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 Poetic Lad thread, now with real victim: updated 6/2

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jose_cuervo
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PostPosted: Tue May 22, 2007 2:46 am Reply with quoteBack to top

One line of "sweet nothin's" and six lines of "send the money".

Who says all the good ones are taken? Laughing

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Cachuma
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Joined: 04 May 2007
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Location: Blowing bubbles at 130 fsw


PostPosted: Thu May 24, 2007 7:02 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

This is just the funniest bait I've ever done. I continue to demand that he give me full details on all of his sexual thoughts about me (mind you, this is after he saw that horrid pic!). He continues to express his passion quite eloquently:

Quote:
Hello Love Millie

How are you doing today? I got your email, OOOOOOHH Your email made my day, I tough you would have sent the $5000 by now. But to my surprise you have not yet send it, What is Going on Millie? Hope there is no problem? if no problem go and send the $5000 as soon as possible this morning So that i will pay to the bank and enamble them Process Further.

I will want the plain ticket money to be separated from the $5000 That will be more better ok. Go and send the $5000 as soon as possible, in other for us to start making plans for our self, when i get to you side. I when come to your place, you will have anofe of me, this is just the Beging ok. When i come you will get to know me more better.Tonight I want to make all of your fantasies come true. When I get there. plan to begin my slow seduction. I will make your entire body feel like it's on fire, from your head to your toes. My lips will caress you, my tongue will lavish you and my hands will explore. My ultimate desire is to leave you wanting more. And, just when you think you can't take anymore... Tonight my love, tonight.

I was thinking about you today. I wonder if you know how much I've come to enjoy the time we spend together writing email to each other. The longer you're away, I find the more my arousal for you increases. I wish you have send the $5000 to me to enambel me pay to the bank inother for them to process for your winning cheque and Move on to you there in your place right now, So I could feel your skin next to mine. My body will feels electric when you touch me. It's as if I am on fire. I hope i will be there there soon, So I don't have to go another minute dreaming about your touch.

Honey i am lost, Just send the money as soon as possible ok try and send the money this morning ok. So that we will pay to the bank and let them process for this cheque.

I love you and miss you, Hope to see the Information of how you send the money soon. Honey i am Re-sending the payment information back to you.



In an email a few days ago I told him I'd gone to WU, who had a new "security procedure", and I included this:

Quote:
I hope you like the test question I picked! Okay my darling, I should think you'll have the money very soon, and then I will get my winnings! Will the bank be sending me a check? I can't wait! I'm immediately going to go out and purchase my new fur coat, and the best bottle of champagne I can find. Oh, and I think I might splurge a little bit and buy a few sex toys for us to use. What do you think? Any preferences? I'm thinking I might buy a Rabbit Habit vibrator. That should give us a few hours of excitement!

Waiting in Heat,

Millie


He sent me this:

Quote:
Hello Love Millie

I got your email,

I feel so cool when i look at your pic and i touch my penins,ooooooo but i almost came out hhhh That was so nice.

Its like the western Union Office dont want this to work between us. But i will prove to them that i love you and i can do any thing to make sure we are together .Ok so they want me to fill some information right? Ok send me the website Where i am to fill out my informatiom. I just want us to pay the bank and have some money for my self for the traveling fee that all and come to you and be with you for ever. You see i lost control every day thinking about you Honey lets make this work ok.

Ok send me the website ok. Do that right away.

Regards
Your Darling Joseph


I slapped him for not telling me I was beautiful, and he sent this:

Quote:
How are you doing? I got your email, Why do you always get upset at me, why? You know i love you with all my heart, and i will make sure this dream between me and you come through. Dont be upset at me Honey , You know since i Lost my Wife my life has not be the way it used to be. Sometimes i feel like crying that you go upset at me almost all the time.Dont do that at me ok.

Since you have sent the money through Western Union Money Transfer.Now we can pay to the bank and i can have some money for my Traveling Fee. You will have to send me the following information. which is on that form they gave to you which you have now with you. This is the Information below which you are to send to me:

1.Name of sender..................................
3.Address of sender..................................
2.Amount sent.............................................................
3.Money Transfer Control Number(MTCN)...................
4.Test question and answer if any .............................

So those are the information you are to send to me ok.

Your pic look so nice it seems like you where in your Bed Room when you had the picture. Am i right? With your Nice Top. ooooooo look nice.

As for the left $500 that will be nice for me to get you a nice Gift, So tell me what Kind of Gift you like best? Ok i know what i will get for you, a gife you will never forget in your life.
Honey can you send me another pic of yours again? Send me the Information as soon as possible. to enamble me go to the western Union Office right away.

Love you honey hope to see each other soon.

And hope to see the sending of the money information soon.

Regards
Your Darling Joseph


So I sent him to 1TV5, where he apparently spent several hours answering questions (pretty funny answers too!) to no avail:

Quote:
Hello Love Millie

How are you? i got all this information, I have tried to make sure i get the MTCN Number from the site which you provided to me. But i could not,i am so hangree right now, i have spent alot of time to make sure this works between Us and the western Union are trying to make sure it dose not work.oooooooo anytime i try to process with the site. its gose off in my computer so i am so confused Right Now. What you have to do now you will have to go back to the western Union Money Transfer office and let them know i can get the MTCN Numbers from the website. if possible get your money back from them.

Hope i am Understood.

Regards
Your Darling Joseph


So I sent him this:

Quote:
Oh my Hunka Burnin Love Joseph!

I just got up, and saw your emails. How awful! This is terrible! What is the problem that you are having? The man at the Western Union office said it was a simple procedure! Is there a problem with your computer or something?

I certainly DO still want us to be together, and no I HAVEN'T found a new love! Unless you consider my new little pal Rabbit Habit to be any kind of competition. I went out and bought him yesterday, and the poor little fella is getting quite a workout. I'm afraid I might wear him out before you even get here! But that's okay, because once you're here I won't need any form of fake stimulation, because you will satisfy my every sexual need with your powerful tongue and penis, right?

Listen, I'm going to drive right on down to Western Union and have a talk with them, and tell them that they have GOT to give ME the MTCN number. And as soon as I have it, I'll send it to you so we can get this done. I'm getting a little worried...yesterday you said I only had 4 days left to get my money, so I guess that means today I only have three days, right?

Oh, but before I go down to Western Union, I just have to go have another session with my bunny. I always close my eyes and picture your round bald head between my legs when I'm doing that. I promise it won't take too long.

I'll write you back just as soon as I get back from Western Union with the MTCN number.

I love you with all my heart and all my hot pussy!

Millie


And then I let him cool his heels for a day and a half. He wrote a couple times, wondering what was going on, so last night I sent this:

Quote:
Oh Joseph!

I was coming home from Western Union yesterday and I got into a car accident! I didn't even see the car, it just came out of nowhere and hit me. I was injured -- I got some bad cuts on my face, and a lot of bruises all over my body. I'm so upset about the cuts on my face. I'm afraid that you won't love me anymore when you see my face all cut up. I also knocked out a few front teeth. It will be a while before they can fix them, also it will be very expensive. The plastic surgery I'm going to need for my face will be very expensive too! I'm so relieved that I will soon have my lottery winnings, so I'll be able to afford to make myself beautiful again, because right now it looks like someone took a butcher knife to my face. My darling Joseph, please tell me that you'll still love me even with my face all messed up like this!

After I got in the car accident, they took me in an ambulance to the hospital. The worst part about it is that I also got arrested, because I'd had just little bit of vodka before I left, and I guess the police thought I was drunk. It was very upsetting! I was certainly not drunk! I can drink a lot of vodka and not feel drunk at all, so I can't understand why they arrested me. They said my blood alcohol level was 2.8, which is really not that bad, and certainly not worth throwing me in a jail cell with a bunch of prostitutes!

Anyway, I'm home now. I'll have to go to court in a few days, and I'll probably have to pay a big fine, but at least I'll have my lottery money so it won't matter. And besides, we'll soon be together and that's all that matters

I'm so sorry to worry you. I did talk to the people at Western Union, and they still won't give me the MTCN numbers. They said that you haven't completed the security procedure so they can't verify that you are not a terrorist. Can you believe that? I printed out your picture and showed it to them to prove to them that you couldn't possibly be a terrorist, but they still said that they won't issue the MTCN numbers until the person who will pick up the money passes security. I told them their security website wasn't working, so they said that they have a paper form you can fill out that will take care of it. I have the form here, but I don't have a scanner. My next door neighbor has one, but she's asleep now. I'll go over there tomorrow to scan the form in and email it to you so you can fill it out and send it back to me. Once you do that, and I bring it to them, they promised me they'll give me the MTCN number so you can go get the money. I can't wait for that to happen!

I'm so worried that my time will run out to collect my winnings! Can you please ask the lottery people to extend my time? Explain to them that I was in a car accident, and hopefully they will understand and give me a little more time.

It's getting to be nighttime now and I'm VERY tired, not to mention still a bit hungover. I'm going to have myself a little tipple and go to bed. I promise to dream about making love with you the whole time! I still hunger for your manliness between my legs. I hope I can find my rabbit habit. I probably need new batteries by now.

Until tomorrow,


This morning he sent me this:

Quote:
Hello darling Millie

How are you doing today? When i read you email i cryed alot. oooooooooo What has happen to me Baby. I am very sorry for all that happen to you ok, Even you had a face cult it dosent matter to me. All i know is that i love you.I carry you with me Wherever I may go And think of you always Because I love you so My heart is filled immensely With the pearls of love you drop Soulful words, loving glances Gentle touches, warm advances For all that you do,And all that you are You're my one and only My shining star See, you and I, we fit Just like a warm glove Always and forever, you'll be.

My Dearest Love. Why will you be arristed by the Police, you where not drunk you only too some vodka so in that case the police dont have the right to arrest you, for what? How i wish i was there i would have let them know that its not surpose to be so.

Dont worry honey, I will Inform the Lottery House. That you have some problem Right Now, so they should give you some time, So the dead Line date which they will give to me i will let you know as soon as possible.

But any way just try and send me the Form so that i can fill the form and send to you inother for them to give me the MTCN Numbers. Or Look this is another Ideal if they did not give us the MTCN Numbers. Willdraw your money back from them and let them know that you are not sending money to me anymore. They when you collect nthe money. you will let me know immediately. So in that case i will give you my friend account Number inother for you to transfer the money to me.

Hope that is a Good Ideal? Becaue Looking at this carefully the Westrn Union Office dont want this to work between us. But i belive in my Faith and i also belive in God. This will work between Us ok. I will love you with all My heart. So you look at my ideal and go and collect your Money back from the Western Union Office. and let me know immediately, But if you dont like the Ideal you can still send the form to me Let me fill it.

Regards Yours Joseph.


I replied:

Quote:
Oh my darling Joseph!

I am so happy! I'm so relieved that you replied. I was beginning to think that you only loved me for my beauty, and now that my face is scarred you wouldn't love me anymore.

Okay, I'm attaching the form that Western Union gave me. It seems to ask some strange questions, but the man told me that it is a personality profile to search for people who might think like a terrorist. I know for sure that you don't, so I'm not worried a bit. Please send it back to me as soon as possible!

I'm SO glad that the lottery people are being understanding about this. I'm even more glad that you are being understanding! I knew you wouldn't think I was really drunk.

Now I am again thinking non-stop about what is sure to be a cataclysmic first night together. Even though my face throbs, my pussy throbs even more. Oh oh OH! I want you to touch it, and lick it with your tongue! Now, I want you to tell me all about how you are going to lick me and make me climax all over your face. Please tell me details! I need something to keep me going during this long wait. I wore my poor little bunny out...he vibrates no longer. Other than the time I spent in the hospital and jail, I've spent all my time using my little bunny, thinking about your pink head bobbing between my legs just like my bunny. It's so exciting!

I can't wait to hear back from you!

In throbbing ecstasy,


I love his response...he actually admits he has to go to a cyber cafe! LOL!

Quote:
Hello Honey,

My computer could not download the File, I will go to the Cyber Caffa to print and get back to you ok.


Pls dont get angry, I will get back to you soon. Ok.


Love you honey, Love you till the Last ok.

Regards


I hope you guys are getting as big a kick out of this idiot as I am! If not, I'm going to start worrying about myself...is there something wrong with me??? Laughing

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Poison Ivy
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PostPosted: Thu May 24, 2007 7:10 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Cachuma you are amongst the best!!!!

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BRUIN
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PostPosted: Thu May 24, 2007 7:23 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

So when does the poetry slap happen?

Bruin

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Cachuma
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Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 2284
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PostPosted: Thu May 24, 2007 8:18 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I'm just waiting for the right time! I want to get the forms back first...I sent him the really funny ones, with the ink-spot questions. Hehe! I hope he doesn't twig...

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Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas [email protected]: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
pony pony Safari = Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
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Ima Baeder
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PostPosted: Thu May 24, 2007 9:01 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Laughing

Nice Work Cachuma!!!

I'm so glad that your "face cult" doesn't bother him!!!

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Cachuma
Baiting Guru


Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 2284
Location: Blowing bubbles at 130 fsw


PostPosted: Tue May 29, 2007 4:07 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I know this is sick, but this bait has me laughing so hard my stomach hurts! I know a few of you have been enjoying this, so I thought you might like to see the latest. It only gets sicker -- and funnier!

When last I posted, he'd give up on 1TV5, and I'd sent him some WU forms. He was heading off to the internet cafe to print them. I sent him this:

Quote:
My Darling Joseph,

Well, did you get the form? Did you fill it out yet? I'm so eager to get this deal done, and start our new life together! It's all I can think about. Hurry and send them back to me, so I can take them right down to the Western Union office, and get the MTCN numbers!

My facial cuts are starting to ooze a bit, and they hurt a lot and are kind of runny. I'm having to drink more vodka so they don't hurt so much. I wish you were here to make me feel better. I'm praying that by the time you get here, they will have scabbed over and won't be pussing so much. But I now know that you will love me, even with these seeping sores on my face. And besides, you don't really have to look at them. Just close your eyes and give me deep tongue kisses, and then you can slide on down to the good stuff. I sure didn't get injured there! In fact, I can assure you it's working quite perfectly. I've been testing it out all day. Even though I ended up wearing my little bunny out, I found an old electric toothbrush that is doing the trick now. I just have to remember not to actually brush my teeth with it. I do get a little forgetful sometimes.

Oh, and I want you to know that I wrote a very angry letter to Western Union today, about their security website. I told them that it didn't work properly, and that it has caused me a lot of stress and pain. It's really Western Union's fault that I got in my car accident, because I was only out in my car picking up the form because their website wasn't working! If it had been working, you would have already received the payment, and the money for a plane ticket, and you might already be here, giving my pussy the workout it needs. OH! OH! OH! Just thinking about that, and about your pink bald head, has got me all revved up again. Time to break out the toothbrush. Good night my darling, I can't wait to hear from you!

All my oozing love,

Millie


His response:

Quote:
Hello Honey Millie,

How are you doing today? Hope you are fine? I am so hangree with the Western union Office there in your country. And also Upset! Upset. Look you made a mistake to send the money throught the western Union Office which you used.

I tried to Download the form, from my computer i could not so i have to go to the Cyber caffa close to my Office but could not download it too. I was Upset and i made up my Mind that i will not send you anymore emails. But due to the Love which we have shair together I could not resist It so i have to email you my Love and let you know the Process and stress which i have been going through.That is not how the western Union Office Operate in the World. But my friend consins who stays in USA, Do send some money down through western union to him here in the United Kindom For some project works.

So i am beliveing that you did not send any money. Or tell me do you send at all? But anyway this will be the last ideal which i am to give to you. and this should be final.

1. Go back to the western Union Office and get back the $7000

2.when you get it from them email me immediately. Hope i am Understood honey.

Get back to me as soon as possible.

Regards
Yours Darling Joseph,


I was kinda bummed that he couldn't download the forms. They were in PDF format, and were the really funny ones with inkblots and everything. But he couldn't seem to download them, so I decided to send him the less-funny ones in JPG format, and give him a nice slap while I was at it:

Quote:
Joseph,

I am so pissed off right now I could spit! I can't believe you suggested that I didn't send you the money. I've told you everything I've done every step of the way. I've opened my heart and soul to you, and pledged my body to you, and this is how you repay me?

I sent that form to you in a standard attachment format. Everyone else I know with a computer can download it. What is the problem with your computer? Doesn't your company have decent computers? Why would you have to go to an internet cafe to download it? It is just a regular PDF file, which anyone should be able to download.

I went back to Western Union this morning and got another copy of the form in a diffferent format. I'm attaching it here. You can fill it out and send it to me. Then I will go back to Western Union and get the MTCN numbers.

But I'm telling you right now, you'd better apologize for doubting me. I've been through hell for you. I've been in a car accident, and been arrested, and gotten my face all cut up, and all so that we could start a new life together with my winnings. I've offered to share them with you, and to welcome you into my home and into my bed. I think I deserve a little better than this last email you sent me.

Here is the form. I'll await your response. And your apology.


His response:

Quote:
Hello Honey Millie

How are you doing? I got your email, I am sorry i was so upset about the Attarchment of the form. oo Honey dont get angree at me ok. I still Love you Why i go angree was that i could not download the form on time. But the last form which you sent, that was the only form i could scanned out from my computer.

Hope you are geeting better honey, I pray so. I have filled the form now, and i have attarch the form below inother for you to print it out and give to the Western Union Office immediately. Inother for them to give you the MTCN Numbers ok. Onces it is given to you send it to me immediately ok.

So that i can get the money here and pay to the Bank and use the others for my Flight Fee and other Expenses.

I hope you get the mail soon in a Good conduction, and feel happy my LOVE.

Regards
Your Love Joseph Smith


The filled out forms are attached...I'll upload them later, they aren't too exciting. Meanwhile I was away for a couple of days, and I got this:

Quote:
Hello Honey,


What is going on, I have been waiting for your email sinces yestaday but no email from you. So i desided to send you another email, what is going on? You know i love you honey. I cant even Eat, or drink water, pls honey get back to me. I have filled out the Western Union Form. So you can now give to them ok.



I have to go now and i hope to hear from you soon.

Regards
Joseph Smith


So I replied with this:

Quote:
Joshope

Im a hoome now I wash at me sistersss housh. I needded a brake to thimk aoubout ush. I have tooo mush vodka but I am beeter now. I need to tack a napp then I can write moor to you . I got yuur formsh and I'll bring them to weeester union in the morrninnng when I nto so drunk. I sorry I dramk tooooo mush. I be betttter later. I stil looooove you hoooooney.

Millie


He wrote back:

Quote:
Hello Love Millie,

How are you doing today? I got your email, are you ok? You email which you sent to me, there was alot of spellings mistakes. and i know that you have never right like this before, what is going on?

I pray to God you are ok, I still love you no matter what. Just try and get the MTCN Numbrs tomorrow from them ok.

So that i will come down to you honey and kiss you lips and make you forget about your sorrow and bring you god life with my hands on your wast. and make a new love again.

Love you honey, And pls take Good Care of your self before i come ok.

I hope to see the MTCN Numbers soonest

Regards
Yours Love Joseph Smith


AWWW! He's worried about me! My reply:

Quote:
My Dear Joseph,

I just woke up from a nice nap. I guess I had a little too much vodka to drink when I went to stay with my sister for a couple of days. She always does that to me -- we get to talking and laughing, and the next thing you know, we'll have gone through three or four full bottles! I normally only drink about a fifth of vodka a day (sometimes a little more, if it's a very stressful day).

I was so glad to see that you still love me, and that you sent me the forms! We should have this money very soon now! I forgot to tell you that when I got arrested for drunk driving, they took my driver's license away. So now I have to take the bus everywhere. I really dislike the bus. It always smells bad, like someone puked in there. Sometimes the driver throws me off. He says I talk to myself too much. I say, I might as well talk to myself, because there's no one else on the bus worth talking to! Of course I won't have to worry about that for too much longer. Once you get here, I'll buy us a nice Mercedes with my lottery money, and you can drive me wherever we need to go.

So I will have to take the bus down to the Western Union office tomorrow so I can give them these forms and get the MTCN numbers. Boy will I be glad when that's done! The Western Union office is closed today, because it is the Memorial Day holiday here in America. I don't suppose you have that holiday in England, do you?

Until then, here's what I want you to do. I want you to write me an email telling me in GRAPHIC DETAIL exactly what you are going to do to my sexy body once we are together! I want to know where you will put your tongue, and how deep you will penetrate me. I want you to tell me exactly how big your penis is, and what it will feel like when you stick it in me. Come on baby, tell me everything! It will give me something to think about when I lie in bed tonight touching myself. Oh, and you'll be happy to hear that my bunny is working again! It just needed new batteries and a couple of good smacks, and he's back vibrating away. MMMMM!!!!!! We are going to have SO much fun!

I'm eagerly awaiting your email with all the details!

Love,

Your Sexy Millie


His reply:

Quote:
Hello Honey Millie,

How are you doing today? I just received your email, How was you Night hope you had a nice time, and also i hope you dreamed of me?

If so i am the happyest person on this health. So how was your Holiday with your sister? Hope you had a wonderfull time?

hahahaha dont mind me ok, I just want to know how close between you and your sister.

oooohhhhhh I am so sorry that the Police men are with your driving license, But you can take a Bus down or Tax.

So when you give them the Form tomorrow. They will immediately give you the MTCN Numbers.

I belive by the ending of Next week i will be with you.onces i get the money next tomorrow. i want to hold your wast and kiss you down to your toung and put my dick on your Pussy oooooooo are you feeling it? Hahah i am coming out ha i am coming out ha ooo fuck me fuck me.

oooo Honey i want you to do some thing for me ok, i want to be with you now.
Go to your bedroom, Close the door, sit down on your bed open your legs wilder, Put one of your finger inside your pussy.

emagine i am there with you. ha i am puting my dick on your pussy now oooooo fuck me fuck me hah i am holding your sexy Body ha ooo do you enjoy it.

oooo i am out ha

Hope you are ok honey, Hope you are out too, i dont feel like living right now, I feel like writing More Honey.

But dont worry ok, I pray tomorrow the western Union Will release the MTCN Numbers and onces that is done. before next week i will be there with you, To have them done live.

I love you honey, Hope to hear from you soon.

Regards
Anord Still


BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!! Well, I'm glad to see I have such a compliant mugu, but WTF is "Anord Still"???

Anyway, tomorrow I'm finally going to slap him for the plagiarism I will have just discovered in his earlier emails to me. The time seems right now. Stay tuned!

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transparanoia
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Joined: 18 May 2007
Posts: 28
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PostPosted: Tue May 29, 2007 4:46 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Cachuma wrote:
i want to hold your wast and kiss you down to your toung and put my dick on your Pussy oooooooo are you feeling it? Hahah i am coming out ha i am coming out ha ooo fuck me fuck me.


R.

O.

F.

L.


There are no words.
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MeadowLark
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Joined: 24 May 2007
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PostPosted: Tue May 29, 2007 4:51 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Nothing like reading through a bit of money-induced steam/foolishness.

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Ima Baeder
419Eater Admin


Joined: 03 May 2007
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PostPosted: Tue May 29, 2007 4:52 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Very graphic. Yes indeed. Hilarious also!

"I am coming out, I am coming out" Laughing Laughing Laughing

Also funny that he says all the love/sexual stuff and keeps adding: don't forget about the MTCN!!

And, did he forget who he was supposed to be and sign the wrong name???

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Cachuma
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PostPosted: Tue May 29, 2007 5:47 am Reply with quoteBack to top

I just wish I had another ugly picture to send him! It just kills me that he's saying all this after actually LOOKING at her!

Y'know, I just had a flash of inspiration. I can tell him that the picture I sent him wasn't really me...that I just sent that picture because I wanted him to think I'm beautiful. And then I'll send him an even UGLIER picture! And demand that he tell me I'm beautiful again, of course.

Hmmm...I might have to hang onto that thought. I'm afraid that might twig him out...I might save that for later on, when I'm bored with him and need to see just how desperate he really is. I've got a few more ideas to torture him with before I go there.

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Master Nicholas [email protected]: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
pony pony Safari = Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
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Jimmy Jazz
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PostPosted: Tue May 29, 2007 8:52 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Cachuma wrote:
i am coming out ha i am coming out ha


Not a good time to promote this I would have thought.

So he prefers "penins" after all then?

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Cachuma
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PostPosted: Wed May 30, 2007 9:46 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

And a new twist! (I decided to do something a bit more dramatic than the plagiarism slap...)

Here's Millie's response to Joseph's "coming out" (BAHAHA!!!) email:

Quote:
Joseph, your email just had me all a-twitter! I barely slept all night, staring at your picture and thinking about all the exciting things you wrote.

My face is starting to heal a little bit. The worst cuts have stitches, and it appears that they are working, as they are not oozing quite so much puss. I'm still going to need to get some plastic surgery, especially to repair my nose, most of which was ripped away. It has a skin graft on it right now, with skin they took from my ass. Oh dear, Joseph, now I'm worried again that you won't love me with my face all ripped up! Please write me back and tell me that you'll still love me and want to fuck me, even with this sliced up face.

I'm just having my breakfast now, even though the morning is almost over. I like to pour a little vodka over my rice krispies -- mmmm! I'll have to feed you some of this when you get here. I'm sure you'll love it as much as I do. As soon as I'm done with my yummy breakfast, I'm going to head right down to Western Union with your forms, and get the MTCN numbers. Yippeee!!!! We're almost there, honey! It's going take me a while - I have to take two different buses to get down to the Western Union office downtown. And I'm going to have to make a stop at the liquor store on the way, because I just poured the last of my vodka into my cereal bowl, and that is NOT good! And besides, I think I should get myself a nice bottle of champagne to celebrate getting the MTCN numbers. Hey, any reason to party works for me!

Okay darling, I'll write you back as soon as I have the numbers. PLEASE write me and tell me you'll still love me with my face cuts!

Love,

Millie


After another sweet, loving email from my darling Joseph, I sent him this:

Quote:
Hi Babeeee,

I've had succh a goood day! I went to Weshtrn Union and brought them the fomrms. They were so happy! Or maybe that was jusht ME that was sooo happy. I'm so happy because I got the MTCN humbers! Yippeee! I''vebeen celebrating ever since, wiht the BEST champagne! I just hav velt so wunderrfulll all day. Then I realized I never SENT you the MTCN numnberss! Thashts SO funny! hahahaha!!!!

Here, my gargling, I am attaching the receipts now. I hope I do this right! Nowq that you have this, I want you to go buy your plane ticket right away! There's nothing keeeeping ush apaart now! We can be togetver forEVER!!! I cdan't wait to get married and even more, I can't wait to get you into my BEEED!!!!

Okaay its so late now and I so tired and mabee a leetle bit drunk but happyeee!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!

Love,

Millie


And attached this:

Image

This morning I woke up to this:

Quote:
Hello Millie

How are you doing today Honey? I love you so much honey.

Honey there is a problem, when i got your email, I downloaded the Wester Union Money transfer recept which you sent to me. But i could not see the Recept cleaily, I even Used my Glases, but culd not see it, so i printed it our from the computer i could not still see it. Oh honey what you have to do now is to Look to the recept there and give me only the MTCN Numbers for Both Money which you sent: The $2000 MTCN and the $5000 MTCN Number.

Do that immediately and send them to me as soon as possible.
I hope to see them soon, Honey dont worry ok, I will be with you soon. I will be the before you know it ok.

I love you honey, Latter in the day i will go to the AirPort to get Enquiren of My joney from United Kindom to US

Love you honey, Hope to see the MTCN Numbers soon.

Regards
Your Joseph


I didn't answer for several hours, then got this:

Quote:
Hello Honey

Do you get my first email? I have not had from you? I am begining to get worried honey? Get back to me I love you ok.

Hope to hear from you soon, and send me the MTCN Number from the recept of the Western Union There with you. I could not see it here, you know i useses Medicated Glasses, because of my eyes look. So i did not see it cleaily. so i want you to Look at it your self and send the MTCN Numbers to me for the two transaction which you send. Do that immediately.

Your Love Joseph


I let him stew for a few more hours, then decided to throw a NICE big curve into this bait!

Quote:


Subject: Sad News

Dear Joseph,

This is not Millie writing this email. This is her sister, Anita.

I am very sorry to have to tell you that Millie died early this morning. Yes, it is very sad news. We are all heartbroken. The only reason I am notifying you is because Millie recently came to visit me for a couple of days, and she would not stop talking about you. It seems that you two were deeply in love, and she was very excited about starting a new life with you. Which makes this news all the more tragic.

I'm sure you are as devastated as I am. If you wish to know what happened: Millie was struck by a bus as she was crossing the street, on her way to a liquor store. It's a long story, and I am too sad now to give you any more details then that. I may be able to share more with you later. Millie had had a problem with alcohol for a while, and it seems that is what finally claimed her life.

I don't know much about what was going on between you two, as she deleted most of her emails. But there are a few left in here that allowed me to understand a little. From what I can tell, Millie was the winner of some contest in England, and you are the person who was trying to get her winnings to her. It seems that over the course of your discussions with her, the two of you fell in love, and were planning on getting married.

What I would like to know now is, are you still able to send the lottery winnings, even though Millie has passed away? I don't know the legalities of that, but I am Millie's closest relation, and it seems to me that any money that was owed to her should be payed to her estate, of which I am now the executor.

Joseph, I'm sure this is very difficult and sad news for you. But I implore you to do the right thing, and help me to get the lottery money that Millie had won. For your efforts, I would be happy to share some of the money with you. Can you tell me how much she won? I'm sure that we can come to some sort of agreement. Perhaps you can refrain from telling the lottery officials about Millie's death until you have made sure that the money is safely here in her bank account. Again, I would be happy to share some of her winnings with you, if that would help you to do this for me.

Millie was a lovely woman, and had been so sad since her husband died. I am grateful that she was finding love again with you, and I want you to know that she had been happier in these last few days than I've seen her in many years. I now hope that your love for her will help you to want to help me, her loving sister and only remaining relative.

Please let me know if you will help me. Thank you.

Sincerely,

Anita Dick


I sure hope the name doesn't twig him out. If not, then my plan is to have the SISTER fall in love with him...and we'll start the whole process all over again! Wish me luck!

_________________
Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas [email protected]: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
pony pony Safari = Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
Closed lad accounts x15 Malaysia X1 United Kingdom X1

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transparanoia
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Joined: 18 May 2007
Posts: 28
Location: Australia


PostPosted: Thu May 31, 2007 12:53 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Brilliant! I can't help but feel a little bit sad at Millie's death. Her cuts were healing so nicely!
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Cachuma
Baiting Guru


Joined: 04 May 2007
Posts: 2284
Location: Blowing bubbles at 130 fsw


PostPosted: Thu May 31, 2007 1:03 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Yeah, I'm actually going to miss her.

Here's what I'll be sending out to poor bereaved Joseph in the morning:

Image

_________________
Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas [email protected]: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
pony pony Safari = Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
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Ima Baeder
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Joined: 03 May 2007
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PostPosted: Thu May 31, 2007 3:19 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

Bravo!

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Bait Voyeur
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Joined: 29 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: Thu May 31, 2007 1:00 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

clapping clapping clapping clapping

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Cachuma
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Joined: 04 May 2007
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PostPosted: Thu May 31, 2007 4:18 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I don't know why I'm so surprised...but he fell for it hook line and sinker! It's just mind-boggling.

Behold his response:

Quote:

SUBJECT: What What Is It True oo

Dear Anita

Tell me this is not true? Please tell me this is not true? Pls what am i to do in this World without my love Millie,hahahahaha i know this is a joke please dont play such expensive joke with me.

oooohhhhh Is this real dont tell me she is dead, oooo what am i to do now.You see i was surposed to help her claim her Lottery winnings in the bank due to our interations we came to know each other more better, We became in Love with each other, me and Millie was so closed, deep in Relationship,Love. But now all i am hearing is that she is dead. as i am here wright Now i am Crying ooooooo God why will you have to do this to us. why?

She was surpose to send down the fee which the bank requested for. before the Lottery Winnings will be release to her, and she had plans with that money when it comes.

As she said in here email i belive she really sent the Money which was $7000 she said $2000 for my coming down to the US To meet her, and why the other $5000 Was for the bank. so she sent the money through western Union Money Transfer. and i could not get the money due to the fact that the western Union Office ask for some details due to security reasons.

And latter she sent me a form to fill to prove to the wester Union Office that i am not a terrorism, so i have to fill that form and send it back to Millie, inother for her to show it to the western Union Office, to enamble the office give her the MTCN Numbers and other information of sending. So she did and sent me the Receipt of the payment. but when i received the recept as attarchment in my email, I could not see it very well because it was not cleair.

I printed it out but could not see it, So i decided to email her back and let her know that i could not see it cleaily. so what she had to do is to look to the recept there and send the information on the recept Vi email, But to my surprise In Return reply to my email, states that she is daed,oooooooo I cry again God Why? Why? Why?

Pls dont tell me she is dead pls, because if it happen i will kill my self. I dont have a reason to live again without her.

As for the lottery winnings, there is no problem about that if the $5000 is sent to me then i will pay to the bank, they will release your sister Lottery winnings and then transfer immediately. to your given account which you will provide to me.

Dont worry i will tell the Bank right away, about her death, and the willing of this lottery winnings has been given to Anita.

But that will take up to two days to do the Change of ownership, with a shot letter to present to the bank as prove that Millie is dead.

The amout which she won was One Million Pounds.

Get back to me as soon as possible. I am In pans Now.

Regards
J0seph Sm1th


There are just so many things to laugh about in that response, I can't even be bothered to list them.

I must say it's rather nice that he's not asking Anita to split the winnings! Anyway, Anita is now going to set her sights on him and win his love.

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Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas [email protected]: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
pony pony Safari = Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
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Ima Baeder
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PostPosted: Thu May 31, 2007 4:33 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Again, BRAVO!!! Laughing

This is my favorite part:
Quote:
Pls dont tell me she is dead pls, because if it happen i will kill my self. I dont have a reason to live again without her.

As for the lottery winnings, there is no problem about that if the $5000 is sent to me then i will pay to the bank, they will release your sister Lottery winnings and then transfer immediately. to your given account which you will provide to me.

Dont worry i will tell the Bank right away, about her death, and the willing of this lottery winnings has been given to Anita.


Quick shift there, huh?

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Cachuma
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PostPosted: Thu May 31, 2007 4:48 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Thank you thank you I'll be here all week. Wink

Yeah, I kinda wanted to ask him if he really plans on offing himself. Somehow I don't think so. I suspect the prospect of having another whacked-out broad fall in love with him and offer to send him all her money might keep him alive a little bit longer. Laughing Laughing Laughing

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Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas [email protected]: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
pony pony Safari = Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
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Ophelia Dikki
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Joined: 03 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 1:59 am Reply with quoteBack to top

You can string him out longer by saying that Millie's assets have been frozen while everything goes through probate so you can't send the money until then.
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Cachuma
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 2:05 am Reply with quoteBack to top

That's a thought. For right now, he thinks there's 7 grand already waiting for him at WU...if only Anita could find the receipts with the MTCN numbers!

She's currently looking for them...but before she sends them, she wants to see a picture of him to make sure she's dealing with someone trustworthy. (She's not quite as trusting as her poor late drunk sister.) Oh, and of course he has to be holding a sign. And the sign has to have her name on it. Her full name. Which is...Anita Dick! Twisted Evil Laughing Laughing

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Alex Mandl4: The past week has been the worst in my entire life, I have lost weight, I don't sleep at night, I left my job abruptly, and do you think it has been easy for?
Master Nicholas [email protected]: I must confess that i am higly obliged to be a cretin, it is a rare privilegde.
pony pony Safari = Mr. Mandl4 & Mr. Brown, 1480 total miles: Johannesburg to Gaborone; Gaborone to Maun; Back to Gaborone; back to Johannesburg.
Closed lad accounts x15 Malaysia X1 United Kingdom X1

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Cachuma
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Joined: 04 May 2007
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Location: Blowing bubbles at 130 fsw


PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 8:23 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

Okay well, as some of you know, this bait turned a bit serious when the lad accidentally sent me an email that was meant for a REAL victim. That's all being discussed in another thread. In the meantime, I thought I would go ahead and bring this thread up to date, so anyone interested can know exactly where it stands.

Here is the email the lad sent, after Anita asked him for a pic:

Quote:

Hello

How are you doing? I received your email and saw all you wrote. I Showed the Bank the Attarchment Copy of the News Paper Stating the One Million Pounds Owner of the Lottery winnings is dead. The Bank confirm that the News paper will stand as proof to really show that she is dead.

Now you said the winnings should be given to you as
Millie sister. Sinces Milline is dead in which account will the Lottery wins be transfer to. or end to?

You ask for my pic antia, I have attarch it below and and you also ask for a sign, I am sorry i don have the chance to do that, I am week, Lost of control, so that is not my problem, If you dont belive me and millie has something in comon forget about it, Go back to the western Union and get her money back, Now she is dead what am i to do in this world, what will i enjoy without her.

Or Do you think i care about her $5000 or $2000 or the One Million Pounds. all i wanted was her Love, Because we have gone a long way in Love, we promise our self alot of Love and things to do when i come over to US. Now she is dead, why will i be happy.

I am sorry i cant do that, I still Love Millie ok. I dont really belive she is dead, I dont. Ok send me a picture of her coups. Then i will belive that my Love is dead.

As for the Lottery winnings, the bank confirm that she have up to three day left. to provide the $5000 for the
Handling/Administration Fee

Look i am just trying to help you out, and make sure the winnings cheque is sent to you. Based on the fact that millie is dead. The bank said that if the fee is not paid by next tomorrow, they ill suspend the Cheque.

ooooohhhhhhh I cry again God why?

Regards


From Anita:

Quote:
Dear Joseph,

I'm sorry to see that you are still so broken up over Millie. I must admit to being surprised at your picture. You are not the type of man that Millie was used to dating. She actually had quite a few boyfriends, and not a single one of them looked like you. She met most of her boyfriends at the Bada Bing nightclub in town. She usually had a new one every few days, so I was really happy that she'd settled with one man. Oh, how sad now that you two won't be together for eternity!

I still think you should come over here to say goodbye to her at her memorial service. I also think it would be a good thing for you and I to get to know each other better. If Millie could fall in love with you, I'm sure I could too. Would you like to get to know me better? I'm attaching a picture of me. It's not the best one, but it's the only one I can find for now. I would really appreciate it if you would tell me what you think about me. Do you think you could fall for me the way you did with Millie? I'm younger than Anita -- I'm only 45, but I promise you I could make you just as happy as she did. Maybe even happier. I know many more sexual tricks than Millie ever did. I could help you to reach peaks of ecstasy you could only dream of!

Well I'm still looking for those receipts. There are piles and piles of papers in her apartment. I promise to send them to you as soon as I find them. In the meantime, I would love to learn more about you. Do you have any children? How old are you? What do you like to do?
Please tell me what you think about my picture! Do you think you and I could try to get together?

Love,

Anita


Here's the pic I attached...Meet Anita:

Image

Then he wrote:

Quote:
Hello Anita,

I got your email and saw all you wrote, I mistakely send you an email which i was Surposed to send to my Friend Mick.My full name is (Joseph Smith) that is my full name and i Like playing Jazz, I have no children, I was suposed to have when i newly Got married to my Wife Joy. Buy latter after some years she died. after many years i have no wife just because i Love Joy so much, I never Looked at any other woman, After many years Working as a claims agent. then Luckly I found Millie, and due to the way we talk she remides me of my formal wife Joy. So i love her and we started Loving each other and make some plans for our self.

But anyway Before we can start to talk to each other i will like to see a pic of Millie Coups.and also tell me? How do you get asses to her email? I just want to know all this?

So you said we can have some thing in comon. What do you want me to do? Let me know? I am so confused

But i will like to know you more better too. Just to replace Millie, and not to make me think too much of her, if i see you it will looks as if i am seing Millie.

Getback to me as soon as possible.

Regards
Joseph Smith


This is when I saw that I got an asem that was meant for a real vic:

Quote:
Hello Mick

I got your email, How are you doing today? Mick i have told you before dont take things too hard on your self ok, things will get fine soon.

I know as for my self if things are Not working the way its Surpose to be i will get angry, But you will have to Note that this is the United Kindom and they take alot of process before things will be release to you her.

Mostly People who are Not from here. Mick what we have to do now. We must try our best to make sure this Fee they ask for is paid.

I will try from my own side, and you try from your Own side too.

I took the Bank to court today, Now the bank are signing a Document stating that if this fee is paid there will be no More fee to be Paid.

So the court has sign it, and the bank also sign too. We came to an agreement that if this is paid there will be no more fee tobe paid. and the Money will be transfer to your account Immediately.

Hope i am Understood Mick.

So try your Possible best, we cant give up.

I hope to hear from you soon.

Regards
An0rd Still


Anita writes back:

Quote:
Hi Joey,

Can I call you Joey? That just sounds so much more intimate than Joseph. Thanks for writing me back and telling me some things about yourself. I really do want to get to know more about you. Now that my sister is lost to me, at least if you and I can be together in some way, I will feel like I still have part of her with me.

Oh, about her email, all I did was go on her computer at her apartment. Her email account was already opened, she left it like that all the time, so I just took it over, and I've left it opened. I've been staying at Millie's place as I deal with her passing. There's so much to do. I still haven't made plans for her memorial service. I'm hoping that we can get this lotto money transferred over here first, so that I can afford to give her the kind of funeral she deserves. Right now I have pretty much no money, so I really can't even afford a decent casket. I went over to the funeral home today, but even the cheapest casket is several hundred dollars! I don't have that kind of money. I'm just a waitress at a truck stop, and I don't get paid much. That's why I could really use Millie's winnings, ya know? I think there might be an insurance policy, but I haven't found one yet.

I'm so sorry to hear about your former wife. Now you've had two women die on you. That sucks! Well I'll tell you what, Joey, I promise that if you and I get together, I won't go and kick the bucket on ya. I'll try to stay alive for at least a little while.

So lemme ask ya. You said you never had kids with your first wife. Millie was really too old to have kids, she was 52 and way past her prime. Me, I'm only 45 and I could still knock out a baby or two before I pass my expiration date. What do you think? If it turns out we like each other, ya wanna try for a couple of brats? I always wanted to have a kid or two, but I just never found the right guy. And I'll tell ya, you sure don't meet too many right guys at a truck stop. Oh, sure, lotsa guys wanna get in my bed, but they wanna get out as soon as they're done! I think you are the keeper kind. If I got you in my bed, I think you'd like it so much you'd never wanna leave.

Okay so back to business. I have not been able to find those goddamn Western Union forms. I'm going to go down there tomorrow and explain to them that she up and died, and as her only relative they need to give the money to me. Then I can wire it to you, and you can pay off the bank, and I'll get the $1 million, right?

Well back to searching through piles of paper. I have never seen so many piles of shit in one apartment! As much as I loved my sister, she was one hell of a slob.

Oh, and don't worry about that other email. Sounds like you've got other business deals going on. Hey, a man's gotta work, right?

Love ya!

Anita


(I'm trying to keep up the same level of obnoxiousness that has permeated this entire bait! It wouldn't do to turn serious on him now...)

He writes back:

Quote:

Hello Anita

How are you doing today? I got your email and saw all you wrote, thanks for the care you show to me due to death of my formal wife Joy. Yes if you feel like calling me Joey Insted of Joseph there is no problem i will accept it from you. The deal of me and you being together i dont really know what to say, Its like i am been Used by different Girls.

You said in your email that ou have been staying in Millies house, that is nice to cleain up her House sinces she is no more, So when will the memorial service be coming up?

As for the lottery winnings, You can go back to the western Union office and get the receipt, because there is no time on your side. the bank confirm that the Cheque will be In a suspend account in few days from now this has to be done Urgently.

Let me know when the memorial service will be coming up, so in that case we can get to see each other, after you have received the Lottery wins.

Get back to me with as soon as possible.

Regards


So Anita writes back:

Quote:


Joey,

What do you mean, being used? I'm not using you! What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Jesus, all I did was try to help us to feel better about Millie's death. I know I'd feel better if I could start up a new relationship with the man that my sister loved. Wouldn't you feel better if you were with someone who was close to the woman you loved? I think you owe me an apology.

About the money, okay I'll go down to Western Union and see if they'll give it to me. I hope they will do it without the receipts, because I just can't find them in this shithole. What do we do next? Can I have my bank transfer it into your bank, or something like that? That's gotta be the best thing, because it'll happen right away. Look, it's Saturday so my bank is open today until 4:00 pm. Hurry up and send me your bank account number, and I can head down there and do it today and get this thing done before they put a hold on my check or whatever it is you said they were gonna do.

I haven't planned Millie's memorial service yet. I don't have any money to do one! Look, I don't make a lot of money. I work at the truck stop, and my paycheck barely covers the rent on my doublewide. Whatever I have left I usually have to spend on my astrologer and palmist, because if I don't, all kinds of bad shit will happen to me. I know this because my my moon is constantly getting too close to the Abscissor, which is the killer planet that kills all light and if I don't defend my Acronychal rising, my belbinia will end up on the barren planets. And you do NOT want to know what would happen then! My palmist confirms all this, and the only way to prevent this astrological calamity is to perform star rituals at least every other day. And they are NOT cheap! The wine itself costs a good 20 bucks, since it has to be enough to go around the Copernican circle, ya know?

Look, I kinda gotta know. Do you want to come to Millie's memorial service or not? If you want to come, then I'll send you the $2000 along with the $5000, and I'll hold off on planning the service until I get my lottery money and you can get over here. If you don't want to come, then I'll just send the $5000, and I'll take the $2000 and do the service now. But I really need that money. So please, lets get this thing done, okay? Tell me where to send the money.

I still think we have a future, if you'll just think about it, okay? Take another look at my picture, and try to imagine how happy we could be together.

Love,

Anita


So that's where it stands right now. In the middle of this, another baiter sent him an email trying to get Mick's email addy, without my approval, which may very well cause him to twig on Anita now, since he knows that he asem'd Micks email to Anita.

So stay tuned and we'll see what happens.

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