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 Motoring References in the Bible

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DarkKnight
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Joined: 21 Jul 2005
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 4:25 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

My poor sick pet is quoting the bible at me, it appears that Jesus successfully described 20th century motoring well before it's time..I knew he did miracles but I didn't know he invented the speed bumps, traffic lights and the internal combustion engine.

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I believed in god and the Bible. Philippians 4:13 --- I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. The road to success is not straight. There is a curve called Failure, a loop called Confusion, speed bumps called Friends, red lights called Enemies, caution lights called Family. You will have flats called Jobs But, if you have a spare called Determination, an engine called Perseverance, insurance called Faith, a driver called Jesus, you will make it to a place called Success. Beloved One

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Raoul Duke
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 4:40 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

LOL

Jesus built my hotrod...

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Serengeti
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 5:35 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

@Raoul

I think that's part of the new Turbo lineup on TLC, right between American Hotrod, and American Chopper. And cohosted by Mikey? Smile

Edited: I almost forgot the 11th commandment:

Thou shall not covet thy neighbors custom chopped and channeled coupe

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Last edited by Serengeti on Thu Mar 15, 2007 11:08 pm; edited 1 time in total
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mike hunter
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 6:44 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

I thought the 11th was "Friends don't let friends drive VWs"

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Tommo Shanter
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 7:16 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

<br>Jesus took me for a Sunbeam...

Image

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Spudz
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 12:03 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Philippians........ ? what book is that then? Confused

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crossfire
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 12:10 am Reply with quoteBack to top

He left out stop signs,

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stop before your scammed

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Don
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 5:22 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Raoul Duke wrote:
Jesus built my hotrod...


Now that was music! Thumbs up

Image

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Roycropper
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 9:53 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Moses had a motorbike, with loud pipes....

Quote:
And the roar of Moses' Triumph could be heard throughout the hills and valleys

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Spudz
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 10:59 am Reply with quoteBack to top

What about Hosanna in a Hi-Ace? (Irish Primary school joke Rolling Eyes )

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Javed Main:I received your e-mail message but cannot read very well due to the injection I took last night/Please for Gods sake i would'nt like you to address my bank as feck/You are a priest and you are bold enough to tell me that you took 3 bottles of the finest whiskey/Please i am not ready to take more of your insult.

NIGERIA HE GOAT
IF YOU EVER SEND THIS TYPE OF THINGS TO MY EMAIL;; I WILL SHOW MY SELF TO YOU BASTAD NIGERIA HE GOAT....F*CK OFF AND DIE OF UNGER


YOU ARE SUCH A NONENTITY, I NEVER KNEW PEOPLE LIKE YOU STILL IN EXISTENCE. WHAT AN INGLORIOUS BASTARD ARE YOU?

Closed lad accounts x 10-2x33/8 you do the hokey cokey and you turn around and that's what it's all about
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HitchHiker
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 11:30 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Everyone knows the Romans invented speed humps. It was to stop the boy chariot racers causing too much noise and pollution in the streets of Jerusalem. It was a big problem in the Holy Land in those days.
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