I Re-named her Children (Now with Trophy!)

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lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

I hope she doesn't mind that I re-named her children (and re-named her, for that matter):

Zanele Dube (scammer)
George Herman Ruth (me)

Dear.

I am Mrs. Zan3l3, the wife of late Lucky Dub3 the world reknown legend of reggae who was shot by heartless car jackers on thursday 18th around 8pm when he went to drop our children (Bongi, Nonkululeko, Thokozani, Laura, Siyanda, Philani and three-month old Melokuhle) at a relative house, my husband (43 years) who had worked all his life for Gallo Record Company; singing in the music industry after a 25-year career. my late husband Dube recorded 22 albums in Zulu, English and Afrikaans in Johannesburg (South Africa).

Before his tragic death. He told me of one contract he signed on behalf of his producing record company and secretly deposited the sum of US$7.5 Million.(Seven Million Five Hundred Thousand U.S.Dollars) with a Bank in Europe. Presently, this money is still with the Bank and the management just wrote me today (after hearing of his death) as the beneficiary that our account has been DORMANT and if I, as the beneficairy of the funds, do not re-activate the account; the funds will be CONFISCATED or I rather issue a letter of authorization to somebody to receive it on my behalf (note that you need to activate this account).

...and so on.

Dear Zanele Ube Dube,

I am interested in helping you in this financial matter. I am so sorry you lost your husband Ube Dube to these car jackers. I think you should call me at 309-424-XXXX so that we can talk about this.

This are the ratios I demand for helping you and your children Bingo Bango Bongo and Irving:

5% for expenses

55% for me

40% for you and the children

Sincerely,

George Herman Ruth

Dear George Herman Ruth,

Thanks for your mail and may the GOOD LORD bless you and your family for accepting to share with me equally due to the circumstance surrounding me at this moment. It is my desire to allow you clear my funds for the sole purpose of sharing equally.

I would want you to know that my late husband (Mr Dube) deposited this funds with Hilton Finance and Security Manchester-England. Do remember that you need to pay for the over duration of time the funds US$7.5 Million has stayed with the Security Company.

I want you to contact the SECURITY COMPANY now, see below the contact Information of the officers in charge:

Contact info followed. Then I accept a counter offer of 50-50%.

Dear Zanele Ube Dube,

I accept your offer to share the ratio equally. This means 50% for me and 50% for you and your children Bingo Bango Bongo and Irving.

I look forward to hearing from you.

I asked some questions about my contact at the security company, R3v P3t3r P3r3z and got this:

Dear George Herman Ruth,

I was once asked this same questions you just asked concerning his name" R3v P3t3r P3r3z" He told me he is not a clergy but a title he earned while growing as a kid in his neighborhood because of his holy-like atitude, he is just the manager of Hilton Company and not a priest or clergy as the word sound. He is a good man.

Follow all his instructions and inform anytime you hear from him and remember to hasten up in this transaction as we have very little time to clear this funds.

As soon as it is clear I will arange to come over and meet you personally to assit me invest in your country. Please do not tell a word to anyone concerning this transaction for the fear of my late husband family.

My reply:
Dear Ube Dube.

Thanks you for the explanation for R3v P3t3r P3r3z's name. He must have been a good kid. Are any of your children Revs? How are the children, by the way? How is little Irving coming along?

I will send the moneys to Rev Peter if you send me a picture of yourself.

George Herman Ruth

Impatient little ladette:

Dear,

Like I said in my first email to you, that I want a kind and active man who will act under my instructions and hasten the transfer conclusion with the Security Company for the release of the funds.

By now; I thought you would have asked the security company the requirements and the amount and whatever is needed to settle this transaction, I am been humiliated here by his family and there is a rumor speculations going on now that I (Zanele Dube) sent assassins to kill my husband because of his money. I stand between life and death and you are my only hope, if you are willing go ahead and clear the bills and take your % and. I need a life.

Stop delaying this transaction from progressing; please as; I need you to be truthful in your dealings with me as a woman and a sorrowful woman as that.

I recieved an email from the Security Company complaining that you dont look serious for this assistance.

I am still wondering about "poor little Irving":

Dear Ube Dube,

I am sorry about your situation but you must understand my position. I do not know you or your children Bingo Bango Bongo and Irving. I must have some proof that you are who you say you are. Please send me a photo so that we can get on with this transfer.

By the way, how is little Irving?

Sincerely,

George Herman Ruth

I wonder how long this lad/ette will ignore my calling the children Bingo Bango Bongo and Irving...

Posted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 7:22 pm

S/he could care less what you call the nonexistent children, so long as you want to send them money Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 Mar 2006 Posts: 7103 Location: Yes

Nice names. I don't think the lad will ever care what you call them unless you should demand handwritten letters from them thanking you for your generosity.... Twisted Evil

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

Well, yes, I agree that she should care less what I call the children. It's just that I am surprised she hasn't twigged at my absurdity. This is going to be an exercise in how absurd I can get before the ladette twigs.

I do like the idea of demanding thank-yous from Bingo Bango Bongo and little Irving.

BTW -- does anyone besides me remember where those names came from?

Posted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 7:56 pm

You forgot 3 month old Little Ukelele Laughing

Posted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 7:58 pm

Unless the first line reads "I have contacted the security company and am ready to pay the money" she's (yeah, could be HE) is going to demand you 'hurry up' the process. Her cohorts have probably told her/him that you/we are keeping the thing going and you/we have not once asked for the amount you need to pay, thus you get the "Oh heavens, I'm in dire life endangermenting here..." letter. YOu could call the kids Harpo, Groucho, Chico, Zeppo and Big Butt Bertha for all she cares.

One thought, put commas between the words "bingo bango bongo" so it looks more like a list. And, if you're going to ask about Irving, ask about the others. Which ones are male and which are females? Tell her your love of children and how much you want to help THEM (not her/him, but THE CHILDREN) and you may get more interest from her on that line.

Posted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 8:24 pm

Bingo, Bango, Bongo and Irving. Are those the band member names of the faux Beatles band called the Mosquitoes from the Gilligan's Island episode? You could have named all of them George. Very Happy

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

^^^^ Give the contestant a prize cigar! Yes, those are the Mosquitos from the Gilligian's Island episode. They were actually played by a real band, The Wellingtons. This is also the band that performed the show's theme song.

Thanks for all your suggestions. Once again, it isn't that I expected him/her to CARE about me re-naming the children. I am only expressing surprise that the lad/ette didn't twig at my adsurdity.

I have to wait for his/her reply but I will try some of your suggestions next.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 8:36 pm

bunnyrabbit - I liked her line

Quote:

I need a life.

hehehe
Some lads would twig instantly, others are not so bright. Smile

Posted: Fri Nov 09, 2007 2:27 am

You could send an email from another email addy claiming to be an executive from the late husband's record company wanting either the music he was contracted to make, or repayment of the cash advance paid to him.

Posted: Fri Nov 09, 2007 1:02 pm

kept calling barrister "Mr Blobby" throughout one bait (http://www.scamorama.com/eliza_bobby.html) and he showed no sign of twigging...

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

The latest. I think I have got on her nerves some:

Geroge Herman Ruth (me)
Zanele Dube (scammer)

Dear Ube Dube,

Perhaps my request for a photo was a bit too much for you ok. Here it what I want you to do instead of the photo. I want to see each of your children: Bingo, Bango, Bongo, and little Irving to send me "thank you" notes in their own handwriting. If little Irving is too young to write, Bongo can help him. Scan them and send them to me and then I will contact the Security Company.

I do hope little Irving is feeling better today.

George Herman Ruth

After the advise of a friend, I have decided not to send you my scan pictures as you do not sound serious, you talk like you are trying to set me up with FBI or something.

For God sake why the hell will my children be involved in this transaction?

I have taken all the risk on behalf of my late husband family to send you these scan pictures of burial procedure.

I don t know you and I want you to send me a scan picture of your international passport.

Take care and dont narrate me to anyone.

Mrs Zanele

She doesn't want me to narrate her to anyone!!!

Dear Ube Dube,

Yes, very well. I will send you a holographic scan of my passport. You have to click on the green button to see the inside. Now, plese send me scan of the thank-you notes from your children Bingo, Bango, Bongo, and little Irving. I do hope little Irving is over his croup today. Have Bongo help him with the letter.

George Herman Ruth

Sent her a "holographic" scan of a US passport cover with a green button to click on to open it. Naturally the button is not really clickable. Oh yes, I bolsterd the .jpg file with about 8 MB of junk.

I am not sending you these scan pictures to persuade you to assist me clear my funds. I am sending you these pictures because I want to be sincere with myself in truthfulness.

I have seven children (Bongi, Nonkululeko, Thokozani, Laura, Siyanda, Philani and three-month old Melokuhle) and please; stop confusing me for someone else. I cannot and I repeat that I cannot involved my seven children in this, I can't do that ok.

Do I have to beg you to clear my funds for as low as $1,744.00 only. compare to what you stand to gain from my late husband funds of US$7.5 Million, and even sharing 50-50% with me, do I look like a fool?. If you feel you can capitalize on my present predicament to humiliate me and my children, that wont be possible.

If you know you cannot contact the Security Company today and make the clearing payment of $1,744.00 dollars, then kindly stop contacting me. I cannot involved my children. I take the advise so forget it if you can't make the payment.

Bye for now

Ha. Finally got her goat.

Dear Ube Dube,

Thank you so much for the pictures of you. I think one picture had one of your children in it. Which one is it, Bingo, Bango, Bongo, or little Irving?

You have done very well but you forgot ahout the thank you notes from the children. Send me the scans of those notes written by the chldren thanking me for my help. Have Bongo help little Irving with his. By the way, is little Irving feeling better today?

George Herman Ruth

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

She's getting a little perturbed:

George Herman Ruth OR WHATEVER YOU CALL YOURSELF. DO NOT CONTACT OR SEND ME ANY FURTHER EMAIL AGAIN!!!!

IF YOU DO. I WILL BLOCK YOUR MAIL FROM REACHING MY BOX ACCOUNT. AM NOT THE KIND OF WOMAN YOU PLAY AROUND WITH. F**K YOU!!

YOU SENT ME A FAKE PASSPORT THAT DOES NOT OPEN.

Too bad. I really like "playing around" with her! Laughing

I explained to her that it was a holographic scan and she had to set her computer to holographic mode. I sent her another scan, one that can only be opened in Windows Vista. Twisted Evil

Moderator Joined: 10 Jan 2007 Posts: 14513

Great bait! A nice lad rant and some good siggy material.

You could slap him now, but he seems like too much fun. You could always apologize and claim you only did that since you did not think she was serious (or some other excuse like that). Play nice for a few days, waste his time actually make him believe you are a serious maga, and then demand the pictures again Twisted Evil

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 10:11 pm

Funny stuff from the pet...hehehe. Very Happy

You really got under her skin!

Posted: Sun Nov 11, 2007 4:01 am

Short, direct, and none to sweet! You went in pissing, and came out wiping your back side with her smile... or something. Really well done! 5 stars!

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 May 2007 Posts: 18313

Very funny bait! Laughing

The first time you mentioned having Bongo help little Irving with his thank you note I nearly choked on diet coke and chex mix. Laughing

Of course, when they tell you not to contact them again, you know what that really means. Wink

I've been told to go away a few times but they strangely change their minds afterward. . . I think it has something to do with money.

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

She's giving me one more chance!

I have given the Security Company an instruction not to respond to your mail or neither give you any informations about my late husband funds.

For the fact that you want my children involved in this makes you looks suspicious.

You are not to be trusted any longer. If you insist on assisting then follow this instructions now

1) Send the clearing payment of $1,744.00 dollars to the Security Company immediately without delay.

2) Immediately my funds is cleared, Mr Peter Perez will will split the funds and send individual money to his or her designated account chosen. I cannot transfer all my funds into your account! am afraid.

3) I don't ever want to hear anything pertaining to my children and the thank you letter you ask them to write, if I ever hear that again in your mail I will block your email address.

Dear Ube Dube,

I find it very funny that you should say it is I who look "suspicious." I have been quite forthright with you all this time. I have sent you no less than two scans of my passport. Did you send me a passport? No. I have shown interest in you and your family, even calling your children by name. I have expressed interest in the pictures you sent me and I thanked you for sending them to me. Why in the world would you say that I look "suspicious" after all I have done for you so far? You really make me quite angry at you but I will still consider helping you because of your children. I have to think about it though because I am so angry at you now. I have contacted the security company and told them how uncooperative you are and I also told them about the bad word you put in your last e-mail.

Another thing: Earlier you said something about me trying to set you up with the FBI. Why would you be worried about the FBI? Only bad people and terrorists have to worry about the FBI. You are not a terrorist or a bad person are you?

Let me think about this. I would like to send the moneys to the security company but I am not sure right now because of my angry feelings toward you.

Warmest Regards,

George Herman Ruth

I don't know for sure but I think I've been handed off to a different lad. This one seems to have a better command of English.

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 Mar 2006 Posts: 7103 Location: Yes

Success! You've gotten "her" off script, angry and yet coming back for more. A hat trick. Laughing

Not quite a Newb Joined: 31 Mar 2007 Posts: 79

Quote:

You are not to be trusted any longer. If you insist on assisting then follow this instructions now

That is classic! Well done, Bunnyrabbit! Go help her whether she likes it or not!

Or, at least, help little Irving!

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

Good to be back home! Oh, it continues! Now we are doing some negotiating with the security company.

Zanele Dube (scammer)
Hilton Securities (scammer)
George Herman Ruth (me)

Dear Hilton,

Thank you for your continued patience in the matter of Ube Dube. The latest is that Mrs. Dube has contacted me again and now is being somewhat nice again. I am undecided as to whether or not to proceed with this transaction because of the dirty word (Fu*k) that she used in an earlier e-mail to me. That was not very nice of her, was it?

I will keep you abreast of further developments. If you have any influence on Mrs. Dube I suggest you recommend to her that she begin cooperating with me or she will not receive my help.

Sincerely,

George Herman Ruth

We have received an instruction from Mrs Zanele Dube to further with you all necessary arrangements in regards the transfer. She has also informed that as soon as the funds are cleared, we should split the percentage equally and transfer 50% to your designated bank account. We therefore require you to send us your choice of account on confirmation of your payment.

This is to inform you that we have concluded your transaction having received an email from Mrs Sarah Baxter to accord to you all needed support for the release of this funds. Kindly reconfirmed your mailing address for adequate delivery .

Sequel to your availability to come up with the required fee for transferring your funds, we have decided to transfer the funds to you in form of a Bank Cheque, this procedure is less expensive and also very safe. I must inform you that if the required charges are not paid within the next three official working days I 'll advise you to stop contacting this Bank.

This is to inform you that we have concluded your transaction and cheque is to be courier to you. Kindly reconfirmed your mailing address for adequate delivery .

Dear Peter Perez [Hilton Securities],

I believe I made it perfectly clear that Zanele Ube Dube is delaying this transaction by her insulting e-mails, uncooperative spirit, and dirty langauge. Please tell Mrs. Ube Dube to e-mail me with a sincerely apology. I will only proceed with this transactions after I receive an apology from Mrs. Ube Dube. If I do not receive a sincerely apology directly from Mrs. Ube Dube this transaction is off.

I really do not care any more about Mrs. Ube Dube since she has been so rude and insulting to me. I want to complete this transaction mainly for the sake of poor little Irving.

Who is Mrs. Sarah Baxter?????

George Herman Ruth

Dear Ube Dube,

As I just told the security company, unless I receive a sincere apology directly from you this transaction is CANCELLED. If you want to go through with the transaction send me a sincere apology at once. Attach a photo of yourself with a sign that says "I Am Very A Sorry Person."

George Herman Ruth

She didn't like that:
YOU WILL GET NO SUCH APOLOGY FROM YOU!!!

YOU BETTER STOP CONTACTING THIS EMAIL YOU THIS UN SERIOUS BRAT!

Dear Ube Dube,

I am VERY SERIOUS about this transaction. I will pay the security fee as soon as you do as I say. That is what you want, is it not? I don't care about you at all but I am doing this for little Irving.

You have sent me emails that are very insulting and you continue to do so. You sent me an email with a very bad word, "f**k." This is a very very big insult in my country. Most people would have nothing to do with you any more. I should be the one who is angry and yet you show anger and continue the insults.

Now I want to see this apology with the sign I described. When I see it I will imediately pay the security fee. I will foget all about the thank you letters I earlier demanded. You children do not have to write those any more.

Now stop being an insulting little woman and get on with the apology.

Sincerely,

George Herman Ruth

Dear Peter Perez Hilton,

I must inform you that Mrs. Ube Dube has sent me another insulting e-mail. She is seriously jeapordizing this transaction. Now, you want me to send you the $17,000, right? Well then, you have to talk to her and tell her to abjur to my instructions.

George Herman Ruth

Trophy Videos · Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 1:33 pm

bunnyrabbit,

Since your pet said this:

Quote:

YOU BETTER STOP CONTACTING THIS EMAIL YOU THIS UN SERIOUS BRAT!

I think you should respect her wishes. Smile

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

After a long silence, Zanele is back! She doesn't want to be "insultive" but she has not carried out my wishes regarding the apology photo with the sign reading "I AM A VERY SORRY PERSON."

Dear Herman,

I dont mean to be insultive but you have to understand my plight and my humiliation that I am receiving on daily basis from my husband family. If you really want to help like you claimed, contact the security company to provide you with the payment information and make the needed payment to have this funds release to you within the next 2-3 working days and lets share equally as earlier planned.

You are causing toomuch delay and it makes me think you are an unreliable person, prove yourself and do what I asked you to do, only after this transaction can I come over to meet you personally for your kind assistance. I plan on travelling by December 14th to canada and I can as well travell over to see you.

I dont want anymore instructions from you. If you do, I will stop finaly in responding to your mails.

In Good Faith

Mrs Zanele

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

My reply to Zanele:

Dear Ube Dube,

It is good to hear from you. How can you say that I have been causing delays? It is YOU who have caused the delays. If you had sent me the simple photo I asked for we would both have our moneys now. Can you not see that YOU are causing delays?

I have given the matter quite a bit of thought and I really should have nothing more to do with you after you have been so insultive to me. You used a very bad word at me, "F*ck." You DO need to apologize for that. I was going to just forget all about you but I keep thinking of little Irving and how sick he is. I feel that I need to help little Irving.

Here is what I am going to do to show you that I am a serious person. I am going to send half the money to the security company now. Then I will expect you to do some apology to me. After that I will send the other half.

I am doing the not for you, you insultive little woman, but for you children Bingo, Bango, Bongo, and Irving.

Good Day,

George Herman Ruth

Me to the security company:

Dear Hilton,

I am afraid that Mrs. Zanele Ube Dube continues to create delays in this transaction by her insultive attitude toward me. However, as I said earlier, I want to get on with this transaction so that I can help her poor little Irving.

I have agreed with Ube to send you half of the amount you requested now. Then, when her attitude toward me improves and she becomes cooperative I will send you the other half.

I am sending you the moneys ($850) via e-st3rnuni0n. This is a completely web-based money transfer branch of Western Union and is far more secure than Moneygram. Go to www.e-st3rnuni0n.fdns.net and sign up. I will take care of everything else so that you will have your moneys right away.

Sincerely,

Geroge Herman Ruth

Zanele didn't like my idea:

Dear George Herman Ruth,

I thought you wanted to prove a point to me today that you are serious now, but you have come up with another plan of delay again. I received an email from the Security Company that you instructed them to sign up on www.e-st3rnuni0n.com to receive the money online.

Hilton Finance and Security Company has email me to inform you, they do not receive money or payment from such online transaction, please note: you are to send the money according to their mode of receiving payment and not you trying to direct them on what to do.

If you do not make the payment according to the Money Gram payment information that they has given you, you leave me with no doubt than to think that you are still the man I think you are.

And I reply:
Dear Ube Dube,

First of all, it is not www.e-st3rnuni0n.com, it is www.e-st3rnuni0n.fdns.net. This is a perfectly legitimate company and much more secure than Money Gram. If Hilton Securities has a problem with e-sternunion, they should contact me themselves and tell me exactly why their security company is not equipped to receive payments from ANY legitimate company.

As for you, Ube Dube, you have done nothing but cause delays in this transaction. If you had sent me the photo I requested we would be finished with this transaction already and poor little Irving would have his medicine. Why do you keep causing these delays? Why can't you just do as I ask?

Since 1TV5 is down at the moment I think my next step if s/he rejects e-st3ernuni0n is to send a MG receipt with the control number wiped out and tell him/her the Security Company gets the number when I get my photo with the sign: "I AM A VERY SORRY PERSON." Of course, I think the probelm is the "she" is really a "he."

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

Next round:

In he name of God I beg you please, please forget this transaction and leave me and my helpless children alone for our lives to decide its own cause. You have tried and caused alots of delay and yet you demand that everyone must act to your decision.

Now I know that you don't want to make the payment, please do not bother to assist me again, I beg you to stop contacting me ok. I appreciate your efforts. If you cannot make the payment according the company's payment information, then forget it my good friend.

I like you very much but please do not contact me or the security company again.

Thank you for your understanding; Mr Herman.

Dear Ube Dube,

My dear woman, you astound me. You have been insultive to me. You have used a very bad word to me. You have been uncooperative and have caused delays time and time again and yet you have the audacity to say that it is I who am causing the problems. You astound me, woman.

I don't care a rat's ass about you, Ube Dube. But I still do care about your children. I desperately want to see little Irving get his medicine and I don't want to see Bingo get in trouble with the police again and Bango needs help with his learning disability. So I will go ahead and sent the $1700 via mailgram. You will hear from the Security company soon.

Sincerely,

George Herman Ruth

And to the Security Company:
Dear Hilton,

Ube Dube contacted me again and told me that you will not accept payment from e-sternunion. I can't believe you are so stupid and incompetent that you cannot even see that this is the most secure way to send moneys. What a Security Company. You are about the most unsecure bunch of boobs I have ever met ok.

Because so are so stupid and incompetent I will make it easy for you. Here, little boy, is a scan of my Money Gram ticket. There is also a security form you must complete and send back to me. Now, little boy, go to the MG office and collect your stupid moneys you stupid little man.

And go tell Ube Dube that she has been the most uncooperative person I have ever met

Sincerely,

George Herman Ruth

Naturally, the MG ticket I sent had a little blemish over some of the digits of the control number. Twisted Evil

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