The fifth annual Eater Valentine thread

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Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 10:14 pm

And you aren't irishemigrant are you? You never stood a chance in any case.

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 10:16 pm

OK, PRS, it's time to tell you about my latest business venture
http://www.hotelchocolat.co.uk

And if this doesn't work I may have to try honesty Shocked

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 10:33 pm

We don't fight, we just fill you up with poiteen, then bludgeon you over the head with a shileleagh

Sometimes we let you live, just to give us something to do on Sunday after Mass

But since Corona accepted me, I've given up foolish ways, and now get my pleasure from being in a car with a 427 fully worked motor and a hot chick driving with her foot to the floor

Corona rocks!~

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 10:35 pm

Am I to understand that you just went after Corona while under the influence? You don't really love her like I do.

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 10:46 pm

Ouch! Weasy, you cut me to the quick! Hahahah!

I guess "Ook ook, ook!" passes for poetry these days....

Well, monkeys and weasels, its a free world! Maybe I should look for someone, more, human.

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 11:03 pm

Rodus, if you win my heart we would spend the night together here.

Rodus wrote:

OK, PRS, it's time to tell you about my latest business venture http://www.hotelchocolat.co.uk

Dang, the pictures of the couple on the main page are definitely hot. Whew.

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 11:05 pm

Corona this is a truly heartfelt Valentine. I want to win you back NON-violently, so I decided that instead of winning you over with lame attempts at getting you drunk to get in bed, I went and crafted this from my own hands:

Much more beautiful and symbolic than a couple of two-bit beers. Also say hello to my new avatar. surely this is a sign that I am willing to change for you?

BTW, thats one HELL of a Photoshop job. And thats what a REAL corona looks like. An object of beauty. Just like you.

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 11:07 pm

@PRS, I got just the stuff

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 11:19 pm

Just to clarify Jojo's post, I have not asked Lotta to be my Valentine! I simply stated that Lotta is my mentor, my keeper, and my risky-free master. That has nothing to do with what month it is... it's just a small matter of absolute submission!

PRS is the only Girly Girl I have asked, and if she declines my genuine offer I will accept defeat like a man. I will also try to drown my sorrows in a case or two of Molson Canadian, start fires at random and maybe even turn gay (since PRS is the only one for me), but those are all very manly things I think.

Gentlemen, I have a proposition. Since men of stature like us are above petty mud-slinging (and since I suck at photo-chopping), I vote we settle it in the way of our glorious rockin' forefathers. A real live, no-holds-barred gittar showdown. If you accept, we will have it out 6-string to 6-string to win the heart of sweet PRS. While whammy-whacking, sweep-picking, electronic FX, hammer-tapping and detuning are allowed, I think we should ban such practices as round-the-world, flaming leather boots, feedback-looping and excessive dwigglies! I will also agree not to use the patent-pending mind-trick on anyone. As a gentleman, I have already laid down my best available performance in a previous post. Good luck, may divorce be with you, and as my educated colleague says...

jojobean wrote:

Obi- may the best man win.

Thank you. I certainly will try. Wink

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 11:28 pm

Gentlemen............so much fighting over the ladies Rolling Eyes

I've noticed not one request to dbest03 who I hear is really very very cute. Very Happy

@Doctor Stephan...you may want to take a look at her avatar, if you like furry creatures..

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 11:31 pm

Lotta, I am willing to go to any lengths to capture and secure Corona's heart as mine as I have offered to do for her.

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 11:55 pm

Wonders why her Bawls doesn't give her any chocolates and roses? But sleeping together in the back of his rusted Pinto was fun! Laughing

Posted: Mon Feb 11, 2008 11:58 pm

YW, Are you romantic?

Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:11 am

Yes. Of course I am romantic. How can I show my dear?

Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:18 am

Never trust a midget corona.

Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:25 am

Mini Me is the midget you clown.

Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:32 am

YW, I have never had a man to ask me that before and I really don't know what to say.

Elite Baiter Joined: 17 Sep 2004 Posts: 1269

thefife wrote:

^^ I am but if you come w/ the avatar, I can work w/ that. I can adapt. Let's just be friends ok, it's your avatar that really strikes my fancy.

Edit to add: You go ahead & take Reaper, I will keep Capt. Jack occupied Laughing

Nope, sorry fife, Capt Jack stays with me. Twisted Evil

Maybe I'll take Reaper AND the pirate. But then I see this...

Reaper wrote:

It's ok Persie, my offshore Swiss bank account will cater to your needs. And it's leaning towards a yes for Special. Wink

If you're reading this Special go back a few pages for you presents..and you to Bella.

Sorry Reapie, I was at work. You asked Persie, Bella, and me? Ex is off chasing Corona, and you're asking other gals... Confused

I'm still indecisive...

Elite Baiter Joined: 11 Jul 2007 Posts: 1979

I guess there's no Valentine hopes for a poor and raggedy old bag lady. Sad

Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:33 am

Well Corona, I aim to please. And why? Because I am not happy unless you are first.

Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:36 am

^^Show me how you make a woman happy! Wink

Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:37 am

Chibuike wrote:

Wonders why her Bawls doesn't give her any chocolates and roses? But sleeping together in the back of his rusted Pinto was fun! Laughing

Have you looked next to the bed lately? And yes,the Pinto was fun. Wait till you see where we are goin' Thursday night! rasslin' is comin' to the arena, and I got us'ns front row seats. We will be close enough that when the rasslers hit each other, the spit will fly on us! Then on to the Waffle House for a late night breakfast...........I can hardly wait!

Edit: I almost forgot! I bought you a Sears AM/FM woodgrain clock-radio with snooze alarm for next to the bed to replace your AIWA stereo system.

Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:40 am

corona wrote:

^^Show me how you make a woman happy! Wink

I thought that there was a policy here on Eater about posting photos like that?

Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 12:45 am

^^

Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 1:14 am

Harry Bawls wrote:

[We will be close enough that when the rasslers hit each other, the spit will fly on us!

Uh...ya...I gotta say that any date that involves massive amounts of saliva being spewed out on me by strangers is a good one. I don't know about you guys, but spit spewing always gets ME in the mood for romance! Rolling Eyes

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