Hitman Thread: Feel free to mass-bait our assassins!

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Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 1:14 am

^^ I actually had something like that in mind with my character 1m4s0n. I already told him about my military background. So far I didn't get any reply. Maybe he needs a reminder that he's contacted the wrong person. Wink

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 3:48 am

Emails in from both hitmen

first from Dama

Quote:

am STILL WAITING FOR THEM TO COMPLY OK,BUT AS FOR THAT AUSTRALIA MUGU SHE IS SO HARD TO CONVENICE.

THAT YAHCT I SENT HIM THE PICTURE BUT HE STLL DON'T CARE ABOUT WHAT IO SENT HIM.

I AM STILL WAITING FOR YOU TO WRITE ME OK. TO BE FRANK WITH YOU AM HONEST WORKING WITH YOU AS PARTNER OK,

I TOLD YOU I NEED MONEY TO WORK IN CAFE SINCE YOU COUSIN STAB US.
I DON'T KNOW IF YOU CAN SEND ME 200USD JUST TO KEEP BODY AND SOUL.

NOTE:YOU THROW JOBS TO MUGU APART FROM TREAT CASES.SO THAT I WILL AS YOU TO GIVE ME C-PANEL TO WORK OK.
GET BACK TO ME.

Then from N4than

Quote:

Hey Johny,

Thanks for getting back to me and giving that scumbag email again.

The bastard is proving a bit difficult to extract some dough from, he said he doesn't have the money I asked him and funnily he bought a shut gun to protect his daughter. lol

He said he'll be going to Washington DC for some conference and that's why he took his daughter to her mom. What again do you think one can do to make this guy pay, he seems to be adamant but I've asked him to tell me how much he can come upwith for now.

Get back to me and God bless.

Nathan.

No reply sent to either from me yet, JBD if you want to send your reply feel free you have the info required just mention that there are more mugus coming, I will put rootusers addies in the mix later tonight.

Arthur, or Yastreb, the offer stands if you want to have a go at playing partner as well, email addy for my charactor and password can be supplied upon request

Master Baiter Joined: 03 Jul 2007 Posts: 158

Quote:

No new mail! Want to read updates from your favorite sites? Try Google Reader

Aww man

He doesnt want to pour acid on me Crying or Very sad

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 8:41 am

I just offered Cl1ffy this:

Quote:

I just this last hour or so found out you're not Brett. So who the fuck are you and why are you threatening me?

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 10:22 am

Murry Guru wrote:

I TOLD YOU I NEED MONEY TO WORK IN CAFE SINCE YOU COUSIN STAB US.

That must be the reason for completely ignoring my "Ahm3d" Sad

Never mind, victim T4pr0bane will be glad to send him his 3000 Euro on Friday :

Quote:

If you PROMISE never to contact me again I can send my assistant, who does not know for whom the money is intended, to the bank on Friday at noon. His name is Mr. Bxxx Rxxx.

Please, two more days time!

Yours, T4pr0b4ne Dul0phyl4x

I hope this will settle everything Smile

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 2:15 pm

How is this for siggy material?

Quote:

I have your fucking balls in my hand now and the harder I squeez the hurter it's gonna be before I kill you

Quote:

Son of a bitch don't you give me some shit like you don't have 7000.00, what about the money you realized from missile you bastards sold to the Iranians?

I think Nathan is upset with me Wink

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 2:33 pm

@Murry- Thanks for the offer. I don't think I could pull off a partnership convincingly enough, though.

R@y sent this to Cliffy last night:

Quote:

Dipsh*t,

I just got back to Atlanta. The trip to Boston was not very fruitful. I only got $600 from an accountant. I intercepted the Parcel Direct dispatch radio and showed up on his doorstep before they did. All he had was $600 and an address where to send it. He said it was important to get it there by Monday. I don't do things small like that so I held him at gunpoint and got his wife and kids in the van. I told him to come up with $50,000 to keep me from killing his family, but after two days with his damn wife and kids, I figured if I killed them that I would be doing this guy a favor. I even used Parcel Direct to send the bodies back to him. Ironic, isn't it?

Anyway, he gave me an address to an orphanage to send the money. I guess they won't be having a great Christmas. Besides, what kind of Christmas would $600 buy?

Keep in touch, Goat F****r! Maybe someday you will be a big man like me!

I hope I get an evil email this afternoon!

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 3:03 pm

I think N4th4n is intimidated by 1m4s0n's mail. I still didn't get another reply.
Even after sending this to remind him of me:

Quote:

Hey buddy,
I just finished cleaning my guns and all the other stuff and had to think about you.

Do you really think I'm intimidated when some guy from half way around the world send me crap like you did?
Let me tell you something, I have been in Iraq for two times, I have been in Afghanistan and a couple of other places. My father fought in WWIII and my grandfather in WWII!

Actually I'm starting to think somebody set you up on me to get rid of you. Maybe somebody who still owes you money told you something like "Hey Nathan, you just kill that one more guy for me, then it's payday.". But that guy probably knew that you won't stand a chance.

But I'm a sportsman, so I want to wish you happy hunting. I'll see you, but I don't think you'll see me...

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 8:14 pm

Cl1ffy's back!

Quote:

Look here lady, I am not treatening you, I will get my assignment done by killing you if you don't accept my terms and conditions. I won't waste much time to get you earased from this earth so do the rightful thing and get me some cash to save your life or you die.
Get back to me...

El1za's not to be too cowed:

Quote:

You're not threatening me? Holy Odin, you talk about using acid on my face and then killing me, and you say that's not threatening me? What fucking universe do you come from?
So what do you want?

More to come - I hope...

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 10:31 pm

Cl1ffy is busy here too. He has sent R@y not an evil email, but a suck-up email. Ladies and Gentlemen, please put down your coffee before you read Cl1ffy's last line:

Quote:

lol you have way with words, I think I love your ways and actions you normally takes whenever you are a mission... $600 will do alot for me if only you can be kind enough to avail it to me, I think we should work together so I can become a big man like you. Do you think it is ideal calling me names like Dpshit? Laughing

Thanks for keeping me posted.

Get back to me...

Since it is Christmas and all, Ray may be sending some cash his way. Via Parcel Direct, of course! Also, from now on, all correspondance will be addressed to "Dipshit"!

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 11:38 pm

^^ A beautiful epithet, Arthur!
Mail from T4p to C0le:

Quote:

I guess you are deeply satisfied with what you have done to me, you human bullshit!!
I can be happy if no one notices me having taken away 3000 euros from the cash register
I hate you!
my brother Brian is going to send you the money on Friday
I am home in my bed
I can�t work no more this year
I hate you!!!

I just hope this is enough. I can�t sleep for FEAR Laughing

Even Dr. Schl�t3r got mad a little:

Quote:

Ha! You ugly coward!
I just knew that constant police custody around my house and the hospital would make you hide in the bush like a dirty worm! Scum like you belongs to be trampled to mud unter the feet of a herd of horny hippopotamus�!! I cannot tell you how much I despise human scum like you. Go to hell! Rot to hell!
My daughter has been sent to holiday far away where you can never find her!
I KNEW you are too much of a coward to ever get back to me with your impertinent demands for money!
SCUM!
CRIMINAL!
YOU EAT SH1T AND STAY WHERE YOU BELONG TO, IN AN HOT HELLHOLE, YOU DIRTY NO-GOODER!
DISGRACE THAT COME OUT OFF YOUR MOTHER�S LAP!
Yours sincerely, Dr. J0h4nnes 5chl�73r, Berlin-Neuk�lln

Somehow I was just in the mood for that Rolling Eyes

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 3:00 am

^^^It helps to get it out, Frumpy.

Seems R@y is in the giving spirit. He plans on sending the $600 minus the cost of airfare for a one way ticket from Boston to Atlanta and the fee for P@rc3l D1r3ct's delivery service. Here's his email to Cl1ffy:

Quote:

Dipsh*t,

I am feeling a little guilty about what I did in Boston. So I don't want this blood money on my hands. Give me your address and I'll send it to you.

See, ya, Goat F*****r!

I was surprised that he was offended by the term "Dipsh*t" and not the term "Goat F****r".

Meanwhile, Put3y, has been given a huge settlement check from P@rc3l D1r3ct in lieu of him suing them. Also his insurance company has been by to give him burial expenses and have told him about the life insurance he will collect:

Quote:

Sir,

You may have darkened my door by your actions, but I just want you to know that there is a silver lining behind all of this. I just received a settlement check with P@rc3l D1r3ct. It appears they did not want me to sue them. I am now holding in my hands a check for $550,000. Also, my insurance company has given me a check for burial expenses. They have also told me that I will be receiving a total of $400,000.

I have decided that since nothing is here for me, I will be selling my house and pursuing my dreams to become a lion tamer. I already have the hat and will be traveling to Africa to begin a new life.

So, you see, sir, you may have tried to dampen my spirits, but I will be fine, eventually. But, even with all of my money, I will miss my family deeply and I hope you rot in hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wonder if he can help Putey find lions?

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 3:35 am

I'm really disappointed by N4th4n. It seems he's afraid of 1m4s0n. Still no reply.
And I didn't even mention yet that I have served under Major Headache and General Hospital...

Edit: Let's see if he'll react to counter-threats...

Edit 2: Anybody knows if he has family? Car? ... Any info would be really cool... Twisted Evil

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 6:57 am

I got this from N4than recently

Quote:

Hey Buddy,

It seems the sucker is ready to play ball but he said he can only afford $2200 so incase he pays, how do I get your own share of the money across to you?

Hit me up back as soon as you get this so I can know where to send your own money to incase he pays.

Nathan

I sent him this,

Root expect some threats soon,

Quote:

Hi Nathan,

i am glad the mugu is starting to realise we mean business, for someone who works where he does he is dumb but i am glad that he is paying up.

as for my share send it by western union of course, i will give you full details when required, i move arround a bit following different mugus and i prefer to wait until the last minute to give details.

seeing as though you have done so well i have a new mugu for you'

3ric C4rtm4n should be the most suitable mugu i have now
His email-address is [email protected] and he lives in, little mountain-town of South Park, Colorado. he is a unsuccesful movie-producer but he has a Pontiac Firebird, he should have some money in the bank.
He has no wife or kids, but has new toto all the time.

This is from my bisiness partner in US, dont worry about him he is doing this as a favour for some work i did for him, the details should be good but if not let me know ok

bye and good luck to you
Johny

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 7:14 am

Thanks. With 3r1c I'll play the coward, or something in that direction.
It seems he's really not interested in 1m4s0n.
Sent him another reminder today, telling him "I know what you did last summer!" and that I'll come for him, but after the holidays...

So, if it gets a bit quiet about N4th4n, then he's probably on the run from my character...

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 2:27 pm

Murry,

Just informed our boy that he will never see a penny of my 2200.00 as I have bills and house payment. I did dangle the laptop offer. I told him I stole 10 company laptops that were sent to the States with me. I wonder where we will go from here.

Paging hitman Arthur . . . It may be just about time for you to visit the UK and kidnap my beautiful little girl if Nathan doesnt go for the laptop story.

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 4:19 pm

Now we're going somewhere.
I thought he's intimidated, but it seems I was wrong. Or the last mail made him really mad:

Quote:

It is so obvious now that you are a complete, bonafide son of a bitch!
I thought you were in the military, you expect me to show up and blow your f* brains off in 72hrs huh, sucker I know you�ll be waiting, it shows that you are just a freaking imbecile who should have a dunce cap on your f* pea size head.

You said you know where I am and what I did in last summer, what did I do in the last summer d*? Listen tell the motherf* you that those information from that he�s an imbecile like you and that all his findings are spurious��..come on motherf* retire from your holiday and come find me�.I promise I will tear your heart out a*.

Turn all this over in your little mind and hope to see your ass go down the hole soon, you ain�t never gonna see me coming sucker!

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 8:37 pm

He's from the muguverse, so he's willing to forgo 60K to disfigure Eliza in favour of her 20K. Go figure...

Quote:

Oh yes,that is exactly what im gonna do to you.This Xmas I WILL do it ok.you gonna use 70.000usd to work on your pretty face model that is surgry.And i ask for 20.000usd go make the payment now or i do it.
get back to me

Should I ask him why he turned down the 60K in favour of my 20K?

And if you think something's missing from his messages... let Eliza explain:

Quote:

Go make the payment now, huh? Well, fuck me if you haven't forgotten something - like how and who to? What the fuck do I do otherwise - leave it in my mailbox, or maybe dump it on the front lawn?

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 8:50 pm

OK...after "Ahm3d" (me) took away the P4rc3l D1rect which was to be divided between "J0hny" (Murry Guru) and D4m4 (himself) in October, it�s time he gets to see some real money, WU fake transfer starts tomorrow, forms taken from Windypop�s always helpful siggy line link (baiting toolkit). It is urgent because Dennis is tipping with his shoes:

Email1:

Quote:

10:16 (11 Stunden)
i need you to go send the money if not your guards are to simple to take them down at once.
get back to me

"Reminder":

Quote:

10:36 (11 Stunden)
I warned you,but you told me that you have some security men in your fucking home iight.this is just the start next im gonna cut off your arms.ok
IF YOU DID NOT PAY THE MONEY ON FRIDAY THEN I WILL VISIT AGAIN.

YOU HAVE THE INFORMATION TO PAY THE MONEY TOMORROW.I WILL GIVE IT TO YOU AGAIN.

LOCATIO:LAGOS NIGERIA
AMMOUNT:3000 EURO
TEXT QUESTION:WHAT YEAR
TEXT ANSWER:2007.

SO,i guess you won't waste my time any longer just let me see that scanned copy of the payment slip ok.you can scan the reciept and send it to this mail box [email protected] if it bounce back as you said before.or better still type every information out ok.i don't want any third party in my dealings with you or else you pay with your life. NO NO NO MISTAKE YOUR LAST CHANCE ON EARTH.

GET BACK TO ME

This is about the longest email D4ma has ever written. Guess he needed an hour for it, basically one nasty threat and the rest is hitman red tape. He has thought of anything. Persistence shall be rewarded! Laughing

He mixed up a thing though because he sent both mails to my millionaire computer sponsor lady, while the second one should have been sent to my brain surgeon whose daughter is also threatened. Quite a messy office there in Lagos.

"No third party"? Murry Guru, interested in some dolla chopping modality? Laughing

Dennis will never forget you.

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 9:36 pm

^^^Well that could be a good idea,

The no third party is to get the money without me knowing anything about it.

how could he even think about ripping me off Laughing

At least N4than is a bit more honest

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 9:45 pm

^^Well, I will need an, ermmm, explanation Wink

Maybe in about 12-18 hours you will have called me and threatened me to blow up my telephone if I do not give you my MTCN - and, alas, you have taken all the money away before he reached the bank! Things like these happen...

"kak shoveler" Joined: 20 Dec 2007 Posts: 243

I am new here. I wasn't aware that a site like this existed. This is just to funny. I think I will fit in well here. If you need another, I would be happy to join however, I might need a little help from you but more than willing to get involved.

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2007 3:08 am

@Justice - R@ym0nd L(uxury) Y@cht at your service. He even has a passport, even though he is a convicted felon! Wink

Cl1ffy didn't bite immediately so R@y dropped the obovios hint:

Quote:

Dipsh*t,

Since you don't want what's left over from the blood money, maybe you could tell me about the orphanage. The lady who runs it is named 0kr1kp@ K1ngsl3y. Do you know her? She is in Laos, Nigeria. Maybe she can have the money. After all this kid, Put3y, was sending it to her when I knocked on his door and took his family. Maybe I will send it to her.

Either Cl1ffy is really stupid not to have made the connection, he has figured that R@y and Put3y are fake, or he has made the connection that R@y is capable of big time violence and big time money and is scared of him. Very Happy

With my luck it is option #2 and I am done with him. Crying or Very sad

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2007 12:52 pm

N4than is a little pissed with me,

The mugus are not being threatened as easily as he would like, nor will he go for the laptops.

Quote:

Buddy,

It's grossly astounding to note that your emails and all the emails of the mugu you gave me is gmail, is that intentional or is it some coincidental shit?

Anyway, the bastard never wants to send the moneyn again and he's giving some shit about some laptops he stole from the company he works and would need my address to send me some.....I never remember asking him for a laptop. I think maybe you guys should try and go back to whereever you train from and let them give you a comprehensive lectures and training on how to act undercover.

I told you from the onset that if you are some security agent trying to track me down, you are only wasting your time, I'm not stupid buddy.....if actually you know the guy is dumb if he should fall mugu for this kind of scam cos of where he works, why did you give me at all to work on in the first place? and now you are giving me another one, why don't you just give me your number whereever you are and let's chatt on the phone?

I don't think I have time for cat and mouse game. Maybe you tell Oliver or whoever is he to relax cos he's handled it so badly and he's not gonna get him anywhere, I don't need his fucking laptops and maybe I should even tell him to send them to you since you guys are close so you send me my money after you might have sold them.

Get back to me buddy!

Any ideas on where to go with him

This just sent to Dama

Quote:

Hi Dama,

I have work on the Australya mugu and i think she will pay if you tell her this,MG L13 MG convertible, red in coulour, the house letter box was blow up yesterday, tomorrow it will be house, if she live she will be burnt and she only be good for modelling as goats ass after that.

I have a new mugu for you as well, this one may be difficult but give it a go, Email: [email protected]

Name: C0l3 Young3r age: 45
Occupation: International shipping consultant / broker
Married: Wifes name C4rol Young3r age: 44
Location: Long Beach California.
Home: High Rise Condo over looking the Port of Long Beach
Dogs: Skye & Faith Small Shelties.
No kids

He work as businessman, my contact in US will give more informations if u need them.ok

By Dama, get back to me about mugus.ok

Johny

May I suggest that somebody actually be a little more compliant with the hitmen at least some of the time. If I keep feeding them crap mugus who dont pay they will stop taking you on.

@JBD, if you could actually pay him and have the dollar chopped it may give me back some credibility again, otherwise he wont be taking any new mugus

Posted: Fri Dec 21, 2007 1:25 pm

Cl1ffy's back with details:

Quote:

Now,i want you to make the payment within 24hours to prevent you face been bath with the ACID.Look here no one toll with me ok.
get back to me with the payment slip scanned.
BENEFICIARY: A ADENIYI
Account Number: 0202/630 950 966
Ssort code: 07-44-56
IBAN: GB77 NAIA 0701 1630 9509 66
BIC: MIDL GB 22.
BANK: NATIONWIDE BANK
ADDRESS: 56, SOUTH STREET ROMFORD, ESSEX. RM1 1UP.

Something for Alan...

Eliza wasn't impressed (which may change):

Quote:

Listen carefully, spermicide breath - this is the festive season. The chances of finding an open bank branch in the next 24 hours are zero, zip, zilch, goose egg, fuck all.

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