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 She's got unicorns!

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ChainYanker
Collecting TShirts the Hard Way


Joined: 02 Dec 2007
Posts: 1497
Location: Shouting "Fire!" in crowded theaters across America


PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 7:47 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

My pet-scammer is an amazing woman.

She was selling dogs, the usual set up. I told her I was into exotic pets, and asked her if perhaps she had any unicorns.

And you know what? She did! What an amazing coincidence!

Quote:
yes i have the unicorn,so What type of unicorn, will you like to adopt just let me know?


I couldn't decide between my three favorite breeds, so I asked her for advice. (I was hoping she'd choose the Invisible Pink type, but that will have to be for another bait).

Quote:
how are you doing today? hope you are Great. Yes i will like you to go for the right breed which is Siameses ok because Siameses will be so much easy for you and gentle for you to ride Like this one i want to Sell for you.
She has no name yet and she is fully breed. She still is still very much available for new home.She is 8 weeks old . She is AKC/NKC/FCI registered and her shots are given up to date,she is excellent in potty trianed and good in temparement .
All her papers will accompany her , I am in West Africa, Nigeria due to my new marriage with my husband and we are meant to be living with each other henceforth. we have her right here with us,And I hope you are also a good Unicorn lover that will take very good care of our unicorn.we are going to ship her to you via American Airline or Delta Airline on sameday or next day delivery after shipment through a shipping agent,I am giving her out for $300 together with shipping and handling.
The lovely Unicorn will come along with all her necessary health paper work like; Akc/Nkc/Fci Registered Paper.
Two Years Health Guarantee,
Health Insurance Paper,
Vet Record,Birth Certicate,
Shot Book,
Tavel Crate,
Toys And Foods.
I will accept payment via Credit card, Western union or Money gram. If you are really interested in having my Unicorn as part of your family. I want you to get back to me with the full name, address phone number including the nearest airport to you where you will want the baby to be deliver to.
Thanks.


So now I'm waiting for my certificate from the Unicorn Fancier's Association. I wonder what she'll do when I ask her for a picture...

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Inspector Gadget
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 7:57 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
you will want the baby to be deliver to

a baby unicorn no less.
Would that make it a unicornette?

hmm, do you get a wafer with it?
(English joke)

A piccy is a must, you need to check that it's colour doesn't clash with your curtains

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rumbero
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:16 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

It sounds like our old friend "Goat" is back in action:

Can you post his addy and let the forum have some fun. Laughing

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GomerPyle
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:24 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Quote:
she is excellent in potty trianed


I'd like to see that - or maybe not, but isn't it time it used a proper loo ? Very Happy

I think you should go for the rarer two horned unicorn - but then you'd just end up with a standard Lad goat I guess. Make sure you get a certificate of virginity. You know what Lads are like. Very Happy

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B. A. Ware
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:50 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Dumbass scammer wrote:
She is AKC/NKC/FCI registered


Unicorns are dogs?? I didn't know this. I always assumed they were equine.
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ChainYanker
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:50 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^Rumbero- No idea who Goat is. The Ladette is calling herself "Vict0ria Sm1th".

I wonder if she's related to Atuku Alli Laughing

_________________
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FEMALE

"This deal does not have anything to do with religion because we are talking about $10.150 million us dollars" -Bangu Mali

"YOUR DEATH IS AT HAND HENCE YOU LEARNT HOW TO DOUBLE CROSS OTHER GUYMAN KEEP IT ON AND WATCH OUT" -Don Jack

"why is it that you dont believed that the unicorn is avaialabe" -Victoria Smith

"i have seen that you are not financially capable to handle this great opportunity maturedly" -Muhammad Bla1se

Earned a pony, earned a bun, still not sure what they mean --> pony

Last edited by ChainYanker on Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:53 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Jedi_Night
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:50 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Ask her if she has any flying rendieer like Rudolph, or any highly intelligent bears like Yogi Bear. Very Happy

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Eliza_Doolittle
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:56 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I do hope that she can guarantee that it will be a tri-horned one in it's old age.

And you may want to find out if its wings have been clipped and if it's nails have been clipped, too. Can't have a unicorn that scratches.

Maybe find out if its dew claws were removed and if you are going to have breeding rights or if you have to ensure that the unicorn is spayed/neutered.

And you need to find out what those registration fees are since it has 3 registrations. My parents just got a dog that is registered 3 ways, and the dog's real registration cost about $100. So I'm sure you will need to know those fees. I'd also ask for the email addy of the person in charge of each of those registration clubs - so you can make sure you can find out all about the steps you are going to need to get it properly registered.

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BRUIN
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:02 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Does she have any pretty pink prancing ponies?

Bruin

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Jayhawk
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:05 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

ChainYanker, GOAT is a lad that showed up awhile back selling exotic animals, and like your lad he had EVERYTHING! I bought me a shark for $600. When I asked how it was going to be delivered he told me it would be sent in a special UPS sharkproof box.

It sounds like your lad is son-of-goat.

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Eliza_Doolittle
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:06 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

yeah - goat was so funny. I had posted the post that ended up going for many pages with what people ordered from goat. I forgot all about him - - so if you search my username and the keyword goat - you can find that post.

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vLad's ebay auction states "Wonderful seller! Thinks "out of the box" to get item to you."
<br>
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MrMe
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:09 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I would ask him what the going price is for an apocalypse pony - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGGLENEEVYc

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I am almost having a bad sight as a result of click on the box

my eyes are paining me now cos i have been
looking at the computer for more than six hours

you cannot subject me to this suffering

i am sick and tired of this shit.

I don't go with this Idea at all, this is not how business is done

whenever i make mistake even at the peak of retrieving the numbers i would ask to go back to the begining and this has virtually consumed all my time by doing this

i cant stress my self any more..I now have a back pain cos of this

pony
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SlapHappy
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:10 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Post his email! Post his email! hehehe Very Happy
I want another pick pony!

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viereinsneun
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 10:18 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Dumbass scammer wrote:
She is AKC/NKC/FCI registered


Fdration Cynologique Internationale registration? Well maybe, if it was adopted by dogs and raised in a Kennel.

Nice to see that the American Kennel Club and National Kennel Club are now also running franchises in Western Africa.

You have to get those pictures, ChainYanker.
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ParaNoid
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 10:52 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

SlapHappy wrote:
I want another pick pony!
Shocked

Is a pick pony like a pick nose? Or a stuffed up nose... Laughing


Sorry mate, not that I never make typos... Cool



EDIT for my own typo... Very Happy

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manbiteslion
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 11:07 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Ooohhh what colour to go for? Spectrum Unicorns usually attract a premium as you have to get a CITES accredited vet to certify them, doncha know.
Failing that, you may be able to get one in infra-red, but they're a bit more aetheric and prone to respiratory diseases so get it checked out before parting with your cash!
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SlapHappy
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:01 am Reply with quoteBack to top

^^ I knew that my typo would bring you into the light, Paranoid. It was a supersecret hypnotic suggestion, that only your brain was programmed to respond to. Now on to the remaining part of my devilish plan.... Smile

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ParaNoid
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 2:58 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I am at your command...

I am listening...

I will request a PPPP for you from the appropriate authorities... Shocked Laughing Cool

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Obi-Wan Knievel
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:35 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Gomer wrote:
Make sure you get a certificate of virginity. You know what Lads are like.
That's just redundant now isn't it? Of COURSE the unicorn will be a vargin. Unicorns and vargins are the exact same thing: Just fragments of someone's imagination!
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rootuser
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:38 am Reply with quoteBack to top

She can get a lot of things, including Critters, Manbearpigs and Polar bears...

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MattNW
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:42 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Was "Goat" the lad that was selling one eyed trouser snakes? I laughed myself silly over that.

@Chain Yanker

Ask if they have any unicorns that are tame and trained to lay their head in your lap. If you want to know why see this:

http://www.whiterosesgarden.com/Unicorns/UNI_other_myths/UNI_virgin_unicorn.htm

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The Man
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 12:44 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Come on post his e-mail.... I want to buy a spider pig!

Unicorns are great though. A picture would be a good idea though so you can make sure you know what you are getting.

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packman
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:14 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Next time you email them see if they have any burmes laughing wallaby's
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SlapHappy
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 2:44 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

@ChainYanker - The Man and I have requested the fool's email address.
Are you ignoring us? Do our requests fall on deaf ears? Do we have to have the Mods release the devil hounds? hehehe Laughing

_________________
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Golden Pith x3 H3ctor & C@leb - Yankar1 & Parakou
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Jayhawk
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 3:49 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

^^^ Don't do it Chainyanker! They just want to buy your unicorns out from underneath you! I think that's how I lost my great white shark. And I had salt added to my swimming pool and everything.

_________________
Mortar x8 Nurse Nastys Audi TTNurse Nastys Audi TT Whip Jack BootGoat Goat < slacking?
just checked the site for update now, shipment smurfs in Porto Novo. Yes!! - Stanley
i will not share my smurfs with anybody again - Stanley (again)
Yes pets are allowed as far as you will occupy the apartment alone, you can release the Kraken.

i will kill you even if it take me to go to jail i will do that because i hate you with all my life....
assisin killer to Feathers McGraw
PLEASE I BEG YOU TO LET ME KNOW THAT PIGGIES OF YOURS PLEASE... assisin killer to Feathers again
YOU PEOPLE HAS DESTROY MY LIFE... Mr. Humphere, lottery scammer
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