Cheese deserves it own thread. Long live cheese!

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Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 2:04 am

Oh Peanut!
As I was reading your post, I was eating a grated cheese sandwich... puke

Split from another thread and made its own topic. TS

Baiting Guru Joined: 31 Jan 2007 Posts: 12237

Quote:

I was eating a grated cheese sandwich

I am across the pond, is that the same as a "grilled cheese sandwich"? In the states we normally eat them with tomato soup.

http://www.hungovergourmet.com/recipes/1998/recipe18.html

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 3:20 am

No, strangely enough, a grated cheese sandwich is where you get some cheese, grate it, then put it in between two slices of bread.
(The cheese can look like maggots...)

Ps : I love cheese on toast with tomato soup Very Happy

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 3:23 am

^^ That's an extraordinarily bizarre way to make a grated cheese sandwich IWM Wink

Baiting Guru Joined: 31 Jan 2007 Posts: 12237

^^^Touch�

I have never heard it called a "grated cheese sandwich" before... I do throw the odd chunk of cheese between 2 slices of bread every now and then (along with a healthy squirt of mustard) Wink

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 6:13 am

@Pastor Frank.

It's my avatar that makes me look pissed off isn't it...

Wink

Baiting Guru Joined: 31 Jan 2007 Posts: 12237

That damn cat looks like my wife when she is pissed off at me. Laughing

Edit: She even has the same hat!

Not quite a Newb Joined: 09 Aug 2007 Posts: 44

@pastor frank

from that recipies page:

Quote:

2 slices Pasteurized Processed Cheese Food Product

you would get hanged when asking for that in france Razz

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 7:40 am

Cheese Thread! Very Happy

OK...
1. Crusty bread (buttered please, not congealed vegetable slurry)
2. Mature Cheddar cheese (1/4 inch thick slabs minding you, not grated? Confused

)
3. Lashings of:

4. Eat, making yummy sounds Wink

Not quite a Newb Joined: 09 Aug 2007 Posts: 44

^^ good idea
webtip
http://www.schaerdinger.at/2728_723_ENG_SCHD_KAESE.htm

no processing only ripening

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 8:19 am

Cheese?? Did I hear cheese?? Ohh....

My ultimate cheese heaven:

Gorgonzola Dolce....nothing better than this on some nice italian bread along with some Prosciutto di Parma...

Please excuse me while I sit in the corner and drool.... Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 31 Jan 2007 Posts: 12237

Sweet Jesus! It's a cheese thread!

(Sorry Don, I didn't start it)

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 9:16 am

A snadwich is a waste of good cheese, you harlots!

Oh, a cheeseboard... mmm.....

Strong mature cheddar, some nice Brie, bit of Stilton, some Port Salut and a soft roulade. Add some nice butter, crusty bread and some biscuits, a few grapes and apple slices.

I know what I'm having tomorrow night now.....

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 1:25 pm

I am reminded of two things:

Original topic - hearken to Monty Python's "Whizzo Quality Assortment".

Quote:

Praline: Next we have number four, 'crunchy frog'.

Milton: Ah, yes.

Praline: Am I right in thinking there's a real frog in here?

Milton: Yes. A little one.

Praline: What sort of frog?

Milton: A dead frog.

Praline: Is it cooked?

Milton: No.

Praline: What, a raw frog?

Milton: We use only the finest baby frogs, dew picked and flown from Iraq, cleansed in finest quality spring water, lightly killed, and then sealed in a succulent Swiss quintuple smooth treble cream milk chocolate envelope and lovingly frosted with glucose.

Praline: That's as maybe, it's still a frog.

Milton: What else?

Praline: Well don't you even take the bones out?

Milton: If we took the bones out it wouldn't be crunchy would it?

Praline: Superintendent Parrot ate one of those.

Parrot: Excuse me a moment. (exits hurriedly)

Milton: It says 'crunchy frog' quite clearly.

Praline: Well, the superintendent thought it was an almond whirl. People won't expect there to be a frog in there. They're bound to think it's some form of mock frog.

Milton: (insulted) Mock frog? We use no artificial preservatives or additives of any kind!

Praline: Nevertheless, I must warn you that in future you should delete the words 'crunchy frog', and replace them with the legend 'crunchy raw unboned real dead frog', if you want to avoid prosecution.

Milton: What about our sales?

Praline: I'm not interested in your sales, I have to protect the general public. Now how about this one. (superintendent enters) It was number five, wasn't it? (superintendent nods) Number five, ram's bladder cup. (exit superintendent) What kind of confection is this?

Milton: We use choicest juicy chunks of fresh Cornish ram's bladder, emptied, steamed, flavoured with sesame seeds whipped into a fondue and garnished with lark's vomit.

Praline: Lark's vomit?

Milton: Correct.

Praline: Well it don't say nothing about that here.

Milton: Oh yes it does, on the bottom of the box, after monosodium glutamate.

Praline: (looking) Well I hardly think this is good enough. I think it would be more appropriate if the box bore a large red label warning lark's vomit.

Milton: Our sales would plummet.

Praline: Well why don't you move into more conventional areas of confectionery, like praline or lime cream; a very popular flavour I'm led to understand. (superintendent enters) I mean look at this one, 'cockroach cluster', (superintendent exits) 'anthrax ripple'. What's this one, 'spring surprise'?

Milton: Ah - now, that's our speciality - covered with darkest creamy chocolate. When you pop it in your mouth steel bolts spring out and plunge straight through-both cheeks.

Praline: Well where's the pleasure in that? If people place a nice chocky in their mouth, they don't want their cheeks pierced. In any case this is an inadequate description of the sweetmeat. I shall have to ask you to accompany me to the station.

And on the subject of cheese... From the animated version of Terry Pratchett's "Soul Music"...

Quote:

The Mayor of Quirm offers The Band With Rocks In some famous Quirm cheese.
Buddy says: 'We're bigger than cheeses!' much to the disgust of the townspeople!

Now, if we could only get the Goons into this somehow...

419Eater Admin Joined: 30 Sep 2003 Posts: 7469

We mustn't forget www.richardcheese.com in such a thread of course Smile

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 2:44 pm

Eating a mature cheese is very much like making love to a beautiful woman...with your mouth full how can you tell her you love her?

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 3:00 pm

@ yastreb : from 'The Last Smoking Seagoon'

Quote:

FX: Cash register bell

BLOODNOK: Oooh, that tune, how it haunts me. It�s my regimental march, the third mounted cash registers. Come in and savour the exhibits, lad, this way please. Now you see, the actual slice of Gorier cheese issued to the fifteenth pamfit division of the battle of Boorada

JIM SPRIGGS: Just a minute, Jim

BLOODNOK: What, what, what?

JIM SPRIGGS: This steaming cheese has got New Zealand stamped on it

BLOODNOK: Yes, it was captured by them during the battle, you see, you can see the bullet hole in it. Oh look out, it�s moving!

FX: Gunshots

BLOODNOK: Come out and fight!

SEAGOON: Don�t shoot! Don�t shoot, Major, it�s me

BLOODNOK: Nicotine-mad Ned, have you been smoking that cheese? Come with your hands up and lay your wrist-watch on this table. That�s right. Good heavens, look at the time! Twenty to four, the perfect time for a wrist-watch robbery

GRAMS: Whoosh

SEAGOON: Oooho, my last worldly possession stolen. My only goat-skin, duck-operated wrist watch, gone!

ECCLES: What�s the duck for?

SEAGOON: To lay eggs. Gone in the direction of away, what can I doooo?

Wannabe Baiter Joined: 05 Jul 2006 Posts: 90

Quote:

"Do I smell home cooking? It's only the river, it's only the river."

David Byrne, The Talking Heads

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 8:27 pm

cheese on toast with crushed dried chillies on for that
heat hit with a few beers.

or smother the cheese when its just starting to bubble(under the grill)with
a thai green/red curry paste.

that does the trick

Wink

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 10:05 pm

OMG - I thought I was the only one old enough to remember the Goons! Spike, Peter & Harry, may they rest in peace. Who can forget Ned Seagoon, Eccles, Bluebottle, Major Bloodnok, Minnie Bannister, Henry Crun, Grytpype-Thynne and Moriarty. My brothers and I used to act out the scenes from a script book that we bought my Dad for Xmas one year. Dad was rolling on the floor and Mum left the room!!!
But I digress - nothing can beat sitting outside the pub on a summer's night with a great big plate of Ploughman's and a cold pint of scrumpy. Yummy! Forget the little tarty bits they add these days - slice of tomato, watercress, and all that crap! Just give me a hunk of crusty bread, a doorstep sized piece of nicely aged cheddar, a big dollop of Branston, a couple of good sized pickled onions and you'll see one very happy camper!!! Damn it - now I'm starving...

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 10:10 pm

Cheese as a medicament!

In Vietnam, 1970: You talk about aged cheddar...vintage WWII; hockey puck-sized cans of what was presumed to be cheddar included in C-rations. Spread on the crackers (tasting like wafers one receives at a Holy Communion) it was actually pretty good...especially with a lovely rice wine sucked right out of the bottle.

This delicacy was named after, and highly-valued for, its function. We called it "Butt Plug in a Can." A guy suffering from a certain condition would actually trade his can of peaches or fruit cocktail for a nice can of Butt Plug.

Posted: Fri Aug 31, 2007 10:50 pm

guymannemisis wrote:

nothing can beat sitting outside the pub on a summer's night with a great big plate of Ploughman's and a cold pint of scrumpy. Yummy!

Didn't we have a thread devoted to Ploughmans recipes a few months back?

You weren't alone GMN in your quest for a no nonsense chunky ploughmans!

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2007 2:24 am

Finally a thread with substance.

even if the substance is a solid food made from the curdled milk of animals like, cows, goats, sheep, reindeer, and water buffalo.

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2007 7:25 am

Pastor Frank wrote:

(Sorry Don, I didn't start it)

No problem with real cheese threads but I refuse to discuss products of the US American or British chemical industry with anyone not Swiss, French, Italian or Dutch. I like my cheese to be actually edible and made from milk.

This is cheese!

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2007 7:36 am

mmm...cheese fondue with either a few glasses of white wine or a tiny bit of kirsh (Cherry Schnapps) (cooked in the fondue, not separately, well for me anyway)

I also like Gruyre, Camembert, and Emmentaler

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