My barrister died :(

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Posted: Wed Oct 22, 2008 4:25 pm

Quote:

Dear Mr. Hank,

I thank you very much for your kindness towards my late husband and his entire family. I am pleased with your effort and the love you have showned to us the entire family members of late Barrister Mohammed Bello.

I wiil want you to understand that i am mourning the death of my husband for now, i dont think i can organize the fun run now because in Africa things dont work out that way.

Mr.Hank i will be very greatful if you can please send the money you have raised so far, Although it is a good advice to organize a fun run in Accra Ghana, i promise you the fun run will be orgainze later but not now.

Have a great day and God bless you.
hope to hear from you soon.

Truly yours,
Mrs. Bello

Quote:

Dear Mrs. Bello,

I understand your grief and I would not press you to organize the fun run at this time, however there is the issue of taxes that I mentioned in my previous e-mail.

The longer Globex has to hold charity funds the more we are taxed at the end of our fiscal quarter. Also, the IRS has unfortunately been keeping a close eye on Globex for "irregularities", although we have done nothing technically illegal in our financial department. I just wouldn't want the money we raised for you to be frozen along with the rest of Globex's cash assets in case of an unannounced audit. This is why I feel you should organize the event as soon as possible.

Gov. Pillock said some state funds may be in the pipeline as well if the run in Ghana is able to be carried off.

I say a prayer for you every night, Mrs. Bello.

Yours in spirit,
Hank

Posted: Wed Oct 22, 2008 11:13 pm

Nice one Worf. That was the perfect response. I believed you. Wink

Posted: Thu Oct 23, 2008 1:16 am

Hmm... this is interesting. I just got an email from a certain Ahmed Bello... coincidence or same guy? Maybe it's his brother...

Posted: Thu Oct 23, 2008 4:09 pm

Quote:

Dear Mr.Hank,

Thank you for your mail, Once again i don't think that organizing the fun run can be possible, and if that will stop you from assisting me and my family no problem.

The Almighty God will provide.

Mrs. Bello

Geez, way to be all reasonable about it. Evil or Very Mad

Is it time to question her motives now?

Trophy Videos · Posted: Thu Oct 23, 2008 8:18 pm

I think it might be too much work for her. Lads do hate that four letter word. Smile

Posted: Thu Oct 23, 2008 10:28 pm

Frickin' lazy mother %$^$&$%&$&*^%*&%^$*&

Well Worf, I suggest recycling your modality now. I'll keep the newspaper and images handing for a re-edit if you like.

However, you still have the $18,000 she may want. It might be time to send the money to your business associate across the border, who can give it to her in cash. Tell her it's the only way to get the money to her because of the 'tax man' will need a cut if it leaves the country by any other means.

How did you respond to this lazy git? I hope you asked if God had a spare $18k and frowned upon laziness.

You've decided to donate the money to victims of fraud instead. You've been contacted by another gentleman in Ghana who has a business proposition for you you wish to exploit. You've decided to buy that elephant hide pool cover?

Posted: Thu Oct 23, 2008 11:08 pm

What a great modality. Keep us posted if you get another bait going.

Posted: Fri Oct 24, 2008 2:44 am

I am honoured to see the use of my "irregularities" in there. My two cents just went to five (with rounding up of course) Laughing

Because I'm at work when I see these, I don't get to bait yet but I love to contribute in at least some small way.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri Oct 24, 2008 1:44 pm

SlapHappy wrote:

I think it might be too much work for her. Lads do hate that four letter word. Smile

By this, I didn't mean to imply that I thought the bait was over. If they write back, it's still not over. So what other work do you have for them, that doesn't sound like work? I'd tell them you are really disappointed in their non-Globex attitude, though. It's bumming me out, Worf. Cool

Master Baiter Joined: 26 Jun 2007 Posts: 110

i think there is plenty of options left for making the grief process abit harder Twisted Evil

Posted: Fri Oct 24, 2008 9:34 pm

Yes, I'm not finished with Frank Taylor/Mrs. Bello yet Twisted Evil

Quote:

Dear Mrs. Bello,

Perhaps one of your neighbors could help with the fun run?

Here at Globex, we're all about helping neighbors, as I'm sure you've realized by now. Cypress Creek is full of neighborly neighbors. People who help dreams come true for other people - although some dreams may vary from those of Globex Corporation, its subsidiaries and shareholders.

This is just an alternative suggestion. Gov. Pillock also promised he would match whatever you raise. Or send you money even if you don't raise anything. To be honest, Gov. Pillock just likes the idea of an international fun run and has gobbed his smarmy political hands onto Globex's success. Anyway, he just wants pictures of a Globex Fun Run in Ghana. I really shouldn't be telling you this, but I want to be honest with you and help you. And I need Gov. Pillock to stay friendly towards Globex in the halls of politics, if you know what I mean.

Sincerely,
Hank

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri Oct 24, 2008 10:21 pm

^^Nice email, Worf. Smile

Now, can her little lazy peabrain grasp and emulate the benevolent, humanistic nature of the Globex Corporation?
Will she truly become a fine example for the company? Smile

Eventually, the answer will be yes! Laughing

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 2:11 pm

Quote:

Dear Hank,

Thank you for the mail, i have decided to organize the fun run tommorrow Sunday to be pricise immediately after the church service by 12 noon. I will keep you updated.

Have a nice weekend and God bless.

Regards,
Mrs. Bello

Well, that was quite a turn around!

Quote:

Dear Mrs. Bello,

Awesome! This is great news!

Be sure to take lots of pictures.

Sincerely,
Hank

I'll believe the lad once I see proof though.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 2:49 pm

Fun runs are like love though, worf, better the second time around... Laughing

They could always organise another run, if need be.

Master Baiter Joined: 26 Jun 2007 Posts: 110

can't wait to see pics Twisted Evil

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 9:16 pm

Excellent News Worf!

She's organised for the banners also?

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 11:06 pm

Well, since she reversed course so suddenly and decided to do the run today, I didn't get to the banners part yet Embarassed

.

Like SlapHappy said, they can always run again Twisted Evil

(if they even did really do the run today, which I doubt).

Posted: Sun Oct 26, 2008 11:45 pm

Lets hope she/he did get you those promotional photographs. How else are you going to promote the event and show the IRS that this event and all collected funds are for a charity and not anything else? Let's hope Mrs.Bello doesn't cause you any tax issues.

Very Happy

Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2008 3:55 pm

Quote:

Dear Hank,

Thank you for the mail, the fun run was a nice one i only raised $420 US dollars. as for the pics i am having problem with my scaner.

Thanks,

Mrs. Bello

Hey, a busted scanner is Hank's excuse for everything. That and a busted printer. The Globex IT department ain't that great.

Quote:

Dear Mrs. Bello,

That is okay regarding the amount. Every little bit helps, you know?

As for the pictures, I do need those as soon as possible. Gov. Pillock insisted on pictures and banners to promote the event. As you saw in the run Globex held, we had really big banners. I hope you took pictures of your banners too.

Of course, I also need your pictures for the IRS to show that all the collected funds are for charity and that this doesn't cause any tax issues.

Sincerely,
Hank

Meanwhile, Frank, the original client of our poor deceased barrister, takes a break from playing Mrs. Bello to remind me of his existence:

Quote:

Hankster,

How are you ? hope all is well if so splendid. it as been a long time i heard from you hope know problem.

Regards,

Frank

No problem Frank, just really busy with this fun run stuff!

Quote:

Frankster,

No things are going well. Did you know that Mrs. Bello organized her own fun run?

What a great woman, that woman! I'll forward her pictures to you once I get them. Boy, this fun run event has really taken off. Even the Governor is backing it.

Yes!,
Hank

Trophy Videos · Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2008 5:19 pm

Well, Globex doesn't care if it's the original fun run, they just need those pics. (The pics were destroyed in a fire excuse coming next?) It's really not that hard to do the run one more time, is it? And running is always fun! Everytime you do it! Laughing

Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2008 10:01 pm

I agree.

Quote:

Hello Hank,

How are you? nice to read your mail and its great to hear that Mrs Bello could get the Fun Run going. So how are you doing to help her now that she has done the fun run? Try and send the money to her so that she can help her kids and her self.

Thanks for your support and God bless.

Frank.

Quote:

Frankie,

Not to worry. Gov. Pillock said he would release the funds as soon as we get her pictures from the fun run for promotional purposes. We kind of need them as proof that this was an international effort so IRS doesn't get on our tail. Stupid government rules!

It should be really soon, she just has to get her scanner fixed. Perhaps you could go over and help her. I'd love to, but I can't get to Ghana this week. I could always have Mr. Drax from our IT department e-mail her with some tips if necessary - although Globex's IT department leaves something to be desire, to be perfectly honest. But still, it can't hurt!

Ta,
Hank

Master Baiter Joined: 26 Jun 2007 Posts: 110

Hope the widow managed to get the scanner going Twisted Evil

any news or developments? Smile

Posted: Thu Oct 30, 2008 11:40 pm

One of Globex's IT guys is going to call her tomorrow Laughing

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2008 1:48 am

Great, worf! Looking forward to that tech support call. I'd like to see that scammer (oops! I mean scanner) working again. Very Happy

Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2008 12:38 pm

Just read through this and I am in tears. I just love the way you've turned the whole thing into a Simpsons episode, or should that be movie.
Brilliant