feelling very sick here
I got the map and took it to the taxi men,I have checked with local taxi they do not know where your camp is,none of them know where you are.So it is needless to use a taxi.
However,in order to satisfactorily convinced that Bernie is a liar according to what they told me in this hotel,I will stay and pay in this hotel again today and i will await the shuttle bus they promised today again.
Alternatively,i am sure Bernie has staffs,ask him to send one of their staff to come and pick me.Atleast their staffs knows the direction very well.
I will tell you one thing 1rina, That man and his wife are not straightforward people,this will be find out if they do not send shuttle bus or any of their staff here to me today.
They told me both of them use delay tactics to waste people time here at the hotel, i did confirm this from the receptionist,they are liars.
I will not tolerate an further excuse if they fail to pick me today.
I am sick and could not sleep well,please call me.
H3ctor


Good grief Confused

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 12:11 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
Imagine being there with him in RL


I think if he saw a white face he'd fall down and worship!

Quote:
Does thses peopel have human feeling at all?.


As much as he does.

Quote:
I am not happy with all this and feelling very sick here


AW diddums! Twisted Evil

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 2:46 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
I got the map and took it to the taxi men,I have checked with local taxi they do not know where your camp is,none of them know where you are.So it is needless to use a taxi.


[email protected] Rh0d3s will remedy that. He went to the wrong taximan, who doesn't know where Northwest Benin is. [email protected] will send Hect0r a map that also shows where Parakou is. She will ignore his request for a pickup by other staff here. Wink Very Happy

edit: oops! Only one small problem...I need Hect0r's email addy pm'ed to me. I don't have it. Doc or Jane, wanna PM that to me? Smile

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 3:05 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

PM coming.....

I spoke with him on the phone just a few minutes ago. He's definitely staying another night in Parakou.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 3:12 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Wouldnt it be great to be in direkt contact with the reception of the hotel.

Just to hear there story. I know it isnt possible but still.
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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 3:45 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Jane's lad wrote:
Does thses peopel have human feeling at all?


Oh, the irony......

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 4:12 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Like her husband, Bernie, Gloria is also very helpful. Very Happy

Quote:
Dear Mr. Hect0r,



I'm so sorry that there was miscommunication between yourself and the taxi man.

I assumed a taxi driver would recognize the towns in Northwest Benin. Here

is a map which shows a bigger picture of where we are in relation to Parak0u.

Parak0u is at the bottom of the map, and 55C at the top. I hope this helps,

and will allow your driver to find us easily now. The access road is approximately

2km from the Burkina-Faso border. Have a nice trip, as the weather is fine today

here. We will expect you later tonight.



Warmest regards,

Gloria


Gloria attached another map, and her map skills are not much better than Bernie's Smile:
http://www.4shared.com/file/144105463/8743e3cd/SSCBeninParakou.html

Just in: JJ reports that H3ct0r was quite abusive in his language regarding Bernie. He even called him a f*****! That kind of thing just won't help matters. It's a good thing Bernie isn't hearing this today.
Don't you worry, H3ctor. We will work this all out. Laughing

edit: to comment to Marcus01.
Marcus01 said:
Quote:
Wouldnt it be great to be in direkt contact with the reception of the hotel.

Just to hear there story. I know it isnt possible but still.


In fact, it is possible, as we have the hotel phone number. But after 10s of lads arriving there, and them not figuring out that they are scammers and calling the police, I'm not sure if telling them anything about what baiters are doing to these guys would be to our advantage. It's funny hearing that the staff are calling us frudsters, and challenging to keep the lads going after they hear this from the hotel staff. Who are they to believe, the baiter character or the hotel staff that are 200 miles from the 55C? There are about three other hotels that I found on a recent search on a previous safari. Perhaps we could send the lads to a different hotel next time, and see if they get hassled for being scammers?
Smile [/b]

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 4:49 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Update. Lots of tears from H3ctor, as he responds to Gloria. I'm sure he didn't even have time to show the map to anyone. What a crybaby. Very Happy

Quote:
Dear Mrs. Gloria,



The taxi here are illiterate, they dont know how to get there, even

with the map.

I wont risk my life on journey with taxi drivers that do not know the

direction. I have had enough disappointment from your husband.

I notified him of my arrival here two days before, he was the one that

directed me to come to xxxxxxxx Hotel in Parakou and i was there on

time, i was so shocked that he wrote and tell me the shuttle bus has

gone to Niamey and that if i could sleep overnight, he will send me

the shuttle today, but on the contrary you said on phone this morning

that the shuttle is broken,so who do i believe.

The receptionist at the xxxxxxxx Hotel gave a bad recommendation on

your husband,he said he has a way of wasting people time, making them

to wait and wait,giving them excuses by telling them that shuttle will

arrive, he said several clients were here last year and neither Mr.

Bernie nor shuttle bus came. This is very bad thing for your company

I decided to rent the room today again at the hotel to see and verify

if what they said was true.Now it is 5.00PM, there no shuttle bus and

i have not heard from Mr. Bernie.Perhaps he intentionally dcided to

avoid me,since he has failed again today

I think this is very very unfair for your reputation.

I expect and will advise that you send one of your staffs that knows

the road and direction very well to come and pick me,then together he

will be able to direct a taxi.

Regards,

Hector


Laughing Now we have to find him a literate taxi man? Laughing

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 5:06 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^^1rina just got a variation of the same complaint but with better typos Laughing

Quote:
1rina,
In addition to our telephone conversation.
Mrs. Gloria sent me another map, do you know something, the taxi drivers here are illeterate,they do not know the road and direction, i am not ready to risk my life in village bushy road with a taxi driver that know does not know where to go.I have had enough disappointment and pains from Mr. B3rnie already.
Be informed that i have rented the room at the hotel again for tonight.. This makes it two das that i am here.
I have still not heard from Mr. B3rnie, i guess he internationally decided not to email me becuase he knew he has lied to me, yesterday he sent me an email telling me that if i could sleep, he will send a shuttle to pick me up today, it is now 5.00PM here and still no sign of any shuttle bus or anyone,by this i will assume he is what they told me he was.
I want you to find Mr. B3rnie at all cost and take it up strongly with him, ask him why did he do that.
Irina,dont you get the point, tell them how important i am to you,tell them i am your love and show and exhibit how unhappy you are for them not taking necessary action to get me out of here.
I am sure when you give them your instruction, they must carry it out immediately.
The instructin now is that, have them send one of their staffs that knows the road and direction to come pick me at xxx Hotel, Parakou,room 317.
I am sure with one of their staff with me,we will be able to locate the camp with a taxi.
Loving you
H3ctor


H3ctor, um, I'll think about it and get back to you at about 3:00 am your time Wink

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 5:18 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Would he have a phone in his room? Or would the front desk guy wake him up for you? I bet if you upset him at 3AM to the point where he wakes up other guests, they might be less lenient on him when it comes to his bill.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 6:30 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
I want you to find Mr. B3rnie at all cost and take it up strongly with him


clapping clapping clapping

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 7:47 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
Irina,dont you get the point, tell them how important i am to you,


He does have a point he is so amusing.Laughing


Quote:
tell them i am your love and show and exhibit how unhappy you are for them not taking necessary action to get me out of here. Embarassed Cool


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 7:48 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

This is so much fun reading Very Happy

I'd never even really realized that those guys would think of asking the hotel staff about SSC. How I'd like to be able to overhear such a conversation Laughing

Great job!

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 9:24 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Hotel staff near the wonderful 55C pickup locations often tell blatant lies about 55Cs and Bernie. Mad This is normal for impatient guests, who don't have the common decency to accept breakdowns of transportation. They cry and scream to front desk people, who have nothing to do with 55Cs at all, and 55Cs take all the blame. They hardly ever bring enough cash to continue the journey on their own, without being "picked" like little children on the school bus. Frankly, Gloria is sick of this crap, and she wrote a long rant to H3ctor about this very thing, but Just Jane has an even more wicked and evil idea to drop into H3ctor's email box first for tomorrow. Very Happy Maybe we'll wake him up again tonight, too?? Smile

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 11:20 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

No word from our lad at the 55C inbox. Sounds like he is very mad at Bernie.

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 12:23 am Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^He should be! Laughing Laughing Laughing

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 2:08 am Reply with quoteBack to top

If I ever wake up one morning in Benin, after a crazy night, I may just have to go to Parakou (with my own transport) and find this hotel where all the lads have been staying at. This is good reading. Very Happy

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 2:25 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Oh my, H3ctor got a lot of abuse tonight. Gloria sent this right after she sent him the second map:

Quote:
Dear H3ctor,

Just after sending that mail, I think we've got a great alternative for you. We do have a staff member coming your way today. Sven, our poolboy, was coming up here after being on his holiday. He is in his Range Rover and needed to stop in Parakou to go pick up some chemicals. Those models were partying really hard again last night and managed to dump 50 boxes of gelatin in the hot tub. We awoke this morning to an absolute mess. I haven't see so much gelatin since my grandma got that 'Joys of Jello' cookbook. He has to get an extra shock treatment to get the jello lumps out of the pool pump, so naturally I caught him right before he left to tell him to swing by to get you.

Anyway, if you are still there he'll be by at approximately 5:15pm. I told him to pick up some Cristal champagne and hors d'ourves in a cooler packed just for you. I hope that makes up for all the inconvenience you've been through these last weeks.

We have the best suite reserved for you when you arrive.

Gloria


Of course this mail never went to the lad, but I faked it up to look like a forwarded mail with this added:

Quote:
Dear H3ctor,

What happened to you? Sven contacted me to say you weren't waiting for him. He asked at the desk and they didn't know who you were. He hung around for hours and then he had to get back on the road. Have you left the hotel?

We went through a lot of trouble to arrange this. Why didn't you show up?

Gloria


An hour later, Gloria followed up with this Shocked (thanks Slappy for your poison pen!)

Quote:
Dear Mr. H3ctor,

Since my last mail I have been thinking about all that's happened and I have to get this off my chest!

Your behavior is incredibly childish, and not what I would expect from a mature businessman. Irina is going to be mad as hell when I tell her the bullshit and accusations you have written to me. Real men do not act like like you at all. I seriously doubt that you even had the time to go outside the hotel and find a "literate" taxi driver. You are lying to me, and you and I both know it. So, don't even try to convince me of that shit. Saying that taking any taxi here in Benin is "risking your life" is pure crap, too. Benin is a very safe African country, and I have never heard of a single incident of anyone dying from taking a taxi here. That's an incredibly stupid and dead wrong thing to say about the pleasant travel experiences in Benin. That kind of thing may happen in Nigeria, but not here in Benin. I just love the Benin people, and I will not let you denigrate them in any way.

Then I send you Sven and you don't even bother to show up. I had to pay him overtime to hang around there with a thumb up his ass while you were off doing who knows what. We've gone above and beyond to try to accommodate you and you have the nerve to call us names and spread false rumors about this fine business that we've been nurturing all these years.

It's true that some of our guests were not picked up by our shuttles last year. We did have inferior equipment, but have recently upgraded our trucks and buses. The guests that the hotel receptionist are talking about failed to have patience or resolve to wait. Some of them had other appointments to attend to, and decided to leave on their own. Others were late and missed the shuttles
entirely. This was unfortunate, and we had no intention of wasting anyone's time. The hotel staff of your hotel only seem to remember the "bad experiences" of our 5SC guests, as only those attracted any attention. And I see no reason for them to badmouth our company, when they have never been to 5SC, never been to Pendjari Parc, or even know where it is or how to get here. Their only knowledge of us is the bad reports by impatient, complaining guests. Do you want to believe someone who lives 200 miles from where we are, and has never been here, the receptionist? That's ridiculous.

Maybe 5imba 5afari Camps will stop recommending their hotel to our guests from now on. Ask the manager how he feels about that. Go ahead. Ask him. He will stand to lose many room reservations, and many meals, but if he's going to say awful lies about us, we will just take our business elsewhere! It's also very bad etiquette to say bad things and give bad recommendations about another guest services organization. We have never said and would never say anything bad about xxxxHotel, so why do they say bad things about us, because of a few inpatient guests of ours? Ask him if he would like to lose our business. I'm sure there are plenty of hotels in Parakou who would treat 5SC much better than they are doing.

I have a very helpful suggestion for you, H3ctor. You can either get off your butt from the internet cafe chair, and go find yourself a "literate" taxi driver, or find an "illiterate" one, and be the navigator yourself. You have adequate maps. Or, you can take a bus north on the main highway, called RNIE2, till you reach the town of Kandifo 190km north of Parakou. Get off the bus there at Kandifo. Find a taxi driver or bus to take you WEST toward Tobaga and the Burkina-Faso border area and to the Pendjari access road on the first map I sent you. If there is a bus from Kandifo to Tobaga, get off at Tobaga and find a taxi driver or motorbike to go the rest of the way here. Simple. Easy. A child can and has managed it before in the past. I'm sure a real man like you and manage to get here, too.

I do not like your disparaging remarks and insults about my husband, B3rnie, either, Mr. H3ctor, so you better cut out that shit immediately or I'll not be giving you the free champagne luncheon or flowers that all guests receive on arrival here. Just who the hell do you think you are, anyway? The King of Siam? You are acting like a four year old girl. You are not the only guest that we are taking care of at the moment, you know. If you act at least as well as a well-mannered thirteen year old young man, you just might be able to get here by yourself.

Warmest regards,

Gloria


Slappy will be posting the long phone call we made. I do think that H3ctor was starting to cry at the end or maybe he was only faking it like me. Laughing

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 2:47 am Reply with quoteBack to top

A tip-top performance by Just Jane again. Very Happy I was typing a few prods to poke him with and playing some music in the background by a famous artist. The music fits in well; do you know the artist? Smile He might have have shed one tear in the end. That was fun. Enjoy!

http://www.4shared.com/file/144251708/859b4913/hectorparakou10282009.html

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