Unto The Lord The Mugu Did say 'Please G0d, B4sh Me' - Done

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Wannabe Baiter Joined: 10 Jul 2008 Posts: 98

I have been a bad boy, altho It cant be helped.

I have stolen some possible T.W.4.T. members. The newly formed Church 0F Th3 H0ly B4sh has begin recruiting new members.

I have setup a website inspired by the tw4t and set about getting the name around. I setup auto responders on my usual cather accounts to say the accounts were closed please goto the website for more details (the url is in the email) etc. and about a week later I got this in my church catcher account.........

Quote:

Hello Pastor,
How are you and the members of your church h0ly b45h. I know my mail will be very surprise but nevertheless iam R4M0N G0M3Z by name from west africa. I got your website and i decided to write to you. Iam a members of Christ Embassy church here in west africa,

But 8months now i have not been going to church because of my situation now,i think all hope have gone. It was 2days ago i was searching and i decovered that there is a church called (CHURCH OF H0LY B45H) and i read everything and i understand is the kind of church i needed to worship. Iam the only child of my parent,it was 3years ago i lost my daddy and my mummy in the motor accident.Since then i was suffering know one could help me to stand. All my cousins left me alone. Iam on the street now looking a better solution to stand as a man but i found no help to build up my own family,as you can see iam the only person of my parents and i lost them 3years ago,iam alone now. I need to make them happy in there grave to settle down and build my own family that can bear the name of my daddy and mother. Iwant to join your church as a full member of Church B4sh and strong members. But iam very far away are you people have a branch in africa?

And what process can i make it to become a strong members of church b4sh?
But in one condition, My situation now i dont like it and i want anything i put hands it will be moving well and my enemies will not see me in my progress.

Finally, iam very poor and how to feed my self was very difficult. Iam sleeping on long the street,when i decovered your contact i said i most write to you people if you people will accept me to become a member of your church i will be happy.

Iam 28yrs old. The problem is that when i put my hands in something is not working with me. I have sold 1 plot of land my late daddy left for me in the villiage to make my travel to eruope to start a new life the money was diverted just like that.

The agent that doing the eruope visa eat my money i dont have power to fight for him till now he have not given me the money. Iwill stop here untill i hear from you. I want to become a full members of your church and i hope when i do my life will change for good?bye for now untill i hear from you. Send my greetings to all the full members of church b4sh.

R4M0N G0M3Z.

he seemed so eager I could hardly control myself.....
i sent this back

Quote:

Hello Ramon,
I pray for your life my son, God will help you in your path.

The Church 0f The H0ly B45h does not have any churches in africa yet but we are looking to find someone who can be a Pastor there for us.

But you must understand that the membership process is very strict and can not be changed for anyone. To become a full member you are expected to complete a St0ne R0und H0use as a mark of your faith to The Church 0f The H0ly B45h. The first step is to complete our membership application.

You Must also understand that we are unable to send any money until membership has been completed.

if you wish to join our Church I can arrange to have the membership form emailed to you.

I look forward to hearing from you again,

God is blessed as are you.

his reply

Quote:

Hello good morning pastor, Iam very greatful to received your mail this morning,i really understand the hole thing. I have already accepted to be a full membership to your church.

But i can start established your church and besides i have alot of friends that can join me in your church,but there have been asking me what rules and regulation it will take i told them i have not hear from you people. Please can you tell us the rules and regulation on the process avoid any mistake. But i have accepted now to established your church here in africa but i dont have the power to do that. You know to become a pastor is not easy thing.

Iam ready and my friends are fully ready to join the Church 0f The H0ly B45h. So tell me how can everything work perfectly here, because you people are very far away from me.and which country are u people haven churches? and which country are you now writting with me. We are ready to join the church. Our condition here is very difficult how to feed is very hard i cannot hide my feelings ok. hope to hear from you people.

Send My Regards to full members of Church 0f The H0ly B45h.

i sent off my application forms to him and 3 days later (he did keep me informed along the way saying he had to get the forms printed and then scanned etc, hes a good boy)........

can anyone make out what is written on the top of page 2?

he did make a mistake, it does clearly states that he is required to pose with the last page of the form....

i fired this back at him

Quote:

Hello Ramon,
thank you for your application. We we will review it today.

there is however one problem. the photograph you have provided is unacceptable. the instructions were that you were to hold page 7 of the application form and have your photograph taken with it. the photograph needs to have the page and yourself clearly visible. I have attached the page again so you know which one i need. unfortunately we will be unable to complete your application without the photograph as required.

please get back to me soon with the picture so we can speed up and complete your application.

Gods Love

naturaly he tried to get out of it,

Quote:

Thanks for your urgent response. I was be able to try my possible best to scan the application
form today and to send it back to you. You mean i should snap a picture with the page 7 you
send to me now through attachment file? You said i should hold the page 7 with two hand and
take my photography? Pastor to be frank with you the picture i scan to you with the attachment
of the application i borrow money to do that. I have explain to you my present condition here is
critical now iam sleeping on the street no home for me. How can i borrow money again to snap a
picture with the page 7 form send to me now. Things was very difficult for me here ,how to eat is by God grace. Hoping to hear from you soon.

slappy slap slap

Quote:

Dear Ramon,
I explained to you at the beginning what was required, you even asked about the photograph. It is also explained in the application form what has to be done.

i also explained that the application process is very strict and we can not complete your application without the photograph, that too is explained in the application form.

i also explained that I am unable to provide any money to non-members and as you have not completed the application process you are not a member and subsequently i can not give you any money.

We are a church of gods love and gods grace but we are not fools. we offer funds to people who have shown their faith to god and the church of the h0ly b4sh. if you are willing and faithful to god he will find a way for you to take the photograph as needed. use your love for him to complete this process and when you are a member you will have access to the £124 million at the cathedral.

we have the application process in place as it is to stop con men and fraudsters from attempting to get their hands onto our millions. the process is not easy and it will test your faith. for us to measure your faith you need to follow simple instructions.

it states on the application form that if we are sent a form with no photograph we are to stop the application, you have also signed section 7 stating that you have attached the photograph and understand the consequences of not doing so. I should stop your application now and end all contact with you.

however as i understand that you are in a difficult situation and the fact that i am a god fearing man and do not want to upset the balance of life i will, on this occasion only, hold back your application until i have received the photograph as described.

if you can email me the photograph please do so i will hold your application until Tuesday night at which point i will have to destroy it and cease all contact with you.

Gods Love to you

ahh hes a good little doggy

Quote:

Hello pastor,
Thanks for your urgent response. I understand what you said but i just want to know whether i will hold page 7 and snap the picture? as soon i hear from you i will do that ok.

My mind is made-up to become a full members of Holy B4sh. I have full interest to join the church of holy b4sh that is why iam asking this questions avoid any mistake ok. As soon i hear from you iam going to try my possible best to snap a picture with the application form.

I repeat again, can i hold the page and snap picture? Iam seriously to become a member of the church of Holy B4sh. Iam waiting to hear from you now so that i can snap the picture.

Best Regard.

i can almost see it now....

Quote:

Hello paqstor,
How are you and the members of the Church of The H0ly B4sh, hope there are doing so
wonderful. Iam very greatful for your urgent response. Iam going to take the picture today.

Best Regard.

and well here it is, my first trophy Smile

Hes now waiting for the membership secretary to contact him about his application. r4m0n has said that he has a friend who is filling in the application form right now and wants to join. I have suggested they join forces for the building of the st0ne r0und h0use.........

i noticed in this email and others that i receive, that where it mentions the church name is it enclosed in ( ) i can only assume that they are entering the name into a script and they can only be unaware that they need to remove the () before sending?

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 2:38 pm

Those are wicked glasses.

See if you can get him to send them to you. Laughing

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 2:59 pm

Great trophy!
Congrats Wink

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 3:20 pm

Nicely done! Thumbs up

Section 4... so awesome! Very Happy

419Eater is my life Joined: 22 Sep 2008 Posts: 381

Section 4 is great. The whole thing is great.

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 10 Jul 2008 Posts: 98

^^^ thanks, i was in tears when i wrote section 4 and most of it, but having someone fill it in i nearly died Smile

he has just emailed me saying his friend is having his picture taken tonight so i expect there will be another application tomorrow Smile

419Eater is my life Joined: 22 Sep 2008 Posts: 381

Quote:

I will not kill myself rather I kill the young girl to saving the world

Also priceless

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 4:47 pm

^^ ! He will definitly burn in hell Twisted Evil

This is great stuf .

Master Baiter Joined: 07 Oct 2008 Posts: 116

Scam Sandwich wrote:

can anyone make out what is written on the top of page 2?

hmmmm, it's French. The bottom line is "promotion" can be translated as "development". "imobilere", maybe something to do with real estate. "ouvrages divers" means "various works", possibly "odd jobs".

Editing as I get a closer look at the line above : hydraulic (or water), research, financing. The word under the Bible clipart might be some form of "renovations".

It could be that some real estate guy left his last page on the public scanner not realizing there was one line left on it, and then the lad just started his printing on that page. Or maybe it's someone the lad is working for. That would be so cool!

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 10 Jul 2008 Posts: 98

^^^ lol thanks, wonder what would happen if he got caught using the scanner by his boss Smile

i wonder if he'll make a similar mistake again......

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 7:22 pm

I am glad I wandered into your thread SS. What a wonderful candidate to your church. He was so good as to fallow the instructions you gave him (with the one do-over).

I agree with the comments above. The glasses are priceless! The trophy is pure gold. Very Happy

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 8:47 pm

Well done.

As for the glasses most people in OZ will be only to familiar with a similar pair http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2EDtxEumFI

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 9:00 pm

Ooooooo great trophies !! Laughing

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 10 Jul 2008 Posts: 98

he has sent me his friends application... thats two in in two days... i'll post the pages later...

i'll have them on to stage two later today Smile

Not quite a Newb Joined: 02 Mar 2008 Posts: 57

So, if he attends church twice a day, but prays 3 or more times a week, what does he do the rest of the time? Surprised

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 10 Jul 2008 Posts: 98

^^^ maybe he tries to scam people?

but would a man of god do such a devilish thing? Smile

Master Baiter Joined: 19 Apr 2007 Posts: 108

Scam Sandwich wrote:

^^^ lol thanks, wonder what would happen if he got caught using the scanner by his boss Smile

i wonder if he'll make a similar mistake again......

Maybe a sheet of headed paper left in the fresh paper feed of the printer or copier by the previous user?
(I've done it myself many times, but as I'm the boss (and also the only member of staff Very Happy

), I've can't blame anyone else! )

Posted: Tue Oct 14, 2008 1:53 pm

Absolute Gold!!! Section 4 was priceless, there are tears on my keyboard from reading that!!!!

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 10 Jul 2008 Posts: 98

heres r4m0ns friends application Smile

he doesnt look very impressed in the photograph Smile

he has read section 4 before filling it in Smile

Posted: Tue Oct 14, 2008 2:03 pm

I've found his perfect girlfriend based on his sunglasses design.

Brilliant baiting, and I am sure you have much evil pleasure to come from this.

It looks as if his shirt was made out of old magazines.

Posted: Tue Oct 14, 2008 2:33 pm

Great going. Do you plan any rituals?

Master Baiter Joined: 08 Sep 2008 Posts: 113

Classic. And I liked the bit about the lottery ticket. He'll beg, oh and yeah, give them the ticket.

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 10 Jul 2008 Posts: 98

Well not sure about rituals yet, I dont want to scare him off Smile

i'm just firing off the instruction to build a St0ne R0und H0use, so we shall see where that gets us.

Posted: Tue Oct 14, 2008 8:45 pm

How lovely glasses!

He looks like Mugatu after a safari under the burning sun...

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 10 Jul 2008 Posts: 98

i sent out the instructions for a st0ne r0und h0use and he fired this back at me.

i think its lovely ofhim to offer to go on a safari and god only knows why he thinks i want him to build a cathedral Smile

excuse the caps but that what he wrote to me.

Quote:

I HAVE RECEIVED YOUR MAIL YOU DATED TODAY. I READ IT WITH MY FRIEND
IKECHUKWU TOGETHER. WE DONT REALLY UNDERSTAND WHAT EXACTLY YOU
MEAN TO BUILD THE STONE ROUND HOUSE. FOR MY LITTLE KNOWLEDGED AND WHAT I UNDERSTAND IS THAT WE HAVE TO LOOK AN A PLACE TO SET UP
THE CATHERAL IS THAT WHAT YOU MEAN? WE HAVE MAKE-UP OUR MIND TO BECOME A FULL MEMBERS OF THE CHURCH. WE CAN LOOK FOR A PLACE WERE WE CAN BUILD THE STONE ROUND THE HOUSE. IAM TELLING YOU NOW WE ARE NOT GOING TO BUILD THE STONE ROUND HOUSE HERE IN SENEGAL DUE TO OF LANGUAGE AND ENVIROMENT OF THE COUNTRY AND SECONDLY THERE ARE VERY SMAIL IN POPULATION. WHAT THERE SPEAK IS WOLOF IT WAS VERY DIFFICULT FOR US TO MAKE IT HERE. I AND MY FRIEND HAVE MAKE UP OUR MIND TO BUILD THE CATHERAL IN WEST AFRICAN GHANA BECAUSE THAT PLACE IS AN ENGLISH SPEAKING COUNTRY AND BESIDES I HAVE BEEN THERE BEFORE I KNOW WERE I CAN GO AND SEE A EVERY PERFECT PLACE TO SET UP A CATHERAL.WE HAVE TO MOVE TO GHANA AND SET UP THE STONE ROUND HOUSE THERE. BUT THE PROBLEM NOW IS MONEY PROBLEM GOING TO GHANA WE HAVE TO TAKE FLIGHT TO GO THERE AND LOOK FOR A BETTER PLACE WERE WE CAN BUILD THE STONE ROUND HOUSE. I WANT YOU PEOPLE TO TRUST US WE ARE NOT A SUCH PEOPLE THAT CAN DIVERT YOUR
MONEY YOU PEOPLE HAVE SEND TO US TO MAKE SURE EVERYTHING WORK ACCORDING TO THE PLAN OF THE CHURCH 0F THE H0LY B45H. THAT IS THE PROMISE WE ARE FULLY ACCEPTED BUT EVERYTHING IS MONEY AS YOU CAN SEE THE CRITICAL CONDITION WE ARE NOW. WE ARE NOT GOING TO DO THAT , THAT IS THE PROMISE WE HAVE MADE TO YOU.FINALLY YOU PEOPLE HAVE TO SEND A CONSTRUCTION COMPANY DOWN IN GHANA IN WEST AFRICAN TO COME AND BUILD THE CHURCH OF THE H0LY B45H. I HOPE IT WAS THIS YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT AND IF IS NOT WHAT YOU REALLY MEAN PLEASE KINDLY EXPLAIN BETTER TO US TO UNDERSTAND. WE ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO HEAR FROM YOU SOON. TO BE FRANK WITH YOU WE DOESNT HAVE MONEY AND BESIDES WE HAVE SPEND ALOT MONEY BY PAYING FOR CYBER CAFE REPLYING YOU TO MAKE SURE I REPLY YOU PEOPLE SO FASTER AND THE SCANING OF THE APPLICATION FORM HAVE COST US MONEY. I HAVE MANY FRIEND OUT HERE LOOKING FORWARD TO JOIN IT WAS DUE TO MONEY THERE CONDITION IS DISAME I AND MY FRIEND TOO. REPLY ME BACK HAVE A WONDERFUL NIGHT AND ALSO SEND MY REGARDS TO THE FULL MEMBERS OF THE CHURCH OF THE H0LY B45H. IF WE DOESNT UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEAN KINDLY LET US KNOW. WE ARE REALLY GREATFUL FOR YOUR KINDNESS TO? MAKE SURE EVERYTHING WORK. IAM HONEST GUY AND ANY OF MY FRIENDS IS HONEST LIKE ME TOO. WHAT EVER I TOLD YOU IS REALITY OK. I THINK I WILL TOP HERE UNTILL I HEAR FROM YOU SOON.
FROM R4M0N G0MEZ AND IKECHUKWU MYFRIEND.

this is what i sent back

Quote:

Hello Brother Ram0n,

The building of the st0ne r0und h0use is a test of your faith. where you decide to build the house is upto you. THe st0ne r0und h0use is not a cathedral it is no larger than a single room.

the instructions explain that YOU and your friend must build it not a construction company.

I have also mentioned that becuase it is a test of your faith and your way of showing willing to the Church Of The H0ly b45h that we can not and will not give out any money until after the stone house has been built.

If you wish to fly to Ghana to build the stone round house that is perfectly ok but you must accept that the church will give no money until after the house has been built.

If you have any other question please email me again.

Blessed gods faith on you.

i'm still awaiting his reply.......

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