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 Stupid Questions about holes in the lad's script

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Obi-Wan Knievel
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Joined: 10 Dec 2006
Posts: 1486
Location: Bald Knob, NF


PostPosted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 5:21 am Reply with quoteBack to top

We've all seen them: Ridiculous little pieces of nonsensical drivel within the script of the letters from our loving lads. Be it the situation they're claiming to be in, or how they plan to pull this off, there's a passage or word in every one of their letters.

Since I agree with not educating scammers by slapping them for their stupidity, I may never find the answers I want.
Still, it's made me want to ask...
    Question How come diseases never besmirch or even befoul medical treatment... why is it always "defile"?

    Question Why does charity money always have to go to Pakistan and Bulgaria? Why not Bosnia or Detroit?

    Question Why would you want someone who is totally honest to help you commit a crime? Wouldn't a lying scumbag make a much more suitable partner for this sort of thing?

    Question If this guy died without leaving a will, how the hell can I or anyone else stand in as the beneficiary?

    Question You're a banker who's willing to swindle $65,000,000 away from your employer. Why are you suddenly so concerned about keeping your job?

    Question If you've just discovered millions of dollars that absolutely nobody else knows exists in your bank, how did it get there?

    Question If no records were made of this massive deposit, how did you find out all the details of where it came from?

    Question You're an international bank. So if you can't do it, just who the hell will cash a cheque in your country?

What would your questions to the lads be? Or... what would your answers be if you could play mugu-for-a-day? If you've asked questions like these, what was the best / funniest response from a lad?

(Yes, we know the lads are just trying to sell the story. Yes, we know English isn't always their strongest language. No this isn't a dead-serious question. That's why this thread isn't in Main Scambaiting or Hints & Tips.)
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Nurse Nasty
Baiting Guru


Joined: 31 Aug 2005
Posts: 7255
Location: Australia, where a dingo stole my eski


PostPosted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 10:14 am Reply with quoteBack to top

From <[email protected]> Direcktor of Fuds Bank of money - Detroit

blessing to you my trussed up fiend. pleasing to be doing buses with you. understand my pozition.

1. Besmirched Diseases are no where near as green and yukky, and most of them befoul medical treatment. Personally, I think being defiled is fun, but that's just me.

2. Who would believe Bosnia or Detroit have anything of value worth saving?

3. I recommend using a scumbag for all business transactions ... they are also known as lawyers.

4. It's not very hard to play the role of a long lost relative. Oh, the amount of times I've had to dress as a old woman at a will reading... it's the bloomers. I'm wearing them right now.

5. $65,000,000 doesn't stretch like it use too. We all need a fall back.

6. What recently discovered millions?? Quick! Look over there!!!

7. I found out about these funds from my legitimate business partner in Ghana. He also works in a bank, and ... wait a minute ...

8. I may work for an international bank, but the only person who can do that is Bob, and Bob is on lunch right now.

thank you for helping me in this transakshun
may you pleasently be surprised.
Frank Frank
Doctor Professor Mr. President of the CIA of America Bank
Brussels, Canada
90210

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LaBrea
Elite Baiter


Joined: 04 Aug 2007
Posts: 1355
Location: Yet another hotel


PostPosted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 4:19 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

You mean like:
Why doesn't your bank have a domain server for email accounts? (he just likes using his private email: [email protected])

Why won't your bank accept my check on deposit instead of I need to send the payment to somebody at WU? (transaction system must be down)

How is it that you won't accept my job application without phone/address, but 2 days later you tell me I'm hired without me sending those to you? (HR screw-up)

Why do all of your characters have 2 first names as their name- Jeffrey Joseph, Dwight Kevin, etc? (He probably already tried George Bush, Tony Blair, Monty Python- didn't get any replies!)

Regards

LaBrea

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wayne
Account closed at users request


Joined: 05 Dec 2005
Posts: 3630


PostPosted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 5:30 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Why is it that when a "woman" can't afford to pay her hotel bill, the owner takes her passport off her so she can't leave the country, but still lets her stay in the hotel and use the computers in the hope some stranger will send her the money? Wouldn't he be better off making her work her debt off as a dish washer or something?

Also, why is it that beautiful Russian women would rather agree to marry some ugly oik from Stinkwater, Ohio she's only ever emailed a dozen times rather than some dashing, rich man from her own country?

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