Do Lads like laptops ? - "God will areest you" !!

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Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 12:58 pm

I got it from here

http://www.screamingbee.com/product/download.aspx

I may even consider the paid version but the free version is fine for changing my male voice to female, as I can't hold a falsetto for very long.

You have to fiddle with your sound settings a little, but I'm not a tech head and it wasn't hard.

If you get it set up and use it, I recommend that you switch it so you can't hear yourself as there is a time delay that puts you off - but again that switch is on the main control panel and no problem.

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 6:18 pm

I've phoned George and sent him two e-mails but he seems to want to cofirm Linda with an incoming call, so I have left the answerphone message of her deceased husband on the line.

I suppose I could fix up the system to handle non skype calls but I am not going to allow George to have me running around for him. I am trying to download a 'best of George's answerphone messages' compilation, and his interruptions aren't helping me - here he goes again. Evil or Very Mad

and I picked up the phone and again it rings. Shocked

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 7:28 pm

Gomer, you sound like a munchkin! hehehe Laughing

Nice software find.

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 8:26 pm

The munchkin echo of the mugu's voice is eerie. I wonder if he picked it up? Would it frighten a superstitious mugu to hear Satan repeating his words (via a man-on-man voice morph)?

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 8:32 pm

BINGO !!!

Quote:

Hello Linda,

I have Heard you see if you want to send me anything now you can as well calll me on my phone first +23470330XXXXX and i will give you my name and address were you will ship this pc laptop to so that i can help you .

if not i am niot going to suffer my self on this anymore i am only trying yo help you and i am not going to wast money on this again because your husband have made me lose some money for transport after that i cannot find what he told me he send.

please call me

That Garth was always a bastard Laughing

. It's a good thing his wife is different - OOOps - no she isn't - she's me too.

The pain - the joy. Laughing

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 8:40 pm

Our (Nigerian) sysadmin tells me the cab fare between downtown Lagos and Murtala Muhammed Airport ranges between US$10-$40, depending on direction and your negotiation skills. Twisted Evil

He's going to feel like an impoverished ping-pong ball when you're through with him Gomer.

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 8:48 pm

I think that his internet cafe is close to the airport judging by the speed he managed to get there. I knew it was short because he was calling from the cafe, in the taxi and from the airport. I could even hear the jets going overhead as he was travelling there.

Do they do a weekly airport pass - a sort of frequent stool pigeon pass. Very Happy

What was the name of that cartoon dog that always sounded so miserable ? - that's how George sounds. I'll send him an e-mail tonight and tell him I'll call tomorrow. I've got to string him along for 8 days until Dan's next radio show.

Ya never know - maybe romance will blossom, and he wouldn't be the first mugu I married either. I married Tutut| below - but it never lasted. Very Happy

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 8:50 pm

Quote:

What was the name of that cartoon dog that always sounded so miserable ?

[Deputy] Droopy Dawg?

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 9:00 pm

That's the one bohigal Very Happy

What blue blooded gal could resist such a dynamic sounding Lad ?

I had an evil idea - as if that's never happened before. Shocked

The Swahili didn't work (but I'll try to get it to work another time - another Lad) and he's unlikely to fall for the transport company again, so I will try something a little different. Very Happy

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 10:33 pm

You can try french, that would absolutely works (as french like puns, but lads seem to be totally hermetic to them !)

EDIT : this bait is great ! Excellent phone calls Wink

Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 11:29 pm

From the sound of the call that software is great. The lad doesn't seem to know whats going on which is a bonus.

Laughing

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 1:07 am

Gomer, this is GREAT. I didn't get to read everything in this thread yet, I just kinda skimmed over it, but once again, you've managed to find a hilarious way to dish out some serious lad pain Twisted Evil

I'm looking forward to having more time tonight to listen to the calls and read more about what you're doing here.

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 11:53 am

No problem - George is a star performer for sure. The only problem is that he is too eager, so I have to keep finding ways to stop him jumping up at me like an eager puppy.

I don't want to go too wild on him just yet. Just gradually waft ideas under his nose and see if anything appeals to him. I sent this just now.

I am considering adding the horror of Linda discovering that her husband died in some awful way - with Mr G0mer as the likely culprit. If I can get George to picture Mr G0mer as some blood crazed psycho, it would be amusing to have him unwittingly meet up with another scammer at the airport, who I trick into playing Mr G0mer.

Quote:

Hello again George

I am having to go to the morgue today to identify my husband's body so this is a very difficult time for me you must understand, but your offer of help is very kind and much appreciated.

I don't know what Garth was mixed up in, especially from the threatening calls I keep getting from this person called Mr G0mer. What do you know about him ?

I have all these laptops pc's and don't know what to do with them. I could give them away to charity or maybe sell them, but I don't know if they have been paid for, or if he has business obligations to settle. I am hoping to get access to Garth's bank accounts next week to see what money he has which will all become my property, and if if there is a large sum there then at least some good has come out of this.

I'll try and give you a call later today, but I don't want to upset myself too much when there is so much to arrange and sort out. If I can dispose of all these laptops it will at least be one less worry on my mind.

If I can borrow a camera I'll send you a photo of the pc's so you can see what there is.

Your sincerely

Linda M0r0ny

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 12:29 pm

This is a selection of George's earlier recordings on my answerphone

This is him doing a Michael Caine impersonation - having trouble remembering his name

helloerrrrmynameisgeorge.mp3 - 0.03MB

George encounters a problem at the airport

georgehasaproblem.mp3 - 0.27MB

George tells me that nobody knows Mr Goat Fluffer

nogoatfluffershere.mp3 - 0.39MB

George sounds desperate - but little does he know that Garth isn't replying because Mr G0mer has bumped him off, but is he saying he's been to the Embassy ? What freakin' Embassy ? Is he baiting himself now ? Shocked

Can someone check this and see what they think ? George does have some overriding desire to go to the USA (can anyone help him ? Very Happy

- I can supply a map for him to walk there ).

didgeorgegototheembassy.mp3 - 0.39MB

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 12:59 pm

This guy seems like a prime candidate for a real road trip. You're wasting his talent by keeping him in his own country. Kid needs to get out and sow some of them wild oats we hear about.

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 2:04 pm

No - I don't think he'll safari for me. he is sceptical and "tired" and low on phone credit, I imagine, after all his calls.

Just in.

Want to pressure me huh ? - let's see how well you can handle a hysterical woman. Let's crank up skype.

Quote:

Hello Madam,

all i have to say about this is i am tierd of it if you want to send the pc laptop then go ahead and send it if you don,t please don,t bother me again i have no time about this i am a very busy man okay.

your husband only call me out for an assittant and i do not know why he keep me waiting hear he want to send this pc to me so that i can help me sell it and have the money for business for him so if you want to send it to me them call me on phone so that i will give you my name and address but if you don,t want to do it then forget it i have no biusiness about the death of your husband or his money or his bank all he needed from me is to help him recieve this pc laptop that all.

bye George

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 4:21 pm

The last call wasn't interesting, but he's really pushing his luck. It's interesting to see him working. When I e-mail he wants a phone call, when I call he wants a mail, then he calls me to verify it, and I don't pick up.

I suspect that he's getting assistance and guidance now, so it's likely he'll want e-mail confirmation of all calls so that his 'mentor' can advise him.

I need to slow him down, but still keep the bait dangling. I'll call and e-mail him but not answer his calls to me. I can always cover that by saying I don't have the password to get into G@rth's phone.

I'll send this and then leave him alone for a day or so to let him wonder whether or not he's lost a golden opportunity.

Quote:

Hello George

I don't know why you are being so horrible to me. All I am asking you to do is to sell some laptops and I believe you did this for my husband before he died. I don't know whether you are scared of Mr Gomer, because if you won't help me I will call him and get him to take care of this matter for me.

It is all quite simple. I send you the goods and after you receive them you send me the money, less your fee for handling them. I may just be a woman but I know how business works. At the moment they are worth nothing to me, so all I want to do is turn them into cash. If you do not know how to do this then I will find someone who can.

I will even work with your associates, but I will need details that I can supply to the shippers. I cannot even get them re-packed and re-addressed ready for shipment until I have this information, so this is going to cause extra delay making everything happen so slowly.

Please take into account that I have to arrange my husband's funeral after the police release his body, so I cannot just jump to every snap of your fingers. I am not your slave and if I have to get someone else to hep me I know how to flutter my eyelids to get a man to do what I want.

It seems you have no knowledge of how to treat a lady. Please send me your detils and a picture of yourself.

Yours sincerely

Linda Morony

Laptop piccies included courtesy of tss1961

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 6:36 pm

It's not looking good. Sad

Quote:

Hello Linda,

Thank you so much and why do you want me to show you my picture i cannot do that did i have your or your husband picture ? answer is no.

HERE IS THE DETAILS YOU NEED FOR SENDING THIS LAPTOP.

NAME... GEORGE H3NSHAW

Address ..NO 24 BEST-FORD AVENUE OKE-AFA ISOLO LAGOS NIGERIA.

MEANWHILE SHIPMENT HAVE TO THROUGH EITHER OF THIS MEANS. DHL OR UPS OR FEDEX IF YOU CANNOT SEND IT TO ANY OF THIS MEANS PLEASE YOU BETTER NOT SEND IT TO ME BECAUSE I WILL NOT GO AND SUFFER MY SELF ON IT SO THIS IS WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO

GEORGE

For that, I've sent him a major slap and told him I can't deal with anyone so disrespectful. I'm not going to allow him to dictate the bait, so I am prepared to risk ending it. He's called my bluff and I've responded - the next move, if any, is his.

If he's taking advice (and I suspect he is) I want him to lose confidence in his adviser. Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 7:01 pm

I love it. LOL_sign

I've cracked George's brain. Laughing

Quote:

HELLO LINDA,
LET ME TELL YOU I DO NOT KNOW WHO YOU ARE YOUCALLED ME ON THE PHONE I CANNOT EVEN HEAR YOU CLEARLY AND YOU ARE TELLING ME YOU ARE A WOMAN I DO NOT EVCEN TRUST YOU ANYMORE I THINK YOU ARE TRYING TO SCAM ME AND LET ME TELL YOU BETTER REPENT IF THIS YOU ARE DOING IS NOT A GENUINE YOU BETTER STOP IT BECAUSE IS NOT GOOD YOU EVEN LIE TO ME THAT YOUR HUSBAND IS DEAD AND IF THAT IS A LIE THEN I ASURE THAT BEEN TODAY 16 OF FEB AND IF YOUR HUSBAND IS ALIVE AND YOU ARE SAYING HE HAVE DIE YOU WILL DIE IN THE NEXT 21 DAYS UNLESS YOU CONFESS TO ME WHAT YOU ARE DOING BUT IF WHAT YOU ARE TELLING ME TRUTH I ASURE YOU SHALL OBTAIN MERCY FROM GOD AND YOU WILL BE BLESSING WITH RICHES AND WISDOM BUT IF IT IS A LIE MARK IT ON YOUR FROM OF COMPUTER WITH RED PEN SO THAT YOU WILL REMMBER WHAT I SAY , IN THE NEXT 21 DAYS YOU WILL BE DEAD UNLESS YOU COMFESS TO ME DO NOT JOKE WITH ME AM A STRONG MAN FROM GOD I TRY TO HELP YOU I DO NOT TRY TO OFFEND YOU BUT SINCE YOU HAVE MADE ME LOOSE MY MONEY AT AIR PORT AND LIE TO ME YOU WILL BE FOUND DEATH LIKE YOU SAY YOUR HUSBAND IS DEAD,

THANK YOU

BEST REGARDS
GEORGE

I guess that's the most long winded death threat I've ever received, and I've had a few.

It's not over yet Very Happy

and he'll be nicely primed for Dan in 8 days. A bit of teasing over his taxi rides should send him ballistic. Laughing

I think he likes me. Very Happy

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 7:42 pm

Quote:

BUT SINCE YOU HAVE MADE ME LOOSE MY MONEY AT AIR PORT AND LIE TO ME YOU WILL BE FOUND DEATH LIKE YOU SAY YOUR HUSBAND IS DEAD,

THANK YOU

BEST REGARDS
GEORGE

An angry lad alright, but polite to the last Laughing

Great work as ever Thumbs up

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 10:04 pm

Good job, Gomer! That was really fun. I'm starting to get the impression that "Mr. Gomer" will be as feared as the unmentionable one within the next year or so. I hope so at least. Smile

Posted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 10:12 pm

Quote:

IF IT IS A LIE MARK IT ON YOUR FROM OF COMPUTER WITH RED PEN

So when an important email comes along, these guys highlight it on their monitor with red pens?

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 9:33 am

@Gomer - Funny death threat. I like how he kept repeating the 21 day time. Linda must be really scared, now! She's never been cursed like this before!! hehehe Laughing

I think she better call him and make him take the curse off of her, but of course, never confess to scamming!!

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 11:26 am

Why not wait his 21 days(mildly slapping him around the whole time) and then say "See, I was telling the truth cause I'm not dead" Then really slap him for not believing you.

Wouldn't that really put him in line with your ideas/manipulation?

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 11:27 am

Bloody aol - I was forced to take a connectivity improvement download yesterday and guess what - I ended up with no connectivity at all. Evil or Very Mad

Speaking to their helpline Shocked

. I consider myself a techno dummy but thir helpline, who probably call themselves computer techno wizards of world domination, were as dumb as my toenail.

Dumbass me appears to have solved the fault in their bleedin' software download, though I haven't cooled down.

Now it wants me to load a security update - does it ever end ?

Hopefully I will manage to continue this bait in spite of aol.

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