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 I was refused a loan

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thomas-the-tank
Elite Baiter


Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 1087
Location: Wherever I want the lads to think I am


PostPosted: Fri Aug 14, 2009 11:03 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

His Grace, Bishop Robert James of the Church of Christ in England, offered:
Lad wrote:
WE WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT WE HAVE THE CALLING FROM THE LORD TO HELP THOSE WHO ARE IN NEED AND IN FINANCIAL PROBLEM,BY GIVEN OUT LOAN TO ANY INDIVIDUAL OR ORGANISATION.

IF YOU ARE INTERESTED KINDLY CONTACT BISHOP ROBERT JAMES WITH THE DETAILS BELOW.

NAME: BISHOP ROBERT JAMES

I therefore replied, since I am always in need of money:
I wrote:
Dear Bishop

Will Your Grace please inform me more of the doctrines and beliefs of the Church of Christ? Do you, for example, believe in the Apostolic Succession, as well as the Immaculate Conception? Or are you perhaps convinced of the need for the Arian Neo-Trinitarian doctrines?

In any case, I would like to receive a small loan of about $5,328 dollars from you, as I owe this much to a prostitute here.

It took about three weeks, but the reply has just come through.
Lad wrote:
We are very sorry we donot give loans for such issues, we give soft loans to people to set up Buisness or promote their existing Buisnesses.

Please give your life to Christ Jesus Loves you.

Well, Miss Fifi le Bootstrap is demanding her money now. What's a poor boy to do?

_________________
"You body parts will picked on the scene of a fatal accident that you will be involved in seven days time"
"I hate associating with men who are camelions"
"I have knowledge in goats since i learnt that in way back in secondary institution."
"I have come to learn the world is pregnant."
"Besides i am on a GLOBAL ASSIGNMENT WITH THE UN, so be reasonable and leave insults"
"suck your blood untill you resemble stockfish"


United Kingdom x 3 x 2 Ivory Coast Australia x 2 Benin
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jose_cuervo
Moderator


Joined: 01 Mar 2006
Posts: 7859
Location: Blackacre


PostPosted: Fri Aug 14, 2009 11:19 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

A lad with qualms about loaning nonexistent money for paying a prostitution debt. Laughing

_________________
Black Ribbon ~ star Safari Tattoo

“I guess a man is the only kind of varmint sets his own trap, baits it, and then steps in it.” ~ John Steinbeck
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thomas-the-tank
Elite Baiter


Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 1087
Location: Wherever I want the lads to think I am


PostPosted: Fri Aug 14, 2009 11:41 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Yeah, weird, isn't it? Ethical lads. It deserved a reply, though:
I wrote:
Dear Bishop

I considered you to be a man of God. Why do you refuse he who seeketh the truth in the comfort of a woman's arms (Book of Isaac, ch4-xi)?

Or do you wish me to become a member of your Holy Church? I will be happy to do this if Miss Fifi will only stop bothering me about the bills for the caprine1 bondage gear she purchased for my solace? A mere $4,000 would be helpful here.


1 caprine = of, relating to, or resembling goats - a very useful word to quote when dealing with these lads

_________________
"You body parts will picked on the scene of a fatal accident that you will be involved in seven days time"
"I hate associating with men who are camelions"
"I have knowledge in goats since i learnt that in way back in secondary institution."
"I have come to learn the world is pregnant."
"Besides i am on a GLOBAL ASSIGNMENT WITH THE UN, so be reasonable and leave insults"
"suck your blood untill you resemble stockfish"


United Kingdom x 3 x 2 Ivory Coast Australia x 2 Benin
Safari Wole A x 4!! :
pony pony pony pony Goat <= don't ask about the goat! Inventor
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Jay leno
train boi


Joined: 04 Nov 2008
Posts: 697


PostPosted: Sat Aug 15, 2009 12:07 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I hope he doesn't lower you credit score for this refusal it could be bad for you!!

_________________
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nope please do not worry abt me any more i quit - Barr Jimmy Tan
HAVE YOU EVER TASTED HELL.YOU HAVE A DISEASE AND YOU REFUSE TO CURE IT.THAT IS FREE VISA TO HELL.YOU JUST LIED AND DECEIVE, I HAVE REPORTED YOU TO FBI AND JAY LENO SHOW - Fred W1lly
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Mr Tambourine Man
Baiting Guru


Joined: 06 Jun 2008
Posts: 3386
Location: Magic swirlin' ship


PostPosted: Sat Aug 15, 2009 1:45 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

It's odd, but on some level lads do seem to believe in their own scams. They don't like haggling about your percentage of imaginary fortunes for example.

_________________

Closed lad accounts x 4
3 dead websites

is always Good when you have the zeal to be a hitwoman when you out of school,it makes you bold and reall and it makes you more high than any other of your friend.
you dont have a phone.that makes makes you joe butt. Fuck you and go find something to do man. Stop disturbing me please.
This is definitely why you will remain and die in poverty, ignorant of good things and easy acknowledgment of bad things and words. Shame on you, you wicked generation children.
i went you to no that this is not a cheld pray. i went you to get back to me
we are not scammer,we hate scammer as you do.scammer make out life harder and harder,a lot of people think we are scammer,in fact,we are not!! please trustt us
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jose_cuervo
Moderator


Joined: 01 Mar 2006
Posts: 7859
Location: Blackacre


PostPosted: Sat Aug 15, 2009 2:30 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

You could turn this into a reverse church bait. Tell him that you would like to join his church, but you need to pay off your debts and get the syphilis taken care of first. Laughing

_________________
Black Ribbon ~ star Safari Tattoo

“I guess a man is the only kind of varmint sets his own trap, baits it, and then steps in it.” ~ John Steinbeck
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thomas-the-tank
Elite Baiter


Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 1087
Location: Wherever I want the lads to think I am


PostPosted: Sat Aug 15, 2009 11:39 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

It will be interesting to see what comes of this. I now have an application form (quoting from the Book of Isaac is always a smart move in these cases), but the minimum amount is GBP10,000. No interest rates quoted, either. This is good for a few more mail exchanges to get the flavor of the thing and to throw him off-script.

But 10,000 pounds? That will buy a few goats and quite a few hours of Mlle. Fifi's time!

_________________
"You body parts will picked on the scene of a fatal accident that you will be involved in seven days time"
"I hate associating with men who are camelions"
"I have knowledge in goats since i learnt that in way back in secondary institution."
"I have come to learn the world is pregnant."
"Besides i am on a GLOBAL ASSIGNMENT WITH THE UN, so be reasonable and leave insults"
"suck your blood untill you resemble stockfish"


United Kingdom x 3 x 2 Ivory Coast Australia x 2 Benin
Safari Wole A x 4!! :
pony pony pony pony Goat <= don't ask about the goat! Inventor
View user's profileSend private messageSend e-mail
Dabillder
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 07 Aug 2009
Posts: 84
Location: in a glass cage of emotion


PostPosted: Sun Aug 16, 2009 2:08 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Doesnt jesus love everyone? including prostitutes? I could be wrong

_________________
I receive your pics and you really look nice i also like your dag too -- Patrick Chan

look Bob i want you to quit from this transaction you are a complite fool. Don't ever mail me again --Rita Egobia

i have a question for you. Is there any alternative of helping me without me leaving my wife ? please i love her very much. -- Victor Kwasigha

I want to assur you that first time i will set my eyes on you..I will hug you...and give you.. a.. terible kiss

I am sorry I don't have naked picture also my name is not mugu -- Anne Mugan

if he hurt you i am going to keep his ass as soon as i arrive to the US. -- good ole Victor Kwasigha

Closed lad accounts - one lonesome piggy
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Mr Tambourine Man
Baiting Guru


Joined: 06 Jun 2008
Posts: 3386
Location: Magic swirlin' ship


PostPosted: Sun Aug 16, 2009 7:45 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Dabillder wrote:
Doesnt jesus love everyone? including prostitutes?

Apparently. I'm not sure about lads though.

_________________

Closed lad accounts x 4
3 dead websites

is always Good when you have the zeal to be a hitwoman when you out of school,it makes you bold and reall and it makes you more high than any other of your friend.
you dont have a phone.that makes makes you joe butt. Fuck you and go find something to do man. Stop disturbing me please.
This is definitely why you will remain and die in poverty, ignorant of good things and easy acknowledgment of bad things and words. Shame on you, you wicked generation children.
i went you to no that this is not a cheld pray. i went you to get back to me
we are not scammer,we hate scammer as you do.scammer make out life harder and harder,a lot of people think we are scammer,in fact,we are not!! please trustt us
View user's profileSend private message
Tigbitties
419Eater is my life


Joined: 15 Aug 2006
Posts: 402
Location: location, location


PostPosted: Sun Aug 16, 2009 8:11 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Maybe he'd be more sympathetic to your needs if you showed him just how expensive these services are by sending him some receipts using the Hooker receipt generator - NSFW.

_________________
Click here for Singing Lads and listen to the back catalogue for talented lads singing. Includes Bohemian Rhapsody, Postman Pat, The Lumberjack Song, Nellie the Elephant, Old Macdonald Had a Farm, Money - That's what I Want and many more.
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Dabillder
Wannabe Baiter


Joined: 07 Aug 2009
Posts: 84
Location: in a glass cage of emotion


PostPosted: Sun Aug 16, 2009 9:49 am Reply with quoteBack to top

For the right money lads will love anything or anyone you tell them. at least they will pretend to love anyway.

_________________
I receive your pics and you really look nice i also like your dag too -- Patrick Chan

look Bob i want you to quit from this transaction you are a complite fool. Don't ever mail me again --Rita Egobia

i have a question for you. Is there any alternative of helping me without me leaving my wife ? please i love her very much. -- Victor Kwasigha

I want to assur you that first time i will set my eyes on you..I will hug you...and give you.. a.. terible kiss

I am sorry I don't have naked picture also my name is not mugu -- Anne Mugan

if he hurt you i am going to keep his ass as soon as i arrive to the US. -- good ole Victor Kwasigha

Closed lad accounts - one lonesome piggy
View user's profileSend private message
thomas-the-tank
Elite Baiter


Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 1087
Location: Wherever I want the lads to think I am


PostPosted: Sun Aug 16, 2009 10:52 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

@Tigbitties - maybe that would do the trick. I asked about interest rates, etc., but the good Bishop is presumably tending to his flock on a Sunday, though.

_________________
"You body parts will picked on the scene of a fatal accident that you will be involved in seven days time"
"I hate associating with men who are camelions"
"I have knowledge in goats since i learnt that in way back in secondary institution."
"I have come to learn the world is pregnant."
"Besides i am on a GLOBAL ASSIGNMENT WITH THE UN, so be reasonable and leave insults"
"suck your blood untill you resemble stockfish"


United Kingdom x 3 x 2 Ivory Coast Australia x 2 Benin
Safari Wole A x 4!! :
pony pony pony pony Goat <= don't ask about the goat! Inventor
View user's profileSend private messageSend e-mail
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