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Acer
419Eater is my life
Joined: 11 Jun 2006
Posts: 289
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Posted:
Mon Jun 30, 2008 6:47 pm |
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So I've proposed to my lad that he become my business/sales representative in Africa. He believes that he will receive a massive signing bonus and an expense account of at least $1,000 a week to peddle my product. He also plans on simply taking the signing check and disappearing.
I'm in the business of inventing environmentally friendly products that anyone can use, so of course I need to make sure that all of my employees are dedicated to saving the environment, so I make them write an essay before I begin the hiring process.
From me:
Quote: |
Mr. Lad,
*snip*
But I am glad that you have expressed interest in my proposal to accept the position as a representative of my company in Africa. I'm still very much in the building block phase of establishing DDP as a worldwide provider of easy and efficient supplier of environmental products, but I have very high hopes for the results my endeavors can yield. It may not be much, but we need to take every step possible to help provide a safe and clean earth for our future generations.
Before we proceed any further, I'd like to make a request of you that I generally make of all my prospective clients, just to get a feel of how you stand on environmental issues. I've found that in the past I can use this tool as a means to get a better feeling and an understanding of who I'm working with, where they stand on the issues, and what they have to offer my company.
What I would like is an essay of approximately 1,000 words based on a few factors:
What you have done or plan to do to help substantiate a better environmental culture for our future.
What your stance is on Global Warming, and the impact it has had on society.
What you would like to see our perspective world governments do to ensure the future and safety of the environment.
Your opinion on the Kyoto Protocol.
And what caused you to get involved in the current environmental crisis.
Anything you say can be of your own free opinion, and it will have absolutely no negative impact in any future hiring agenda or motives held by my company. Like I said, this is just a method I like to use to get a better understanding of my employees or potential employees.
I don't want to you to feel rushed on this, but due to circumstances, I would like to have the completed essay by this coming Tuesday or Wednesday at the latest, in which I can expediate the hiring process and we can get this moving along. After you have completed the essay, we can then proceed to the application and hiring process, which is quite simple.
Thanks,
Me |
Low and behold, he must have worked some overtime this weekend, and I got this today:
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Dear Me,
Good day and thaks for your mail as a matter of fact i have no too much ideal of your questions but this is little i can answer for now .
Thanks once again .
Best regar.
Mr. Lad
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Question 1 What you have done or plan to do to help substantiate a better environmental culture for our future.
I have believe in my skills and my ability to do the job and convince people to buy my own product to be come a salesperson .in order to sell myself in the employment market also I have nervous to trouble talking about myself and my product, for that ,I can demonstrate how my product can react on them, so they will begin to focus on what my product can do for them.
Question 2 What your stance is on Global Warming, and the impact it has had on society.
Scientists have concluded and believe that human activities are contributing to global warming by adding large amounts of heat-trapping gases to the atmosphere condition, and the sun's also contribute enormous energy warms the earth's surface .
Question 3 What you would like to see our perspective world governments do to ensure the future and safety of the environment.
I will like to see our perspective world governments to ensure our future and safety of our environment to focus on the high developing our neighbouring areas, of course this also has a regional perspective, but I think it is important to hold on to the idea that this is a initiative with international inspiration. It reflects an ambition of presence, activity and knowledge in a long term.
Question 4 Your opinion on the Kyoto Protocol.
Personal Kyoto is a tool developed in the open lab at eyebeam, for example By analyzing your fuel usage information for our motor we can calculate a Kyoto the amount you need to reduce per month to achieve something like what the Kyoto protocol require from you.
This means what you consume every month on your motor so we can calculate the effectively make you Kyoto protocol compliant at least for your fuel usage in a big component of fuel consumption . There are many ways to reduce your electric use, but there's not really a good way to monitor your progress and that's what Personal kyoto provides
Question 5 And what caused you to get involved in the current environmental crisis.
(a) lack of human rights or world peace (b) environment violence (c) in local parent , homelessness (d) child safety or rights and world hunger (e) lack literarily ,good health or Sex education . |
Most of it's pretty generic, but there are a few good laughs in there.
I haven't bothered checking to see whether or not there are actually 1,000 words there yet though . |
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Donato
Baiting Guru
Joined: 07 Jan 2007
Posts: 2922
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Posted:
Mon Jun 30, 2008 7:10 pm |
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Slap Him...
From Question 1~education MS Office word count thing says 400. |
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smartbomb
** Retired **
Joined: 14 May 2007
Posts: 750
Location: Air
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Posted:
Mon Jun 30, 2008 10:39 pm |
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Quote: |
convince people to buy my own product to be come a salesperson |
be come ??
he's cheating ! |
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Acer
419Eater is my life
Joined: 11 Jun 2006
Posts: 289
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Posted:
Mon Jun 30, 2008 11:23 pm |
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Donato wrote: |
Slap Him...
From Question 1~education MS Office word count thing says 400. |
I'm kind of leery about slapping this lad. He's already quite suspicious of me as it is.
But then again rules are rules. |
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thomas-the-tank
Elite Baiter
Joined: 18 Aug 2007
Posts: 1087
Location: Wherever I want the lads to think I am
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Posted:
Tue Jul 01, 2008 12:27 am |
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acerbus80 wrote: |
He's already quite suspicious of me as it is. |
There's no need for him to be suspicious - the rules are very strict concerning employment in this kind of work and you have to ask questions that may not seem immediately relevant, but will make perfect sense once the business is running smoothly. |
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Acer
419Eater is my life
Joined: 11 Jun 2006
Posts: 289
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Posted:
Tue Jul 01, 2008 4:41 am |
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Nah, he's suspcious because I've been baiting him with two characters, and he's already accused me of it. It has nothing to do with the business deal.
He (lad) started scamming the environmentalist (Kenny) with his usual scam. Kenny eventually introduced him to a black market pet dealer (Donald). The deal with Donald went sour, and Donald informed the lad that unless he played by Donald's rules, he would narc on the lad to Kenny and potentially cause the lad a bunch of money. Kenny's a fool with a lot of money by the way.
The lad eventually caught wind that perhaps Donald and Kenny were the same person, and has been quite cautious since then. I've been working for the last two weeks or so to convince the lad that Donald and Kenny are not one and the same, and so far it's been going pretty smooth. |
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ParaNoid
** REMEMBERED **
Joined: 12 Sep 2006
Posts: 5123
Location: Looking for Steward.
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Posted:
Tue Jul 01, 2008 4:55 am |
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The answer to Question 2 is a bit dodgy. It is just lifted from some website, and you asked what his view is, not what some other commentator says. I'll bet that if you put that sentence in Google, you could find the source(s).
Bad Lad, no bone. For sure, he needs to find another 600 words... |
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