work for jesus...

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Posted: Sun Jun 20, 2004 11:29 pm

I get an email from a mugu with the screenname "work for jesus" which also had that same phrase in the subject line. Same mugu nonsense, she needs money for orphans or some shit. Blah blah blah. Unfortunately I deleted the first letter, but here is my response:

Hi,
Sure, I'll work for Jesus. How much does he pay an hour?
Hugh

She replies to me...

>From: workfor jesus <[email protected]>
>To: "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>
>Subject: hello
>Date: Wed, 16 Jun 2004 03:52:58 -0700 (PDT)
>
>dear sir.
>are you ready to assistance or not.
> thanks.
> rev. caroline franks
>
>
>

oh boy, she wants me! I reply:

Dear reverend frank,
well, dearest, what do you think? I asked you a question, so obviously I want to help a sister in Christ. I am surely washed by the blood of the lamb, and my congregation is always willing to help a sweet sister.
Yours in Jesus H. Christ,
Rev. Dr. Hugh G Rection

she responds....

>From: workfor jesus <[email protected]>
>To: "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>
>Subject: RE: hello
>Date: Thu, 17 Jun 2004 12:12:38 -0700 (PDT)
>
>--- "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>
>
>
>
>>dear rev.
>if you work for jesus your reward is above the sky not
>on earth.
>please rev i want you to come to our aid please .
>we need your assistance.
> thanks.
> may the good lord shine his face on you amen.
> rev. mrs caroline franks
>
>
>

Sheesshhhh, I guess I won't even get minimum wage from the Lord...I write:

hi rev,
whats up, sister, yea, i truly am washed in the blood of the lamb, and i feign true interest in helping you, dear. let me know how.
yours in Jesus H. Christ,
Hugh

she replies...

>From: workfor jesus <[email protected]>
>To: "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>
>Subject: RE: work for jesus
>Date: Fri, 18 Jun 2004 05:31:28 -0700 (PDT)
>
>dear rev.
>iam so glad i got your mail.
>please all i need from you is a little assistance of
>funds so i can take care of them.
>i need little funds to provide the followings.
> i need to buy them some clothes.
> i need to take them to hospital for medical care.
> to send them to a christain school to train them up
>in the way of thy lord .
> please these are the little assistance i seek from
>you so i can beat to their demands.
> hope to hear from you soonest.
> thank and the lord be with you amen.
> sister caroline franks.
>

oh! well, i better send her some money! I write....

Dear Rev baby,

Hallo there! My congregation and I would be so happy to help you! We were looking for the right place to perform some Christian charity mission work! A few of the congregants had suggested sending some missionaries there to Africa, but then expressed fears that they would get eaten by lions or cannibals or something. So, you seem to be the answer to our prayers! The Lord works in mysterious ways. So, what's the name of your church again? What's the name of the Christian school that you plan to send the little buggers to?
I am very excited. Perhaps your church and mine can become sister churches! If you can, send me a picture of your church, I'd love to see it.

Yours in Jesus H. Christ,
Rev Dr Hugh G Rection

she replies...

From : workfor jesus <[email protected]>
Sent : Friday, June 18, 2004 2:48 PM
To : "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>
Subject : RE: hello

| | | Inbox

--- "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>

dear rev.
iam so glad to recieve your mail iam so happy.
the name of our church is SEED OF LIFE BIBLE CHURCH.
and the name of the christain school i want to send
them is BISHOP CROWTHER BIBLE SCHOOL.
please i dont have any of the picture of my church
ok.
for those coming to africa they are welcome i will be
glad to recieve them with joy ok.
hope to hear from you soonest.
please we need your assistance fast please do
something for us please these refugees are waiting for
your help.
thanks.
caroline franks

well well well! To be continued...

Posted: Sun Jun 20, 2004 11:37 pm

I fire off a reply to miss mugu:

Hi,

Well darlin, how can I help you, exactly? I am a minister in the Church of the Bread and Wine. Have you heard of our ministries? We have quite a few branches worldwide, but sadly none in your Godforsaken little country.We are ready to assist you and the little buggers any time you need.

Yours in Jesus H. Christ,
Rev Dr Hugh G Rection

waiting....

Posted: Mon Jun 21, 2004 8:47 pm

Miss mugu sends me a request!

>From: workfor jesus <[email protected]>
>To: "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>
>Subject: please your assistance is needed
>Date: Mon, 21 Jun 2004 07:38:56 -0700 (PDT)
>
>--- "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>

>dear rev.
>i need your help.
>please assist us with little funds to pay our bills
>please .
> thanks.
> sister caroline franks.
>

"little funds", eh? Not so fast, mugu. I'll send a letter. I have a feeling that this broad has been baited before, so she'll most likely tell me to bugger off after this letter...but who knows?

Sister Rev baby,

Hey hey, of course my congregation would like to help you. Of course, there are certain conditions that must be met...we can't just send money to ANYONE. Last year my church donated over 6 million dollars to charity...each dollar given enriched our souls. We have to be assured of your sincerity, and like the saying goes, I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine. What can you do for MY church? We would dearly like to set up a ministry in your country to convert heathens and help the poor. Would you like to be a representative of our church? That would be great, and perhaps we could establish an official sisterhood between our churches. I want my name to be well known in your country...I want to be known as the man who saved many many poor souls and brought them to be washed in the blood of the Lamb. I am a soldier for the Lord, and I want people to be guided by my staff to see the Light of the Lord.
Reverend, I want YOU to be my staff in your country. What I need you to do is set up an account so that we can funnel our donations to you. In return, I need you to send me proof that you will set up a mission on my church's behalf.
The Charity Committee requires you to send us a photo of yourself and some members of your church holding a large sign or banner which says in large, clear letters: STAFF OF HUGH G RECTION
Then send us the bank account info and we will send you an initial donation of $3,000 dollars, which will be followed by amounts based on your needs.
Once the amount is set, we also would like you to mention our church as your sister church whenever you conduct services, and we would be honored if you decide to keep the sign or banner which says STAFF OF HUGH G RECTION inside your church. That's it! Pretty simple, huh?
May the Lord keep you blessed forever and a day.
We await your photo.

Yours in Jesus H. Christ.
Rev Dr. Hugh G Rection

Well, we shall see! To be continued...?

Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2004 2:43 am

mugu responds...and with a pic! but not the pic I want!

>From: workfor jesus <[email protected]>
>To: drhughgrection
>Subject: Fwd: SISTER CAROLINE FRANKS PICTURE
>Date: Mon, 21 Jun 2004 15:09:21 -0700 (PDT)
>
>Note: forwarded message attached.
>
>
http://img78.photobucket.com/albums/v299/magua/sister_caroline_franks.jpg

I reply:

Hi Rev Baby,

That sure is a nice picture. Now in order for us to get the donation process we'd like to have a picture of you and your church members holding a sign or preferably a banner that states "Staff of Hugh G Rection."

Yours in Jesus H. Christ,
Rev Dr Hugh G Rection

I get another mail:

>From: workfor jesus <[email protected]>
>To: "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>
>Subject: RE: please your assistance is needed
>Date: Mon, 21 Jun 2004 15:06:38 -0700 (PDT)
>
>DEAR REV.
> I SWEAR TO GOD THAT I WILL SET UP YOUR CHURCH IF YOU
>GIVE ME THE GO AHEAD AND ALSO PROMISED TO ASSIST ME IN
>THE BUILDING OF YOUR CHURCH.
> ALL MY MEMBER HAS ALSO PROMISE THAT AS SOON AS THE
>MONEY IS SEND TO US WILL ARE GOING TO CHANGE THE NAME
>OF OUR CHURCH FROM SEED OF LIFE TO YOURS.
> MY COUNTRY WILL ALSO KNOW THAT A GREAT MAN LIKE YOU
>IS IN OUR MIST.
> PLEASE THIS IS HOW YOU WILL SEND THE $3,000 united
>state dollars.
> send it to westren union money transfer cotonou.
> repbulic of benin.
> send it to our pastor philip olayinka.
> then send me the name of the send.
> the control number .
> the name of the sender.
> the country were the money was send.
> the amount send.
> please after will recieve the money will are
>going to send you a video of our member owing the
>banner please.
> i will also send you my picture.
> sister caroline.
>
>

This is one bold ass dumb mugu! I respond:

Dearest Reverend,

You obviously didn't comprehend the letter I sent you. I cannot release the funds until I have proof of your sincerity. Therefore you must supply the photo of the church members and the banner before we can proceed with the donation process.

Yours in the Christ,
Hugh

To be continued...?

Posted: Fri Jun 25, 2004 10:13 am

Miss Mugu Rev Baby responds:

>From : workfor jesus <[email protected]>
>Sent : Thursday, June 24, 2004 7:10 AM
>To : "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>
>Subject : hello

| | | Inbox

--- "Dr Hugh G. Rection"

Dearest Reverend

dear rev.
iam so very happy for your mail.
sir i want to let you know that will send the picture
of my church memeber to you just in 3 hours.

so sir i want to let you know i discuss with my
assistant pastor philip olayinka both of us and the
member of seed of life bible church as agree to change
the name of our church to your name of your church.
i also promise to send the picture of my memeber of
church hoilding the banner of staff hugh g
reaction.
thanks.
sister caroline franks

Wow! Has she really caved in to my demands so quickly? I reply...

Dearest Reverend Caroline,

This is just splendid news! This is working out better than I dared dream. I have even better news: The Donation Committee agrees that your Church will receive additional money since you are going to change the name of your church to ours. You are then entitled to Groundskeeping and Building and Maintenance Funds, for after all, we cannot have a sister church looking shabby, can we? I am very excited and anxiously await your photo so we can get the process rolling. Holler back!

Yours in the Big J.C.,
Rev Hugh

Confused

Well...we'll wait and see what happens.....

Posted: Mon Jun 28, 2004 4:08 pm

Well well well, Reverend Mugu sends me two pics, and I must say that they are the most pathetic pics I've ever seen...absolutely HORRIBLE fakes.

>From : workfor jesus <[email protected]>
>Sent : Friday, June 25, 2004 11:44 AM
>To : "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>
>Subject : HELLO MY HIGHNESS

| | | Inbox

--- "Dr Hugh G. Rection"

DEAR REV.
SEASON GREETINGS TO YOU.

I WANT TO LET YOU KNOW THAT IAM SENDING THE PICTURE
OF MY CHURCH MEMBER I MEAN SEED OF LIFE BIBLE CHURCH
COTONOU BENIN.
I ALSO ATTACH THE PHOTO SHOWING MY CHURCH MEMBER
WITH THE NAME STAFF OF HUGH .G . REACTION.

I DID THIS ACCRODING TO HOW YOU SAID I SHOULD DO IT.

PLEASE THAT IS WERE WE WORSHIP AND NOW IF WILL RECEIVE
THE $ 3,000 UNITED STATE DOLLARS YOU PROMISE TO HELP
THE REFUGEES I WILL BE SO HAPPY PLEASE BECAUSE THE
ENTIRE MEMBERS OF SEED OF LIFE BIBLE CHURCH HAS NOW
AGREE TO USE THE NAME OF YOUR CHURCH AS OUR NEW NAME
THAT WILL BE GIVEN TO YOUR CHURCH.

SO PLEASE COME TO OUR AID.

CAN YOU SEE THE PLACE WE WORSHIP DOES THAT FIT US.

IF YOU WANT TO SEND THE MONEY I MEAN THE $3,000 PLEASE
SEND IT TO PASTOR PHILIP OLAYINKA.
WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER COTONOU BENIN.
HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOONEST.
THANKS .
MY HIGHNESS.
FROM ME.
SISTER CAROLINE FRANKS

Here they are:

http://img78.photobucket.com/albums/v299/magua/HGR2.jpg

http://img78.photobucket.com/albums/v299/magua/HGR1.jpg

Then, the bitch sends me this e mail. Mad

>From : workfor jesus <[email protected]>
>Sent : Sunday, June 27, 2004 10:42 AM
>To : "Dr Hugh G. Rection" <>
>Subject : RE: hello

| | | Inbox

--- "Dr Hugh G. Rection"

dear rev.
i am still waiting for you people please.

i did what you ask me please try and help me to put
smile on the face of those refugees.

thanks.
sister caroline franks

I think a smile would be on those refugees faces if they didn't have to deal with a retard like Rev Franks!

Posted: Tue Jun 29, 2004 4:37 pm

I have just sent Rev. Mugu an e mail which rejects her photos. For some reason, this broad pisses me off more than the average mugu. Is she really dumb or is she on to me? Well, we'll have to wait for a response![/b]