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 I think he wants me to leave my office now?

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asiaguy
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Joined: 14 Apr 2006
Posts: 1180
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 11:25 am Reply with quoteBack to top

The foreign remittance director of Ecobank in Nigeria has been to Money Gram 4 times already with coffee stained, crumpled, or missing digit receipts. All have failed. Slap sessions have erupted over who was at fault.

The Lad has been sending me mails with a link to the real Ecobank website.
I told that Lad that I contacted Ecobank via the weblink he sent me and received the service fee payee account number. I produced a receipt of full payment of fees from Ecobank and he should now send me my millions.

I think my Lad wants me to leave my office now...

Quote:
LEAVE YOUR OFFICE NOW AND GO TO MAKE THE PAYMENT NOW OK. THE MONEY SENT IS NOT RECEIVED AND WILL NOT BE RECEIVED UNTIL YOU SEND IT TO THE MONEY INFORMATION I SENT YOU. I WILL LIKE YOU TO TAKE INTO YOUR SCULL THAT IF YOU DON’T LEAVE YOUR OFFICE AND GO DOWN TO MONEY AND SEND THE FEE TO THE NAME I GAVE, YOUR ORGANIZATION WILL LOOSE THIS FUND SO YOU SHOULD LEAVE YOUR OFFICE NOW AND GO DOWN TO MONEY GRAM AND SEND THE FEE TO MAYOR PAUL MY SECRETARY.
BE INFORMED THAT YOU DON’T HAVE TO OUR WEBSITE FOR ANY REASON AND I STRONGLY BELIEVE THAT TODAY IS THE LAST DAY FOR YOUR ORGANIZATION TO SEND THIS FEE BECAUSE I CAN’T SEE THE REASON WHY THAT YOU CANNOT LEAVE YOUR OFFICE NOW OR HOUSE TO GO TO MONEY TO SEND FEE THAT WILL FACILITATE YOUR ORGANIZATION TO RECEIVE THEIR $9.4 MILLION DOLLARS THAT YOU HAVE NOT SEEN ALL YOU LIFE.
WARNING: IF YOU DON’T LEAVE YOUR OFFICE NOW AND SEND THE FEE TODAY TO THE NAME MAYOR PAUL, YOUR ORGANIZATION WILL LOOSE THIS FUND AND THAT IS FINAL. OK. SO YOU SHOULD LEAVE YOUR OFFICE NOW AND GO TO MONEY AND PAY MY SECRETARY MAYOR PAUL. I WILL NOT TOLLRATE ANY MORE DELAY FROM YOU SO GO AND LEAVE YOUR OFFICE AND SEND THE MONEY NOW. OK.
YOURS FAITHFULLY
DR. J0HN 4D4MS,
CHIEF DIRECTOR, FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPT.
ECOBANK OF NIGERIA PLC.

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GomerPyle
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Joined: 04 Jan 2007
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 12:05 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Of course you can't do that as you have to be on hand in case the Lad calls, and the office boy you entrust with this task, Reginald Dalrymple, is a well meaning chap but not very bright, and slightly absent minded with a penchant for Battenburg cake and rapberry ice cream soda.

Do MG do phone banking ? Very Happy

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Inspector Gadget
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 1:51 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
LEAVE YOUR OFFICE NOW


Using Ladspeak (2009) TranslatorTM

I got the following :

Quote:
Please remain where you are and send me more iffy receipts.


Especially one in the name of Major Pull.

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Diana Prince
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 2:49 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Does the Lad want you to voyage to the payment site by rowing there in a small boat?

Quote:
I WILL LIKE YOU TO TAKE INTO YOUR SCULL


There's ice in the river where I live right now. . . that could be a downright dangerous journey in some climes!
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Reaper
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 3:04 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

He seems a bit on edge. A tiny bit anxious and impatient perhaps. I'd calm him down by telling him that at least one person is relaxed in this business deal. You're about to take a small holiday, on a houseboat. Powered by Oars. At least you'll be sculling to the office. Laughing

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Trixi
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 3:15 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Send him a message saying that you've "Left the office".

Then ignore him for at least 2 days. Any B/S he gives you just say "I did what YOU told me - I LEFT MY OFFICE!"

The tell him you went sculling as he suggested. But as it was cold you fell in the river and caught flu and nearly died so you don't think you'll be doing that again.

Twisted Evil

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yournamehere
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 3:15 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

the least you can do is send him an out-of-office reply to make him happy...
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YeaWhatever
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 3:19 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I love emails like this. Can't you feel the utter frustration this guy must be feeling? You can practically taste it. He probably has not had a payday in quite some time and now one appears to be right around the corner. Naturally, you will have to find some way for the eventual problems to be totally his fault. Perhaps if you keep writing him back, asking why he stopped writing (even though he will be frantically writing several times a day) he will stress out so bad that he will blow a gasket. What could be more frustrating than thinking that none of your emails are getting to the person that you are sending them to?

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