Lawrence Smith - You give love a bad name!

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Posted: Wed May 09, 2007 7:05 am

Dingbat # 1 is back, this poetry makes me want to puke.

Quote:

your love has revived my world of gloom and solitude.
your love has painted my world with a lot of colors.
your love has elevated to me to the skies.
your love has fulfilled my heart with immense happiness.
i love you my love ....

I don't know why I Love You! I JUST DO! It's sooooo hard to explain. They wouldn't understand if they tried to. One is never suppose to understand. Just go with the flow. Let the chips fall wherever they may. Kissssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssss......

I met this person that gives me brand new hope for waking up each morning.
I had ideas about a type of person for me. Beautiful inside and outside, lovely, smart, courageous, considerate, intelligent, warm-hearted...
I am The Blessed Man in this world to know JENNY. She is like vital oxygen for my existence.
I am gonna stand on a mountain top, and the world that she takes my breath away.

i might send him one of my (Jenny) semi nudes and see whether he pees his pants.

Posted: Sat May 12, 2007 4:57 pm

Oh FFS!! What the hell's this guy smoking???

[17:48] lawrence_smith500: I pulled the blinds shut and took off my clothes, tucking them behind the chair. I then put on a light robe and waited. The moonlight washed in, draping a light shadow over my body. I began to grow hot with desire and started to run my hands all over my body, caressing my stomach, arms, and legs, reaching every pleasurable place and stopping myself from moaning.

[17:50] lawrence_smith500: Finally, I heard a car door slam and I waited patiently. As he walked in the door I stood up and saw a smile cross her lips. How I wanted to kiss those lips, to pull myself into him and kiss her. But, instead I walked over to her and began unbuttoning her pants. I slowly pulled them down, revealing her boxers. I could almost feel her womanhood, waiting for me, and me waiting for her.

Posted: Sat May 12, 2007 9:09 pm

Quote:

revealing her boxers

WTF

Quote:

I could almost feel her womanhood

Does that mean the woman was a guy?
I think he taking more than pot .... Laughing

Posted: Sat May 12, 2007 9:16 pm

This is what I sent on 7th May with a nice pic

Quote:

Hi my dear Lawrence,
I really loved your poetry! I loved it very much!
I wait very much for my oxygen bottle on top of the mountain.
Yours Jenny
PS: I wait for the photos to show me your family!

Here are his replies this morning:

Quote:

You are my love, my life and I truly want our marriage to grow with more love,honor and committment for each other than ever before. If we can keep communicating with each other and work together as we are one flesh,we will be able to live together until eternity and with the grace of god,be happier and more in love every day.I realize what it would feel like to be without you,i really love u so much jenny..

lawrence.

I love you, more than you can every emagine. You mean everthing in this world to me you are such a blessing to me and no matter what my unconditional love for you will always remain the same. Everytime we meet eachother's eyes everytime we touch and everytime I see you smile I feel magic surrounding everywhere. I just wanted to make this dedication to you to let you know I love more than ever jenny.

lawrence.

Lucky I haven't had breakfast yet, as it would have been all over my monitor puke

Posted: Sat May 12, 2007 9:20 pm

He sent me that last one in IM today. The cheating toerag!!

Posted: Sat May 12, 2007 9:26 pm

Maybe he is not as dumb as he looks, he can copy + paste Surprised

Posted: Sun May 13, 2007 12:01 am

Hey! So haven't heard from him in weeks! Since he found Jenny pretty much, sigh. Actually thought I blocked him, then look what shows up today!

Finally, I heard a car door slam and I waited patiently. As he walked in the door I stood up and saw a smile cross her lips. How I wanted to kiss those lips, to pull myself into him and kiss her. But, instead I walked over to her and began unbuttoning her pants. I slowly pulled them down, revealing her boxers. I could almost feel her womanhood, waiting for me, and me waiting for her.i love u so much "my name"...

lawrence.

lolol 2 funny! OMG Jenny I don't know how to tell U this.. But I think he's trying to cheat on U!?? lol YA no he'll still got no response from me..
He seems to get stupider as time goes on, didn't think it was possible?
Well have a great weekend!

Not quite a Newb Joined: 11 May 2007 Posts: 54

you should toss him a change up and send him a picture of a nutsack and see what he says

Posted: Mon May 14, 2007 2:40 am

Actually there is a pic in here, someone posted with their jatz-crackers hanging out, maybe I'll use it?

Here it is!

http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=102370&highlight=

Posted: Thu May 17, 2007 5:27 pm

Lawrence tried his magic on me and forced me to endure the worst attempts of cybersex imaginable. Anyway, today he decided to try his luck again, but I wasn't having any of it

[17:54] lawrence_smith500: okay
[17:54] lawrence_smith500: sweetie
[17:54] lawrence_smith500: can u talk about sex a bit
[17:54] lawrence_smith500: pls
[17:54] me: not today larry.
[17:54] lawrence_smith500: why
[17:54] me: because i'm not in the mood
[17:55] lawrence_smith500: okay
[17:55] lawrence_smith500: what colour of pantis are u puting on baby
[17:55] me: what did i just say to you?
[17:55] lawrence_smith500: pls
[17:56] me: i'm not in the mood larry.
[17:56] lawrence_smith500: u are not in the mood right
[17:56] lawrence_smith500: ok

Keep everything crossed for a special trophy off him, hopefully in the next day or so.

Posted: Sat May 19, 2007 3:45 am

Got this from him a few days ago:

Quote:

...How else can I put it,
in ways more than one, I have made you know that I love you.

I have told you that I cherish you; that I adore you.

But when I stumbled on this site, I knew it's a better way to let the world know you mean a greater part of me.

What I feel for you is endless.

Always me

lawrence.

and then the next day I got this trash

Quote:

thanks sweetie am very very happy now ....i really love u so much jenny.

Posted: Sat May 19, 2007 2:36 pm

how about these http://i189.photobucket.com/albums/z33/dstorie/pod3.jpg

Posted: Sat May 19, 2007 8:28 pm

Thanks DG I might use that one just to humour him

Posted: Sat May 19, 2007 9:10 pm

Great stuff guys ! Get some more poetry from him Laughing

Losst Jedi: Better not post your myspace profile here, some lads are actually reading this forum (though this particular looney surely doesn't Laughing

)

Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 9:54 pm

Now that he loves me so much:

Quote:

Dear Lawrence,

I'm glad that you feel the way you do, remember I said I was nervous and shy, I did mean it. Now mister I still wish to get to know you, so answer my questions please. I might feel a little less apprehensive about the whole thing.

What do you think of driving in a sports car?

What do you think of riding on a motorbike?

Do you like sitting on the front seat or the back seat of a car?

We really didn't talk about sex, how do you feel about it?

Do you have dreams of us waking up together? If so what did you see? I did, do you want me to tell you about it?

What size shirt do you wear?

What size jeans do you wear?

What is your shoe size?

What is your favourite cologne?

What is your favourite food?

What type of restaurants do you like?

Do you like horses? Have you ridden before?

Do you like sex? What is your favourite position?

That's probably enough for now.

Kisses

Jen

and his answers:

Quote:

hey sweetie how are u doing today.....wel i will be thinking about you in the sport car....
....what do i think of riding in a motorbike i will be thinking about you on my back
...i like sitting on the front seat
....i like sex very much jenny
....am thinking about you and i kissing eachother in the morning
.....yes i really want you to tell me about it jenny
.....size 39 L
.....size 40
.....size 45
.....pink and white with green
......i dont have any
.....chinese restaurants
.....yes
......i like sex very much the front position?
......i really love u so much jenny do u really love sex jenny.....

kisses from lawrence.

Just to throw off the script:

Quote:

Dear Lawrence,
Sorry for the short letter, but my grandmother died a few days ago and I am not feeling to good. She was a great friend as well as great Nanna
Jen

After 2 days I'm still waiting for my sympathy card. Sad

Posted: Sat May 26, 2007 7:59 pm

I got sick of waiting, here is my slap for not getting any sympathy:

Quote:

Dear Lawrence,
I am really surprised and really disappointed that you haven't written to me. I was really smitten with the poetry and all, but when I really needed you to tell me something nice or even send your sympathy or a shoulder to cry on about my Nanna you simply disappear. If this is the man you have become, perhaps you better stay where you are Mr Un-reliable. You should get a slap across the face, me thinking that you actually cared about me.
Sad Jenny

I wonder how long it will be before he has some money for the internet cafe? Or has he spent it all with Wayne @YIM Shocked

Posted: Thu May 31, 2007 9:42 am

Finally I got this a few days ago. I'm going to let him wait for my reply. I have to work some time Sad

Fair dinkum I'm going to gag ..... puke

Quote:

yes jenny i really care aout you sweetie okay.....is due to my business pls forgive me that i did not writ you a lovely poetry i really love you jenny can i pls have your phone number pls...i really wanna call you later..
baby i just wanted to let u know that i am thinkin of u and i lve u from the bottom of my heart.

Still dreaming of the day,
That you will hold my hand and ask me to stay,
To ask me to be your girl,
To forever be at your side,
To love you&to argue with you,
To laugh with you&to cry with you,
To share with you&to dream with you,
To be the one you love&make love to�
Still waiting for the day,
That you will say you are mine&I am yours, together we are one&will be in love.
jenny,I Love You!

lawrence cares.

and not long after (minutes)

Quote:

I MADE A HUGE MISTAKE & IM PAYIN THE PRICE. A MILLION APOLOGIES OR TELLN U HOW MUCH I LUV & CHERISH U DOESNT CUT IT. I UNDERSTAND U NEED SUM TIME. DESPITE ALL THIS WE BOTH KNOW OUR LUV IS REAL & IN TIME WE'LL BE 1 AGAIN. I HAVE NOTHIN BUT TIME TO PROVE IT ALL 2 U.
REMEMBER, U R MY LIFE & I WONT LIVE W/OUT U. I WILL NOT GIVE UP ON US. UR MY ANGEL & I LUV U MORE THAN U'LL EVER KNOW. COME HOME 2 ME.

i am so sorry if i have hurt you or did in our past the main thing is that you are alive and will be well and have love by your side always and more

What an arsehole, I'm thinking of dumping him, but I just might invite him to meet me...... Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 12:13 am

Couldn't resist:

Quote:

Dear Lawrence,
Thanks for your sympathy, it was appreciated although a little late I might add. Thanks also for the poetry too.
I want to meet you here in the States! I hope it is possible. Please write to me.
Kiss
Jen

Posted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 3:18 am

Send Larry the lover...(NOT) that that picture of the girl/guy who forgot to tuck her nutz in, is you and you need money to complete your operation because you love him so much and want to be a complete woman for him. Wonder what he would say.....lmao

Posted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 4:54 am

I sent him some pics from an old bait, so I will have to wait until after I've had my first facelift. If you've been following this bait you will understand that this guy is as dumb as fresh turd.

Posted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 4:55 am

sorry still gettin sic, lol
what a load!
Well waiting for next episode!
2 funny~!~
Maybe it's time to prove his love with a badly needed kidney or other body part? Make a donation to... um.. how big is his co**?
Oh, the chipmunk museum, ya, their not doing good lately...

Posted: Sat Jun 02, 2007 8:53 pm

Just as I thought another lie as to where this dumb turd claims to be from:

Quote:

yes is possible sweetie now i dont wanna lie to you jenny am really from spain.....can u send me an invetation pls i know that i have lied to you jenny pls.....

Looks like it will have to be a mutual venue?? I'd do an invite but it may need help with the requirements. Any takers?? PM me.

Posted: Sun Jun 03, 2007 7:59 am

If you really wanted to be sure... I live near Farnham Surrey...

Posted: Mon Jun 04, 2007 9:50 am

Thanks Tasman, but this dingbat doesn't know what planet he is on let alone country. Cheers

Posted: Tue Jun 05, 2007 9:27 am

Here's what I sent him. Maybe we will find out how good his spanish is. I have a guy who works in my team who is fluent, so more fun. Laughing

Quote:

Lawrence,
Why did you tell me you had a business and was living in the UK? Now you are in Spain? Next I�ll hear from you that you don�t have any money and your name is not Lawrence and your from Mars? When am I going to get the whole and total truth from you? Do I need to put my hands around your throat and then slap you around a bit?
Jenny (Why do you constantly disappoint me?)
PS: De que parte de Espania eres?

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