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 Richard He4d Ladshare ***FIRST EVER ROLLERCOASTER TROPHY!***

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Ninastian
419Eater is my life


Joined: 19 Sep 2006
Posts: 416


PostPosted: Sat Dec 06, 2008 3:03 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

For various RL reasons, I have decided to spend less time with my lad - the one who brought us the IoW safari, Ham4s H00ter, cropped file transfer modality, 130+ health insurance forms, etc etc etc.

Various baiters including Slaphappy and Yastreb have now been let loose on him. They and anyone else involved can post relevant stuff in this thread, we can see how the scripts develop and do any necessary coordination (and have a bloody good laugh).

Slaphappy and Yastreb have deployed young Emi1 and tough Capt Ma1 to wind up the lad, who is scamming as Richard Head, a financial advisor who has access to various investment schemes.

My role is Sir Ch4rles F3lch, a sort of Bell0 mega-oga character whom RH is desparate to work for. Unfortunately as well as giving RH lots of tuition and "client leads" (such as Emi1 and Capt Ma1), Sir C also constantly slaps and abuses him, threatens his life, and eventually chops all his dollaz. BTW Sir C also refers to RH as Cl0ve, because he knows this makes him angry.

The story so far: Emi1 is interested in funding a roller coaster (see our old thread http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=1275068#1275068 for how that modality has started out), and Capt Ma1 is considering some exciting real estate development opportunities in Tennessee and also some 100% risky free electricity projects in (of all places) Ethiopia.

In my role as Sir Ch4rles, I keep the ball rolling by egging on and/or slapping my lad, according to how well he is managing our shared clients. My lad expects to receive 50% of any dollaz we get from these mugus, but of course that will never happen... But first, the modalities need to be developed in more detail.

_________________
Safari Sea-Mugu, London-Is1e of Wight
Safari Safari dickboi, Lagos-Abidjan and Lagos-Accra
Closed lad accounts Several
Oh [the captive] ate his own willy!!! HAHAHAHA. I saw the look of excitement in his eyes like no other meat taste better!! yummm yummm! HAHAHAAHAHA. He cut his big right toe, his penis and penis shaft at different stages- funny funny funny!! He did this where some promiscous women do all sort of things. I know they were all thrilled. ahahahahahhhhhaaaaaa. His penis shaft was sewn to his nostril and more!! The doctor did a good job!! My men took picture of him parading him around the market square and public schools where everyone sang him wanker praises!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! I will continue to torture him unless I receive my $150,000 reward for wasting my time!! Period!

Last edited by Ninastian on Fri Dec 19, 2008 9:24 am; edited 1 time in total
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Ninastian
419Eater is my life


Joined: 19 Sep 2006
Posts: 416


PostPosted: Sat Dec 06, 2008 3:14 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Writing to him as his oga Sir Ch4rles, I have suggested to my lad how he might entice the young, rich but easily distracted Emi1 into a rollercoaster financing scam:

Quote:
Yet again, I am having to do all the work for you! All because of your laziness and stupidity!!

Listen - to begin with, you must ask Emi1 for an initial design spec for his roller coaster - the theme, how big, how scary, etc etc. Once he sends you this, do some drawings, scan them and send them to him. Google "rollercoaster" to get some ideas, but do not copy anything directly or one of Emi1's nerdy friends might recognise it and they will never believe you again. Also, build a simple model out of cardboard, wire etc and send him photos of it. It doesn't need to be accurate - just to illustrate the concept. Remember that this kid has a very short attention span, so make it bold and exciting. But if you don't make it convincing, he will lose interest.

Listen Cl0ve - if you can't get BIG money from this [mugu], you might as well go back to your old job, whatever that was (stealing from market stalls in Lagos, maybe? or cleaning toilets for rich overseas businessmen in Port Harcourt hotels?).

_________________
Safari Sea-Mugu, London-Is1e of Wight
Safari Safari dickboi, Lagos-Abidjan and Lagos-Accra
Closed lad accounts Several
Oh [the captive] ate his own willy!!! HAHAHAHA. I saw the look of excitement in his eyes like no other meat taste better!! yummm yummm! HAHAHAAHAHA. He cut his big right toe, his penis and penis shaft at different stages- funny funny funny!! He did this where some promiscous women do all sort of things. I know they were all thrilled. ahahahahahhhhhaaaaaa. His penis shaft was sewn to his nostril and more!! The doctor did a good job!! My men took picture of him parading him around the market square and public schools where everyone sang him wanker praises!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! I will continue to torture him unless I receive my $150,000 reward for wasting my time!! Period!
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Yastreb
Demented Opportunist


Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 14920
Location: Leading my wolf pack


PostPosted: Sun Dec 07, 2008 11:13 am Reply with quoteBack to top

This Lad can write up a storm, believe me!

In between discussions of religion (which I'll skip here) and politics (ditto), time has been taken off from business to discuss matters military.

First Mal:

Quote:
I've killed eighteen men that I could see at the point I pulled the trigger, and another two I found afterwards around the ruins of their Dashaka where I'd fired minutes before, in Somalia and Iraqi Freedom - and I don't know how many in Desert Saber when I was flying a gunship. I'm not proud of that. I did my duty as I saw it.


The Lad's reply went on... and on...

Quote:
A lot of retired personnels in an after-war-event during service years I have heard or read about have suffer one deformity or the other- not really as similar with the case of Ph1l 4rmstrong [the gunner in Mal's Cobra in 1991] which seem very rare. In reality Captain, I haven't yet come across or heard any ex military personnel blinded by a war weapon [I think Mal's going to get pissed off at this]. How sad. Of recent times, it has been recorded that a lot of soldiers who served in the early 90s war have permanent medical disability. Some are as a result of burns, only a few suffer unique medical condition which causes are unknown till this time. Obviously you have suffered some indelible scars as an after-war effect, I think these are normal.


Quote:
I quite understood what it was like in a war-battle-field, you would not intentionally kill anyone. But in a War zone,you MUST kill someone that might cause a breach in your security. As this adage applies to a solider in a war zone " attack is the best form of defense" You have to attack your enemy in other to maintain,sustain and secure your position. I never was in service, but I suppose I am right with my input in a typical war encounter.


Mal is not going to be happy with this either... when he gets out of hospital for MRI scans checking for shrapnel in his leg...

_________________
I will heed the advice of a polite horse for it is written that more flies are caught with honey than vinegar... although assault carbines and monstrous wolves are still fun.

"I aim to misbehave."

Asena - Pretty Rose
United Kingdom x5 Spain New Zealand Senegal Ghana x2 Benin Closed lad accounts x 180
Safari x 4 - Oyenka Chidinma - Lagos to Cotonou; Dickyboi - Lagos to Accra; Femmy - Lagos to Porto Novo; "Woody" - Accra to Singapore
Sand Timer x 7: Dufus & Abavana/Capt Joseph Annan/Victor Walla/Ohene Agyekum/James Jeffrey/Peace Akpobor & John Mensah/Tony Kalaby & Addo Gilbert
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Ninastian
419Eater is my life


Joined: 19 Sep 2006
Posts: 416


PostPosted: Sun Dec 07, 2008 1:32 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I see that BluthBanana has piled in with this hilarious proposition:

Quote:
I have been giving your offers a considerable amount of thought, and while they're very fine offers I feel as though this is perhaps the opportunity I've been waiting for to push forward an idea I've been thinking about for a few years now. I know, I'm not a professional like the two of you, but I figured that since I have the financial resources and you have the investment know-how we can make my idea a real success.

It has been my dream to discover proof of the lost continent of Atlantis. You see, I've done a considerable amount of research and am confident that I know of its true location. However, I do not have the necessary connections or skill set to properly arrange the search and re-flotation processes (I would like to re-establish Atlantis as the 8th continent). From reading your well-researched report you sent me I know that you are the men I have been looking for to organize this job.

Please let me describe my financial situation so that you will assured that I have the funds to properly pull off such a venture. I used to live in New York and worked on Wall Street as a major trader of stocks and bonds. That is where I met my wife 20 years ago. Both of us are very good at what we do and have accumulated considerable wealth. Two years ago my wife and I met another woman on Wall Street who was also very skilled at working the market and soon we fell in love. Unfortunately people on the east coast are not open to polygamy, so in order to live the way we please we had to move out west. Wisely, we moved our money into safer investments before our move so we were well-cushioned from the recent economic troubles. Currently our combined wealthy exceeds $1 billion USD.

We are willing to invest $200 million in an effort to re-establish Atlantis, and if successful we are willing to invest more to repopulate it, with an emphasis on polygamist relationships. I know this message comes as a surprise to you, but my wives and I think that meeting the two of you is more than just a coincidence and the opportunity we've been waiting for.

I hope to hear back from you soon with your willingness to take on this project. If we are successful I guarantee you that we will share in enormous wealth as such a discovery will generate nearly $1 billion in artifacts, tours, etc.


My lad bounces this one off his oga Sir Ch4rles (=me):

Quote:
Sir, where do we go from here? You have to find out if this guy is for real. We are going to make a lot of money if this guy is for real.


Well, a good boss always encourages his direct reports: Evil or Very Mad

Quote:
This is the perfect mugu - rich, and full of big ideas! Can't you see that?

Go back and sell him your services. Make him believe that only you can unlock the door to his dreams!


Get your snorkel out, boi... Very Happy

_________________
Safari Sea-Mugu, London-Is1e of Wight
Safari Safari dickboi, Lagos-Abidjan and Lagos-Accra
Closed lad accounts Several
Oh [the captive] ate his own willy!!! HAHAHAHA. I saw the look of excitement in his eyes like no other meat taste better!! yummm yummm! HAHAHAAHAHA. He cut his big right toe, his penis and penis shaft at different stages- funny funny funny!! He did this where some promiscous women do all sort of things. I know they were all thrilled. ahahahahahhhhhaaaaaa. His penis shaft was sewn to his nostril and more!! The doctor did a good job!! My men took picture of him parading him around the market square and public schools where everyone sang him wanker praises!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! I will continue to torture him unless I receive my $150,000 reward for wasting my time!! Period!
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Yastreb
Demented Opportunist


Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 14920
Location: Leading my wolf pack


PostPosted: Sun Dec 07, 2008 1:41 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Mal just laid into the Lad... using a scene I've quoted to Lads as a parting shot ( Wink )

Quote:
I don't think you understand what it means to fight.... "War is cruelty and you cannot refine it".

And "you would not intentionally kill anyone" - horse puckey. It's what I was given an M-16 for; it's why the 20 Mike-mike and FFARs and Hellfires are fitted to a Cobra. Soldiers kill. It's what we do - and did.

In Somalia, I confronted a militiaman who'd been pillaging relief supplies. He realised I had the drop on him, so he put down his G3 rifle and grinned at me. He knew the rules of engagement and was waiting to be taken off so the UN would release him later. But I was carrying an... M4 carbine with an underslung shotgun that we normally used to blast open locks. I had mine loaded with double-ought buckshot. When I saw that grin, and the hacked-open crates of medicines intended for sick children, I fired the shotgun into his face from just two metres. His head was literally torn apart - blood and bone and brains and hair in a red smear across the wall behind him. Some of it splattered on my arms and helmet. I turned away and moved on to direct my company in dealing with the other intruders. To this day I haven't regretted for an instant that I snuffed the life from the piece of human garbage.

_________________
I will heed the advice of a polite horse for it is written that more flies are caught with honey than vinegar... although assault carbines and monstrous wolves are still fun.

"I aim to misbehave."

Asena - Pretty Rose
United Kingdom x5 Spain New Zealand Senegal Ghana x2 Benin Closed lad accounts x 180
Safari x 4 - Oyenka Chidinma - Lagos to Cotonou; Dickyboi - Lagos to Accra; Femmy - Lagos to Porto Novo; "Woody" - Accra to Singapore
Sand Timer x 7: Dufus & Abavana/Capt Joseph Annan/Victor Walla/Ohene Agyekum/James Jeffrey/Peace Akpobor & John Mensah/Tony Kalaby & Addo Gilbert
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SlapHappy
Baiting Guru


Joined: 15 May 2006
Posts: 9612
Location: Floating up and down with happiness.


PostPosted: Sun Dec 07, 2008 3:07 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

This lad does like to write. Smile He seems a bit condencending to Emil.
Quote:
Dear Emil,

I am glad that your head is much better now. Your parents won't beat you if you do well at mathematics ok. Oh I didn't know you referred to your Syrian mouse as Hamster. You don't expect me to know everything do you? Oh Houdini is really fat now. Obviously he needs exercise otherwise he will always appear like a giant and it will put your cat on the run all the time. lol

I have discontinued every plans to help you invest through the Tennessee park and the African projects too. There are a lot of terrible things happening there in Africa, many people are suffering and their government is corrupt- you are right. I will not help you invest there, but I would surely support your idea to build the tallest, fattest and best roller coaster in the world ok. The such that your girlfriend Norah and her friends would love and be happy to see you own ok. The pics you sent me are nice, Norah, Houdini and the ice in stream.Why would I want to sleep your girlfriend? I never will ok. I don't do such things I am a very good Christian man.

As for your roller coaster, I will have the United Nations approve it so it looks very legal and you will have license for it. As soon as we get the Roller Coaster established in America, we will try to support the american government to get all the bad people thrown into the deserts of antarctica ok, and feed all the good people from the profits you make from your Roller Coaster.

I really want to help you build the very best roller coaster of your choice in the world. So far this is what I done for to help you: I have been in contact with the best Roller Coaster designers, architectures and engineers in the world, they need to know exactly what specification you recommend: like how big, how scary, the theme, at what top speed, thrill scale? Will it be wood roller coaster or steel roaster coaster? Do you want it on the sea (like Aqua Trax built in South Korea) or on land like Kingda Ka Coast? Also you said you want it twice as big as Kingda Ka. The Kingda ka is around 456 ft tall, it means yours should be around 912 ft tall? Huh? Please provide me all the necessary details, so I could have the archichects sketch a design of how it should look.

I have a little secret to share with you: I told that a Spanish boy within your age limit has the same goal as you. He is going to be 16 by December 27. He is planning to build the tallest, fatest and most attractive Roller Coaster in the world- in the Carribbean. I promise yours will be greater than his, even though it will cost more, but I will make sure you have it best. It should be recorded in the Guinness Book of Record (Emil ,17, made the greatest, fattest, tallest and most attractive Roller Coaster in the world, hehehehe ok). And finally it will be secured in such a way that it will not be prone to any aviation problems ok.

Get back to me with all the information. I hope you have a great weekend!

Remain blessed,
R1chard H3ad
Laughing "fattest" roller coaster?? Did I say fattest? Laughing

edit: some l33ting

_________________
Sand Timer x Reven U., Fats Walla, Donny
Safari x10 Sand Timer X2 MM:Mikex2, JohnK, D@rlington, Ob1, Armstrong, Ismail, TG&Friend
Safari x3 Nancy, Security Guy, Robert Accra-Tamale
Safari Safari Sand Timer (19 mo.) Tina and Joe's Safari - Accra to Niger & Timbucktu
Safari Safari Z@ke & Charlie -Wulugu Or Bust Safari- Lagos to Paga & Tokwari X2 - 3800mi.
Golden Pith x3 H3ctor & C@leb - Yankar1 & Parakou
Safari x2 Charles and Friend-Amsterdam to Vatican
Safari Issac to Chad
Be A Cool Cat, Like Me Trophy Videos Cool Stuff
pony pony Closed lad accounts Mortar Goat Easter Egg 2011

Last edited by SlapHappy on Tue Dec 30, 2008 12:33 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Yastreb
Demented Opportunist


Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 14920
Location: Leading my wolf pack


PostPosted: Tue Dec 09, 2008 1:07 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Mal sent a soothing message:

Quote:
I'm feeling a little better now - I hope my forthright statements and anecdote didn't cause you any concern.
A brief note on the Ethiopia project - I notice that the MOU is very short term and you could be cut out at any time. This is no good to me - continuity is important and if you're not renewed, then I wouldn't want to continue with the project. I suggest you get it renegotiated ASAP. This, after all, is a long-term project - I think five years was mentioned in the briefing, and I'd say that's a minimum.
Looking at the R00kw00d investment - I notice that there's a lot of emphasis on science and education and the arts, but not so much on just entertainment. There are water slides and golf courses, but that's not enough; you'll need more. Horse riding and motorcross spring to mind; I'll mull over this and see what else I can come up with.
Please get back to me soon, and don't forget the Ethiopia project data.

_________________
I will heed the advice of a polite horse for it is written that more flies are caught with honey than vinegar... although assault carbines and monstrous wolves are still fun.

"I aim to misbehave."

Asena - Pretty Rose
United Kingdom x5 Spain New Zealand Senegal Ghana x2 Benin Closed lad accounts x 180
Safari x 4 - Oyenka Chidinma - Lagos to Cotonou; Dickyboi - Lagos to Accra; Femmy - Lagos to Porto Novo; "Woody" - Accra to Singapore
Sand Timer x 7: Dufus & Abavana/Capt Joseph Annan/Victor Walla/Ohene Agyekum/James Jeffrey/Peace Akpobor & John Mensah/Tony Kalaby & Addo Gilbert
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SlapHappy
Baiting Guru


Joined: 15 May 2006
Posts: 9612
Location: Floating up and down with happiness.


PostPosted: Sun Dec 14, 2008 3:32 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Emil has been a bit lazy on the yacht lately, but he sent Richard this today. He has to get moving on Emil's roller coaster project. Smile
Quote:
Dear R1chard H3ad,

You do drawing or specification for me yet? Layouts and site planning maps for my roller coaster I need. And we need to acquire properties in area of coaster, who own, how much they sell for to me? I want coaster 10,000 meters long ok. That lot of land, but can go into water an underground, loops around, too. I want project under 100 million ok. Send land analyisis report, site parcel ownership information ok, and cost analysis profile spreadsheet. What you have now for me? Anything? Please advise fast ok. I enjoy time on yacht and back to school but be out on Christmas vacation soon ok.

I know you like picture of my girlfriend, you lie ok, because you ask if I sleep with her. So, I send you another ok. Houdini has scape again tody. I put him in cage lastt night befor going into Graanie's room. He sleeping when I see him lastt. Now Houdini gone. I'm very sad. I have Houdini 4 year now I love my hamster much. I look all day today, not fined him. Cat Snuffy help me look too fo Houdini. I tell Erdogan and Gustav to come help me fined Houdini. Norah Hubschebeine girlfrend come to help me look soon too. I hope Houdini not go outside, windo open lastt night. I been crying too, Richard fo Houdini.

Pees and luv.

Emil Smile
Also attached this pic for him: Smile

Image

edit: some l33ting

_________________
Sand Timer x Reven U., Fats Walla, Donny
Safari x10 Sand Timer X2 MM:Mikex2, JohnK, D@rlington, Ob1, Armstrong, Ismail, TG&Friend
Safari x3 Nancy, Security Guy, Robert Accra-Tamale
Safari Safari Sand Timer (19 mo.) Tina and Joe's Safari - Accra to Niger & Timbucktu
Safari Safari Z@ke & Charlie -Wulugu Or Bust Safari- Lagos to Paga & Tokwari X2 - 3800mi.
Golden Pith x3 H3ctor & C@leb - Yankar1 & Parakou
Safari x2 Charles and Friend-Amsterdam to Vatican
Safari Issac to Chad
Be A Cool Cat, Like Me Trophy Videos Cool Stuff
pony pony Closed lad accounts Mortar Goat Easter Egg 2011

Last edited by SlapHappy on Tue Dec 30, 2008 12:34 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Ninastian
419Eater is my life


Joined: 19 Sep 2006
Posts: 416


PostPosted: Tue Dec 16, 2008 2:08 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

This multi-bait is generating loads of work for the lad - one recent message from him was timed at 03:21 - a sure sign of a busy lad!

We've already got a folder-full of trophies, including this astonishing response to BluthBanana's hilarious scheme to raise the lost continent of Atlantis and create a kingdom of polygamists there:

Quote:
While you are still considering these two projects, I have worked out necessary plans to give your dream a test of reality. In other words, the bible says with Christ everything is possible. I don't know whether you are a Christian or not as a polygamist. Though, your religious faith doesn't have to do whether you are believer or not. In reality, I don't want to discourage you, but help you build your potential and assist your dreams come to life. You don't know how far I have gone with trying to help build in your ideas into something CONCRETE to be recognized world over as a great achiever! I assure you. Look- I didn't respond to your investment idea as quickly as you would require because I have taken my time to contact a few of our associates around the globe. Interestingly to note, a lot of scientists are working to discover that sunken island as you. However, according to sophisticated research, the Atlantis began between the ancient Athenians and the Atlantians 9,000 years before Plato's time. Did you base your knowledge of Atlantis as written by the scientist Plato? He was the first theorizer who wrote about the lost Atlantis continent. I think you should have heard of him if you have done a thoroughly research about Atlantis from inception (and destruction). Plato first gave the known account of Atlantis. According to him, he identified the Atlantis as a large island in the Atlantic Ocean, somewhere west of the Pillars of Hercules (the Rock of Gibraltar)? Is that the same location you assume was where it was?

Most scholars’ believed it was laid in the middle of Atlantic Ocean. So what have we if that was really the case? Would you consider refilling the sea with sand to turn to land? Originally, Plato's dialogues "Timeaus" and "Critias" are the only known original references to Atlantis, and many people believe it to be only a creation of the philosopher’s imagination designed to illustrate an argument about human nature.

Otherwise you said you were sure you know where it is located? Did you just researched but have never been there? The question is did Atlantis really exist - and where was it? A Greek geologist argued that the exact location of Atlantis is not known as the continent split into many sections that moved in different directions. Furthermore, archaeologists and adventurers have attempted to locate it in places ranging from Sweden to the Caribbean - but now, French scientist Jacques Collina-Girard thinks he may have finally tracked it down. According to him- Atlantis could have been in the Strait of Gibraltar between Spain and Morocco, where the rising sea level after the last ice age caused an island to be swallowed by the waves, but the popular knowledge believed to have sunk into the sea. In any case, you must know there are a lot of Atlantis hunters around the globe. Unfortunately, majority of them are not backed by any financial support to explore their machineries or geological requisites.

However, according a deep research there have been dozens — perhaps hundreds — of locations proposed for the classical Atlantis. A scientist in today's age said Atlantis could be found as far east as the Pyrenees and Morocco and as far west as the Yucatan, in Mexico. How true can this be? Another scientist said the Bahamas, however, might be the best place to look: Some are more-or-less serious attempts at legitimate scholarly or archaeological works; others have been made by psychic or other pseudoscientific means. As continental drift became better understood and accepted during the 1950s, most "Lost Continent" theories of Atlantis have been proven conclusively false. Of recent times, there is the argument that Atlantis is located between South America and Africa. How true can this be? Again, some researchers in the early 20th century believe that Atlantis is near the Azores Islands. The Azores are a group of islands belonging to Portugal located about 1500 km west of the Portuguese coast. Some people believe the islands are the mountaintops of the sunken continent of Atlantis. Some historians believe Atlantis could be located within the Easter Island in Tibet, Greece, Egypt, and Mayax (Mayan and Aztec Empires), the Basques of Spain, the Guals of France, the tribes of the Canary and Azores islands. Funny enough, a tribe in Holland, and dozens of Indian tribes all speak of their origins in a large lost and sunken Atlantic land in which they all believe. Could this be an indication that Atlantis really existed?

Because of these much controversies about this lost Atlantis Island here and there, I was tempted to order the book about this sunken island of Atlantis- with much emphasis on Plato (who wrote a proven fact about Atlantis from time immemorial). He was an Athenian philosopher who lived 9,000 year before the Atlantis supposed destruction by Tsunami (its island sank into the sea). His records about the Atlantis were based on dialogues among Socrates, Hermocrates, Timaeus, and Critias. Obviously, this will get us nowhere.

You can help us to help you, can you share what original information you have pertaining to your "supposed" true location of Atlantis, and so our team of geologist can review it. If we can get this Atlantis continent alive, I assure you there are a lot of investors who will be willing to support your business idea and to repopulate it. If you are ready to actualize your dream and make it your prime target, you have to think wisely and then invest in my idea. We can spin geologists and scientists at work.

There are a lot of developers (scientists, geologists, land surveyors) who are willing to work for you. You will have to pay several millions dollars for legal and professional charges UPFRONT to get all plans on deck. We will need do a feasibility study of the location first. They will- not me. They can explore the area (via world map), do a geological survey at diversified points and also carry out an organized expedition. This will involve jet travels, satelite search works and sea crusing by team of explorers. This won't be as easy as you may think.

Meanwhile, Confirm your interest in the African Investment projects while it lasts? Do we arrange a meeting to discuss this further including the Atlantis discovery project? Let me know what works for you. I think I have done a pretty good job for you thus far.

Remain blessed.


Sadly the chances of raising Atlantis are greater than our lad's chances of making any money from us. Very Happy

_________________
Safari Sea-Mugu, London-Is1e of Wight
Safari Safari dickboi, Lagos-Abidjan and Lagos-Accra
Closed lad accounts Several
Oh [the captive] ate his own willy!!! HAHAHAHA. I saw the look of excitement in his eyes like no other meat taste better!! yummm yummm! HAHAHAAHAHA. He cut his big right toe, his penis and penis shaft at different stages- funny funny funny!! He did this where some promiscous women do all sort of things. I know they were all thrilled. ahahahahahhhhhaaaaaa. His penis shaft was sewn to his nostril and more!! The doctor did a good job!! My men took picture of him parading him around the market square and public schools where everyone sang him wanker praises!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! I will continue to torture him unless I receive my $150,000 reward for wasting my time!! Period!
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Ninastian
419Eater is my life


Joined: 19 Sep 2006
Posts: 416


PostPosted: Tue Dec 16, 2008 2:19 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I've been meaning to update this thread for ages now, but the more modalities we develop, the harder it gets to find the time... Crying or Very sad

Then I had an idea - why not get the oga (=me) to demand a progress report from the lad? Sure enough, he has just obliged:

Quote:
Sir,

I am going to do all you say, but somehow I feel like I am doing the hardest jobs here! I am not complaining though only an assertion- besides every wise person would like to air their view on significant issues of this magnitude. Anyway, It will continue to give in my best to make sure all the mugus bring smile to our face in a grand style. lol...
Really, I don't know what status you needed to know again with this mugus, I make sure I forward you updates from the mugu? Each update I get from J W4lter I make sure I forward it to you so you can assess/review and advise me accordingly.
Well, I am going to provide you with summary (update status, current report and plan) on each of these mugus.

1. Emi1 Tischbein:
Current Report: Emi1 is waiting for me to provide his Roller Coaster Drawing, design, location (layouts and site planning maps), land analysis report of the Roller Coaster area, site parcel ownership information and cost analysis profile in a spreedsheet,and other programs to feature in the Roller Coaster opening ceremony.
Update Status: I am trying to make sure this documents etc are available by Friday (this week) the latest time possible.
Plan: If he insists on meeting associates involved in this project before he pays any fees, we will have to make necessary arrangement for that.

2. Captain M4lcolm Reynold:
Current Report: I have resent him an adjusted risk analysis and an updated company profiles involved in the Ethiopia project for his review etc.
Update Status: I am waiting for his comments on both investment needs. As soon as he is ready for us to get this project off the ground, I will try to arrange for him to visit Ethiopia. It depends on what he wants. Do you realize he has issue with his health not to be able to travel? Anyway, we will see. But the most important thing is that I am in control, but I dare not impose my decision on him, otherwise it no longer be called a "job" but extortion and assination (like you treated [our original mugu]..lol). I am so scared of my boss. Lol.
Plan: Get associates to seat him in Ethiopia (should he agrees) and then the purported Somalia pirate kidnap will ensue.

3. Dr. Mark H4yley:
Update Status: This is the "very" fresh stage to decide how is he, what he is, how he thinks and behaves etc. I make sure I forward you all his correspondences.
Current Report: Just sent him the first explanatory investment update.
Plan: I will get him to Ethiopia to meet investors. For USA meeting, I am not so sure about that for now, maybe I will persuade him to meet associates in the UK.

4. J W4lter We4therman,
Current Report: He is obviously waiting for my update. I am taking my time to plan things right. Patience is everything in this G-trade.
Update Status: He needs report outlining the groups I will be hiring to do all the various operations, a detailed description of how I plan on re-surfacing the continent [=Atlantis Rolling Eyes ] (with special care taken to make sure that it will not re-sink when populated), and finally a blueprint for the layout of the new polygamist establishment we plan on building on Atlantis to support re-habitation.
Plan: I will get him to the UK to meet with this groups I have hired before they actually embark on the discovery plans for the Atlantis.


Now that's what I call a busy lad! Very Happy

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BluthBanana
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Joined: 16 Sep 2008
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 16, 2008 3:23 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Loves it! Laughing

I have to admit I was astonished by all the work he must have put into "researching" the job I'm having him do. Obviously the location of the lost continent is a secret I'm not so willing to give up until I know everything is in place. Oh, and I will need to make sure I can trust everyone involved before I divulge the location... Twisted Evil

Hats off to you, Ninastian! You have this lad both fearing you and eating out of the palm of your hand! Very Happy I am thoroughly impressed that he's giving you such detailed progress reports. How often is he supposed to send them to you?

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SlapHappy
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 7:31 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Progress reports, too! LMAO! Laughing
This is what he replied to Emil. I love his personal touch and concern about Emil's lost hamster.
Quote:
R1chard H3ad to me
show details Dec 14 (2 days ago) Reply


Dear Emil,
You have to be a little patient Mr. Tischbein. You should have all the details very soon, at the very latest by Friday this week ok. You MUST know I am doing everything possible for you to have one of the best Roller Coasters in the world ok. It will go into water, underground and loops around ok. I am waiting for the design experts to provide me drawing and sketch work and an overview how it should look. Also, as per your request, I will have the land surveyors and real estate brokers look into the area of coaster and provide me land analysis report, site parcel ownership information, cost analysis profile spreadsheet ok. 10,000 metres is a lot of land, you definitely will have to acquire properties in the coaster area, in order to make your theme park superb! Great thought Emil. You must know that the engineering and construction team are ready to get you the best! But I will try to warn the team that you want a project under 100 million ok, so it doesn't cost so much because of the highest quality of a coaster you desire.
I like Norah's picture but it doesn't mean like I am in love with her ok? I am married and a Christian man. I don't flirt around. I stick to my wife only ok.
Norah looks like is a good cook. Oh the pizza looks good..... she made my mouth watering...lol. Have you seen Houdini yet? I feel bad that he escaped again, but I am sure he didn't go outside. Does the open window last night led him outside? Can you figure that out? I wish you find Houdini as quickly as possible because it is incorporated to give Houdini a special ride at the opening of your excellent and most innovative roller coaster.
Have a great evening.
R1chard H3ad
Laughing

edit: some l33ting

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Last edited by SlapHappy on Tue Dec 30, 2008 12:37 pm; edited 1 time in total
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SlapHappy
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 18, 2008 5:53 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Big progress! The roller coaster drawings are in! Laughing
Of course, even though they make nice simplistic wallpaper, they are not adequate. Mad Enjoy, anyway. Very Happy
Image

Image Razz

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Ninastian
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 9:28 am Reply with quoteBack to top

To be honest, this all looks a bit half-arsed. I have told the lad to check his design against Emil's original spec, which was:

Quote:
Minimum 12km ride length
Maximum height 100 metres
Six peaks of >75m
Maximum g-force 9g, to be achieved at three points in the ride
Trains to seat 32 people
Minimum height of riders 1.50m
At least 100m under water section
Firework display to be triggered for each night-time ride (minimum 50 bursts 200m above ground level)
Wood construction
Theme to be "The Best of YouTube" (you need to explain how you will interpret this)
To be opened and operational by summer season 2009
Location to be agreed - probably USA, Turkey or Egypyt (Red Sea Coast)
Specially designed t-shirt to be given to all riders on completion of ride
It will be called "The Tischbein Tornado"
Opening ceremony to be conducted by Jay-Zee and Barbra Streisand
Rollercoaster company to buy insurance indemnifying it against all injury claims etc
Ride must be visible from Google Earth
All Emil's friends to be given free rides in perpetuity
Special carriage for his pet hamster


Then Emil changed his mind a bit Very Happy

Quote:
I want it built in Tampa, home of the NFL's Tampa Bay Buccaneers
There must be underwater and underground sections as well as overground - in roughly equal proportions (ie one third each)
There must be two 1000 foot drops, 300 feet above ground and water, and 700 feet below (to take care of aviation issues)

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Oh [the captive] ate his own willy!!! HAHAHAHA. I saw the look of excitement in his eyes like no other meat taste better!! yummm yummm! HAHAHAAHAHA. He cut his big right toe, his penis and penis shaft at different stages- funny funny funny!! He did this where some promiscous women do all sort of things. I know they were all thrilled. ahahahahahhhhhaaaaaa. His penis shaft was sewn to his nostril and more!! The doctor did a good job!! My men took picture of him parading him around the market square and public schools where everyone sang him wanker praises!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! I will continue to torture him unless I receive my $150,000 reward for wasting my time!! Period!
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Inspector Gadget
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 11:16 am Reply with quoteBack to top

At least he has gone to the trouble of tracking down soft software so he could come up with a plan, I do worry about the garden shed in the middle of the second drawing though.
I only wish our Stanley was this productive.

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SlapHappy
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 11:32 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Yes, IG. He's also very excited to finish the project! He sent this to Oga Ninastian today:
Quote:
Sir,

I told you I was going to work on the measurement stuffs. I just sent you the drawing in an MS programme so you can view what I have done so far. I must say the drawing was the hardest part of the job.
We will make $95million whooping dollars in this trade. I am taking my time to incorporate and infuse all official jargons. LOL.
He's giddy! Laughing

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Yastreb
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 1:11 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Mal has found his dream project:

Quote:
I've decided that while R00kw00d has a lot to recommend it, investing in an amusement park just when a global financial crisis hits seems a tad counter-intuitive. The Ethiopia project seems both worthy and profitable - and a demonstration to the world that renewable energy is both viable and economically feasible.


However...

Quote:
Do you have contacts for the power companies? I'd be interested in hearing from them about the project - at the very least from Eur0elektr0gr0up, as they seem to be the front runners from what you said. I'm also waiting for that enhanced cost-benefit and risk analysis. Don't keep me waiting.


That was sent on Wednesday.

Today I sent him:

Quote:
I gave you a couple of basic tasks. What the Sam Fr1ck is keeping you?


And, even as I type this, a reply hit my inbox. I'll post details later as it's sorta late here.

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SlapHappy
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 1:38 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Richard finally sent me an update just now!
Quote:
I am sorry for keeping you waiting for so long. Good news is here. I just received an update notice from Roller Coaster designer experts and all other related teams that the necessary documents about your Coaster known as “T1schbein T0rnad0” will be available today. You have to keep checking your e-mail. I will make sure you have this documents which (costs of drawing, sketch work, costing etc) before 8PM UK time.

I am copying this e-mail to Sir Charles for his update purpose; because he is somehow worried as you over this drawing and costing issue. I think the long delays may have resulted perhaps because of the complexities involved with your “own” roller coaster specifications and its greatness at that. Please sit tight…. You will have the documents your way earliest ok?

In any case, I am truly sorry for every convenience this delay may have caused you.

Remain blessed.
R1chard H3ad


edit: some leeting

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Last edited by SlapHappy on Tue Dec 30, 2008 12:38 pm; edited 1 time in total
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FrumpyBB
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 1:46 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

What a bunch of knots - frightening!! Laughing
Must I really ride this??

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Yastreb
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 9:40 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

This arrived last night as I was posting:

Quote:
I am truly sorry for my late response Captain. I had a meeting the past few days in Kenya with some German investors who came to discuss with me ways they can accomplish the Ethiopia Rural Electrification project as private investors licensed under government ownership. Like you, they believe renewable energy is not just viable and economically feasible, but also very advantageous with right to receive huge proceeds in the long run.

I have contact of the Eur0elektr0gr0up CEO. His name is Pr3sh 4lexandr0 and he is a great talent in the administrative field. His official e-mail is eur0elektr0gr0upltd@hotmail.com. You can contact him. You have to let him know you are one of his company's potential investors under the umbrella of P0st-H0c C0unter-L3v3raged F1scal St1mulus Der1vat1ves.He will be glad to provide you additional information you would expect.

I also have e-mail contact of one the board of directors of the National 3lectricity C0rp0rati0n of 5udan (one of the shortlisted power companies). His name is Dr. Haf1z 0guns. His personal e-mail is: haf1zabs@yahoo.com. He may not be very friendly because we don't have much in common, unless you want to be one of his company's investor? I can help you though.

What enchanced cost- benefit and risk analysis do you want me to send to you again? I did send it to you before now? Or do you think I have to get you a revised copy? I don't understand. Please explain.


Two more characters for him... this is an ambitious Lad; but then he thinks he's playing for high stakes.

BTW - shouldn't we be l33ting bigtime on this one? We don't want to risk it being blown... cf. SlapHappy's last report and some others on this page.

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beckythatcher
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 9:44 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

How do you get on and off? Definitely the design needs to be reworked.

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SlapHappy
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 10:01 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Another email, and the project report is finally in! A sweet pdf. Laughing
Yes, Becky, I think things aren't quite right with that coaster. Wink

Quote:
Mr. Emil Tischbein,

I have just received the necessary start up documents. As it stands, there are a lot we have to do- starting from negotiating with brokers to purchase the site location (lots of land) needed for your roller coaster projection in Tampa. I have gone through the files; I saw that two options were given. I have a few associate attorneys in the US who can assist us with all the necessary procedure. I might have to travel to the US sometime to seal off some of the legal proceedings. In the meantime, but to hasten up, you will have to make deposit of at least $20 million for the construction firms to purchase necessary materials for the actual construction, while we begin necessary processes to secure necessary approvals for the project to be undertaken ok? You have to contact Mr. Rick Jeffs for more information. I think I agree with him. I guess he is trying to help you minimize cost of buying materials for your coaster. In other words, he is trying to help you save higher costs of purchasing wooding materials and rail equipments in the New Year. His e-mail is shown on the documents attached. Though, we will not fail to guide you where necessary and to ensure your best interest is very- well protected.
I can recommend two of my associates in the UK to guide you as regarding the bank to bank transaction. Meanwhile, you will have to pay $2 million for all our professional legal and financial services both in the US, UK and other continents where your best interest will be well protected for this success of this project. We will provide you an account for our start up fees (40%) of it- then after your Roller Coaster plans become actualized you pay up the balance. I could also get one of my associates to meet with you to this effect in order to sign our legal agreement. Let me know what you advice as time is in essence. Well let me warn you: If you need your roller coaster project completed before Summer 2009, I am afraid you will have to do what I say. I assure Sir Charles I wasn't going to let you down, but take you very seriously as though my own life is involved. I am copying this e-mail to him so he is very well acquainted of the progress made thus far.

Yours in service,
Remain blessed,
R1chard H3ad.


Here's the lad's detailed project report. Enjoy the insanity. Very Happy

T1schbein T0rnad0 Project.pdf
http://www.4shared.com/file/76759154/ebda147f/T1schbein_T0rnad0_Project.html

edit: some l33ting

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Last edited by SlapHappy on Tue Dec 30, 2008 11:56 pm; edited 2 times in total
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robertbobberson
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 10:25 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

The technical data blows my mind
Quote:

Duration: 1.15 seconds
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seminal
Not quite a Newb


Joined: 04 Jun 2008
Posts: 73


PostPosted: Sat Dec 20, 2008 4:40 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

That is a genuinely brilliant trophy!

It even looks as though he hasnt Googled a lot of the stuff on the document! If he buckled down at a real job, he could actually contribute quite a bit to the community!

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Yastreb
Demented Opportunist


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 20, 2008 11:23 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

He gave me two new characters to write to - power company CEOs; Pr3sh 4l3xandr0 and Haf1z 0gans. Mal has written to them both.

Dick also got a slap for this:

Quote:
What enchanced cost- benefit and risk analysis do you want me to send to you again? I did send it to you before now? Or do you think I have to get you a revised copy? I don't understand. Please explain.


Quote:
I don't want you to send the "enhanced cost-benefit and risk analysis" again - you never sent it to me in the first place. What you sent me was vagueness personified. I need hard data and actual figures. Do that please.

_________________
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"I aim to misbehave."

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