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 S**T DAY!

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notobescammed
Radio Man


Joined: 03 Jun 2007
Posts: 878
Location: Behind the Microphone...


PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 5:37 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Hi Everyone

I have had a totally crap day today (not the worst) but still crap!

Anyway, I need cheering up so can someone tell me a joke or something to put a smile back on my face?

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you are trying to ask me if Iam a robber? is this correct? - Dr Usman
My own version meaning of the word (SCAM) {The Transaction you will start that will never end! - Kw3s1
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bill2
Baiting Guru


Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 5496
Location: Yeah who can tell me where I am?


PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 5:42 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

This was all planned a long time ago Wink
Quote:
http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=134462&start=225


Cheer up, there will be better days too

beers!

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Doodle Bug
Master of Master Baiters


Joined: 06 Feb 2008
Posts: 720


PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 5:51 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Dr Dr I think I am a pair of curtains

Pull yourself together boom boom Smile

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FUCK OFF. DONT CONTACT ME ANYMORE
you must tell the truth at least you supposed to tell me the truth.
i am not here to check or look for people piss in the streets of Abidjan
Who is this person Mickey Mouse???
trying to dercieve hoorable men like me. You are stupid man ok.

Last edited by Doodle Bug on Thu Nov 13, 2008 5:54 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Craig007
rude right wing fascist


Joined: 19 Apr 2007
Posts: 3124


PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 5:54 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Thats not an excuse for you not to reply to my PMs!

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Donato
Baiting Guru


Joined: 07 Jan 2007
Posts: 2923


PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:43 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:

“ Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?" ”

The second place finisher and early leader was this joke, submitted by Geoff Anandappa of Blackpool:
“ Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were going camping. They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night Holmes woke Watson up and said: "Watson, look up at the stars and tell me, what do you see?"

Watson replied: "I see millions and millions of stars."

Holmes said: "And what do you deduce from that?"

Watson replied: "Well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like earth out there. And if there are a few planets like earth out there, there might also be life."

And Holmes said: "Watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent."


While this was the top joke in the UK:
“ A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you." ”

In Australia the top joke was as follows:
“ A woman rushed to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off: "Doctor, take a look at me. When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were bloodshot and bugging out, and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What's WRONG with me, Doctor!?"

The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says: "Well, I can tell you that there ain't nothing wrong with your eyesight."

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United States
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Jayhawk
Baiting Guru


Joined: 07 Jul 2006
Posts: 5163


PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 7:08 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
A parrot, a goat, a rabbi and a giraffe walk into a bar. The bartender takes a look at them and says "What is this, a joke?".


Quote:
A parrot walks into a bar, goes up to the bartender and says "Got any crackers?". The bartender says "nope, this is a bar", and the parrot leaves. Next day, same thing. Parrot walks into the bar, goes up to the bartender and says "Got any crackers?". Bartender repeats what he told the parrot earlier, and the parrot hops down and leaves the bar. Next day, same thing. Every day for a week, at exactly the same time, the parrot would go up to the bartender and ask "Got any crackers?".

After a week of this, the parrot enters the bar once again, at the same time, and asks the bartender "Got any crackers?". The bartender finally snaps. "Look", the bartender says, "I've had it with you. I'm telling you right now, if you come in here one more time I'm going to nail your claws to the floor. Got it?"

The parrot takes a look at the bartender, turns around and leaves the bar.

Next day, at the same time, the parrot comes in the bar. All eyes are on the parrot as he hops up on the bar, looks at the (by now fuming) bartender, and says "Got any nails?". The bartender, somewhat stunned, looks at the parrot and says "No, I don't have any nails. This is a bar." The parrot thinks for a minute, and finally goes "Got any crackers?"


ba-dum-dum I'll be here all week. Tip your mods.

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Pachanga
Baiting Guru


Joined: 04 Dec 2005
Posts: 3551


PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 7:18 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

A blind man walks into a store with his seeing-eye dog. Suddenly, he picks the dog up and swings it around by its tail. The store owner is horrified and asks the blind man what he is doing. The blind man replies "Just looking around."

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notobescammed
Radio Man


Joined: 03 Jun 2007
Posts: 878
Location: Behind the Microphone...


PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 7:23 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I knew i could rely on you guys.... I'm smiling again now....

Jayhawk.... I tipped nursenasty $20 (i put it down her bra even) so i expect you to stay around all week Laughing

_________________
Listen to my show live every Sunday at 6pm UK, 1pm US! Just log onto www.blogtalkradio.com/ibc and click listen live!
If you missed a show, or to listen to your favorite shows - log onto www.blogtalkradio.com/ibc and click archived segments!
Internet's Biggest Conversation - Where Scammers are Scammed into reality Live!

you are trying to ask me if Iam a robber? is this correct? - Dr Usman
My own version meaning of the word (SCAM) {The Transaction you will start that will never end! - Kw3s1
Sometimes the truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off - Kw3s1

Pith Helmet Birthday Safari - Co Bait with FrumpyBB and Redshoes17

Click here to support 419Eater.com Nurse Nastys Audi TT
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Breddan Butter
Retired Moderator


Joined: 09 Dec 2003
Posts: 4170
Location: Soligorsk, Belarus


PostPosted: Thu Nov 13, 2008 10:30 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Now you are happy we can revert to putting jokes in the long-standing thread HERE

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