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Master Baiter Joined: 15 Nov 2008 Posts: 210

You think you hate her now, you just wait.

Twisted Evil

Posted: Thu Feb 19, 2009 5:08 am

Rapheal looks forward to hating Betty...

Master Baiter Joined: 15 Nov 2008 Posts: 210

Betty responded.

Being accused of racism just plays into Betty's hands. Now when you support our lad over Betty she has one more reason to run off with the funds.

Posted: Thu Feb 19, 2009 10:46 pm

People at work were wondering why I was laughing so hard, that was awesome!

Posted: Thu Feb 19, 2009 11:47 pm

Betty says >SLAP< to the mugu! Nice work!

Master Baiter Joined: 15 Nov 2008 Posts: 210

My usual baiting persona is a bit befuddled, willing to forgive mistakes, and sympathetic to the plight of the lad. It is great fun to play a take no shit lad-slapper like Betty.

Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 10:20 pm

Well, lad is asking for a phone contact. Maybe someone needs to explain that for legal reasons we prefer to keep all communications via email, for reference, later.

Or, we need a good phone person.

Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 1:50 pm

Or, just ignore phone request:

Raphael, worrying that Betty is involved in some financial f*¢kery, wrote:

Dear Obi Wan,

I am not sure what is going on. We were going to have a meeting this
morning at the church, and Betty didn't even show up!

And, don't believe Betty. She is looking for excuses to not send you
the money. Right now, it's a toss up as to wether or not you will get
the funds. Certainly some of us want to get you the money, but Betty
really doesn't like you, for some reason, apart from wanting to send
the funds to Lando, and Betty is part of the reason we get the
funding. She is very nice to people who don't have to work with her,
but she is a really mean person.

You need to write the Bishop and Howard and tell them, very carefully,
how Betty has revealed her self to be unfriendly to your church.

I spoke with some church members, Leia and Luke, and their friend Han,
who is new to the church, and if the funds go to Lando, next month we
will try to get some funds for you. That is dependent on them getting
to Alderan to meet with the council.

So, Obi Wan, please do not give up hope. You have friends here.

Blessings,

Raphael C Musa

I think Betty needs to be more assertive, channel her inner bitch/control freak/thief.....

Master Baiter Joined: 04 May 2007 Posts: 187

He really needs to answer the most important question of all: Does the Sixth Commandment, “Thou shalt not commit adultery”, include goats?

Sermon’s today at 11:30, sans goats, but he must answer before the Bishop’s Tuesday night Bible class.

Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 4:49 pm

Well, Betty needs to runnoft with the funds, me thinks.

Juan's stalker Joined: 28 Aug 2008 Posts: 1423

Quote:

That is dependent on them getting
to Alderan to meet with the council.

So, Obi Wan, please do not give up hope.

You sound like Obi Wan's only hope,lol...

Glad to see some of these funny emails y'all have been teasing us with.

That Betty sure does sound like a greedy conniving witch. Razz

Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 7:43 pm

Dearest Beloved Dramaqueen,

May the Force be with you!

Remain bless.

Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 7:46 pm

Let's tone down the goat molesting references just a bit. I may have pushed it a bit too far, with the lad anyhow. Laughing

Juan's stalker Joined: 28 Aug 2008 Posts: 1423

^^^^ I wanna read that! Laughing

One of my lads called himself a fat silly goat last night.....

@Doc williams and may the force be with you too dearest. Wink

Master Baiter Joined: 15 Nov 2008 Posts: 210

I snuck off for a few days of skiing but I am back and ready to torture our lad some more.

Betty just sent another angry e-mail. She won't run off with the money until you (the funding board) confirm that you are going to send the funds to Africa. When she gets that news, she will have a public flip out followed by a diappearance.

I think that the Bishop should be the one to officially announce that we are going to send the money to Africa. I have a few choice words planned for him. Twisted Evil

Master Baiter Joined: 15 Nov 2008 Posts: 210

Betty got two seperate apologies. Too little, too late.

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 6:18 pm

Our lad is writing PLENTY right now, hoping to get those funds! I am writing an angry email to Betty. I will break the news that the board decided to fund the African project, and that I have confirmed this in person with the Bishop.

That should ratchet up the screws on our buddies nuts just a bit.

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 6:28 pm

A seriously perturbed Raphael, wrote:

Look, you low wattage dim bulb, you KNEW the meeting was to decide wether or not to send the funds to our brethren in Africa, and YOU decided not to be there. We postposed starting the meeting for one whole hour, and Luke and Leia used Hans cell phone to call yours, and you turned yours off! You can spout your lies and nonsense, and blah, blah, blah, blah, a-choo, gezundheit, pass the kleenex and God Bless you, too, okay? but I know what is going on, and Lando got funded in the last cycle, and we need to spread the Lords money around to places that need it. As you well know, we still don't know what happened to the $45,000 that they cannot account for.

I just met with the Bishop, and he says that he expected you at the meeting (which I knew because, unlike you, I WAS THERE!), and that he is in accord with the council, and the funds will be going to Africa.

Please return the cheque book and the funding requisition forms to the office today, so that we can write a cheque and get a bank transfer. I will be in my office for the rest of the day. Please give them to my receptionist.

I am so angry at your attitude. This is a church, not your feudal empire.

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 6:29 pm

BTW, I am laughing at the teaching of the "offspring" of human/goat relations...

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 7:37 pm

This is just too funny not to share:

Quote:

Dear Sir,
Hope you are alright today,Below is answers to your questions:
1.No,its not considerable for a man to cohabit with a goat.Its
not called for.Its very wrong,not acceptable in this part of the earth
even our congregation here is totally agaisnt it.Its a sin,an abomination
in the sight of God and man.Even the canal people here(unbelievers) are
not practicing it.Its against every law here in Nigeria.A humanbeing should
not by any means have sexual relationship with a goat being it man or woman.
Its madness,a wrong act and wrong life.

2.Married couples will only be permitted to have sexual relationship with the
opposite sex.Husband and wife not goats.Goats are domestic animals.Man and
woman cares for them but absolutely not for sex at all.The he and she goats
have its own way.They are on their on class and category.They're not humans.
They are their animal ideas.Therefore,a goat cannot marry to a man or woman.

3.Awoman is a humanbeing that deserves self diginity and respect.Nothing should
connect her giving her body to animal(goat).Her body is the temple of God as the
Scripture teaches.She should keep it holy and not to defile it.Nothing at all should
connect or lure a woman to have sex with a he goat.Its abomination,forbidden here.
Even though the woman is possess or out of sense,its wrong and we never experience
such wrong act here.A woman having sexual relationship with a he he goat is abnormal.
Its a sin against God and man.Its forbidden in our church and the regions here.

Finally,the offspring of such a union who involve in such sinful and dangerous act can
be taught by our congregation not to follow such character as it can lead to contacting
of deadly diseases.We preach repentence to the offspring,encourage them to live a Godly
life.to resist from sin and immorality.Not to follow the deadly,dangerous and humiliating
manner/ugly behaviour of their parents.We shall let them know that abstinence from such
corruption and sin from their parents will leads them to better and victorious christain life.
Our congregation will correct the offspring of evil character from their parents to resist from such,to live a better life in Christ JESUS.

In faith,

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 8:07 pm

Wow. That is so loaded with sig material it would be a hard choice

"Therefore,a goat cannot marry to a man or woman."
or
"A woman having sexual relationship with a he he goat is abnormal."
or
"Nothing at all should
connect or lure a woman to have sex with a he goat"

Priceless, really. If only I had room, I would put it in my sig line.

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 8:09 pm

"A woman having sexual relationship with a he he goat is abnormal."

So it's abnormal to have sex with a laughing goat? What if the goat is serious?

Posted: Mon Feb 23, 2009 8:29 pm

I think that, if one has any relationship, one should take it seriously...

Juan's stalker Joined: 28 Aug 2008 Posts: 1423

Quote:

Luke and Leia used Hans cell phone to call yours, and you turned yours off!

That's hysterical !!! I almost fell out of my chair.

Quote:

Lando got funded in the last cycle.

Did he now? Hmmmm.

Quote:

2.Married couples will only be permitted to have sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

Of goat?
So does that mean the wife can have relations with a male goat?
The husband can have relations with a female goat?
Just not the same sex as the goat?
Very confusing and Ewwwww...

Master Baiter Joined: 04 May 2007 Posts: 187

Bishoρ Lαvαn just read the lad’s response.

Rενεerεπd. Hαyεs wrote:

No,its not considerable for a man to cohabit with a goat… :yikes:

Now I need to thank him for that mental image. With a straight face; I’m not sure he has the ability to twig, but I’m not pushing this any farther.

(In the Bishop’s defense, a certain member of the congregation did in fact ask about the goats. His name may or may not have been Hοωαrd Iπchεs. We all thank him for his concern about the morals of foolish young goats.)

Also, Bishoρ Lαvαn needs to respond to the whole back-and-forth about Bεtty’s shenanigans, but I can’t think of the right response. Do I call Bεtty on the lie?

In Faith,
—Bιshoρ Lαναn Hα’αrαmι
Scαrεd Hαrt Church

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