Shutting down lads addys...boo!

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Posted: Tue Jan 13, 2009 7:18 pm

Had a nice little time waster bait going based on nothing but puerile humour but my last reply has been bounced a couple of times...Bah!

The lad, Prince, opened with a run of the mill gold opportunity but I was after something else.

Quote:

Dear Prince,

Thankyou for your email regarding business opportunities. My name is Arry Obble and I am the Overseer of Durtbocks Building, Blagging and Paving Company. Our main line of work is proving suitable building products to the construction industry.

My company is currently looking for supplies of Stiffie Rock. Are you able to provide this? Our standard price we pay for this particular rock is £150 per brick. We must insist however that all Stiffie's provided must have a prominent blue vein.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Arry 0bble
Overseer, Durtb0cks BBP

Lad replies...

Quote:

Dear Arry Obble
.
Thanks for your mail. i wish to inform you that according to what you stated in your mail. on the demand for the building brick products I can supply it to your company as soon as you give full detail information on how many container feet your company needed it as this will enable me start arranging for the supply without further delay.It is important for me to have your full contact address and phone number as this will get us started.

Looking forward to hear from you.
Prince Kofi .

I need more information before I can answer that though Prince!

Quote:

Dear Prince,

I will need a little information regarding your stiffie. I am not too familiar with the grades of stiffie rock as I have only recently took over the running of Durtbocks BBP from my Father due to his illness. To be entirely truthful I know very little about the business of rocks so I am hoping you can guide me.

How big is your stiffie? I am told that the average length is around 6 inches but I am ideally looking for supplies around half that size. Could you give me a measurement of your stiffie?

Does the blue vein run through your stiffie or is it knotted on top? I prefer one that has a knotted vein running along the top.

What colour is your stiffie? It seems there is a lot of different colours and that most of the Stiffies in Africa are of a dark brown colour. I myself find a dark brown stiffie to be more than satisfactory.

Yours Sincerely,

Arry Obble
Overseer, Durtbocks BBP

Lad seems keen to please

Quote:

Dear Arry Obble.

Thanks for your mail and your request for more detail information concerning the bricks rock.At this point i want to let you know that there are many sizes and different colors and the supply depends on what you want, as you already know the one that is best in your country.

In Stocks are: 3 inches bricks with blue vein run through it
3 inches bricks with blue vein on top
3 inches bricks with dark brown color

6 inches bricks with blue vein run through it
6 inches bricks with blue vein on top
6 inches bricks with dark brown color.
There are other different colors but all depend on the color you needed as i have told you.

I look forward to hear from you.
Prince Kofi

Bricks? BRICKS??? This won't do - How else am I supposed to get my cheap giggles if he won't join in the terminology?

Quote:

Prince Kofi,

Are these normal bricks you are offering or genuinely sourced stiffie rock? We specialise in developments on coastal sites and therefore use a lot of Stiffies due to their higher resistance to water. Normal house bricks are too porous and therefore can lead to problems with structural stability further down the line. Therefore, to help avoid confusion could you refer to them as "Stiffies" rather than "Bricks". This is the normal practice here in the UK.

We will soon be closing down for the Christmas holidays. During this time I will look at our current stock levels and then contact you with our requirements.

I wish you merry Christmas and a happy New Year.

Arry Obble.
Overseer, Durtbocks BBP

He got back with a rather mundane Happy Christmas message and a e-card - what the hell makes these lads think those make any difference???

I emailed him back after Christmas - holiday homes to indicate money and I'm somewhat vague about my sexuality, lads get a bit skittish around that kind of stuff.

Quote:

Dear Prince,

How was your Christmas? Mine was very peaceful and it is a shame that I have had to come back to work! I took my partner to our holiday home in Barbados for a week. It is nice to have a bit of sunshine as the weather is terribly cold here in the UK.

Anyway, onto business!

Our stocks are currently running a little low so it may be possible that you could help us. I would be very interested to purchase 3 Inch Stiffies, Brown Coloured with Blue Vein on Top. We are looking to buy around 10,000 of these. If we make a bulk order of this size though we would expect a considerable discount, therefore I am willing to offer $900,000 for an order this size.

If you can supply this and are happy with the price then please let me know.

Arry Obble,
Overseer, Durtbocks BBP

I sent it 3 times and got 3 bounces - awww poo, he could have been fun Crying or Very sad

Posted: Tue Jan 13, 2009 7:25 pm

if your lad has any brain cells, he will have saved your email address somewhere.

there is still hope, fingers crossed....

Posted: Tue Jan 13, 2009 7:44 pm

Once I get a really good lad, I always get a couple of email addies for him, to stop this from happening. I have been burned on it before.

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