Stupid/Funny or RANDOM Link/Joke of the Day

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Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 8:05 pm

I took apart the GIF at www.gifworks.com , 34 frames in total, cos I thought it was fake, for a while she changed at almost every 10 revolutions, as it has to do with Left and Right brain functions try some arithmetic while watching then try moving. But it is almost like learning to juggle, try to hard and you just won't get it, let it happen and you've 3 balls in the air...wahoo! Laughing

Now a new thing for the giggles! some fantastic soundboards here Click

Including Gordon Ramsey, James Cagney and one I've been praying for!! Chopper

Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 6:08 pm

Posted: Mon Sep 08, 2008 11:48 am

I would enjoy using the Gordon F***ing Ramsey soundboard on a lad.

Here the BBC are branding a regular container, and tracking it by GPS as it travels the world. If you spot it, take a pic and send it to them.

LINK

LOCATOR

Posted: Tue Sep 09, 2008 11:02 pm

A young Italian man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and that he is going to get married. He says,'Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring over 3 women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry.'

The mother agrees. The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while. He then says, 'Okay, Ma, guess which one I'm going to marry?' She immediately replies,'The one on the right.'

'That's amazing, Ma. You're right. Shocked

How did you know?'

The Italian mother replies, 'I don't like her.' Rolling Eyes

Posted: Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:08 am

A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. 'Human beings are the only animals that stutter', she says.

A little girl raises her hand. 'I had a kitty-cat who stuttered', she volunteered.

The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.

'Well', she began, 'I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!'

'That must've been scary', said the teacher.

'It sure was', said the little girl. 'My kitty raised his back, went 'Fffff, Fffff, Fffff'...And before he could say 'F***', the Rottweiler ate him!'

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 4:45 am

Here's a nice Porn link for all the girls:

http://www.theinternetnowinhandybookform.com/PornForGirlsByGirls/

Posted: Sun Sep 14, 2008 8:48 pm

^^ That site http://www.theinternetnowinhandybookform.com is hilarious! Browse around on Kakbay, Schmapple, Ammaszone, Bahoogle, and Poormatch for some extra fun!

Posted: Tue Sep 16, 2008 12:59 pm

Interesting Picture

*** BANNED *** Joined: 18 Jul 2004 Posts: 2049

Corona wrote:

To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

Reminds me of Steven Wright

Quote:

Last night, I walked up to this beautiful woman in a bar and
asked her, "Do you live around here often?" She said, "You're
wearing two different colored socks." I said, "Yes, but to me
they're the same because I go by thickness." Then she asked,
"How do you feel?" and I said, "Well, you know when you're
sitting on a chair and you lean back so you're just on two legs
then you lean too far and you almost fall over but at the last
second you catch yourself? I feel like that all the time."

fixed quote tag -Ima

*** BANNED *** Joined: 18 Jul 2004 Posts: 2049

Correct use of HTML brackets

Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 5:54 pm

I hope this doesn't count as political
http://www.comics.com/comics/kitncarlyle/archive/images/kitncarlyle2008203790918.gif

Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 9:36 pm

forstersound.com/kiosk/BEER_TRUCK.pps

It's 3meg but worth a look. If you can't download it I'll Pm it.

Posted: Thu Sep 18, 2008 11:23 pm

For those of you that are familiar with 3D Stereograms, here's one made out of simple text. The first such I've seen: if you can't see the APPLE, ask someone who is familiar with Stereograms for help if you don't know how to see them. if you look at the text below and squint your eyes (ie look through your monitor) you will see an apple in 3 D, you can copy and paste this text into another document and it will also work, this is a text only stereogram. I put the CODE bb code on the text just to keep it lined up. It works quite well here on Eater.

Code:

ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3

ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLESDrGApLESDDrGApLESDDrGApLESDD
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGALES3DrGALES33DrGALES33DrGALES33D
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrApLES3DrApLLES3DrApLLES3DrApLLES3D
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGpLEES3rGpLEES3rrGpLEES3rrGpLEES3rrGpLEES3r
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGALESS3rGALESSS3rGALESSS3rGALESSS3rGALESSS3
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApES3DrGAApES3DrGAApES3DrGAApES3DrGAApES3D
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGALES3DrGALES3DrGALES3DrGGALES3DrGGALES3DrGGALES3DrG
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrApLES3DrApLES3DrApLES3DrApLEES3DrApLEES3DrApLEES3DrA
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DGApLES3DGApLES3DGApLES3DGApLES3DDGApLES3DDGApLES3DDGA
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3rGApLES3rGApLES3rGApLES3rGApLES3rGGApLES3rGGApLES3rGGA
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3rGApLES3rGApLES3rGApLES3rGApLES3rGGApLES3rGGApLES3rGGA
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3rGApLES3rGApLES3rGApLES3rGApLES3rGGApLES3rGGApLES3rGGA
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DGApLES3DGApLES3DGApLES3DGApLES3DDGApLES3DDGApLES3DDGA
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGpLES3DrGpLES3DrGpLES3DrGpLESS3DrGpLESS3DrGpLESS3DrG
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLE3DrGApLE3DrGApLE3DrGApLLE3DrGApLLE3DrGApLLE3DrG
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3rGApLES33rGpLES33rGGpLES33rGGpLES33rGGpLES33r
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3
ApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3DrGApLES3

*** BANNED *** Joined: 18 Jul 2004 Posts: 2049

Rover wrote:

. . . if you can't see the APPLE

Damn - can't quite see it Phil . . . eyes must be too old. But I can see Russia from my front porch Thumbs up

And here's a tragic story -

Quote:

A Pacific Cruise goes all wrong, the ship sinks, and there are only three survivors: Bob, Tom and
Debbie.

They manage to swim to a small island and they live there for a couple of years doing what’s
natural for men and women to do.

After several years of casual sex all the time, Debbie felt absolutely horrible about what she was
doing.

Finally, she decided that having sex with Bob and Tom was so immoral and bad that she killed
herself.

This was tragic, but Bob and Tom managed to get through it. After awhile, Bob and Tom’s resistance
to Nature’s urgings waned and the inevitable happened.

Well, a couple of years went by, and Bob and Tom began to feel absolutely terrible about what they
were doing.

So, they buried Debbie.

Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2008 4:42 pm

Nuff sead

Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2008 9:25 pm

Rover wrote:

if you can't see the APPLE,

I'm pretty familiar with stereograms and see the apple.
But, it seems line 11 and 15 are wrong, they don't match the rest of the 3D picture. Anyway this is nonetheless quite impressive Smile

Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2008 10:10 pm

WHAT! ^^^ never seen an apple before? Laughing

From our monthly newspaper circulation 300, told you big city here Wink

Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.

42.8 % of all statistics are made up on the spot

99% of all lawyers give the rest a bad name.

Light travels faster than sound, that's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Okay then, what's the speed of dark?

Remember, half the people you know are below average

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory

Why do psychics have to ask your name?

Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2008 2:42 am

Comic Relief - Catherine Tate & David Tennant

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WxB1gB6K-2A

Posted: Tue Sep 30, 2008 6:42 pm

Pun Intended

1. The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
18. It's not that the woman did not know how to juggle, she just didn't have the balls to do it.
19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
20. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
21. A backward poet writes inverse.
22. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
23. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
24. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!

Posted: Wed Oct 01, 2008 12:33 pm

Big People Words

A group of kindergartners were trying to become accustomed to the
first grade. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher
insisted on no baby talk.

"You need to use 'big people' words," she'd always remind them.
She asked Chris what he had done over the weekend. "I went to visit
my Nana."

"No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use big people words!"
She then asked Mitchell what he had done. "I took a ride on a
choo-choo."

She said, "No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. Use big people words."
She then asked little Johnny what he had done. "I read a book," he replied.

"That's WONDERFUL!" the teacher said. "What book did you read?"
Little Johnny thought about it, then puffed out his little chest with great
pride and said, "Winnie the Shit."

Laughing

Posted: Wed Oct 01, 2008 2:01 pm

4 men were having a reunion game of golf; they haven't seen each other in 10 years. Just as they are about to tee off one man gets called back to the clubhouse for a phone call so his friends tell stories about their sons to pass the time.
The first guy says:
“Well you remember my young Jonny and how good he was with the maths in school? He went on to become an accountant for a top finance firm and worked his way up so fast he now has his own company worth hundreds of millions of pounds. Business is going so well for him just recently he gave away a large part of his business as a gift to a friend.”
So the second guy tells about his son:
“Ah sure you remember my Franky and how crazy he was about the cars? Well he started selling cars a few years back and learned the trade so fast he’s now the main Ferrari dealer in the country; Business is going so well that recently he gave away a top of the range model to a friend as a present. Worth a half a million pounds at least.”

So now the third guy tells his story:
“Remember my young Danny? Well he was always working with his hands, well he started a building company a few years ago and now he’s one of the biggest contractors in the country, building houses for the rich and famous in the bests parts of the country, business is going so well for him he recently gave away a brand new house worth hundreds of thousands of pounds as a gift to a friend.”
So they continue chatting away about how happy they are with their successful sons and how they will all be when their sons settle down and start families when the guy who got the phone call comes back. They briefly bring him up to speed with the conversation and ask how his son is getting on to which he replies:
“Well, it turns out my young lad is one of these queers”
His three friends start to snigger,
“And he works in one of these gay bars…
His friends are having a hard time trying not to laugh
….As a dancer”
Now his friends can’t contain themselves and start laughing
“Me and his mother are not too happy about it but things can’t be that bad for him, his last 3 boyfriends gave him a house a car and a share in a company worth hundreds of thousands of pounds!”

Posted: Wed Oct 01, 2008 5:28 pm

Hackers steal computers over Internet!!

Quote:

we're pretty sure that, once at their final destination, they're stripped down, resprayed and sold on the black market as 'new' computers.

*** BANNED *** Joined: 18 Jul 2004 Posts: 2049

Ran across this sticker site - hilarious stuff - lots of fun to just explore. Also has many other items like t-shirts and such. Give it a quick look Laughing

http://www.stickergiant.com/

Here are some random samples:

Trophy Videos · Posted: Thu Oct 02, 2008 9:34 pm

A guy goes to see his doctor...

Guy: Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me!
Doctor: Sure, I'll help you. But you have to do one thing first.
Guy: Yeah? What's that?
Doctor: You have to stop masturbating.
Guy: Why do I have to do THAT??
Doctor: So I can examine you.

Posted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 3:41 am

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