Teach Your Lad To Speak English Real Good

By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

Baiting Guru Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Posts: 3193

Since much of the other language stuff is babel-fished, a message that starts using the wrong homophonic English words will turn to even worse babble when it gets translated. So the other readers still get a laugh.

Posted: Fri Dec 28, 2007 5:02 pm

Now I'm trying to find a way to use "gluteus maximus"- does anyone know any long, difficult words that mean "kiss"?

Posted: Fri Dec 28, 2007 5:19 pm

Exosculate

\Ex*os"cu*late\, v. t. [L. exosculatus, p. p. of exosculari to kiss. See Osculate.] To kiss; especially, to kiss repeatedly or fondly. [Obs.]
hope that helps Wink

A good tool for word look ups that I've used often is the reverse dictionary
http://www.onelook.com/reverse-dictionary.shtml

Will

Posted: Fri Dec 28, 2007 5:43 pm

Thanks mil! Yes, indeed, some lucky lad is going to be told to exosculate my gluteus maximus in the near future...

Baiting Guru Joined: 17 Sep 2006 Posts: 5905

Does anyone else spend so much time reading and responding to 419 Emails that they find themselves writing Emails to their friends in the same sort of broken English? I have to stop myself from offering my friends 'compliment of the season' every time I mail them.

Posted: Sat Dec 29, 2007 11:15 pm

I wrote:

Thanks mil! Yes, indeed, some lucky lad is going to be told to exosculate my gluteus maximus in the near future...

Ok, I actually wrote "pucker up to me gluteus maximus". The mugu in question an't keep track of which gender he/she is supposed to be, I'm sure s/he'll overlook a small detail like that.

Posted: Sat Dec 29, 2007 11:26 pm

The following link is worth having a look through
Be warned NSFW....text wise that is Wink

http://www.insultmonger.com/generators/index.htm
NSFW _ NAKED IMAGES

Mod Edit: NSFW warning made more prominent. [BB]

419Eater is my life Joined: 23 Apr 2007 Posts: 377

As well as the grampatical errers dont forget that whatever they right doesnt sound imputent unless it is written in at least 3 different colours, one of witch must be red and embolded

I dont take anything my lads write seriously unless it is in red and the font is at least five times larger than the one I write to them in.

Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2007 6:17 am

I've had some luck with re-educating mugus on the Queen's Tongue (I just like that phrase), but not much. But if suggestions are still welcome here are a few:

INCONTINENCE: An inland shipping term. The act of a parcel crossing national borders within the same continent. A fee often applies for this.

INTRAUTERINE DISCHARGE: Legal approval for a parcel to be released into the custody of an outside delivery company.

BONDAGE: The simple act of bonding an individual or company. Also the practice of keeping something in a bonded warehouse.

FEMDOMINANT: A reverent or respectful term of address for a lady.

HYPOCHONDRIASIS: A debilitating medical condition.

BLACKSHARK: A successful lawyer with an impeccable record.

REGURGITATION: A state of glee or extreme happiness.

Sure laugh if you will, but my wife went to Zellers (picture Wal-Mart without a paid greeter at the door) and asked a guy in their automotive department where she could find SAE 5w30 oil. He brought her a can of WD40 and said that was the closest thing he could find. And HE was probably born here!

Not quite a Newb Joined: 31 Mar 2007 Posts: 79

Just a few moments ago, I sent an e-mail to a lad whom I'm just starting to bait. I told him the following:

"People who know me are willing to bear witness to my excellent reputation and halitosis."

When he introduces a barrister (as I'm sure he will do, I've baited him before from a different addy), I'll make sure to ask about the barrister's halitosis. (We want to be sure that the barrister is going to tell me bull, the whole bull, and nothing but bull!)

Posted: Mon Dec 31, 2007 8:21 am

Every chance I get, I tell a lad that he sounds like a very "impotent" man. They always appreciate this. Laughing

Posted: Mon Dec 31, 2007 4:49 pm

This reminds me of a bit of comedy I heard on the BBC World Service ages ago - I forgot the name of the programme. In George Mikes' style foreigners were given the advice to shake hands with every passenger on an underground train, etc. etc. And they invented a new word for a pint of lager, which was henceforth to be called 'peorse'. Which would result in foreigners entering a pub shouting 'a peorse!'.

I guess <a href = "http://orangecow.org/pythonet/sketches/hungry.htm"> Monty Python's Hungarian Phrasebook sketch </a> may be inspiring, too.

Teach Your Lad To Speak English Real Good	View next topic View previous topic