SmartFeedSmartFeed          

Porsche Hangout


WELCOME - YOU ARE CURRENTLY VIEWING 419EATER AS A GUEST

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

ScamWarners.com - Internet Anti-Fraud Center - now open!


 Woo-Hoo - another visit to the doctor...

View next topic
View previous topic
 
Post new topicReply to topic
Author Message
Reprob8
DIGITALIS MAXIMUS


Joined: 20 Sep 2004
Posts: 1794
Location: At the Pharmacy


PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 5:03 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I haven't had a complete physical in quite awhile so I went for one yesterday. As is usually the case with my doctor visits, weirdness ensued...

1) They gave me a questionairre to fill out 2 weeks ago, naturally, I quickly filled it out in the parking lot before the appt. One of the questions was "Do you have 5 or more sexual partners?" I thought it read "Have you had more than 5 sexual partners?" I answered Yes. The doctor and his med student(female) gave me a strange glance when they read my answer and the doctor said "I guess the male equipment is functioning ok, huh stud?" I was confused - we cleared it up.

2) I haven't had the time/desire to have my right shoulder surgery I've needed for 2-3 years so it pops out of joint at least twice a week and I painfully pop it back in - It really grosses my co-workers out - the sound is amazing. The med student is checking my mobility by twisting and turning my limbs and she accidently popped the right shoulder out of socket. It was great, I acted as if it had never happened before and pretended to be in agony. I thought the med student was going to faint. That's when my doctor said "Cut it out, funny man, you're not fooling me, pop it back in". The med student got her revenge later.

3) So they go for the dreaded prostate check - glove, lube, insert fist(or so it feels like). The doctor did this portion and then the medical student gets her revenge by saying she really needs the practice and needs to check it also so I got not one but two different hands in my butt.

4) Off to the treadmill I go, because I'm bigfoot's cousin, they have trouble making the little wire thingies stick to the hair on my chest, I think they finally used super-glue because it hurt like hell when the med student pulled them off, taking the hair with it - now I have a bald polka-dot pattern on my chest.

5) The doctor gave me a kit to send a stool sample - my reply "screw this kit doc, after what you just subjected me to, I'm just going to crap in an envelope and mail it to you"

So, my heart is good, my lungs are clear(quit smoking 5 mo ago), my blood pressure was 101/74, I've lost 25 lbs - still another 15 to go to reach my fighting weight - haven't got the results of the blood test yet.
The med student left the room and my doctor thanked me for allowing a student to participate and being a good sport. I said "Dr. S, if you were really grateful, you'd write me a script for vicodin for no reason whatsoever". SHE DID!!

So I rush to the pharmacy to get the script filled and the girl who filled the script said "What cologne are you wearing, it really smells nice on you?" I said "I really don't know, something my kid gave me for Christmas, I guess". When I got to the car, I realized I had put absolutely no cologne on that day and the pharmacist was probably smelling the lube the doctor uses for the prostate check Laughing. I wonder if I sould buy a tube and use it as an after shave balm?

_________________
Boycott Shampoo..Demand REAL Poo
I LOVE THIS CLIP !

starstarstarstar

Last edited by Reprob8 on Fri Jan 25, 2008 4:23 pm; edited 1 time in total
View user's profileSend private message
lokie
Master Baiter


Joined: 30 Jun 2006
Posts: 123
Location: teh interweb


PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 5:14 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Vicodin and Lube.... now I come to it theres just some things the human mind shouldn't think about Laughing

_________________
As always good luck with your bait.


Click here to support 419Eater.com
View user's profileSend private message
The Man
Baiting Guru


Joined: 11 Apr 2007
Posts: 2885
Location: La La Land


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 12:07 am Reply with quoteBack to top

8:

I love every single one of your posts. You owe me a new keyboard.

_________________
---
The Man

YOU ARE A CHILD OF SATAN WITH YOUR HUNGRY DIRTY BODY ,TUNDER FIRE YOU BIG HEAD IDIOT !!! HA HA HA HA HA

IS THIS HOW YOU DECIDED TO TREAT US AFTER ALL WE WENT THROUGH?YOU MADE US TRAVELLED TO ABUJA AND INDEBTED US.

"Cursed is your mother that gave birth to a family-disgrace like you. Cursed is your father he could not control his lust for anything under skate"

"hey u crakhead motherf*cking nitwit, from the way u express the cockamamy sh*t that ur dumb brain is made up of it's so obvious that u never really made it past elementary school but anywayz dogs don't have to go to school afterall."

Pith Helmet (Lagos to Abuja)
Netherlands China Canada x2 United Kingdom Spain Ivory Coast Germany

Hello Kitty! <---in lieu of a brownie. TS
Mortar x8
View user's profileSend private message
Ima Baeder
419Eater Admin


Joined: 03 May 2007
Posts: 18314


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 12:10 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Truly entertaining. Thanks for sharing.

_________________
348 Fake Sites killed United StatesUnited KingdomUnited NationsMaltaNigeriaGhanaBeninGermanySouth AfricaRussiaTogoMalaysiaEuropean UnionJapanIvory CoastSpainFranceSwitzerlandChinaCanadaItalyThailand

Star Mugu Reseller Mortar Closed lad accounts x 100 Sand Timer 2 Years Pretty Rose Mc Fry Mc Fry Nurse Nastys Audi TT Goat Flying Monkey Easter Egg 2011
View user's profileSend private message
Connie L. Gus
Moderator


Joined: 07 Oct 2005
Posts: 6451
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 1:20 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Its all too funny. As soon as I saw your post, I checked the date to make sure it was not a necro and then went to get coffee so I could have a good spew. The best part was the bit about the girl in the pharmacy. You know she is using only industrial strength lube. She's come to associate good times with the smell. In your honor I may go in for a check up 13 days post bike crash and ask for some Vicodin. I've completely depleted my supply.

_________________
Mortar x8 Purple Flower Easter Egg
LISTEN TO ME WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR ONE OF THOSE CHEAP CROOK OR WHAT -tobi donito
Closed lad accounts-a few, United Nations
LISTEN I CAN NOT TAKE YOUR SHIT ANY LONGER WE HAVE WHROTE A PETITION AGAINST YOU TO THE FBI WITH ALL OUR EVIDENCE YOU ARE INTO PROSTITUTION,DRUG DEALING, FORGERY, CREDIT CARDS FORGRY WESTEN UNION FALSIFICATION,DRUGING MEN,COMMETING MURDER, STEALING, DRUNCARD, ALL THIS WE HAVE THE EVIDENCE TO PROOF OUR CASE AGAINST YOU.-Johnson Hill
SafariI am not finding it any funny...Henry A., Lagos, Nigeria to Cotonou, Benin, WIMPed
Safari I am stranderd. Henry A. Lagos to Accra, WIMPed for 67 days.
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate
View user's profileSend private message
RoyalFlush
Eater U Quiz winner


Joined: 30 Dec 2007
Posts: 362
Location: One poker tourney or another


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 1:27 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Vicodin's old news, y'all.

Hydrocodone's where it's at. Mmm. Yeah. Smile

_________________
Cellphone x4

It's you and your family that don't have ENOUGH BRIAN CELLS.

I am dying because of your love you,ve impacted in me.

pony
View user's profileSend private message
Cachuma
Baiting Guru


Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 2284
Location: Blowing bubbles at 130 fsw


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 1:32 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Image

That is one of the funniest posts I have ever read! Thanks for my guffaw of the week!

By the way, Reprob8, your real name wouldn't happen to be Dave Barry, would it??

_________________
Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas [email protected]: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
pony pony Safari = Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
Closed lad accounts x15 Malaysia X1 United Kingdom X1

Hello Kitty! <---TS certified.
View user's profileSend private message
leeuwen
Master Baiter


Joined: 23 Dec 2007
Posts: 126


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 1:54 am Reply with quoteBack to top

A great read, especially the part about the arm socket..that med student must have gotten a few extra gray hairs because of that. Laughing

Your med student reminds me of one I encountered a while ago. I managed to cut myself with a knife at 2 AM..so I needed to go to the ER.
After I got stitched I needed a Tetanus shot. As she was about to put the needle in she said "This is gonna hurt" then started to laugh incontrolably.
Needless to say I felt really comfortable after that Rolling Eyes

_________________
"I appreciate the fact my dear that you are helping me, but you are not a zombie, if not i would not have needed your help."

"IM STILL SLEEPING IN STREET WITH HEAVY CILD HERE AND I CONTACT YOU THROUGH NET
FROM THE MONEY I BEG FROM ETHIOPIA EOPLE FROM STREET. PLEASE IM WEAK AND TIRES OF LIVING WITH OUT HELP. "
View user's profileSend private message
Corona
Eater's sweetheart


Joined: 21 Sep 2006
Posts: 8644
Location: On ya left!


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 2:12 am Reply with quoteBack to top

At least you were warned about the butt check. Very Happy

Try it without the warning. Shocked Mad

_________________
Pretty Rose Pretty Rose Pretty Rose pony pony pony Nurse Nastys Audi TT Nurse Nastys Audi TT Nurse Nastys Audi TT GoatGoatGoatEaster EggEaster 2015Mc Fry Mc Fry
Mortarx? Closed lad accountsx? Pith Helmet
Free Pastor Frank
An Eater's Sweetheart Safari
View user's profileSend private message
justjay
Baiting Guru


Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 2412
Location: ~Data Miner & Esoteric Trivia Collecter~


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 2:21 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I sure would hate to be in medical field in your area when you have a problem! Smile
or store clerk, or any other type of service field Wink

Although, you certainly have a knack for getting members here to spend money on computer maintenance and equipment Laughing

_________________
Dubitando ad veritatem pervenimus
aa419.org member
Site Killing Mortar x uncounted numbers
Mugu Resellerpyramid Closed lad accountsAustraliaUnited StatesUnited KingdomNetherlandsSwitzerlandGhanaBelgiumChinaNigeriaSpain
Ivory CoastCanadaBurkina FasoSenegalHong KongSouth AfricaEuropean UnionBahamas, TheBeninMalaysiaGermanyItalyTogo|¿?|
Over 1000 - no longer counting since sometime in 2008 + #unknown# assists
WDPRs >150 Netcraft>115
----
pony pony pony - just because...
View user's profileSend private message
Nelsonsbattle
419Eater is my life


Joined: 16 Jun 2004
Posts: 433
Location: New Zealand


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 8:48 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Reprob8 wrote:
"Have you had more than 5 sexual partners?" I answered Yes.


That probably covers the eyes on your avatar Reprob8. Now the ears are probably the result of one of them lovers holding her liquor.

_________________
This is quite unfortanate you have basterdise every thing we have been working for a long time.
the photo you send to me ..... i am have six with you in dreem here� Lad after he got a topless photo of my baiting character.
"I have just came out from the bank with the most humiliation of my life." Dissapointed Lad after a trip to the MG agency.
"tell you die, fuck you,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ooooooo" Samull the scammer on being burned
Safari (Samull's trip from Cotonou, Benin, to Lagos, Nigeria, to meet the lovely Steffy)
Mortar x3
View user's profileSend private message
drew.p.coque
419Eater is my life


Joined: 04 May 2005
Posts: 383
Location: front, and low. lower!


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 9:16 am Reply with quoteBack to top

hey 8,

glad your still enjoying doctors.

i work with a load, (they`re always trying to diagnose everything.)

enjoy the vic and lube.

_________________
*this deal is like a straw to a drowning man -chuck solodu
*Call me on my direct line so that we can talk for batter understanding-Aziz
*bank valued at USD 11.5M, left in account number:$286-41732-55
*THANKS FOR PLAYING WITH MY TIME, PLEASE KINDLY FORGET ABOUT THIS TRANSACTION
*you have to tell any one you are here . everything has to be confidential -kevina
View user's profileSend private message
justicebdone
Master of Master Baiters


Joined: 10 Oct 2005
Posts: 679
Location: Beaming Up


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 2:57 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Thanks for the laugh, this is the second thread in a row that has made me laugh out loud at the coffee shop I'm at. If I see the owner go to the phone I am going to make a run for it before the transport van shows up to take me away.

_________________
Son of a b**** don't you give me some s*** like you don't have 7000.00, what about the money you realized from missile you ba****** sold to the Iranians? Nathan "The Potty Mouth" Hitman

F****** d*** motherf***** if you really sent the f****** money why don't you send the f****** control number at once cos I don't really have the time to f*** around with you anymore....you messed up my own Chritsmas too. Nathan "The Potty Mouth" Hitman

If you dont know you are now the Company Police. The Annoyed Check Lad

BACK the ATTACK
View user's profileSend private message
JMRazor
Baiting Guru


Joined: 03 Mar 2006
Posts: 7103
Location: Yes


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 3:12 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I can't believe you let the prostate exam go by without the classic Fletch quote: "You using the whole fist there, doc?"

Well done as usual Repro! Laughing

_________________
<a href="http://forum.419eater.com/forum/donate.php">|A 100% RISKY FREE PROPOSITION| </a> |PLEASE VISIT SCAMWARNERS| |READ OUR F.A.Q.| |WHEN IN DOUBT CLICK ON THIS|

____________________________ pony Pretty Prancing Pink Pony Master pony _____________________________

Tattoo Tattoo Tattoo
Pith Helmet Pith Helmet Pith Helmet Pith Helmet Easter Egg 2013
Closed lad accounts x 43
Mortar x 16
Sand Timer x 3
View user's profileSend private messageSend e-mail
Hekate
Elite Baiter


Joined: 08 Aug 2005
Posts: 1338
Location: Scotland, UK


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 6:30 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

You'd think by now I would know not to read one of Reprob8's medical posts while eating, but no, I just carry on shovelling food into my mouth - and I am now cleaning it out of the keyboard! Rice is a bastard to get out from between the keys btw! Glad you're fighting fit tho, m8! Laughing

_________________
'suck meee son of a bitches fucking retard peoples' M C phonelad

We have on our programms according to the lay down rules to pay the Asians mostly the indians and malasians now and after that it may change. Rev. James Ucheomma

do you really think that i am just a stupid man like you,listen for the veru last time if i did'nt see XXXX after 24 hours you will heat your self.. [love scammer Chucks]

IT'S NOT I LOOKING FOR WORK.GOD FORBID.I CAN BE IN AN OCEAN AND WASH MY HEAD WITH MY SPIT. THANKS AND GOD BLESS.
MARK DOUGLAS.

United Kingdom France 2 x Netherlands
Cellphone
Safari See SP's Irish Safari!
Mortar x14
Golden Pith



Click here to support 419Eater.com
View user's profileSend private message
SlapHappy
Baiting Guru


Joined: 15 May 2006
Posts: 9612
Location: Floating up and down with happiness.


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 7:59 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Funny story, Reprob8! Laughing
Something similar, but not quite as funny as R'8 happened to me last week, when i was getting some blood drawn. I was telling a story to the nurse who was in the middle of filling 3 or 4 vials. "My sister gave me a shot in my rear, just after she just graduated from nursing school. Unfortunately, as she was giving it, I teased her about how weird it was sticking your brother in the ass with a needle, and she broke out laughing.
She dropped the syringe, and it was hanging down against my cheek. Well, it only hurt abit, but it was so funny, that I started cracking up, and moving around, and she couldn't grab it for a few moments." Well, when the nurse heard this story, she dropped the syringe or moved it, and blood started gushing out of my arm and dripping down the arm of the chair. I told her, "I guess I shouldn't have told you that story, huh?" hehehe Laughing

_________________
Sand Timer x Reven U., Fats Walla, Donny
Safari x10 Sand Timer X2 MM:Mikex2, JohnK, [email protected], Ob1, Armstrong, Ismail, TG&Friend
Safari x3 Nancy, Security Guy, Robert Accra-Tamale
Safari Safari Sand Timer (19 mo.) Tina and Joe's Safari - Accra to Niger & Timbucktu
Safari Safari [email protected] & Charlie -Wulugu Or Bust Safari- Lagos to Paga & Tokwari X2 - 3800mi.
Golden Pith x3 H3ctor & [email protected] - Yankar1 & Parakou
Safari x2 Charles and Friend-Amsterdam to Vatican
Safari Issac to Chad
Be A Cool Cat, Like Me Trophy Videos Cool Stuff
pony pony Closed lad accounts Mortar Goat Easter Egg 2011
View user's profileSend private messageSkype Name
music man
Moderator


Joined: 22 Sep 2005
Posts: 13438
Location: East Harlemshire , yo!


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 8:36 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Another classic Rep post!!

The only thing missing was someone to piss you off big style!

Nice one dude!! Very Happy

_________________
Switzerland x2 Netherlands x2 Filipino flag United States x104 United Kingdom x213 Portugal x4 Spain x20 Belgium x4 Canada Hong Kong Italy x2 x1 France x2 Russia x2 Luxembourg Australia x2 Sweden x2 Czech Republic x2 Mortar x13

You will rot in jail.watch your back- any shadow could be mine ! YOU ARE VERY EASY TO TRACK IN YOU NEIGHBOURHOOD ! DRUNKARD AND A SCUMBAG LIKE YOU!
mike lawrence (cheque scammer)

Go fuck your dead parents asshole!!!How can a deaf fool make clean money..The money that you have will never be spent on anything reasonable.
So fuck off..dont reply me again until the cops get your stinking ass...
Lyord Melson- cheque scammer
$4.002million and £214K in fake cheques taken out of circulation. (updated May 2009)
View user's profileSend private messageSkype Name
419weasel
The great and powerful Princess Mooshka


Joined: 26 Jan 2006
Posts: 4191
Location: Somewhere in a hole. Waiting.


PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 11:47 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

clapping Good one with the shoulder check.. Laughing
Imagine what would have happened if you had said "mmm grrowr" when the intern did the butt check.

_________________
GO GRRL BAITERS!!
Where there's a Weasel, there's a way.
Never trust a Weasel bearing gifts.

Click for lad pain. - New to the forum? Introduce yourself HERE!
Easter Egg 2012 pony Turns that frown upside down- TS
Mc Fry
<-- Official 419Eater buns awarded by Luther Blissett, bun-enabler extraordinaire.
Pith Helmet Remy D1ckson - 1,000 miles from Abidjan, Cote D'Ivoire to Lagos, Nigeria and back!

Lad Quotes
http://members.419eater.com/~419weasel/ladquotes.html
View user's profileSend private messageSkype Name
Display posts from previous:      
Post new topicReply to topic


 Jump to:   



View next topic
View previous topic
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum



E-Mail Header Analysis


All Content © 2003 - 419Eater.com
Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2002 phpBB Group :S5: FI Theme :: All times are GMT