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 V14gra spam funnies

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PsycheDelia_Smith
Baiting Guru


Joined: 30 Oct 2004
Posts: 3573
Location: Devon, UK


PostPosted: Sat May 09, 2009 10:17 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I have one catcher that gets hit by these daily. Some of 'em would've fitted right into a Carry-On script.

Today's examples:

'Your big tool will be like a soldier: big, strong and always ready.'
'We hae the best alarm-clocks for your small fellow down there.'
'Aid your bed event'

and..

'Are you sick because the size of your stick?'

Laughing

Who the hell thinks them up? I thought Frankie Howard was dead.

_________________
SATISFIED CLIENTS:
"I was forced to sell off my designers black suit to be able to return back to Ouagadougou and on my coming back here my wife
took me to the cyber cafe and showed me the site where my photographs of circumcision was put on the net."-'Tosser' 0gugu0

"I am now completely twatted and shagged and will obey all your instructions to the fullest."-"Tosser" Oguguo

Golden Pith "Frankily speaking,I wouldn't want to travel to the far east again."-Edward Smith, Lagos-Singapore (14600 miles round trip via Dubai)


9x Safari 4 x Lagos-Accra , 3x Port Harcourt - Ibadan, 1x Lagos-Singapore, 1x Burkina-Bamako
Netherlands Nigeria Ghana South Africa
Sand Timer'Ed', 3 yrs 8 mnths Sand Timer'Oguguo',6 years and 4 months
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limburger
Master of Master Baiters


Joined: 21 Nov 2008
Posts: 518


PostPosted: Sat May 09, 2009 11:25 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Over a year ago on my work email, I would get tons of spam for a related product that you might say compliments v1agra. I had to do a search to find an example of this spam. Luckily they were funny and odd enough that they have been immortalized on some people's blogs. Most of these spams were memorable for using a great word: whizgiggle. These spams constantly changed the words to get around spam filters, but the sentence structure was the same. An example I found:


Females always whizgiggled at me and even boys did in the open lavatory! Well, now I whizgiggle at them, because I took M_E GA D IK for 3 months and now my phallus is dreadfully greater than world.

A web search on whizgiggle will bring up more of these..

_________________
--------------
Closed lad accounts x14 Easter 2015
so your job is to hack some body job you go die and you must run mad in this country all generation will go to hell fire i must get you and i will troll way you inside beach idiot as you hack my money and you crate email dey write richard as you do it i will spoil the job . idot --Steve F
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lotta
Baiting Guru


Joined: 08 Jun 2005
Posts: 13613
Location: 2 Speckled Cct Springfield Lakes QLD 4300


PostPosted: Sat May 09, 2009 4:39 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
'We have the best alarm-clocks for your small fellow down there.'



Laughing

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Slightlyoutofit
Baiting Guru


Joined: 13 Feb 2007
Posts: 14310
Location: Foraging for Nuts.


PostPosted: Sat May 09, 2009 5:18 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

These were in my catcher account today:

Quote:
Make it a stick of pleasure


Quote:
Dreaming about her friends beating your time?


Quote:
Want to be like a tiger in bed? Time to be thinner


Isn't the last one exactly not what Viagra is about?

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MAY THE HAND THAT TYPE ON KEYBORD BECOME STRICKEN AND TRANSMIT VIRUS TO YOU ENTIRE BODY. - Dr Linda Akeem
oh what a mess its time cabbage punks like u will be expose for trully what they are. - David Cole
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Connie L. Gus
Moderator


Joined: 07 Oct 2005
Posts: 6405
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow


PostPosted: Sat May 09, 2009 7:47 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Getting thinner does help.
Winfrey's favourite TV doc, Dr. Mehmet Oz, recently linked weight loss to apparent growth of the male member. "If you lose 35 pounds, if you're a male, you are gaining one inch of penis length," he trumpeted.
source

_________________
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Closed lad accounts-a few, United Nations
LISTEN I CAN NOT TAKE YOUR SHIT ANY LONGER WE HAVE WHROTE A PETITION AGAINST YOU TO THE FBI WITH ALL OUR EVIDENCE YOU ARE INTO PROSTITUTION,DRUG DEALING, FORGERY, CREDIT CARDS FORGRY WESTEN UNION FALSIFICATION,DRUGING MEN,COMMETING MURDER, STEALING, DRUNCARD, ALL THIS WE HAVE THE EVIDENCE TO PROOF OUR CASE AGAINST YOU.-Johnson Hill
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Slightlyoutofit
Baiting Guru


Joined: 13 Feb 2007
Posts: 14310
Location: Foraging for Nuts.


PostPosted: Sat May 09, 2009 10:36 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^^ That would be great if the dude in my email was selling diet pills but he was selling Mycoxafloppin pills. AFAIK, that shit doesn't help you lose more than a couple of fluid ounces.

Telling people to go on a diet would be doing himself out of a spam job.
And if that was the case, he'd just be stiffing himself.

edit: Ah. The website in the link I got sells Viagra and diet pills - everything an impotent lardarse needs.
That reminds me: I must email Jojobean.

_________________
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God will see you true for all this you have done to me you bastard. - Collins Kalu
MAY THE HAND THAT TYPE ON KEYBORD BECOME STRICKEN AND TRANSMIT VIRUS TO YOU ENTIRE BODY. - Dr Linda Akeem
oh what a mess its time cabbage punks like u will be expose for trully what they are. - David Cole
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Nanny Ogg
"Bruce"


Joined: 19 Mar 2007
Posts: 2624


PostPosted: Sun May 10, 2009 7:26 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I'e had everything from trains going into tunnels ( did get me interested for a nano second ) to give it to your couple ( ? )
diet drugs
acai berries
but now they're venturing into antiviral drugs
now THAT'S adapting to the market forces
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jojobean
Baiting Guru


Joined: 01 Dec 2005
Posts: 7586
Location: YOU WILL DRINK YOUR URINE IN A COMERCIAL BUS


PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2009 11:59 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Connie L. Gus wrote:
Getting thinner does help.
Winfrey's favourite TV doc, Dr. Mehmet Oz, recently linked weight loss to apparent growth of the male member. "If you lose 35 pounds, if you're a male, you are gaining one inch of penis length," he trumpeted.
source


Wow. That's impressive. That means I have some mammoth potential in there. Let's see... a current 10", plus 1" for every 35lbs I lose? I'm sporting a 20" in there. Thanks for the advice.

_________________
Golden Pith Globe T.W.A.T Jack Boot
Christ Safari Ghana-Chad
Miracle Safari Benin-Chad
Omar Safari Edo-Abeche T.W.A.T
Adamu Safari Lagos-Abeche
Emi Safari- S Africa-Egypt-Sudan 10k miles
Chris Safari Jolly Roger Dakar-Niger-BF-Cameroon-Lagos-Mali-Nairobi 9.6k miles

Kevin Pith Helmet 10 Safari Accra- BF x2, Togo x2, Kumasi x3, Bolgatanga, Benin City, Tamale x2 Suitcase 5k miles Tattoo x 6
Kenny Safari Safari Safari 3k miles- dont f*ck me up about the payment plz. i have a policy about that. I JUST GOT A SMALL GOAT TODAY AND ITS IN MY HOUSE NOW. i lobve the goat.
Goat
Ben Safari Safari Safari 2.5k miles

Misc Pith Helmet 20 Pith Helmet 5 Pith Helmet 5 Safari Safari Germany-Holland, Atlanta, Beijing-ChangZhou, London-Glasgow, TIMBUKTU x 2
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windypops
Baiting Guru


Joined: 25 Jan 2005
Posts: 5884
Location: Planet X


PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2009 12:28 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
YOUR PEN15 HAS WON $10,000,000!!!!


I can dream can't I. Wink

_________________
Mortar x22 Inventor Easter Egg 2011

"No amount of semen donation will save this situation" Sanny Sanny
"We must disagree to agree" Raji Musa

If it's LADS you want. GoTo: http://www.yopmail.com/
and sign in with either ladmail or kentbrockman
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GSN_fan
Hellish Taskmaster


Joined: 31 Dec 2008
Posts: 537


PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2009 4:26 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
If your manhood is a motor, our products make it work like F-1 bolide's one


Laughing

_________________
Cellphone x12
Closed lad accounts x23
United Kingdom x6 United States x4 Nigeria Australia Switzerland Russia x2 x2 Germany

Listen very openly Barrister Koffi Adams forward to this or what you sent to him how der you sent such a thing to him with is age am very disapointed in you if by your next mail you could not comeplete sending the right way sorry.

Even my little child know how to send money and give to the taker on how to take it so

Austria is a the name of a country near Australia.

This are the details we required from you so our customer cab infect payment to you.

Our is not ready to receive your incandesces message

send to me their pin code and asses code
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MeridianAlicante
Master Baiter


Joined: 23 Sep 2008
Posts: 236


PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2009 11:55 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I used to work at an engineering company, and was in charge of the emails.

The day that I got one of these messages with the phrase "Meat Machinery" in it, I nearly died of the giggles.

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Closed lad accounts x 7 Mortar x2

Fake Cheques: $150,000

"May God bless you? Happy exams in advance Thanks," Mr. Herbert Horsey

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N N N
Master of Master Baiters


Joined: 26 Sep 2008
Posts: 689


PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2009 12:55 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

just got this email header

Quote:
You will become a hero in her eyes after giving her the best in-out in her life.


and I thought of you ....
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Corona
Eater's sweetheart


Joined: 21 Sep 2006
Posts: 8633
Location: On ya left!


PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2009 1:23 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Are you guys talking about your penis's again??? Surprised

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bohigal
Baiting Guru


Joined: 01 Aug 2007
Posts: 7227
Location: Epstein's Delicatessen


PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2009 1:49 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

JojoBigBean wrote:
I'm sporting a 20" in there

You would come out of retirement for a thread such as this, wouldn't you. Btw, what's your phone no.?

_________________

Stop typing in french, am seriously dissapointed....am just confused!!!
You will have my nuts in your hands as soon as i have the latrine in my hand & i will pay the goats to the lawyer
My dear with this only, it is clear you have contacted and communicated with Africa Fraudsters and even send funds to him. what a pity!
YOU ARE A WITCH. MAY YOU MENSURATE NON STOP TILL THE END OF YOUR LIFE
Golden PithSafari Mortar Tattoo Vcamera Closed lad accountsSand Timer Team Hector:Lagos-Douala,Benin-Liberia,Senegal-Gambia-Mali-Chad, Egypt ,Awka w/ Shorty
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Roycropper
Undead Moderator


Joined: 14 Nov 2005
Posts: 7993
Location: Luxury Coffin


PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2009 1:58 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I get squillions of these in one of my baiting accounts, shows I've seriously upset someone. From today's batch:

Quote:
Few blue-pills on vacation will ensure your macho power. Don't try luck!
Your pants' key from her bedroom!


Quote:
hoist your belove sexual event with relef of fine meds.


Quote:
Your bedroom doesnt smell like passion anymore? Change it.
Or open the window.

_________________
the European Union has bounced on our freckles
COULD YOU IMAGINE WHAT HAPPENED WHEN I WENT TO THE BANK
our Agent is Completely broke, pocketless and stranded
I WLL SEND AN AFRICA WITCH TO ATTACH YOU BASTARD
You go die like bird
i started shouting HALLELUJAGOBBLE but none of them notice me immediately police arrested me due to the shouting
f*ck u asshole ur damn mother will loose ur fcuking skull brain ur brain is nothing to compare with rat f*ck ur u
MY FRIEND ALEX WAS DETAINED IN POLICE STATION
I am not happy due to the question i answered at money office. Let me tell you do not play with me ok.
Pith Helmet 10
x4 United Kingdom New Zealand Mortar Closed lad accounts Sand Timer 6Yrs Tattoo x6 Flying Monkey
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windypops
Baiting Guru


Joined: 25 Jan 2005
Posts: 5884
Location: Planet X


PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2009 6:10 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
Is sex The Proof Of Yur Love For Your Partner?


Duh! Laughing

_________________
Mortar x22 Inventor Easter Egg 2011

"No amount of semen donation will save this situation" Sanny Sanny
"We must disagree to agree" Raji Musa

If it's LADS you want. GoTo: http://www.yopmail.com/
and sign in with either ladmail or kentbrockman
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N.O.R.A
Baiting Guru


Joined: 17 Feb 2008
Posts: 2341
Location: Enjoying all the love from Africa.


PostPosted: Mon May 18, 2009 9:35 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
* Super-ChargedSexDrive
* Rock-so1id Hardness
* Feel bigger, wider, and fuller (to you and to HER)
* Throbbing powerful blood flow to thePenis
* .1ntense, long-lasting iErections
* Outstanding control and stamina
* Strong and fast recovery for multiple repeat sessions!
* Big, impressiveEjaculations
* Increased confidence andSexualChemistry
* More rapidArousal
* Greater, morePleasurable sensations
* Harder and more frequent iErections
* Massive, earth-shattering0rgasms
* All-night staying power


Quote:
.. And that's just the beginning. Shocked

_________________
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"I'm a girl." [Slightlyoutofit]
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lotta
Baiting Guru


Joined: 08 Jun 2005
Posts: 13613
Location: 2 Speckled Cct Springfield Lakes QLD 4300


PostPosted: Tue May 19, 2009 4:03 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
Make your pecker firmer

_________________
<a href="/forum/donate.php">[Click here to donate to 419Eater.com]</a> Lead Support Contact for Missing Posts - (pm me)

Nigeria bank kills South Africa Netherlands Netherlands United Kingdom United Kingdom United Kingdom United Kingdom Spain Spain Spain United Arab Emirates
star star
Mortar Nurse Nastys Audi TT Mc Fry

Alan James Watson (AKA Bi Gal, AKA Big Al, AKA De Master Yoda) -2007, 2008, 2009, 2010 "Doos of the year" award winner

Frederick Fokker:
"I am giving you about a month to get your act together, i am cutting you and the eater a bit of slack"
Dec 11, 2007

Elton Purple Flower Black Ribbon Flying Monkey
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Craig007
rude right wing fascist


Joined: 19 Apr 2007
Posts: 3124


PostPosted: Tue May 19, 2009 4:05 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
Be sure in your hose

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CAN VISA BE GIVING IN THE PLANE? YOUR QUEEN ELIZABETH CAN NOT TAKE VISA IN THE PLANE,TALKLESS OF YOU - WILLIAM PAUL

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Safari Safari Wulugu or Bust Safari- Lagos, Nigeria to Paga, Ghana and Tokwari, Ghana X2-3800mi. "I'm leaving this bullshit area"

Safari - Accra to Cotonou - 430 miles

100% RISK FREE TRANSACTION

CHERRIE MENTOR PROGRAM
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Diana Prince
Master Baiter


Joined: 11 Nov 2008
Posts: 101
Location: in my invisible airplane


PostPosted: Mon May 25, 2009 1:01 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
Your virile stamina will return to you like a boomerang.


Newly arrived message this morning on a rarely-used account (which, by the way, is accessed via an e-mail system called "SquirrelMail." ) Wink

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Mr Gomer-ette

Closed lad accountsEaster Egg
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Dorothy
Baiting Guru


Joined: 09 Jul 2008
Posts: 3114
Location: somewhere over the rainbow


PostPosted: Mon May 25, 2009 2:53 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

My nonprofit sees a daily stream of these too. (The smiley is actually from the original email)

Today's gem:

Quote:
With our pharm you'll have sword-like dick ! Conquer women with him ! Wink

_________________
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