Tikva the Spider-Slayer

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Posted: Thu May 22, 2008 1:03 am

A cat-thread a day keeps the doctor away.

So I've got giant spiders in the basement. Big frickin' huge spiderzillas. Now normally, I've got a live-and-let-live policy towards the creepy crawly kingdom, but I've also got a nasty spiderweb phobia, and these babies make humonganormous webs all over the place in late summer. Like over the back door, for example. Did I mention the spiders themselves are big? I think I did. So while I'll tolorate, for example, the black spider in my bathroom, and the house centipedes in the sinks, I've got a grudge against the Arachnids That Ate Manhattan here.

So yesterday, I'm peacefully postwhoring in the safety of my own basement, when my brother starts making noise and pointing near my feet. Guess what had decided to take a stroll in my personal space? Right!

Well, never fear, there was a cat in the basement. After all, cats love small moving objects and strings, so a small wiggly creature that comes with its own string should be a hit, right? And our newest family member, Sammy, was lounging peacefully on the floor nearby.

"Sammy, here, spider for you. Nice new toy for you." Sammy trotted over to see what was the fuss. "Sammy, look." From a safe distance, I prodded the spider with a cat toy. "Sammy, it's moving! It's wiggling! Come catch it, for God's sake!"

Sammy patted the spider. It moved. He patted it again. It froze, and he lost interest and walked away.

"Sammy! Get over here! Look, I've made it move again."

Sammy halfheartedly patted it a few more times, and then lost it behind the computer desk. So there it ended for the day, with an evil giant spider still on the loose in our house.

Today Little Bro spotted it again. This time, it was near the treadmill- clearly a subterfuge to make us think it wasn't rubbing its eight legs together and plotting our doom. Samson wasn't around- not that I was expecting much after his performance yesterday.

I approached the spider, cup in hand- and before it could train its weapons of mass destruction on me, I had captured it between cup and paper tissue. Heart pounding, I managed to flip over the cup without exposing any gaps in the tissue. The spider tried to climb out, but she couldn't get a grip on the wax coating. I gengerly picked up the cup, and carried it to my bedroom, lair of Tikva the Spider-Slayer.

I put the cup in front of Tikva. She sniffed interestedly.

"Look, Tikva, a spider! See, it's wriggling and everything. Remember that spider you ate last year?"

Tikva sniffed again. And again. Her body tensed into the posture she shows before attacking a catnip mouse.

"That's it! Good girl, Tikki."

She gingerly lifted one multi-colored paw, and poked in the cup. Sniff. Poke. Poke. Poke. Now she was pawing at the inside of the cup. Poke. Paw. Paw. Paw. It almost looked like she was trying to scoop-

"Tikki, you're not trying to take that spider out of the cup, are you?"

Yes, she was. Another scoop, and she had stopped pawing the cup and and was sniffing around in her pet bed. I tiptoed over to the cup. It was empty.

"Tikki, you didn't just let a giant spider loose in my room, did you?"

Tikva ignored me, pawing and poking at the seams in her pet bed. I could only stand and watch as she made a grab for it, lost, and found it again in another seam. It appeared to be walking around the perimeter and Tikva revolved with it. Then, she dived, and- what was that? Crunching? Yes, Tikva was chewing on something, and looking very contented with herself. I told her she was a good kitty, a very good kitty yes she was, my brave spider killer.

And the moral of the story is, "Use the 'better mousetrap', and spiders will beat a path from your door". Very Happy

Baiting Guru Joined: 19 Mar 2007 Posts: 2628

Its bad luck to kill a spider.

We've found our cat is fond of moths

There, happy CY.
Bet everyone was worried it would turn into a cat thread an irk the mods

Posted: Fri May 23, 2008 7:34 pm

CY, I read this thread and I was just filled with jealousy. Mr. Green

We have a lazy git cat that does ONLY what he wants. I have even posted a picture of him here and that din't help his laziness one bit. I thought posting his pic here might help him to feel more like a celeb and actually get him to do something.

Nope, now he just stares at me... Rolling Eyes

He is the reason I don't usually join cat threads. I am just emparrassed to admit that I am owned by a cat. Embarassed

Listen to Nanny, she knows about spiders... Shocked

Posted: Fri May 23, 2008 10:14 pm

ParaNoid wrote:

Nope, now he just stares at me... Rolling Eyes

No, that's not true at all, he does not stare at you. You are just paranoid, dear ParaNoid Cool

Posted: Fri May 23, 2008 11:46 pm

My two cats are almost worthless as spider killers. The male is the only one barely interested in spiders and other creepy, crawly things. He causally touches them with his paw a few times and usually walks away bored. Occasionally he will accidentally kill one of the more fragile spiders for which he gets a kitty treat. He will run himself ragged chasing a laser pointer dot, but barely wiggles a whisker when a spider crosses his path.

Hair spray is a great spider killer. I tried teaching my cats to spray the spiders, but that was a complete waste of time. I have to spray the spiders myself which can be best described as spray, run and cautiously checking to see if it is dead. A huge wad of paper towels is required to pick up the dead spider and to make sure there is no chance of it touching me. The spiders never appear when my boyfriend is around. They wait until he leaves then come out to torment me.

Posted: Sat May 24, 2008 12:25 am

I'm a heavy-duty arachnophobe, so when my cat Deja attacked and brought down a large and hairy huntsman*, I was rather pleased with her.. which is a rare thing, because otherwise she takes feline aloofness and selfishness to new extremes.

*Yes, I know they're harmless, but reason flies out the window when the phobia kicks in.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sat May 24, 2008 3:00 am

My cat used to kill spiders, but one day he ate a big one. They must not taste too good, because he won't even touch them anymore. But, he's a good boy, as he always stares at the walls or ceiling if there is one there, so I can go and kill them. And he can see the tiniest ones, the size if the sharpened point of a pencil. So, i can't fault him too much. He traps them, just doesn't kill them. Cool

Posted: Sat May 24, 2008 3:32 am

I have a dog who acts like a cat. She's a Maltese and likes to bite Golden Retrievers then run away. Confused

Master Baiter Joined: 05 May 2008 Posts: 104

My house is weird in this respect. I have 9 cats and 5 dogs. The dogs are a LOT more bothered by spiders and flies and things. The cats dont give a s**t, but it might be that they are just older (we havent bought a cat in any of our dog's lifetimes) and less bothered.

Even our dogs are weird. Our largest dog (a Male Whippet/Border Collie) once caught a pheasant and decided to lick it, whereas our smallest dog (a Bichon frise- three months old) thinks its RAMBO and once caught a rat bigger than she was.

Point is, our two whippet/border collies almost put themselves on fly-catching duty in the summer and spent most afternoons going mental in the conservatory. The cats lie around in the lounge wondering what the fuss is all about.