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 Gold Diggers Safari #3 - Trouble in Accra!

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Nurse Nasty
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Joined: 31 Aug 2005
Posts: 7255
Location: Australia, where a dingo stole my eski


PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 4:25 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I had this tucked away in the Premium Lounge because I am using one of the eater premium member bait sites and didn't want to google it away, so I've removed all offending information. Plus as of this post my lads already started his wonderful trip of adventure and espionage.

I've made a bait site for targeting lads with the gold dust scams, and just tested it out in the last week or so. This is the first hit.

Last week I'd sent out some replies to these gold diggers and responded with something nice and benign. (I've also changed the names of all characters to avoid bait death)

NN wrote:
Hello.

Thank you for your email. We do a lot of work international researching new potential mines and purchasing precious metal. I would be interested in seeing what you really have to offer.

We currently have several teams of geologists at the moment checking out various sites and claims. In fact we have a team in your country. Please send me the spec sheets for confirmation.

Davo


Kept it generic.

Dopey lad wrote:
Dear Davo,

Thanks for your quick response and williness to handle this project with sincere heart ok.

As soon as you recieve this mail kindly send to me your full details informations to contact you so that as soon as i have them i will introdce you to the bank here where the Gold Bars and Diamonds are deposited so that they will let you know the procedures of how we will claim them for investment purposes ok.

N/B We can also withdraw the mioney worth of the treasures all depends on us the money worth is 15Million British Pounds Sterlings ok to be invested in your company ok.

Send your full informations details urgently

Sincerely Yours.

Jeffo


I sent back an email about my geologists requiring the services of local people.

Quote:
Dear Davo,

Sorry for the late reply sir my little dauther is seriously sick and was hospitalise that is why you have not heared from me all this while sir.

Please do bear in mind that i have been in this field for not less than 10 years as a Mandate seller so i cannot just lead your company to wrong people who are not genuine bear this in mind and also i cannot just forward the companies full details to you because you might jump me and contact them directly thereby removing me from the deal while you quite know that i have my commission with you and also with the company that will sale the goods to your company sir.

Please as soon as you recieve this mail do call and contact to inform me where your Geologist are located in Africa so that we can meet in person and for them to come and visit the company and see what they have for sale for your company and to confirm the legitimatecy of the company before we will proceed ok let me know where your teams of Geologist are located in Africa call me sir.

My private telephone numbers to reach me are as follows below.

+225 +225 xxxxxxxx. Mr Jeffo i will be waiting for your call and also to hear from you as soon as possible good day and stay blessed.

Sincerely Yours.

Jeffo.

Telephone: +225 xxxxxxxx


I reply and always sympathise with my lad. Plus if he has a sick or dying family member, so do I. If his car is broken, mines on fire. If his wife is unhappy, mine is currently shagging the pool boy. I digress.

Quote:
Jeffo,

Sorry to hear about your daughter. I hope she is well. I too have an ill child with cancer. She is in remission, so I understand. It's always family first.

In regards to your concerns about my company cutting you out of this deal, that's a little insulting. I am not interested in meeting your supplier, I am interested in contacts. Nor do I need to send any geologists to your location. They are far too busy to validate anything by looking, that's why we have and need metallurgical reports.

If we do need to organize a purchase or validation report we can't be everywhere at once. We currently have 2 survey teams in Cote d'Ivoire. The Angovia mine, located 300km north of Abidjan, and an Australian team is exploring the Korhogo and Tengrela gold prospects. That team is currently requiring local help. I do know that they need people all the time and the current local help has been less that adequate. I could try and contact that team on their Satellite phone and see if you could work for them digging and cataloging samples. We pay very well for work, plus if you can translate French to English, that would be a big help.

We could discuss a weekly wage, but an average wage of $1100 USD a week for a 6 day working week is good. (tax free) On Sunday the teams rest and usually go site seeing. They will be there for about 8 weeks. If your interested I can certainly help out there. Let me know if you could use this kind of experience and money.

I will call them as soon as you let me know. Where are you in Cote d'Ivoire?

Davo


Appealing to a lads laziness really does work.

Quote:
Dear Liberator,

Thanks for your quick response sir, and also thanks for your proposal and plans to me i highly appreciate this sir, i can use the experiance and money i am presently located in Abidjan and will be happy to work with your company if only i will be giving the oppurtunity to repair my car that is in the machanic workshop and put things in order concerning my family then i can be able to manege the paying offer giving to me by your company that is the $1,100 par week sir.

N/B My saller are in Accra Ghana so do let me know how we will proceed with them and let me know when we will go to there company to do the inspecting of the goods and what exactly your company need for us to forge ahead with the company is it only the metallurgical reports? please do let me know exactly what to do sir.

I <ill be waiting to hear from you as soon as possible and send to me your private telephone numbers to call you as i have giving mine to you for you to call me and you have not to hear your voice for the first time sir and to discurse in details with you i do speak French language and can always write in French aswell anyway you want me to do i will do sir.

Thanks and stay blessed.

Sincerely Yours.

Jeffo.

+225 xxxxxxxx
Call Me Urgently Sir and send to me your direct telephone numbers to call you ok.


I always ignore the requests and move forward.

Quote:
Dear Jeffo,

Thanks for your email. Our team will be traveling to the town of Odienne for supplies and to pick up some mail and new workers. You will need to make it to Odienne to meet the team who will pick you up and take you to the locations. If you are interested please let me know. These jobs are sought after and we always have many people at the usual pickup location waiting to find work. I will supply you with an employee card that you will show the geologists. That way they will know who you are and that I sent you.

Davo


I love his renegotiating in the very first line.

Quote:
Dear Davo,

Sir hope you recive my last mail to you as i have accept your offer knowing quite well that you will increase my salary as time goes on and my good dedicative and deligent to my work will give me more promotions sir.

I have attached some works we did in SIERRA LEONE FREE TOWN on 21/12/07 the MINING SKECTH PLANS to you and also some Gold METAL BARS pictures, ROUGH DIAMONDS pictures and A-U GOLD DUST available for sale by my dealers in Ghana and the Analysis of GOLD in GHANA as well for your company attentions sir.

N/B I do forget in my last mail to let you know that about the transalations of FRENCH to ENGLISH language i am perfectly good in that i can speak FRENCH and ENGLISH language fluently so if there is a role or job to do for that i am equall to the task sir there is no problem over that in the translations of FRENCH to ENGLISH there is no problem i am able to do it ok.

I will be waiting to hear from you because the wars that took place in our country and also in SIERRA LEONE really affected us a lot some my foreign buyers where all discouraged due to WARS here and there so i will be looking for any good company like yours to work with and also as you said to aid and restore me back to work so that i can give the best of my experiance to sarve them on the area of work your company need me for sir.

Remember my car broke down and coupled with my dauthers sickness and family problem at this recent world economical problems i will highly appeciate to work with your company sir if i am been giving the financial aid and incouragement i will try my best sir.

Happy weekend to you and your family do send to me the telephone numbers to call you so that we can discurse things in details and how to work together for the benefit of the both parties in the near future sir.

Sincerely Yours.
Jeffo

Telephone:+225 xxxxxxxx


Excellent news. I pretty much ignore everything else.

Quote:
Dear Jeffo,

Thanks for your email. Could you provide me with some pictures, or current ID for us to move forward. I will need to validate you as a real person before I can offer you anything else.

Davo


Amazingly, Jeffo doesn't like the idea of using his own ID, or pictures. Guess what... He has a 'friend' who would like the work.

Quote:
Dear Davo,

Sir thanks for your mail and explanations please do bear in mind that i have another big offer to go to Dublin ok so i will not like to disapoint your company as i have been in relationship but i have someone who can come in my own place i have spoken to him about the offer and he is highly intrested to get the job his name is Igor from Nigeria he can play a role of translations French to English for you people if this will be ok for you people then do organise his coming so that he will meet with your geologist in Odienne ok.

Tell him the conditions to work with your company he is a good and honest person to deal with i can introduce to your company to take my place if this is ok and good then let us forge ahead ok.

His email address below.
[email protected]

Sir you can contact him and discurse with him based on this offer and also try to help him with sincere good heart do see him as you see me please i will appreciate if he gets this offer he is an orphan and has been looking for job all this while ok.

I will wait to hear from you as soon as possible so that you people can proceed because i will be traveling very soon to oversea's Dublin with all the members of my family sir.

Thanks for your understading and co-operations.

Regards.

Jeffo


What? How incredible. He's off to Dublin, but he has a 'friend' who is willing to offer his pictures and get ready to travel.

Here is Igor. I have made bold the text of the company he thinks I work for... Oops. That's not even the name of the company. He's made a slight clerical error and is now mispronouncing it as well.

Quote:
Dear Sir,

Thanks for your mail and explanations i have been informed by Mr Jeffo about working with your company HAMAS Gold Company as a translator that means traslating FRENCH to ENGLISH language for a weekly payment of $1,100 USA Dollars anyway there is no problem if this is the only thing to work for your company i will accept and take the offer sir.

Meanwhile i am presently in Abidjan Cote d'ivoire and will be coming to Odienne by wednesday as you have adviced.

Please sir i have attached my current pictures to you for you to send them to your geogolist for them to recgonise me when i come to the hotel by wednesday morning because i will be leaving Abidjan that wednesday morning and from Abidjan to Odienne is upto six hours drive so i hope your geologist will not move before i get down there sir so let me know if i will move by Tuesday so that i will not miss them sir.

Please do let me know the neccessary things to do and prepare for, so that there will be no mistake along the line sir i am coming as a translator for your company as Mr Jeffo told me ok.

N/B I have attached my two current photos for your geogolist to know who i am ok one is the passport photo in my national Identity card and the one i took in our church receptions after service ok.

Questions.
1) Hope i will recieve my salary every weekend as Mr Jeffo informed me?

2) If i add overtime in my work i hope my salary of $1,100 USA Dollars par week will be increased?

3) What about my accomodations and feeding who will bear the responsibility hope it is your company?

4) For how long will this contract last with your company sir?

4) Who will foot for my transportations for coming to ODIENNE me or your company sir?

Sir all this questions i will like you to answer one by one so that i will know the conditions first before coming i am waiting to hear from you as soon as possible because there is no much time left as the geologist will be coming by wednesday sir.

Thanks for your concern and to offer me a job at this point of time sir.

Good day.

Sincerely Yours.

Igor


Here's Igor.

Image Image

Wednesday. His six hour drive is optimistic.

I also tried attaching the employee card he'll need to show the geologist team.

Quote:
Hello.

Sorry I have not been able to get back to you quickly. We've been out of the office and busy today. I have tried attaching that file once again. If it doesn't work let me know, and I will forward your pictures to the geologists so they know what you look like.

In regards to your questions:

1. We pay in cash at the end of each week, or alternative payment from our offices.

2. If there will be any overtime you will be paid for it. We work on a 10 hour day. Some days will be easier than others. Depends on how much work is to be completed.

3. Contract is for eight weeks at this stage. The team will remain there for 12 weeks, so depends on how much extra work there is to do. If we need you longer, I hope that won't be a problem.

4. Getting yourself to Odienne will the the responsibility of the employee. We have so many people interested in the work they come from all over hoping for employment. We really need good people though. You will likely encounter quite a few people looking for work, that's why you must keep your card a secret until the team arrives.

I hope the attached card works. I have sent this email to myself as well in the hope it does. If it doesn't I will get one of the field geologists to email it to you.

Davo


Quote:
Dear Sir,

I have received your mail and the explanations please the employee card I did not receive it you did not attaché it very well sir so do your best to send it to me today and also let me know the guarantee of getting this job because I have to travel a long way to be there ok if there is any other day that the geologist will come apart from Wednesday this week let me know to enable me prepare myself very very well you know as soon as I am there I will not be going back to Abidjan which is six hours drive to Odienne so think about all this things and do put it in considerations also send me your geologist telephone numbers to call them ok.

Please kindly reattach the employee card so that I have to have it with me to be sure of what exactly we are doing and to see how it is if there is something to fill on it ok I also hope that my accommodations and feeding is in your companies care do update me on all this things so that I will know before leaving to Odienne ok.

Do this as soon as possible because there is no time to waste reply soonest with the employee card very very important ok.

Also I hope my work is to translate FRENCH to ENGLISH language no other work to do do let me know my true position of work in your company sir.

Sincerely Yours.

Igor.


Work email didn't attach, I use my home email.

Quote:
This is my private home email. Please don't use this one. Use my work
email.
For some reason the card will not attach to my work account. I have
tried attaching it to this one.
Please reply to my work email. My wife also uses this email account.
You can try calling the Australian geologists. They are using an
Australian Satellite Phone which bounces and re-directs. The reception
comes in and out so good luck in getting them. You will want to speak to
Micko - +61 x xxxxxxxxxx
Regards,

Davo


So I expect an email from him today, which means he will leave tomorrow. I have given him 2 day window.

Quote:
Mr. Igor,

The geologists will be there in Wednesday at around 10am and will be staying overnight and leaving by 3pm Thursday afternoon, so you have plenty of time to reach and meet with them.

Good luck and hope you enjoy the work.

Davo


So he'll have to stay over night regardless. Only to get a call and be asked to make the 12km walk from Odienne to the 800 metre high Massif du Dingueie. The trucks have stopped and they are waiting for another truck. They have supplies and sleeping arrangements.

Very Happy

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Last edited by Nurse Nasty on Sun Aug 16, 2009 6:52 am; edited 25 times in total
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Juan Freizwidatt
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PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 4:53 am Reply with quoteBack to top

You are so magnificently devious. Very Happy I can't wait for Chapter Two.

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PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 5:22 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Can't wait to see what hell you put this one through. His journey has only begun.

I'm sure by the time you are done with him he will wish he was dead.

Wait till he finds out he is after fools gold.

Good luck on your safari but I'm sure you wont need luck because you are an awesome baiter.

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PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 10:42 am Reply with quoteBack to top

That shit eaten grin has got to go.

I know you will take care of that. clapping

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Nurse Nasty
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Joined: 31 Aug 2005
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Location: Australia, where a dingo stole my eski


PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 3:20 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Lad-tacular! Clicks for Igor!

Quote:
Dear Sir,

Thanks for your mail and the card and the telephone numbers of the Geologist i hope you have sent my pictures to the Geologist so that they will recognise me when i go sir please do all this neccsseary arrangements so that everything will be as planned because i am coming all the way from Abidjan that is a Ten Hours drive from Abidjan to Odienne sir it is quite a long journey so please i hope to find everything good and well in Jesus mighty name amen i will appreciate and put my best to your company wiork i hold you by faith and by trust to make sure everything works accordingly i have not travel such a long distance journey for a long time now but because of want and to work one got to help himself and i know ifg i work hard with your company your company will retain me to continue working with you people ok.

N/B Please sir in the area of feeding and accormodations you have not answer me what i ask you if we are the one that will take care of our feeding and accomodations please do let me know so that i will not exactly what i am expecting there in other not to be embarrassed by the situations ok.

I will be waiting to hear from you as soon as possible i will leave by tommorrow morning it is a long distance 10 hours journey so that i will be there by wednesday eveningthat evening i will see them in the hotel in good faith sir.

To move for my work and journey i hope you have sent my two photo pictures to them for recognission and indentifications sir? i wait for you to confirm all this things so that we will proceed sir.

Yours Sincerely.

Igor


I give him some reassurances.

Quote:
Igor,

I tried their number and left a message with Johno and Micko. I sent them the pictures and they will be there for at two days. When they get to town they should be able to call me. I need the weekly update.

Good luck Igor, they will be expecting you. You need not worry about food and accommodation. That will be taken care of for you. You will be supplied with clothing and camping gear. Everything is provided. You only need yourself. We will also supply boots. I do suggest you wear a wide brimmed hat.

Davo


Igor is still confused about the name of my company. He is calling me HAMAS, and Odienne is a large Muslim community. I hope he doesn't wander around asking for HAMAS... Hey, he said it. Not me. Very Happy

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Last edited by Nurse Nasty on Wed May 27, 2009 11:10 am; edited 1 time in total
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PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 4:26 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Oooh good one!

I have an alluvian gold dust lad and this site may come in handy...

Thumbs up

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PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 4:41 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Nurse Nasty wrote:
Good luck and hope you enjoy the work.
For some reason I love this line. Maybe it was imagining NN's sinister cackle as he typed it.

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Nurse Nasty
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PostPosted: Wed May 27, 2009 11:00 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
Hello.

Mr. Igor the team are currently on schedule. They have coming through Manankoro on the Mali border, from a survey trip.

However their phone has gone dead. Probably something to do with the batteries. They will need to make a transfer when they arrive, they have had some luck and are carrying some uncut diamonds and a little gold. They also need to transfer some of it to cash and to visit the bank and have the samples deposited in a secure location. The men will probably need for you to help translate some of this, so tell no-one the specifics of what they are carrying. They could be set upon by thieves.

We have a storage house in the west of the town, so if you wish you can leave your car there undercover and under lock and key. What is the make, model, color plus license number of your vehicle. I will need this for insurance purposes. If anything happens to your property while in storage, I will compensate you for the loss. It's a formality.

Davo


The Mali border is filled with murderous thieves and Mad Max-esque tribes of nomadic, gas-guzzling road warriors. Let's see how brave Igor is once he's been left in Odienne with no Geo-team. He may have to mount a rescue.

I have this feeling the geologists will be held for ransom and he may have to negotiate with the kidnappers in French.

Juan!!! Can you be my French leather clad kidnapper?

He's already left for the day, and will be there in 8 hours.

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PostPosted: Wed May 27, 2009 1:32 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Very nicely done. Looking forward to the updates Very Happy

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Nurse Nasty
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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 3:21 am Reply with quoteBack to top

LOST - 1 lad - Last heard around the town of Man. If anyone sees him, please let me know. I am concerned for his welfare.

I've lost him. He's been driving for a few hours and claims to be 2 hours away. I will record the next phone call, but he was stopped outside of a town called Man, and the police took all his money. Laughing

Image

It's on the route he claims to have taken, but he's a lad, and was probably trying to hit me up for some cash. He will apparently be arriving on Thursday 2pm.

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 3:52 am Reply with quoteBack to top

This just in... a phone call to a lad just outside Man...

Call to "Mr. Igor"

Very Happy

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 7:33 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Great bait Nurse! Great to hear good Aussie accents on the phone call, had trouble understanding what the hell he was going on about with the car, but sounds like he has it all sorted out anyway.

Can't wait to see what happens tomorrow .. I am expecting a kidnapping of some description Smile

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 2:46 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I've just had the dumbest conversation ever.

Igor has landed in Odienne from Abidjan. He's been traveling for 35 hours on a bus, been harassed by the police and can't find the geo-team.

The first phone call is me (John The Geologist) - We're under attack! Remember he's just arrived.

AUDIO - PHONE CALL 1 - (NN) HELP! WE'RE UNDER ATTACK - CAN YOU BRING THE CAVALRY... After you've had lunch of course...

The second phone conversation is the wonderful BluthBanana playing Davo (the owner of the mining company) - He needs Igor to help the team in trouble. He even manages to get a Star Wars reference in.

AUDIO - PHONE CALL 2 - (Bluth) WHAT IS HAPPENING! HELP THEM IGOR. YOU'RE THEIR ONLY HOPE!

Igor is panicked. He has no coin but wants to help any way he can. Davo sends off the location of the besieged geo-team.

Quote:
Hello.

IGOR!!! The team are currently under siege 12 km east at the base of the Massif du Dinguele!! These people are trying to steal our diamonds!!!!

The police may be involved. Hurry! As fast as you can go! We will reward you for everything. I don't care what is takes you need to get there and protect the shipment. They have a couple of million in uncut diamonds. You can have some as payment.

If they are kidnapped, you will need to negotiate on my behalf.

Davo


Thanks Bluth for waking up this early and being assaulted by my demands. Very Happy

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Last edited by Nurse Nasty on Thu May 28, 2009 2:49 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 2:49 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Wonderful and hilarious bait, Nurse Nasty! It is a pleasure to get to play a role, mate! Very Happy

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 2:51 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Well I can't think of a better tag team for lad "disappointment" than NN and Bluth Banana... Twisted Evil

I'm sure after Igor has his sandwich, beer, and little snooze he will be right out there to help the stranded and under attack geologist team.

As long as you pick him up he is willing to do anything for you.
Grab a gun, be a negotiator and rescuer, donate a kidney for the cause.

That's too freakin funny you two! Laughing

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 3:28 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Ohmygod, this is brilliant! Fantastic baiting! Very Happy

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 3:31 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

He's frantic. He's just run to the cyber cafe. This is live people... as it's happening. Laughing

Igor Gold Digger wrote:
Email Subject: Sir this is DEADELY mission you are sending me and you did not inform all this things before i came to this place

Dear Sir,

According to our telephone conversations I am just coming now from Abidjan and i did not know the conditions will be like this all this information’s you did not mention that to me earlier time i do not have any dime left with me so I do not know what to do now now because this is not my region and Mr Jeffo did not tell me all this things I thought is to Translate FRENCH to ENGLISH only but I did not know that this is MAFIA game you are putting me into so do something right now if you want me to mobilize men to that place you are giving me a risky job without telling me the nature of the work so that I have to prepare to come down and know what I am involve into I am coming to do for your company sir why?

If you want me to go to the place only me without other helps then send me the money to transport myself I am totally down here no dime with me all my money is finished I told you this things before coming to this long journey sir.

Igor

Call me urgently sir I am still in the cyber café


NN AS DAVO wrote:
YOU DON'T NEED AN ENTIRE MILITIA! JUST GO YOURSELF AND SEE IF THEY ARE OKAY!! I AM TRYING TO CALL JOHN!! YOU CAN'T TELL ANYONE ABOUT US, THIS IS DIAMONDS. MILLIONS OF DOLLARS IN DIAMONDS!! PEOPLE WILL STEAL THEM! JOHN CALLED AND THEY HAVE GONE! THE THIEVES ARE LEAVING BUT THEIR HUMMER AND JEEP HAS BEEN SHOT UP. YOU WILL NEED TO MEET THEM. 12KM EAST AT THE MASSIF! DON'T TELL ANYONE. IF PEOPLE FIND OUT THEY HAVE THE DIAMONDS THEY COULD BE STOLEN FROM THEM. I HAVE PROMISED YOU A STONE A REALLY GOOD ONE. YOU MUST HURRY! I WILL MAKE SURE YOU ARE REWARDED!! HURRY!!


Igor Gold Digger wrote:
Dear sir,

Please do send me the money now now because here you cannot do anything without money they ask for money first let me know what to do please sir the police will also need money they are CRAZY people here you cannot do anything herewithout money please do understand me and i do not have any dime here i am cash trapped call me urgently please let me know what to do

Please do advice on wat to do sir

i am doing my best you ask me tp come down here i come down then trouble sets in i do not have any dime to make move please what do i do sir? advice me please i want to help but i am helpless without money


NN AS DAVO, WHO IS YELLING IN CAPS wrote:
IGOR!! NO POLICE NO MILITARY.. JOHNS PHONE HAS BEEN DAMAGED IN THE FIREFIGHT. NO-ONE IS WOUNDED. THEY ARE CARRYING 14MILLION IN UNCUT DIAMONDS! CAN YOU IMAGINE IF ANYONE FOUND THAT OUT!? 14MILLION!!! YOU CAN'T TELL ANYONE!!


Igor Gold Digger wrote:
oK SIR I WILL BE GOING MYSELF ALONE TO SEE THEM FIRST OK WHAT IS THE COULOUR OF THERE JEEP LET ME KNOW I AN TAKING A CHARTED CAB TO THERE RIGHT NOW


Well, Igor has left the cafe and is now heading east. Laughing

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 3:57 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Utter genius!
I have this mental image of steve irwin with an awful smile on his face talking the lad into some more travel Razz

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 4:22 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

This is awesome Laughing

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 5:08 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

He is frantic! clapping clapping clapping

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 6:09 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

maybe play gunfire in the background during the next phone call Laughing

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 8:49 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Too fecking hillarious!!! Listening to those audios and visualising this poor sod* going into headless chook vigilante rescuer mode has got my day off to an side splitting start clapping Very Happy

Quote:
i come down then trouble sets in
A lad who accepts full responsibility and the resulting blame without prompting is rare catch indeed Laughing

*Qualification for seeming but actually cynical sympathy - I've done 16 bus hours in Brazil and can only imagine what 35 in Africa must be like...

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 11:21 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

It's been 7 hours since Igor went rushing off too the rescue. I have to admit I am impressed with his keenness to run into the fray. He has no idea what he's going to run into. I'm glad he didn't mount any militia counter-strike.

Quote:
Dear Sir,

I have gone to 12km massif du Dinguele and another extra 12 km and i did not see anybody or jeep where are they exactly please do indicate for me i am calling Mr John and he is not picking telephone sir please you people are making things difficult for me i do not have any money and still you keep on sending me message, i also do not know where to get the team sir.

I have not taking any meals since yesterday i have appointment to meet them in the hotel KAOKO now i am there without seeing anybody what do i do now sir i do not have money to pay for where to sleep sir i am dealing with you out of sincerity but you are making things difficult for me do send me some money to mobilise myself well and do let me know where exactly Mr John and the team are and tell Mr John to call me urgently to indicate where i will find them sir i am in big trouble here i came all the way from Abidjan very very long journey two days journey and yet i have not seen the reality of what i am here for please do send me some money to have with me for my hotel and feeding i am stranded here without seeing the team sir.

Think about my situations and conditions i did not take any dime from you i borrow money to come to this journey to work for your company but you are discouraging me you only send me message without anything it is too bad sir.

Do call me urgently because i am confused and troubled without hearing from the team sir.

N/B I AM NOT INVOLVING ANY POLICE OR MILITARY AS YOU HAVE ADVICED ME OK, THEN DO LET ME KNOW MY OWN POSITION PLEASE I AM STRANDED HERE HELP ME OUT PLEASE SIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR HAVE I DONE WRONG TO COME ALL THE WAY FROM ABIDJAN TO WORK FOR YOUR COMPANY SIR I HAVE DONE MY OWN SIDE DO YOURS TELL JOHN TO CALL ME I KEPT EVERYTHING SECRET I TOLD THE PEOPLE THAT I MET IN KOAKO THAT JOHN IS MY CUSTOMER THAT CAME TO BUY IROKO WOODS FROM OUR COMPANY AND THEY HAVE BEEN ATTACK BY ARMED BANDITS THAT IS ALL I STILL KEEP EVERYTHING CONFIDENTIAL AND SECRET OK.

SEND ME MONEY URGENTLY SO THAT I CAN PAY FOR MY HOTEL BILLS AND FEEDINGS THE BIKE BOY THAT TOOK ME TO THE PLACE YOU SENT ME I HAVE NOT PAID HIM ASWELL DO NOT MAKE THINGS DIFFICULT FOR ME SIR I AM STRANDED WITHOUT SEEING JOHN OR THE TEAM WHAT DO I DO NOW SIR?

I will be waiting to hear from you as soon as possible please do call me ok i will be waiting for your urgent call sir.

Innocent Igor.


Quote:
Dear Sir,

I came with Public transport ok I did not come with any car please bear this in mind I am in the HOTEL KOAKO as you told me to do I do not have any cash money left with me sir I have confidence and trust in you by making this moves without receive any DIME from you so when I explained to you that I need financial assistant do not wave it out it is paining me you told me they are in MASSIF DU DINGUELE I went there with charted bike BIKE without seeing anybody I do not have money to even pay for my hotel tonight what do I do sir think about my position and problems I am highly STARNDED SIR DO BEAR THIS IN MIND OK.

SIR HOW CAN I TELL PEOPLE WHAT THEY HAVE SUCH THING AM I A KID I KNOW WHAT IS INVOLVE IT IS RISKY TO EXPOSE THERE MISSION I TOLD THE HOTEL PEOPLE THAT THIS ARE OUR WOOD COMPANY CUSTOMARS AND BUYERS OK YOU DO NOT MENTION WHAT THEY ARE CARRYING PLEASE I KNOW THAT.

INNOCENT IGOR

I AM WAITING FOR YOUR CALL THIS IS NOT THE ARRANGEMENT WE MAKE BEFORE I LEFT ABIDJAN EVERYTHING IS BECOMING BORED AND TROUBLESOME FOR ME SIR THINK ABOUT MY CONDITIONS SIR.

INNOCENT IGOR

CALL ME SIR

N/B VERY VERY IMPORTANT SEND TO ME YOUR OWN TELEPHONE NUMBERS TO CALL YOU PLEASE I AM STRANDED HERE SIR.


Quote:
Igor,

Where have you been?? I have been trying to call you for the last few hours. What do you mean they were not there?? This is strange I am sending a rescue team. Stay were you are and keep your phone on. Charge it up. I will keep trying to call and email soon. There is no way we could have seen this coming Igor. How could anyone have counted on this happening. John has not called me. Has he called you?

Davo


Maybe he should toddle off home, or meet the team back in Man.

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PostPosted: Thu May 28, 2009 11:31 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

That's some very nice lad cruelty there mate, keep it up Twisted Evil Thumbs up

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PostPosted: Fri May 29, 2009 12:02 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I have not taking any meals since yesterday
i do not have money to pay for where to sleep
i borrow money to come to this journey
I do not have money to even pay for my hotel tonight

We know lads lie, but even so this is after just one week! Heaven help the poor wee lad if NN hangs onto him for several more... Shocked Laughing

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