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 Almost had to learn the hard way

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thefife
"Mercedes Dealer"


Joined: 13 Apr 2007
Posts: 2261
Location: Soaked in Holy Ghost Fiyah...it tastes like chicken


PostPosted: Wed Jun 27, 2007 1:50 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I've been doing my first church bait for about a month & a half now w/ the best mugu ever P4ast0r R4m35h. I almost seriously f'ed up my favorite bait yesterday. But thankfully I was able to save it WHEW. Very Happy

My mugu jumped the gun & took the site pics b4 I had a chance to send him the sacred symbol that has to be on the banner (I was on vacation in real life). The day I returned he had sent the photos which I posted in the pics forum. I had my main character send him this
Quote:
Dear P4st0r R4m35h,

Happy greetings to you in the holy name of Christ. I hope you are well today. I have kept you in my prayers daily.

Imagine my joy P4st0r R4m35h. After my long journey to be greeted with the preliminary photos of the church site. I am very impressed.

You are promptly scouting out a proper location for the India church and took it upon yourself to make a Thank You banner for Mr. Cub4n. Your real dedication energizes my faith in God's holy messengers. I know Mr. Cub4n will be overjoyed to see the photos of the banner you made for especially for him. God will reward you.

As I promised. I am attaching an image of one of the most sacred symbols of our church. It is the R0s4 Cruc15 C0r0n4 V1t4. It is one of the three Cr0wns of R3v3l4t10n5 and represents eternal protection.

Please follow all instructions. It is very important that I present the photos in the correct format to the board of directors. Please provide. Photographs of the proposed building site including the banner in EACH photograph. Again, the banner must read

Future Site and Construction of
Church of the 0rd3r of the Kr4kh0r3s T3mpl1
T0d0s S0m0s Put0s
Thank You

The R0s4 Cruc15 C0r0n4 V1t4 must be clearly shown on the banner. At least four (4) photos must show the land being cleared of any vegetation and clearly marked with powder white chalk or wooden stakes. Photos should be taken from multiple angles. The board will need to see the entire area of the proposed site before they will approve the site. The only individuals required for these photographs are you and the available church leaders you named on the Faith Grant Application.

As you are aware, this will speed up the donation process. The board's top priority at this very moment is the India expansion project.

I am aware of the condition of your current house of worship. As the first church branch in India, the new building must bear architectural superiority. To reflect the virtue of your mission.

Mr. Cub4n0 is working on the additional donation. There is every reason to believe. Sis. T0psy Kr3tz appears very eager to have the P4n0ch4s P3lud4s S1st3rh00d sponsor and build the computer center.

I will await your response and will continue to pray for you and the success of this project.

Sincerely Yours in Christ,
Rev. Mother Guch33y


Unfortunately against my wishes, he was sending materials to my bs address. Yesterday all 3 letters he sent were returned to him address doesn't exist. For whatever reason he can't figure out how to fax stuff, he's tried faxing at least 8 times but can never get it right. I think he's not hitting send or maybe even forgetting to put the papers in the fax. Laughing so he writes this in response & cc's all of my other characters as per usual
Quote:
Dearest Beloved in the Lord,

Many thanks for your letters. Please let us know your website address.(Or )telephone numbers. I was sent 3 letters by post but it returns to me. In the that letters Address is not found. Please send your telphone numbers and web site address.With out it we can not do any thing.So Please let us know your postal address and web site address. Our church leaders are asking your correct address or telephone numbers.Now Iam Sending Return letters pictures for your notice. Please see attachments.

Thankng you, Yours in Him,
P.R4m35h B4bu

Here are the pics

Image
Image

Ok so here's where I went stupid (I'm blaming it on jetlag lol). I meant to send this to my church bait mentor but hit reply instead of foward
Quote:
* i knew this would happen sooner or later. what to do about the phone situation. i don't want to talk w/ him. i can make up some bull about the address. we are rural, the mother church site is a secret location, whatever...


As soon as I hit send I was like "OH MOTHER* ME". Evil or Very Mad Evil or Very Mad Evil or Very Mad Needless to say I was freaking out a bit. Then my mugu wrote this
Quote:
Ok you have web site? Please let us know. I will to do whatever you ask? But FAX and postal are fail, So our Churh leaders have some douts. Please understand and send your detials.Phone/website/postal correct address.

Thanking you Yours in His Service,
P4st0r. P.R4m3sh B4bu


I calmed down & thought a bit. Obviously he had not caught on for some bizarre reason (probably the same reason he can't figure out how to fax). I had already told him we had to shut down our website b/c we were losing $ to scammers b/c of it. So I decided to go w/ this angle & had the VP of the board write him this
Quote:
Dear P4st0r R4m35h,

Greetings to you in the name of our beloved Saviour and Christ.

I must inform you of a very disturbing occurrence. The church's Security Department discovered today. They have alerted me that Rev. Mother Guch33y's email account has been infiltrated. The security team is currently investigating. I have spoken with the Archbishop 4nt0nio S0pr4n0 IV and we are both in contact with the Security Department. I will keep you informed of the outcome of the investigation. Archbishop S0pr4n0 has mandated security codes for added protection. You will be assigned a security code to use in future emails between you and the church. For added security measures. Please do not respond to ANY emails from Rev. Mother Guch33y 's account until you have been given the security code. When your code has been assigned, I will give it to you it to you.

P4st0r R4m35h, I apologize for the inconvenience. The church has its own internal postal system. The mother church location does not receive mail via regular post. Only full members are permitted to send materials to the mother church. It has come to my attention that you have not been baptized in our faith. This prohibits you from sending letters or other materials to our location.

It appears that when your letters were received our Postal Administration did not investigate further to learn your current project status with the church. I will sort this out with them. I will keep you informed of my efforts.

Pastor, we do not currently have a website. I am not sure if you are aware, but we had to take our website down because the church suffered great financial losses to fraud as a result of the website. The board decided earlier this year to have the site taken down to prevent further victimization. Until more stringent security measures can be implemented, the board will not approve having a website.

You may call or fax us at xxxxxxxxxx. We have another line you can use as well which is xxxxxxxxxx. I know you have had trouble faxing documents to us in the past. I believe the trouble may be on your end because we are able to receive other faxes with out a problem. We can work this issue out later.

Yours in Christ,
Father 3r1c

Then this from the Archbishop to the mugu, the board VP, the bishop & the faith grant list serv
Quote:
Dear Beloved Brothers in Christ,

Calvary greetings in the glory of the Lord. For those of you who do not know me allow me to introduce myself. I am Archbishop 4nt0n10 S0pr4n0 IV, I am the archbishop of the the Mother Church Diocese for the Church of the 0rd3r of the Kr4kh0r35 T3mpl1.

I am sure Father 3r1c has informed you of the security breach that was discovered this morning at the church. Our Security Department's preliminary investigation has revealed that the P3nd3j0 P4g4n Church is responsible for the infiltration of Rev. Mother Guch33y B4gg5' email account. As many of you know, these wicked individuals have been involved in defrauding our holy church in the past.

Please forward ALL emails you have received from Rev. Mother Guch33y's email address in the last 48 hours for analysis by our Security Department. Do not respond to ANY emails from that account until the analysis is complete. All Faith Grant Applicants will be assigned a security code for future communications. It is my hope that this will prevent further security breeches.

When your security code has been assigned, you will be notified. Please include the security code in electronic, phone, and fax communications with the church until further notice.

Please accept my apologies for this occurrence and any inconvenience this may have caused you. Please contact me, Bishop C4rl0s Arell4n0, or Father 3r1c C4rtm4n if you have any further questions. We will do our best to assist you.

May God be with you all now and forever.

Sincerely,
Archbishop 4nt0n10 S0pr4n0 IV
Church of the 0rd3r of the Kr4kh0r35 T3mpl1

Then another one from the board VP
Quote:
Dear P4st0r R4m3sh,

Due to the security breach our email system suffered today, all electronic communications must have your assigned security code in the subject line of each email until further notice. The has been assigned the following alpha numeric security code:

xxx-xxxxxxx

Until further notice, all communications must include the assigned code. If you receive an email from a church official that does not bear the code do not respond to it. Forward the email immediately to Archbishop S0pr4n0 at xxxxxxxxxx and he will investigate the veracity of the email. I tried calling you several times with this information but was unable to get a connection.

I do sincerely apologize. Rest assured that the church takes security matters very seriously. This matter will be handled immediately and referred to the appropriate authorities.

On a positive note. Rev. Mother Guch33y has informed me that she sent you the sacred symbol to place on the banner for the church site photos. I am attaching it again for your reference and in case you did not receive it. The Rev. Mother sends her warm regards to you and your congregation. Please photograph the proposed site from various angles so that the entire site can be seen. Mark off the boundaries of the site with wooden stakes or white chalk. All photos must show the banner. The only people required for the photographs are yourself and the other church leaders. We will need to see as much of the land as possible. The less people in the photos the better. Only enough people to hold the banner.

If you have any further questions about the proper format for the photos, I am happy to answer. We are very eager to proceed with the church construction.

I am also pleased to report that Mr. Cub4n will be meeting with the P4n0ch4s P3lud4s S1st3rh00d on Wednesday to conclude the donation discussions. We anticipate a successful outcome.

Yours in Christ,
Father 3r1c

Then silence. I knew I would have to wait until today to hear form him given that he is 9 hours ahead of me. But I didn't hear from him today so I was depressed all day thinking he started doing something foolish like using his brain & dropped me. crying

So I broke down & called him. We had a nice little chat. Turns out he has not started using his brain at all. He got the emails & understood everything. He said the reason he had not sent the pics today was b/c it was raining heavily but as soon as the rains stop he will do the pics. I hope it's not monsoon season in India. Confused He was all like I love you mother, thank you mother, we are praying for you mother, bless you mother, we are so thankful to God for you, etc. Laughing So it seems everything is still on track. If everything goes well new banner pics will be forthcoming. I will be xtra xtra xtra careful from now on I've learned my lesson. Embarassed

_________________
Mercedes-Benz Safari Invitational Peter S0lomon Pith Helmet Lagos to Calabar Pith Helmet Lagos to Kano via Abuja (w/ OxygenDeprived)

Barr. Johnny Gawa: Hello Baby.
Let hope to make it more real for good. (+2 pics of him rockin his delicate underthings)


Pastor Ramesh:Dear Mother Guch33y B4ggs in christ,
...So we want repair our tached prayer house. If you would like to help us 500 dollars it will be great help...Now I am some pictures for your kind notice. I am waiting for your reply.
Thanking you. Yours in His service (+ Banner!)


Pastor Ramesh: I dont want any luxary life ...Presently I need bicycle. It cost nearly $100 dollars. If you give this it is great need for me.

Mortar 10+ Twisted Evil
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