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JoeTam
** REMEMBERED **
Joined: 16 Nov 2005
Posts: 2153
Location: Pulling foil arrows out of my head.
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 12:32 am |
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Luckily, I was just a beer swiller at the time. My ex wife decided to whip up a pitcher of screwdrivers. ( ) This was in a very old adobe ranch house. A suitable ceramic pitcher was found. While the light was quickly fading, ingredients were added, and stirred well. The other 3 enjoyed their drinks, and I drank beer. Once the pitcher was done, the ex went to make more, then a scream. We all ran into the adobe. There was a mouse carcass in the bottom of the vessel I'll let you figure out the moral of the story for yourselves. |
_________________
Your moms pu$$! smokes ciggarettes, she whistles in the stadium with your Papa's D!@K.
Nwokeke.
I went to bank. they call police, why you do this to me? I canntsend you anything now.
Goat dog |
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it wasn't me
Elite Baiter
Joined: 18 Feb 2007
Posts: 1043
Location: sitting in the corner drinking wine, eating cheese
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 4:47 am |
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Ewww!!!
There are so many 'horror' stories out there!
The only one I have was when my small person was about 5yrs old and I took her to a 'Brewers Fayre' I think they're called, or is it a Toby something, anyway, she had the childresn meal of spaghetti bolognaise.
Half way through eating it (I was chatting to a friend) she said "Mummy, I don't like this" I turned to look at her and she had her fingers in her mouth (as kids tend to do).
Next thing, she pulled out of her mouth a piece of soft plastic that was about 6" long and 1" thick!!
No one in the restaraunt (ie staff) were interested and still tried to charge me for the meal!!
In the end, coz I was so pissed off with their attitude, I informed health and safety.
After about 3 months of letter writing and complaining, what did I get in return...?
A bloody free meal voucher for the same restaraunt!!! |
_________________ Do not be sceptical be pessimistic - Lotto scam.
I just don't know how to express the gravy of my happiness. - Barrister M Abd0lla
you nose i have been away in the middly east. -Ali Al1
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Red
Baiting Guru
Joined: 25 May 2007
Posts: 2543
Location: 6°27′11″N 3°23′45″E
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 4:53 am |
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IBTLS (in before the law students)
What you experienced was the founding case of modern tort law:
Donoghue v Stephenson (D v S for those in the know).
You should sue your wife and claim damages!
That said... no reason not to keep drinking... in fact... more reason to drink! I'm concerned that she didn't wash out the jug... remind me never to accept an invitation to your place for dinner |
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Connie L. Gus
Moderator
Joined: 07 Oct 2005
Posts: 7243
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 6:23 am |
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Dead mice don't drink much and who cares about the flavor pellets or the mouse twinkle that the little critter did in the bottom of the pitcher after it climbed in and before it died. The thing I would worry about is what the acid did to the lead glaze in the pitcher. |
_________________ x8
LISTEN TO ME WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR ONE OF THOSE CHEAP CROOK OR WHAT -tobi donito
-a few,
LISTEN I CAN NOT TAKE YOUR SHIT ANY LONGER WE HAVE WHROTE A PETITION AGAINST YOU TO THE FBI WITH ALL OUR EVIDENCE YOU ARE INTO PROSTITUTION,DRUG DEALING, FORGERY, CREDIT CARDS FORGRY WESTEN UNION FALSIFICATION,DRUGING MEN,COMMETING MURDER, STEALING, DRUNCARD, ALL THIS WE HAVE THE EVIDENCE TO PROOF OUR CASE AGAINST YOU.-Johnson Hill
I am not finding it any funny...Henry A., Lagos, Nigeria to Cotonou, Benin, WIMPed
I am stranderd. Henry A. Lagos to Accra, WIMPed for 67 days.
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate |
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Doctor X
** ACCOUNT CLOSED **
Joined: 15 Apr 2007
Posts: 766
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 6:35 am |
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Many a year ago, an idiot friend getting over a break-up that came one year too late.
I offered to take him to a place I knew but he was all excited about "passing for 21" or some such nonsense. So he went out and bought the booze.
Captain Morgan Spice Rum.
"What will we do with this?" I asked.
"We can make Rum-Cokes!" he chirped.
"Have ye bought said Coke?" I enquired.
"No, but we can get it from a machine. . . ."
"From . . . . a . . . machine . . . on . . . a weekend?"
"Weeellll. . . ."
I figure it is "his party" as he runs off in search of this wonderful Coke.
I put the kettle on.
He returns with:
. . .
. . .
. . . wait for it . . .
. . .
. . . Grape Fanta.
Yes.
Captain Morgan Spice Rum and Grape Fanta
He mixed the two and started drinking. Me? I was overcome by a sudden case of kuru or something. "I will just have . . . tea." He encountered some acne ravag'd skank in his Journey, so he followed her off.
I grabbed the trash can.
I found he had made it one flight of stairs. I placed his head in said can and allowed him to expel his concoction.
You may close the thread now. . . .
--J.D. |
_________________ וגם־אני נתתי להם חקים לא טובים ומשפטים לא יחיו בהם
ואטמא אותם במתנותם בהעביר כל־פטר רחם למען אשםם למען אשר ידעו אשר אני יהוה |
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full auto
*** BANNED ***
Joined: 30 May 2007
Posts: 555
Location: Lost in a digital age/provided by tor.
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 6:51 am |
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Kind of reminds me of the following joke only you had a mouse:
An englishman is in a bar and a fly lands in his beer. He walks out of the bar.
A Scotsman is in a bar and a fly lands in his beer. He picks it up out of the beer, smashes the fly violently on the bar, and then chugs his beer.
An Irish man is at the bar and a fly lands in his beer. He picks it up by the wings, starts shaking it, and begins yelling "SPIT IT OUT!!! SPIT IT OUT YAH THIEF!!!!"
No bad drinking experiences... unless you count coors in the mix of beer (AKA: Colorado Cow Piss). |
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GordonBennett
Baiting Guru
Joined: 29 Mar 2007
Posts: 2829
Location: Pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 7:07 am |
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First got pissed on Cherry Brandy in a block of flats.
I know what vomit does over the course of a 17 storey plummet |
_________________
DIE MUDER FUCKER
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Red
Baiting Guru
Joined: 25 May 2007
Posts: 2543
Location: 6°27′11″N 3°23′45″E
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 7:27 am |
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^^^ Home brew for me. Turns out we overestimated how much sugar should be used and accidentally ramped the alcohol percentage up to 15%... we were rooted. |
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justjay
Baiting Guru
Joined: 22 Mar 2007
Posts: 2412
Location: ~Data Miner & Esoteric Trivia Collecter~
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 7:43 am |
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Mine was mixing several small bottles (1/2 pints) of peppermint schnappes and many beers. (two of us and two 12packs, beer for beer and my friend didn't like pepermint to start with) Store owner got really mad when on the third resupply run in less than a couple of hours, I somehow accidently "painted" the front door this weird looking greenish color. And for some odd reason, haven't cared much for the smell of peppermint since then. |
_________________ Dubitando ad veritatem pervenimus
aa419.org member
Site Killing x uncounted numbers
|¿?|
Over 1000 - no longer counting since sometime in 2008 + #unknown# assists
WDPRs >150 Netcraft>115
----
- just because... |
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Don
Baiting Guru
Joined: 25 May 2004
Posts: 3045
Location: Italy, 87.2.222.132
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 7:49 am |
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Thunderbird (white wine with a not so subtle hint of petroleum) and Lightning (cheapest Cider around, tastes like goo). It's like drinking from a fuel tank but it gets the job done. |
_________________ x12
No sugar plum fairies have been hurt during the process of creating this message.
**"Freedom? There ain't no fuckin' Freedom!"** |
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TheGreatOok
Catbingo
Joined: 25 May 2007
Posts: 2355
Location: Lost in L-Space
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 11:08 am |
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I was being really cheap and bought some MD 20/20 and then tried to mix it.... nuff said. |
_________________ For Free Bananas Click Here!
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Samuel - Ziguinchor, SE to Dakar, SE - 264 km through Gambia Helping JojoBean
"I knew rigth from the first time you sent email to me that,you are a bloody *DELETED*" - Sgt Daniel Vess
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"THE FOOL STOLE YOUR US$755, HE DOES NOT DESERVE TO LEAVE ON THE PLANET" - Jim Ovia
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x4 |
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iMike
Elite Baiter
Joined: 21 Jan 2005
Posts: 1371
Location: Ministry of Serendipity
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 4:00 pm |
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In the good old days, when I was a student, my housemates & I tried homebrewing some bitter from a cheap kit. Never quite turned out right though - looked like someone had been sick in a bucket & took the lumpy bits out. There was a pub at the end of the road which sold 4-pint takeaway jugs (brown plastic). We bought a few of these, emptied the good stuff out of them & filled them with our brew, then took them to parties where we could leave them on the communal booze table & drink the good stuff. We stopped getting invited to parties after a while.
Some years later, I made 10 gallons of elderflower wine - picked the elderflowers from a field near a local farm. Threw the lot away when the farmer appeared in the local paper having been caught burning toxic waste! |
_________________ --
x2
"you have luke worm in your brain" - Ekaetta Bello
"invite me to your country and let me clearify your legitimacy asshole" - Mose5 Uzem3
"the transfer was not authorized due to my persistent double mind" - Clement Wank
"this is not the time to play planks" - Mack Anthony
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JMRazor
Baiting Guru
Joined: 03 Mar 2006
Posts: 7103
Location: Yes
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 4:40 pm |
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In college we used to make a drink called "Skip and Go Naked" -- (from memory): cheap beer, frozen Minute Maid limeaid mix, vodka -- mix in a large cooler with ice cubes to get really cold.
Tasted good at the time. |
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wayne
Account closed at users request
Joined: 05 Dec 2005
Posts: 3630
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 5:50 pm |
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Don wrote: |
Lightning (cheapest Cider around, tastes like goo). |
I used to drink Pulse cider from the local Spar back about 10 years or so. It was on offer, �2 for a 4 pack, buy one get one free. That stuff was pure evil in a green can. |
_________________ x56 |
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remmy223
Elite Baiter
Joined: 12 Jun 2006
Posts: 1734
Location: butt f*** middle of nowhwere
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 6:36 pm |
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just one from my memory of quaffing fine arrays of beers.
8 pints of mild then chased down with a pint of red witch (pernod,cider and blackcurrant juice)
i went home wearing someone else's legs and of course emptied my stomach contents in the house.
never touch a red witch since.
@joetam atleast there was the whole mouse in the pitcher!!! |
_________________ x 356
bike shop
you are bauitfull i will show the picture to my kid
Death man walking.
Click here to support 419Eater.com |
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iMike
Elite Baiter
Joined: 21 Jan 2005
Posts: 1371
Location: Ministry of Serendipity
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 6:44 pm |
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^^^^ 4 pints of Boddingtons followed by 4 pints of draught Old Tom. Allegedly I walked home with a plank, convinced it was my best friend. Ahh the carefree days of higher (?) education. |
_________________ --
x2
"you have luke worm in your brain" - Ekaetta Bello
"invite me to your country and let me clearify your legitimacy asshole" - Mose5 Uzem3
"the transfer was not authorized due to my persistent double mind" - Clement Wank
"this is not the time to play planks" - Mack Anthony
WIFI PDA - post while you dump
SAY 'NO' TO GAS STORAGE!
<a href="/forum/donate.php">[FREE LAPHROAIG]</a> |
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remmy223
Elite Baiter
Joined: 12 Jun 2006
Posts: 1734
Location: butt f*** middle of nowhwere
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 8:16 pm |
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just been turfing for a german beer that my wife brought back from
her short stay in germany and found this brill beer site.
beers from all over the world,check it out all you quaffers
http://www.beersofeurope.co.uk/acatalog/
enjoy
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_________________ x 356
bike shop
you are bauitfull i will show the picture to my kid
Death man walking.
Click here to support 419Eater.com |
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Miss Behaving
Master Baiter
Joined: 20 Apr 2006
Posts: 190
Location: Down the bookies
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 9:12 pm |
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Singapore Sling
The one I tried was luminous pink and tasted vile, like cherry-flavoured mouthwash. My poor (male) friend ordered one and had to a. drink it and b. put up with being teased about his 'big pink fruity girl drink'. |
_________________ Come to the dark side, we have sweeties.
I bait scummy flatshare/rental scammers. PM the details if you encounter one!
x 5 |
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Connie L. Gus
Moderator
Joined: 07 Oct 2005
Posts: 7243
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 10:36 pm |
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Stop it already. Lock the thread. I'm losing all respect for the posters.
Now having said that, here's a recipe from my freshman days.
Mix-
Two gallons of Hawaiian Punch Concentrate (Makes 10 gallons of red punch, but don't add water.),
Twenty gallons of the Pride of Cucamunga (The stuff the Grateful Dead sang about, $0.50/gal),
Two gallons rot gut vodka,
10 oranges, sliced.
Twenty pound block of ice.
Reading back the notes to self from the next day, there's a notation to not hurl on one's own shoes. |
_________________ x8
LISTEN TO ME WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR ONE OF THOSE CHEAP CROOK OR WHAT -tobi donito
-a few,
LISTEN I CAN NOT TAKE YOUR SHIT ANY LONGER WE HAVE WHROTE A PETITION AGAINST YOU TO THE FBI WITH ALL OUR EVIDENCE YOU ARE INTO PROSTITUTION,DRUG DEALING, FORGERY, CREDIT CARDS FORGRY WESTEN UNION FALSIFICATION,DRUGING MEN,COMMETING MURDER, STEALING, DRUNCARD, ALL THIS WE HAVE THE EVIDENCE TO PROOF OUR CASE AGAINST YOU.-Johnson Hill
I am not finding it any funny...Henry A., Lagos, Nigeria to Cotonou, Benin, WIMPed
I am stranderd. Henry A. Lagos to Accra, WIMPed for 67 days.
* Help Keep Eater Running - Click here to donate |
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it wasn't me
Elite Baiter
Joined: 18 Feb 2007
Posts: 1043
Location: sitting in the corner drinking wine, eating cheese
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Posted:
Thu Jul 19, 2007 11:28 pm |
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^^^
I thought we were talking about gross stuff, not just getting bevvied up, because I don't get bevvied up....
Except for the time when my very good friend was driving me home in her little 850 mini and I thought it was a hilarious idea to moon a police car.
The window was open.
We got pulled up. I fell out of the car and couldn't get my breath I was laughing so much. She got breathalised, I got a date |
_________________ Do not be sceptical be pessimistic - Lotto scam.
I just don't know how to express the gravy of my happiness. - Barrister M Abd0lla
you nose i have been away in the middly east. -Ali Al1
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Roycropper
Baiting Guru
Joined: 14 Nov 2005
Posts: 7992
Location: Luxury Coffin
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Posted:
Fri Jul 20, 2007 10:19 am |
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@ iMike, Do they still sell Old Tom in half pints from a small barrel on the bar? Had about 3 pints once as a student, i remember not being able to feel my mouth anymore came as a surprise...
Never found a drink I couldn't drink, though the Tia Maria left over at the end of a party could give my chucking up muscles a workout.
Not as vile as the mouse, but the fag end hitting your teeth at the bottom of the beer can, and realizing you got mixed up over which can was the ashtray sticks in my mind. |
_________________ the European Union has bounced on our freckles
COULD YOU IMAGINE WHAT HAPPENED WHEN I WENT TO THE BANK
our Agent is Completely broke, pocketless and stranded
I WLL SEND AN AFRICA WITCH TO ATTACH YOU BASTARD
You go die like bird
i started shouting HALLELUJAGOBBLE but none of them notice me immediately police arrested me due to the shouting
f*ck u asshole ur damn mother will loose ur fcuking skull brain ur brain is nothing to compare with rat f*ck ur u
MY FRIEND ALEX WAS DETAINED IN POLICE STATION
I am not happy due to the question i answered at money office. Let me tell you do not play with me ok.
x4 6Yrs x6 |
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thud419
Baiting Guru
Joined: 04 Jan 2006
Posts: 3193
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Posted:
Fri Jul 20, 2007 11:52 am |
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In the spirit of Trainspotting...
(and for the record this is a very long time ago.)
I remarked to a mate there nothing tasted worse than dragging on a spliff that had gone out.
He replied that I'd obviously not had "roach tea". It seems that's when you smoke your entire stash before bedtime. Then the next morning, desperate for a hit, you take all the dead ends from the night before, brew them up in hot water and drink it.
He was right, I've never been anything like that desperate. |
_________________ Click here to feel warm and cozy.
I did not f**k your wife in any way -- Nike Akanbi
I don't know what else to do or do I continue filling and filling forms. -- Barr. Koloti
you has been dribbling me up and down but I will show some thing you have never seen before, I think you breath air wait and see. -- Barr. Cole
x14
x 0.25 won from Reaper in a sucker's bet
x8 x several |
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Corona
Baiting Guru
Joined: 21 Sep 2006
Posts: 8809
Location: On ya left!
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Posted:
Fri Jul 20, 2007 11:57 am |
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remmy223
Elite Baiter
Joined: 12 Jun 2006
Posts: 1734
Location: butt f*** middle of nowhwere
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Posted:
Fri Jul 20, 2007 12:38 pm |
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Ginch
Master Baiter
Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 208
Location: Here...and there!
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Posted:
Fri Jul 20, 2007 2:03 pm |
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Myers 151 + eggnogg @ 50/50 = absolutely poisonous. |
_________________ Retired baiter, now mostly lurks in gen chat |
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